500th Time Reborn, A World Only Known By Women: The Karma System
Chapter 15 Kinda Sorta
"Call yourself a man all you want in private, but that word means nothing here, and it will only lead to confusion. If you are serious about helping out, I suggest you start referring to yourself as she," Senna said after I dried her off using some cleaning magic.
It left her better than before, so I was able to get off the hook for soaking her, but she had started to rave.
Still, the thought of calling myself she irked me a bit. I was not a woman, nor would I squat to pee!
"It will be fine. I will just not bring it up, but I am not sitting down to pee!" I complained, and Eliza looked up at me.
"Then how do you do it?"
"Haha! The magic of a growth! I can do it standing, aim where I would like, and best of all! I can piss around corners!" I said more of a joke, but both girls looked far too impressed.
"Do you have to use magic to do that? Can you teach me?" Eliza asked excitedly, but I had to crush her dreams.
"Sorry, this is strictly a growth thing," I explained, and Eliza slumped against me, looking dejected.
"I don't think that has many uses," Senna said, and I scoffed.
"Oh? I could turn around and pee on the back of the horse right now! No stopping or making a mess! You tell me that isn't useful! I could stand up in the stirrups, face forward, and still pee off to the side!" I declared, and Senna's eyes went big.
"Oh! I see! Well, when you put it that way, I can see how you must save a lot of time!" Senna agreed, and I grinned.
If I had memories, this would have to be one of the silliest ones. Nothing about this world was expected, and I loved every inch of it so far!
We were finally getting close to the city, and it was a reasonably big place, but I couldn't see inside due to the massive walls. It could have very well just been one solid fortress from what I could see from here, but from what I could guess, it was over three miles wide.
"Umm, I think I should do the talking for now. I think it will be better that way, so just smile and wave at everyone," Eliza explained to me, and I nodded.
"Sure, I am more than okay with that," I said, and that was the truth.
I would far sooner suck up all I could from everything around me than get myself into trouble from opening my mouth. This place was going to be a lot different than the village, so I would have to stay on guard.
Women were crafty creatures and were just as bad as men in some respects. I expected to meet all manner of people and flavors of crazy.
We came up to the front gate, which was open, but as we got near, a loud and long horn sounded, echoing down the wall. Eliza flinched at the sound and looked to the west, where I followed her gaze.
"Undead!" Senna cried and was about to take off with her horse.
"Stop! Do not leave yet! Gimme that damn sword and take my little one here! I will deal with whatever that damned creature is!" I roared, getting fired up.
A world of only women was great, but one with giant monsters that needed killing was what my dreams were made of! The thing was about a quarter-mile from the wall, and I was a half-mile from that place on the wall.
"You can't seriously be thinking about fighting that thing!? Leave it to the warriors!" Senna shouted at me, but I narrowed my eyes at her.
"Can you promise me that none of them will get hurt or die?" I growled.
"Well, no, of course not!" Senna exclaimed.
"Then shut up and give me your damn weapon because I don't plan on dying any time soon!" I growled back at her and jumped off the horse, walking over with my hand out.
"What are you doing?! Do you really believe that you can fight that thing all alone?!" Eliza asked as I took Senna's sword, pulling it from the sheath and handing it back.
"Just wait here, and watch. I don't think either of you should question my ability to judge my own strength," I said as Pure Magic sucked into my body and wordlessly chanted to teleport five hundred feet forward.
I blinked between the wall and the thirty-foot-tall creature with arms sticking out everywhere with a massive body. I drew in the Pure Magic to surround the sword, holding the sword up in the air, pointing up.
"Holus Vox Trinity," I said softly.
At the end of my sword, the light burst with light arcing up in the air splitting into more golden streams. The all arched downed and pummeled the creature, stopping it dead in its tracks.
I lowered the sword, the blade still ten feet long of glowing Light Magic, and I blinked forward to drive it through the creature's only head. The creature died and then started to flake away like ashes, but there was something left over.
The sword in my hand crumbled into dust, but I had expected that. The fact that I was able to even channel a single spell through it was enough to give the craftsman, or craftswoman in this case, credit.
I walked over and found a purple gem with something blue swirling inside of it. When I picked it up, it was almost like there was something alive inside of it.
[Hello?]
I almost dropped the crystal upon hearing the voice, but it had come from inside my head.
"Hello?" I asked back.
