June is our farewell song

When he got off the bus, Gu Yuan suddenly felt an absurd freedom.

He saw Yang Hao in the alley behind the bus stop, with the gentle but gloomy smile still on his face. When he saw Gu Yuan, he tilted his head and opened his eyes slightly, with dark pupils. , reflecting the thorn-like light, he waved to Gu Yuan and said hello with a smile:
"How did you go on the exam, good friend?"

Gu Yuan smiled and looked into Yang Hao's eyes. This man's unkindness had tortured him intermittently for a year.After hearing Yang Hao's story from Ye Jun, Gu Yuan originally planned to let him go and not argue with him, but he didn't expect him to come to him anyway.

"Yang Hao, you must be very proud. You think your plans have been successful and your goals have been achieved, right?"

Yang Hao stopped laughing, straightened his neck and looked at Gu Yuan intently.

"I just let you experience the feeling of despair, just for a month or two. Proud? I'm not that naive yet."

Gu Yuan pursed his lips. He had just said goodbye to Lu Siyao and had no intention of being nice and sweet with him.He slowly took two steps forward and said:
"If you weren't eager to see me despairing because of my poor test scores, and you weren't eager to see my results, why couldn't you wait even one night?"

Yang Hao's hand froze in mid-air, then slowly lowered it.

"so what."

"It's nothing, but you may be a little disappointed. I didn't do very well in the exam, but it wasn't to the point of Waterloo."

Yang Hao's expression froze for a moment, and the word "impossible" and "no" instinctively slipped out of his lips, and he swallowed it back hard. Gu Yuan's quiet and determined gaze made him feel hot in his chest. Hot, he lowered his head, and after a few seconds of silence, he quickly raised his face and smiled.

"No, I'm quite happy for you."

Gu Yuan looked at his smiling face that was uglier than crying, and the mask that he had sewn piece by piece with his own hands, and couldn't help but feel sad.He is addicted to observing other people's behavior and constantly making secret guesses, like a lonely game.But how long has it been since he looked at his heart?Maybe he kept using the same words to convince himself, or maybe he was numb and forgot to take off the mask after wearing it for a long time.

"You've learned to lie, and your face doesn't change and your heart doesn't beat. Isn't this the first time?"

As Yang Hao spoke, his face looked a bit dumbfounded, as if he was facing a troubled child. This look made Gu Yuan feel even more disappointed, and he gradually became dissatisfied.

Gu Yuan took another step forward and looked into Yang Hao's eyes, but only saw pity and ridicule, which were the patterns painted on the mask.The hot weather, the sticky sweat, the half-smiling expression that seemed frozen - all the emotions were hidden under disguise, covering up the true side.

"I just want to ask you one question, Yang Hao." Gu Yuan said, "Do you really think that Chi Yu's current appearance is better than what she showed in the past two years?"

"of course."

There was almost no unnecessary pause, and it was short and powerful, which made it difficult for Gu Yuan, who was mentally prepared, to accept it.

He nodded, picked up the backpack that had been thrown aside, took a deep look at Yang Hao, and turned around to leave.

"If you think so, then so be it."

"Do you think she's gotten worse?"

"..."

Gu Yuan walked silently towards the alley with his bag on his back, when Yang Hao's voice came from behind.

"It's just because she's not what you like anymore."

"..."

Gu Yuan stopped, threw the bag aside, and smashed it against the wall.

"You can't accept the real her at all. You just like her disguise because..."

"Stop lying." Gu Yuan interrupted him, but still turned his back to him, "Yang Hao, stop lying."

"...Huh?" As if he finally saw Gu Yuan's reaction, an excited expression appeared on Yang Hao's face, "What? Are you finally losing your composure? Why are you pretending to be a gentleman..." Although He had a premonition, but Yang Hao's dodge was still a little slow. Gu Yuan punched him hard in the face, causing him to lose his balance and fall backwards to the ground.But even though his face was in burning pain and visibly swollen, the excitement in Yang Hao's expression did not dissipate. Instead, he became more excited. Even his voice became excited and he laughed loudly:
"Ha, hahaha, hahahahaha... I knew it, I knew it! You absolutely can't help it. When you can't solve the problem, when you are helpless, you can only resort to violence! Hum... you have always It’s always been like this! It’s never changed! Not at all!”

"Yes, indeed not." Gu Yuan walked over, grabbed his collar, and dragged him up from the ground, "I'm not the only one who hasn't changed."

Yang Hao tried to struggle, but was unable to break away from the boy who had regained his strength. At this time, Gu Yuan took the initiative to let go of him and dusted him off.

