Rebel Demon King

Chapter 1085 Love Is Just One Word
I think love is never humble, as long as you have courage. ——Shen Youyi
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"I noticed the word 'stealing', why do you think you're stealing another person's life?"

"Because the core of this story is fatalism, everyone's fate will be intertwined with other people and things, and the content of this book is adapted based on reality, so as the creator, I am very clear about each of them. The direction of fate. Whether it is reality or fiction, the logic of fate should be followed. This is just like fortune-telling. When a person is born, the fortune-teller can judge his general fate from his birth date. In reality, Si Cai It is impossible for a person like Wei to have any connection with Zhou Ling. They should be separated from each other, like two isolated islands in the sea, each in a corner. So I cut out a part of the fate of another person, and put Si Caiwei through words. Being connected with Zhou Ling created more possibilities for them."

"So in reality, your student is a couple with another person?" Xu Lan asked.

Shen Youyi smiled and said, "Yes, a very beautiful couple."

"Then why don't you take that girl as your prototype?" Xu Lan asked seriously.

"Firstly, I don't want to write a clichéd story about a gifted scholar and a beautiful woman; secondly, I want to give deeper thinking to the two things of fate and love. If I simply record the reality, it will make myself meaningless. I want to use a more meticulous brushstroke to describe the lines of fate growth. In my opinion, fate is not a single line, but divergent, just like a tree. The tree of fate for each of us grows along the timeline. Every event will grow into a leaf or a fruit, and the success and ups and downs of a person's life are hidden in the annual rings. Although I changed Si Caiwei's fate at the beginning of the book, Si Caiwei and Zhou Ling will There won't be an ending. It doesn't depend on me or the readers. It depends on the world in the story. Maybe it depends on whether there is a moon in the night in the eastern hemisphere on a certain day, or it depends on whether there is a moon in a certain small town on a certain day. no snow"

"I think your readers will be worried when they hear you say this, and they will definitely hope that Si Caiwei and Zhou Ling will have a happy ending."

"No, actually Si Caiwei and Zhou Ling don't have many CP fans, and readers like Taoyao more."

"why?"

"Because Taoya is a very likable character, and the setting is more suitable for young people. Si Caiwei is strict, not to mention she is Zhou Ling's teacher, which is against ethics."

"As a teacher, when you write such a plot, how do you think about it? Do you think it's a bit out of line?"

"Of course I will. Therefore, whether it is in reality or in the novel, I feel guilty. However, Zhou Ling and Si Caiwei in the novel are currently out of love and end in courtesy, and there is only a touch of ambiguous affection. This I think it's normal. I can't say what I will do in the future. There are other things that I feel guilty about. I don't have much talent in reality, which is different from what readers imagine. I'm just good at crafting. If only I Myself, I can’t use words to achieve this novel, I can only be a teacher. I’m not saying that I don’t like being a teacher, I like the profession of a teacher very, very much, just like I want to be a novelist. I start from my I got inspiration and materials from my students. I use words day and night to build up a world that should not belong to me. I am obsessed with it. When I turn on the computer, I can isolate myself from reality. I use words to weave fate. They are very Brilliant, but a lie. I sometimes find it hard to believe that I need the comfort of a lie to fall asleep. I am disturbed by it, but I still only fall asleep when I am exhausted in front of the computer. Waking up every day is the most painful time for me. Because I have to return to reality, I not only have to accept the fact that I am not Si Caiwei, but also have to face various dilemmas."

"I heard a strong sense of oppression from your language, can you tell us what kind of predicament you have encountered to make this happen?"

"Part of it comes from the pressure of the economy, part of it comes from the anxiety of being a new mother, part of it comes from the expectations of parents, and part of it comes from self-doubt."

"We understand the first two very well. Can you tell me about the latter two for me and the readers who care about you?"

"Actually all four are related because I'm a single mother."

"Your experience reminds me of JK Rowling."

Shen Youyi smiled and said: "I'm not that inspirational. My family conditions are not bad. My grandfather is the principal of this school with a long history, and my father also served as the vice principal of this school, and I also I used to be a teacher here"

"No wonder you choose the classroom as your interview location. Most of the guests have no requirements for the venue, they only want comfortable seats, comfortable lighting, or comfortable questions."

"No, not at all. If you want to say it's comfortable, this place doesn't give me a comfortable feeling. In fact, this place is also a place I really want to escape. Coming back here today can be regarded as summoning up the courage to face myself."

"Escape from school? Face yourself? How should I understand?"

"When I was studying here, a good friend of mine committed suicide because of the teacher-student relationship. That incident left a very deep psychological shadow on me. At that time, my father was the vice principal, and the teacher was his student. , In dealing with this matter, I feel that he is very unfair. This is something I still can’t let go of. For a long time, I even have to forget this memory, or even split another personality, so as not to hate him But in fact, my main personality can still perceive some hidden clues in the emotions caused by memory, and it makes my character become isolated from the world. I am afraid of contacting other people, and I am afraid that others will know that I have mental problems. I can't even look at pictures of my classmate. I obviously spent many times reading poetry with her. I clearly remember her crying to me on the phone. That was the last time I saw her cry. Then I heard the bad news. The moment I heard the bad news, I felt self-blame, and all kinds of regrets hit my heart. They were like nails, nailing my heart to a certain piece of memory one by one. Medium. Maybe the pain was too severe, maybe I was a cowardly person, so I chose to escape. I was full of guilt, and I threw all this to another personality, while the main personality pretended to be sympathetic to everything. I don't know, live calmly"

Xu Lan said in surprise, "You mean you have a dual personality?"