[Can you hear me?]
"Umm, yes," I said, not sure how to answer a crystal.
[If you summon me, I will grant you three, kinda sorta wishes.]
It left her better than before, so I was able to get off the hook for soaking her, but she had started to rave.
Still, the thought of calling myself she irked me a bit. I was not a woman, nor would I squat to pee!
"It will be fine. I will just not bring it up, but I am not sitting down to pee!" I complained, and Eliza looked up at me.
"Then how do you do it?"
"Haha! The magic of a growth! I can do it standing, aim where I would like, and best of all! I can piss around corners!" I said more of a joke, but both girls looked far too impressed.
"Do you have to use magic to do that? Can you teach me?" Eliza asked excitedly, but I had to crush her dreams.
"Sorry, this is strictly a growth thing," I explained, and Eliza slumped against me, looking dejected.
"I don't think that has many uses," Senna said, and I scoffed.
"Oh? I could turn around and pee on the back of the horse right now! No stopping or making a mess! You tell me that isn't useful! I could stand up in the stirrups, face forward, and still pee off to the side!" I declared, and Senna's eyes went big.
"Oh! I see! Well, when you put it that way, I can see how you must save a lot of time!" Senna agreed, and I grinned.
If I had memories, this would have to be one of the silliest ones. Nothing about this world was expected, and I loved every inch of it so far!
We were finally getting close to the city, and it was a reasonably big place, but I couldn't see inside due to the massive walls. It could have very well just been one solid fortress from what I could see from here, but from what I could guess, it was over three miles wide.
"Umm, I think I should do the talking for now. I think it will be better that way, so just smile and wave at everyone," Eliza explained to me, and I nodded.
"Sure, I am more than okay with that," I said, and that was the truth.
I would far sooner suck up all I could from everything around me than get myself into trouble from opening my mouth. This place was going to be a lot different than the village, so I would have to stay on guard.
Women were crafty creatures and were just as bad as men in some respects. I expected to meet all manner of people and flavors of crazy.
We came up to the front gate, which was open, but as we got near, a loud and long horn sounded, echoing down the wall. Eliza flinched at the sound and looked to the west, where I followed her gaze.
"Undead!" Senna cried and was about to take off with her horse.
"Stop! Do not leave yet! Gimme that damn sword and take my little one here! I will deal with whatever that damned creature is!" I roared, getting fired up.
A world of only women was great, but one with giant monsters that needed killing was what my dreams were made of! The thing was about a quarter-mile from the wall, and I was a half-mile from that place on the wall.
"You can't seriously be thinking about fighting that thing!? Leave it to the warriors!" Senna shouted at me, but I narrowed my eyes at her.
"Can you promise me that none of them will get hurt or die?" I growled.
"Well, no, of course not!" Senna exclaimed.
"Then shut up and give me your damn weapon because I don't plan on dying any time soon!" I growled back at her and jumped off the horse, walking over with my hand out.
"What are you doing?! Do you really believe that you can fight that thing all alone?!" Eliza asked as I took Senna's sword, pulling it from the sheath and handing it back.
"Just wait here, and watch. I don't think either of you should question my ability to judge my own strength," I said as Pure Magic sucked into my body and wordlessly chanted to teleport five hundred feet forward.
I blinked between the wall and the thirty-foot-tall creature with arms sticking out everywhere with a massive body. I drew in the Pure Magic to surround the sword, holding the sword up in the air, pointing up.
"Holus Vox Trinity," I said softly.
At the end of my sword, the light burst with light arcing up in the air splitting into more golden streams. The all arched downed and pummeled the creature, stopping it dead in its tracks.
I lowered the sword, the blade still ten feet long of glowing Light Magic, and I blinked forward to drive it through the creature's only head. The creature died and then started to flake away like ashes, but there was something left over.
The sword in my hand crumbled into dust, but I had expected that. The fact that I was able to even channel a single spell through it was enough to give the craftsman, or craftswoman in this case, credit.
I walked over and found a purple gem with something blue swirling inside of it. When I picked it up, it was almost like there was something alive inside of it.
[Hello?]
I almost dropped the crystal upon hearing the voice, but it had come from inside my head.
"Hello?" I asked back.
[Can you hear me?]
"Umm, yes," I said, not sure how to answer a crystal.
[If you summon me, I will grant you three, kinda sorta wishes.]
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