"You were the one who asked Ye Jun to come that day, right? You wanted to be a hero, but I unintentionally beat you to it." Gu Yuan adjusted his collar for him, "After knowing about this, I always felt that you were right It’s normal for me to be dissatisfied.”

Yang Hao was a little confused, but he didn't dare to move.

"And in fact, you really didn't do anything to other people. As you said before, you just told Feng Ziqiu about his family situation, just showed him the photos of Qi Yu and me on the street, and just told him Qi Yu’s mother’s real thoughts were revealed. Those things at the sports meeting were done by those two fat and thin pricks in Wen Jin’s class. Knocking down Qing Si was a drama you made to anger me, but I didn’t expect that she would fall. Into the river. As for what you said on the stairs of the school later, you probably made it up to stimulate me."

Gu Yuan picked up his backpack, took out the diary left by Qing Si, and opened it: "Qing Si said that she saw you wandering outside the ward for a long time more than once, but the people in the next ward finally noticed something and opened it. After opening the door, you left immediately. You did ask Siyao to inquire about Ye Jun's condition, and maybe you did think about doing what you said, but you still couldn't make up your mind in the end. "

Gu Yuan couldn't help but pause when he said this. The fingers holding the pages of the diary subconsciously tightened and unclenched, forming several fine wrinkles.The tall buildings in the distance seemed to be embedded in the burning clouds, while the windows reflecting the light were like stars, dotted in the hazy sunset, like tears in the sky.At the back of the diary it reads:

"Honestly, even with a suitable match, the success rate is not high. Her body can no longer support such a consuming operation. At two o'clock in the morning, I heard the doctor's voice, my father's sigh, and my father's sigh in the corridor outside the ward. Mother's sobs. There was a foggy scene outside the window. Without the company of stars, the hazy moon suddenly became a little gentle. She and I looked at each other for a long time, until mother came back, without tears, she only said I laughed, but I didn’t feel happy at all, but turned away guiltily.”

"I wanted to give up, really. I felt ashamed of my cowardice. I thought of my parents and everyone in the school who were still struggling for the future. I immediately understood that I shouldn't give up, but I..."

"I said I wanted to leave quietly, and I only told the doctor and no one else."

"Keep this secret for me, and for the sake of the doctor's career. After all, he is soft-hearted because of me."

"please."

He promised to keep it a secret, so naturally he would not tell Yang Hao, but only said:

"Her leaving has nothing to do with you. Other people's affairs have nothing to do with you, either."

He grabbed Yang Hao's collar with his right hand and punched him on the left side of his face.

"I want to settle Chi Yu's account with you."

"Uh...uh!" Both sides of Yang Hao's face were swollen, and the pain and numbness of the shock made him unable to speak for a while.

Gu Yuan knelt down in front of him.

"I don't know if it was because of the inexplicable familiarity that I noticed her at first. I couldn't see my heart clearly. I didn't even know if I liked her. It wasn't until she left that I discovered that those things in my life were about Her little details have become a habit."

"I'm sorry for her, I know that. Leaving me was the right decision for her to make, and it was absolutely right." Gu Yuan came up to him and pressed his forehead, "After that, I saw the changes in her. A good change. There is no pendant, no bracelet, and her long hair has been cut off, but she is confident, hard-working, and serious, but you..."

"You actually brought the matter to her grumpy father, and then you came down from the sky like an angel to comfort her and solve all the problems. Just to be a hero, you made her suffer so much."

Gu Yuan pushed him down and stood up. He stepped on his ankle with his right foot and gently placed it on it without stepping down.

"There once was a woman who was very kind to you and left suddenly, and Chi Yu's tenderness reminded you of her. You liked her, but you hated her, hated her for changing for something else, hated her for leaving for someone else. So. You came up with this plan that you thought was 'perfect', which can not only take revenge, satisfy yourself, but also push her back to you."

"What you told me in front of the school bulletin board is absolutely right. What you did was not because of others, not because of me, and not because of Chi Yu. It was just for yourself, to satisfy your dirty self, and for To make up for the mental trauma in your childhood, deep down in your heart, you are still the poor boy who feels inferior because of his father's fault, crying because his mother ran away from home."

"It's true that I haven't changed. I will still go back to this incorrect way when I can't do anything." Gu Yuan looked at Yang Hao lying on the cement floor, "But like I said at the beginning, I haven't changed. It’s not just me.”

"Look at the dark and deserted alleys around you. After all these years, you will still subconsciously choose this kind of place."

He stepped down hard with his right foot, and amid the screams and screams, he turned around, picked up his backpack, and walked towards the setting sun.