Shen Youyi nodded, "However, my two personalities are normal, and they won't affect my life, let alone the lives of others."

"Can you tell me how you feel?"

"How should I put it? It's like a person has two souls, but one of them is hidden tightly, and no one can find it. Only I know it. When I need her, I will give her body to her." She controls it. Because I have the initiative, I can choose to hand over my body to her or not. As long as I don’t want to, she can only be hidden in my heart. It is impossible to know of her existence."

"So. Is this the self you want to face?"

"This is only a small part of it. To be honest, I will now be grateful for these painful experiences. People will always encounter difficulties in their lives. No matter how smooth the wind is, she will definitely encounter them. Sometimes difficulties are not necessarily bad things. , it could also be a good thing.”

"What if it's a bad thing?" Xu Lan asked.

"Learn to be patient, especially when there is nothing you can do."

"Just patience?"

"I probably just learned to be patient before, but later... I learned to accumulate strength from someone. When you have strength, you must have the courage to change it."

"That's why you were interviewed at school? You think you've accumulated enough power and you want to change it?"

Shen Youyi nodded firmly, "Yes, that's why I will be interviewed at school. I want to change it!"

Xu Lan leaned over slightly to look at Shen Youyi and asked curiously: "Then what do you want to change?"

"The first is to change the attitude of my parents towards me. As far as I am concerned, the biggest dilemma is that it is difficult for you to find a balance between family and ideals. You want to choose the deer trail full of thorns, but Parents always hope that you can walk on the road of happiness. The problem is that they tell you from the experience of others that they are right, and you also know that they are right to some extent, but your heart is Yearning for the Lu Qi that no one is willing to go. They always regard whether they have lived well or what kind of honor and material things they have obtained as the weight of happiness. They think that happiness is the purpose of our journey in life. But I don’t think so, I I think happiness lies in the process of trekking, in everything you experience along the way, as long as it is what you yearn for, even if you go through hardships, you are happy. Happiness is the feeling in the journey, it is never the end. I hope they can understand my choice "

"Secondly? What do you want to change next?"

"Secondly, I want to change myself." Shen Youyi stood up from her seat. She looked down at the seat that once belonged to Cheng Mo, and then said softly, "I still can't get out of the role of teacher. But today I want to To break free from this bondage. I can't let myself be imprisoned in the memory of the past, even if the teacher is indeed a label that once belonged to me, I shouldn't escape, I want to tear it off now."

Xu Lan asked with interest: "Then how do you plan to tear it off?"

Shen Youyi stepped out of her seat and walked to the podium. She picked up a piece of chalk from the chalk box, faced the camera and said with a smile: "Students, this is the last lesson I will teach you as a teacher." She Turn around and write cracklingly on the blackboard: "Song, Fan Chengda, "Che Yaoyao Chapter", the car is far away, the horse is flickering. You travel east, east, east, and east, and you fly to the west wind. May I be like a star king like a moon, The night and night stream is bright and clean. The moon is temporarily dark, and the stars are always bright. Stay bright and wait for the moon to return, and it will be full of three or five."

In just a moment, there were a few more lines of beautiful chalk characters written in thin golden script on the blackboard.Shen Youyi put down the chalk, turned around and said in the warm and gentle gurgling voice she used to in class: "The only thing is to say goodbye to those who are in ecstasy! It is because people leave, but the love is not over, that there will be "Yangliuan" Only when the sadness of "Dawn, Xiaofengwanyue" is there is the helplessness of "only lowering the brows and turning to the heart". The poet Fan Chengda's "Che Yaoyao Pian" expresses the difficult The parting feelings conveyed in words, and the unswerving meaning of staying together”

".The artistic conception of the poem is ingenious in that there is no 'time'. It may be the real scene seen by the heroine standing alone at the top of the building, or it may be an overprint of a beautiful virtual scene that has long passed away, or it may even be created in the heroine's mind. But no matter which one, the heroine insists on sticking to it and is willing to wait for the reunion."

"This is my last lesson." Standing on the podium, Shen Youyi closed his eyes, stroked the podium lightly, and bowed deeply to the camera, "Thank you everyone."

Xu Lan also stood up and clapped her hands three times "pa, pa, pa". In the empty classroom, her applause seemed so lonely.She asked puzzledly: "I don't understand why you changed your identity as a teacher, and even used notes like 'tear off the label', and why did you choose Fan Chengda's "Che Far Away Chapter."

"It's all about the last thing I want to change."

"So what's the last thing you want to change?"

