Back to the era with space supplies

Chapter 205 The Unknown Side

But the money has already been settled, so Si Ningning didn't think much about it.

Lifting the snakeskin bag and the things on the counter, and thanking them again, Si Ningning turned around and joined Xu Shuhua and the others.

On the way, they ran into male educated youths first. Li Lingyuan and Song Shuhan were holding wax gourds and pumpkins respectively, and only Mo Beikong held hands.

Hence, it seemed logical for Mo Bei to take over the snakeskin bag from Si Ningning.

Coming out of the department store, Jiang Yue was thinking about buying a table, and begged Si Ningning to take her to the scrap yard.

Si Ningning has already changed her face, and when she comes to the scrap yard again, old man Cheng will naturally not recognize her.

There were a lot of educated youths entering the scrap yard, and old man Cheng was afraid that there would be fish in troubled waters if there were too many people, so he followed the educated youths and stared at them from time to time.

Si Ningning's legs were sore from running all morning, so he said hello to old man Cheng and sat on the rocking chair at the door to wait.

Not to mention, the rocking chair swayed back and forth, and the fan was shaken from time to time, which was very comfortable.

Si Ningning nestled in the rocking chair, dangling on his toes. The sky outside the door was too dazzling. Si Ningning covered his face with a cattail leaf fan. He had just been comfortable for 2 minutes when footsteps suddenly came from his side.

At first I thought it was old man Cheng coming, but when I opened the corner of the cattail fan, I found out that it was Mo Bei.

"..."

Their eyes met and they were silent for a while, Si Ningning was defeated first, and sat up straight, "What's wrong?"

"They still have to wait a while, aren't you going to the post office?" Mo Bei asked.

"Forehead……"

How did it get involved in the post office again?
Si Ningning was a little dazed, and then heard Mo Bei's cold voice continue: "I... I will accompany you. If there is a package, I will help you get it."

Before Si Ningning could speak, Jiang Yue, who was closest to them, turned her head first, "Si Ningning, you guys go! Leave us alone!"

Si Ningning didn't go to the post office this morning because there was no letter to post.But the current situation is that I will go home immediately after shopping.

I don’t know if there are any packages at the post office, but I should take a look at them anyway. If there are, wouldn’t I miss it if I don’t go?
Si Ningning can understand everyone's thoughts.

Her small face was wrinkled, and under the watchful eyes of Mo Bei and Jiang Yue, she could only bite the bullet and respond, "Okay, put that thing here first, let's go and have a look, and be back soon."

"Ok!"

Si Ningning knew the approximate area of ​​the post office, but had never been there.

Following Mo Bei all the way to the post office, what Si Ningning always thought in her heart was: As long as her stepmother and step-sister are there, it is impossible for her to receive letters or packages from the Si family.

But in fact, as soon as Si Ningning handed the household registration page into the window, the staff said that there was a letter from her, which came from Beijing.

Si Ningning was stunned for a moment in disbelief.

Is there really a letter from her?

After waiting for about 2 minutes, Si Ningning finally got the letter.

Holding the envelope and walking outside, Si Ningning looked at the familiar handwriting on the kraft paper envelope, and some fragmented memories emerged like a tide, and the memories of the two worlds were intertwined, including hers and the original body's.

At that moment, the surrounding scenes and objects and the noisy sounds suddenly faded away, and then what appeared in front of my eyes was the indifferent and disgusted eyes of my father who was wearing a suit and leather shoes, and the middle-aged man who was dressed in linen and pinched and hit the original body. year women.

Si Ningning couldn't tell whether it was her emotions or the emotions of the original body. She just felt that for a brief moment, it seemed that a big hand was holding her heart tightly, making her unable to breathe.

Those cold or vicious eyes, like nails, were driven hard into her brain nerves, and her head seemed to be turned into a gong in an instant, humming when it was smashed.

Si Ningning's face was pale, a layer of cold sweat appeared on his forehead, his footsteps were weak, and he couldn't stand upright.

"What's wrong with you?" Mo Bei realized something was wrong, and grabbed Si Ningning's wrist in time to prevent her from falling, "Si Ningning?"

At first, he thought that Si Ningning was being tripped, but it was not until he saw her ugly face and the beads of sweat on her forehead that Mo Bei realized something was wrong, "What's going on? What's wrong with you?"

