human suffering

Chapter 2 Who has no pain in heart?

Cai Gen looked at the mad old man, and as he asked every sentence, he stepped forward step by step, dragging his twisted thighs, and drew a bloodstain on the milky white floor.

The hand still stubbornly handed the bean bag forward, getting closer and closer to the bar, as if I could smell the blood on the bean bag.

I want to turn around and run, but my legs don't seem to be my own anymore, and I forgot how to move my legs.

The hand holding the cigarette began to tremble, and he wanted to speak, but his chin was a little stiff, and he tried very hard to squeeze two words out of his mouth.

"No."

After speaking, it seemed to be too direct, so I tried my best to open my mouth, moved a bit, and added,

"I don't eat sticky food, heartburn."

The old man was obviously dissatisfied with this answer, and became more and more excited.

"Then why did you buy it the year before last?"

Cai Gen seemed to try hard to recall, and answered uncertainly,

"Maybe, do you have spare money in your hand?"

The old man was enraged by Cai Gen's words and continued to ask loudly

"Then why didn't you buy it last year?"

Cai Gen was so frightened by the sudden loudness that his hands shook, the cigarette fell on the bar, and he quickly picked it up.

However, the vermilion plywood on the bar was still burnt with a black spot.

Severe obsessive-compulsive disorder made Cai Gen forget the old man in front of him and began to wipe the black spot with his hands, but the black spot was very stubborn and the bar was no longer perfect.

The old man looked at Cai Gen who was cleaning the bar suddenly. He didn't answer his own words. He was even more angry and asked again loudly,

"Then why didn't you buy it last year? Did you agree to change the meal for me?"

Cai Gen, who was tortured by the black spot, was still wiping the black spot on the bar hard. His emotions began to change from fear to annoyance, and he answered casually,

"I have no spare money in my hand."

After saying that, I regretted it a bit, but it would be better not to provoke him again, and added again,

"Look at you poor."

When the old man heard this answer, he was obviously stunned, and he was no longer so excited. He seemed to be pleading and complaining.

"Then why don't you pity me this year?"

Cai Gen was completely impatient, he put out the cigarette he didn't get six puffs of, and shouted in a strong manner,

"What the hell do you want?"

The old man did not expect the other party to be so tough, and suddenly, as if he had lost all strength, he slumped on the ground,

"I hate you, I hate why you don't buy my bean bag, why don't you let me change my meal, why don't you pity me."

Cai Gen was helpless when he saw the old man like this.

"You said that you were injured like this, so go to the hospital. Has the owner escaped? What's the use of hating me?"

The old man didn't seem to hear Cai Gen's words, so he muttered to himself,

"If you bought my bean bag, I could go home earlier, 20 miles away, and I wouldn't be killed by a car. I feel aggrieved and bitter."

Cai Gen was stunned for a moment, this information was a bit surprising, and then he stared at the old man sitting on the ground carefully.

Not only the thighs were twisted and deformed, but even the chest was sunken.

Is this dead?Got hit by a car this afternoon?

He looked back and looked at the two gods of wealth on the bar, one was still heroic and the other was still kind, but he turned a blind eye to the old man.

Call your wife?It seems too late.Call 110?What do you say?There's a dead old man selling beanbags in my shop?

I took out a cigarette, my hands were shaking a little bit, I lit it twice, then I lit the cigarette, took a puff, clenched my teeth,

"Okay, uncle, then tell me how hard you are? Go away after that."

This time the old man heard Cai Gen's words, as if it was very important, and began to complain seriously,

"My life is miserable. When I was young, I had no money to study, so I could only scrape food in the soil. Fortunately, I have a smart daughter who can study well, but my daughter also has a hard life. He died when he was 7 years old. I am a big man. Do you know how hard it is to pull her up?"

Cai Gen nodded and listened, took a breath,

"My daughter is very good, she was admitted to the university in the provincial capital, she also found a good job in the provincial capital, and she is getting married. I have not paid off the debt for my children's schooling, and I can't afford the dowry. I'm sorry my daughter."

Cai Gen continued to nod and took another breath.

"My daughter has a child, and they are all raised by my mother and my grandmother. I am an old man, and I can't do anything to help. I feel bitter."

Cai Gen may not agree with this point, he did not nod his head, took a cigarette,

"My grandson is 8 years old, and I have met 3 times. A few days ago, he said that he would come to see me in the new year. He also told me that he wanted to touch a mobile phone. Our family has been in drought for 3 years, and there is really no money in the ground. , more than 1000 yuan, I can't afford it, I'm sorry for my grandson, I'm sorry for his grandmother, I'm useless."

When Cai Gen heard this, he wanted to say something, but gave up and took another breath.

"The year before last, you bought my bean buns, and I thought to myself, is this a rare commodity in the city? As soon as winter comes, I come to the city to sell bean buns, ask from house to house, sell from house to house, and come back in the morning and evening, more than 20 miles away. I can't bear to eat at noon, I'm a bad old man, I'm bitter."

Cai Gen listened silently, let the cigarette ignite by himself, did not smoke,

"Today, I haven't sold a single bean bag, and I'm looking at the Chinese New Year. I'm so embarrassed to meet my grandson. When I watch TV, they say I touch porcelain. I think I'll touch it too, in case I can get a mobile phone money. , but my life is miserable, I caught up with a female driver and mistakenly used the accelerator as the brake, do you think I am suffering?"

When Cai Gen heard this, he didn't want to listen, but he didn't dare to interrupt the old man's narration, just wait.

"You said that in my whole life, when I was young, I was busy with my parents, and when I was older, I was busy with my daughter. I didn't enjoy any blessings, and I just died. You said that my life was hard or not?"

When Cai Gen heard this, he finished his last puff of cigarettes, put out the cigarette butt, and said to the old man,

"The cigarettes are finished, and you are finished, let's go."

When the old man heard him go, he became excited again,

"I'm not reconciled. I can't just let it go. It's not fair that I suffer so much."

Cai Genqiang resisted the impatience in his heart and said as calmly as possible,

"It's said in the book that there are eight sufferings in life. Your suffering is nothing, hurry up and leave."

The old man is very stubborn, and is more accepting of death.

"I don't understand what the eight sufferings are. Anyway, I can't just let it go. I have suffered all my life, and it's over like this? I'm not reconciled."

Cai Gen saw that this old man was still excited, what can you do if you are not reconciled?

Immediately, my heart softened again,

"Old man, let me tell you, who doesn't have any bitterness in his life? Who can live more freely than anyone else?

All the same, do what you should do, do what you can do, then you should be content, relax, and let's go. "

"You don't have back pain when you stand and talk. You have to be responsible to me. It's because of you that I am so miserable."

Cai Gen saw that the old man had already started to mess around, stopped talking, and silently lit another cigarette.

In the past, the old man who sold bean buns was not like this, Cai Gen recalled hard.

　Fettered by material desires, I feel the sorrow of my life; barbarians are still in the true nature, and feel the joy of my life.Knowing it can be sad, then the dust will be broken; knowing it can be pleasant, then the holy realm will be self-realized.Quoted from "Cai Root Tan"

　　

　

(End of this chapter)