"I hope this segment can be filmed in the school auditorium, and I hope to end the interview there"

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The camera switched to the auditorium, and when the photographers set up their camera positions, the spotlights in the auditorium were turned on "snap, slap, slap", and when the orange light was projected on the oily wooden floor, Shen Youyi stood on the boarding platform. At the edge of the stairs, she looked up at the not-so-long stairs, and said, "Actually, the story about me, my sub-personality, and the dead classmates is not over yet."

"Is there a follow-up?"

"Yes." Shen Youyi turned to look at Xu Lan, smiled, and said in a shy tone: "This last paragraph, can you help me play "A Word for Love" as the background music."

Xu Lan nodded and said, "Of course there is no problem."

Shen Youyi took a deep breath and looked at the remaining cone of spotlight again. She seemed to hear the singing echoing in the empty auditorium.

"Putting away the dark clouds in the sky is as beautiful as blue velvet. I climb mountains and ridges for you, but I don't have the heart to look at the scenery. I think you can't help yourself. Every thought has a new dream"

She felt that the clock of fate was running in the void of music, the singing was flowing through the cracks like sand grains, and there was a turbulent force urging her. She closed her eyes to make sure that this was not a dream, and that it was about to To the altar of self-destruct.

She is ready to swing the pendulum of fate, like putting a noose on herself.

As she climbed the steps, she remembered the famous motto written by Zweig in "Queen of the Broken Head": She was still young at that time, and she didn't know that all the gifts given by fate were secretly priced.

However, Shen Youyi's heart was not full of despair, only the joy of being reborn from the ashes. Wearing the professional skirt she wore that day, she walked gently towards the towering gallows.

"I once drew a picture. In that picture, he and I walked side by side under the green sycamore tree on the campus. The sun was setting, and the sun was shining on the two people through the gaps in the leaves. I am still His name was written all over the back of the painting and I was so filled with guilt writing his name that I couldn't even believe I wrote it. But inside I knew what I was doing and I thought To fill my dreams with him forever, forever. In my dreams he was eternal and I thought that was the only way I could have him."

Shen Youyi's voice was very soft, as if she was reciting a love poem, she narrated the words like memories and pictures.She walked up the steps slowly, with a graceful style of fireworks falling from the sky.

"Memories about him alone occupy an important moment in all my memories. I will think of him when I close my eyes, and I don't want to wake up when I think of him. I always dream, dreaming that I am still standing on the podium, he Sitting on his seat, propping his chin with his hands, he listened to my lecture without any expression. I wrote on the blackboard, and I recited a poem. When he lowered his head, there was light in his pupils. I stared at him because he It is the source of my inspiration. He allows me to live without the stereotypes, and to enter the world that I cannot reach alone. For me, the memories constructed by those words are real, and they are even stronger than my own memories. Be precious. And thank God for the inspiration that God gave me. Once I have the source of inspiration, reality sometimes becomes insignificant. There is no more grand and continuous fireworks than fantasy. My fireworks were captured when I was 24. Ignite, for the rest of my life, I will probably try to describe this fireworks with words."

In the long and short narration, Shen Youyi finally stepped onto the stage of the auditorium, and the cone of light in the center was waiting for her, like an immortal purgatory.

Under the gaze of long guns and short cannons, she slowly and resolutely walked to the center of the light until she was completely enveloped.Then she gently raised her hand and took off the mask she had been wearing all the time, revealing that washed-out face with a bit of pitiful tenderness and a bit of amazing charm.

The empty auditorium was filled with brilliance, and the photographers and staff who were lazy just now were all refreshed, especially the men.

Xu Lan's eyes also brightened several times, she stared at Shen Youyi's easily addictive face and couldn't help but whisper to herself: "It's much more beautiful than I imagined."

Shen Youyi was completely unaware of these scorching gazes. She lowered her head and looked down at the auditorium, as if she had returned to that day. He stepped onto the stage and announced that he had found the suspect of Huahua, and then Cheng Mo appeared in the eyes of everyone, and admitted that he was the instigator with an almost mocking attitude.Then he stepped down amidst curses and insults. He walked alone through the crowd who spurned him, bearing everything alone.

And she did nothing.

"Five years ago, he admitted in this auditorium that he painted the pornographic paintings that appeared in the classrooms and on the teaching building, but they were not." Shen Youyi's voice trembled, like a nightingale caught in thorns "The last thing I want to change is to go back to that day and go up to the stage and say it to him."

"Tell him I love you"

The people in the audience were in an uproar, and even Xu Lan opened his eyes wide in surprise. The excitement in his eyes obviously caught some shocking news.

Shen Youyi closed his eyes, as if there was another voice whispering: "No. Yes. Love."

The huge auditorium was extremely quiet, and she seemed to feel the boiling through time and space to silence.

She raised her head high, and said calmly and decisively:
"Cheng Mo, I love you."

"I miss you, take courage,
Spread the message with the map of love,
I hope you haven't forgotten,

I will always protect you,

No more wandering and searching,
Love is just one word,

I only say it once,
You know I only show it with actions,
Promise forever,

Hold on and hold on,
It's never too late to give.

Love is just one word,

I only say it once.

I'm afraid those who hear it will arouse lovesickness,
Let time fly by,
search for your shadow,

Make you happy, I am willing to try"

(End of this chapter)