Although he uttered few words, he seemed calm, but in reality he was very restless.

Si Ningning's thoughts were sometimes clear and sometimes fuzzy, and he held on to Mo Bei's clothes with a trace of consciousness, and his voice trembled slightly without realizing it: "I, I'm fine...it's too hot, I'll just sit down for a while."

Mo Bei looked at Si Ningning's hand that was holding the corner of his shirt. The veins on the back of his white hand were bulging, and the nails and knuckles were trimmed and rounded. Due to the strength, there was a dazzling white circle.

"I'll take you to a cool place to sit."

Mo Bei frowned silently, and took Si Ningning to a cool place in the corner.

But he couldn't help but have some doubts in his heart.

Really...

Is it just because of the heat?

Really, are you okay?

of course not.

Those memories that were once sealed in the depths by Si Ningning surged up along with the memories of Si Ningning in the 70s, and the seemingly healed scars were vigorously uncovered again, and his heart was bloody and bloody...

Such indifference, disgust, and condescending eyes, like looking at bedbugs, repeatedly penetrated Si Ningning's heart.

A kind of gloom, pain, resentment, humbleness and extreme grievances enveloped his whole body, Si Ningning bit his lower lip with his teeth, and slowly squatted down.

——Ba, Baba, Ning Ning's fifth birthday!I want papa to hug, papa...

— go away!Butler, take her away!

Disgusting scolding at five.

Nine-year-old's big hand pushed her away.

The 12-year-old high-end leather shoes that smashed the cake.

Still 15 years old, the slap on the face and the cold eyes...

No matter how good she is, she will still be hated. She has long since stopped looking forward to it!
but……

Si Ningning may be tough, kind, or optimistic, but she is human.

Every human being has weaknesses, family affection and family are her weaknesses.

Her experience is very similar to that of Si Ningning in the 70s. Invisibly, it magnified the complex feelings in her heart several times.

Si Ningning's eyes were sore and swollen, and tears fell like raindrops. A wave of hatred surged up in his heart, completely dominated by his emotions.

She hates them!

Whether it is Si Zhennan in the 70s or Sifu in the 21st century.

Si Ningning hated them all.

Hate them for not raising them, hate their cold blood and ruthlessness...

Since you hate her, since you hate her, since you hate her and don't like her, why did you give birth to her?
Si Ningning clenched his hands into fists, his nails deeply embedded in his flesh.

She will not forgive them.

Never, ever!

I made a decision in my heart, but the memory in my mind was still rolling.

Si Ningning's lower lip was bitten white and bleeding, and the strong hatred in her chest made her tremble.

However, just as she recalled more and more painful memories and sank deeper and deeper, Si Ningning's shoulders were suddenly restrained, and someone shook her forcefully:
"Si Ningning, Si Ningning!"

Si Ningning seemed to be under the gloomy ice layer, and the sound of a mountain stream dripping into her ears dimly. At that moment, it was as if someone broke through the ice layer and tried to pull her back from the desperate situation. Reality.

But, is... who?
Tears blurred her eyes, Si Ningning knew that she should calm down and calm down, but the grievances and resentment in her heart drained her rationality inch by inch, leaving her no time to think about it.

"No matter, no matter how hard I try and how good I become, Dad, Dad won't love me, and won't even look at me more!"

"I don't want him to love me any more!"

"I will never be abandoned again!"

Because I know I won't be loved, so I don't ask extravagantly.

If you don't ask for extravagance, you won't be abandoned.

Si Ningning covered his face with his hands, tears leaking from between his fingertips.

She was crying about her father's indifference and her own grievance and pain, but her voice was broken, and every word was like a knife. Ling Chi's contradictory heart pierced Mo Bei's heart fiercely.

Mo Bei couldn't imagine what Si Ningning had gone through, but his desire to be good to Si Ningning, to see Si Ningning smiling, had never been as strong as it was at this moment, more like a raging fire. , intensified.

"The sun is scorching in summer, but there will be rainy days, so what? The sun will not always be there, but there will always be sun." Mo Bei clenched his fists tightly, clasped Si Ningning's wrist, and put the hand covering her face Pulled away, leading her to look at him, "Love... People who value you are also."

Rubbing away the crystal teardrops from the long eyelashes of Si Ningning's eyes with his thumb, Mo Bei's cold eyes flashed complicatedly, and then slowly softened, "Maybe not everyone values ​​you and loves you, but there will always be someone who values ​​you and holds you up The palm of your hand, put it in the first place."

"You are a warm little sun. Everyone in the educated youth spot needs you, everyone puts you in an important position, and more people will recognize you in the future."

The always cold and indifferent person comforted the crying girl in a clumsy, literary and conservative way: "Occasionally a prickly head, it doesn't matter at all, forget about those bad things."

The corners of Si Ningning's eyes were red, and she shook her head in frustration, "No one really likes me except grandma. Even if they show that they like me, it's because all they see is appearances. If it's the real me..."

Si Ningning did not continue.

Shady, sensitive, low self-esteem, negative energy, who would like such a person?
The deep flaws in her heart have crushed Si Ningning's usual clear self-confidence. At this moment, she is not only sensitive, but also plunged into deep self-doubt.

"Why doesn't anyone like you? I just..."

Mo Bei interrupted Si Ningning to continue his wild thinking. Halfway through his speech, his starry eyes shook and changed the subject: "Everyone likes you. Can't you tell? Everyone will ask for your opinion every time something happens. You are very important, far more important than you It's much more important to imagine."

It seemed to be comforting Si Ningning, and it seemed to be telling himself, "You are very important", Mo Bei bit the four words very hard.

Si Ningning was emotional, her forehead was covered with fine sweat, Mo Bei put his palms together to fan her, and continued to guide her in a warm voice: "You are very smart and know how to adjust your emotions, right?"

Mo Bei actually had some kind of guess in his heart.

Si Ningning suddenly became so sensitive and fragile, all because of the letter he just received.

And the sentence "No matter how good I become, my father will never love me" is enough to explain the identity of the sender.

For some reason, Mo Bei suddenly remembered a long time ago, probably when he just went to the countryside, he happened to see a scene. At that time, Si Ningning rolled up his sleeves, and his slender arms were covered with scars and bruises...

It is the trace of being beaten.

Thinking of a certain possibility, Mo Bei lowered his eyelids, and the eyes that were gentle just a second ago suddenly darkened. Even so, he still tried his best to control his tone, and gently comforted Si Ningning: "Since you have already left there, don't think about it anymore." , we live forever in the present.”

Those who love you will always love.

Those who are willing to be with you will always be with you.

Those who don't love you and despise you don't have to pay attention.

Under Qinglang's gentle comfort, Si Ningning's mood gradually calmed down, and she looked at Mo Bei with red eyes, as if confirming something. After a long time, she lowered her eyes, nodded hesitantly and gave a dull "hmm".

"Good boy." Mo Bei's heart suddenly relaxed, his starry eyes slightly bent, and he gently rubbed the top of Si Ningning's hair as if rewarding him, "Are you thirsty?"

You must be tired after crying for so long.

Si Ningning shook her head slowly, and after only a moment, her lips parted and her voice was hoarse: "The tears are dry, and my face feels uncomfortable..."

Si Ningning had already calmed down, remembering the behavior of crying in the street just now, and what she just said, she lowered her eyes in embarrassment, avoiding Mo Bei's sight unnaturally.

"I brought some water, I'll give it to you upside down, you wash your face with it first."

Pulling Si Ningning to the edge of the steps on the side of the post office, Mo Bei unscrewed the lid of the kettle and poured water out. When Si Ningning washed his face, he freed his hands to fumble in his pockets, and before Si Ningning wiped his face with his sleeves, he took the handkerchief handed over.

Si Ningning stared at the light blue handkerchief handed to him, and was stunned for a long time before taking it.

Mo Beishou handed it forward again, "Yes."

Si Ningning took the veil. The texture of the veil wasn't very good, but the color was fresh and clean. When she put it on her face, she could faintly smell the scent of saponins.

Hastily wiped off the moisture on his face, and saw that the handkerchief that was gradually becoming mottled and dark blue due to the water stains, Si Ningning quickly retracted the hand that was returning it, "Thank you, I, I will wash it and return it to you!"

There were tears and snot again, it was the fault of Mai Tai, Si Ningning was really embarrassed to return it.

Mo Bei originally wanted to say no to trivial matters, but seeing Si Ningning's serious expression, he acquiesced.

General Mo Bei carried the water bottle on his body again, and his tone was cold and revealing a gentle and pious charm: "Have a good rest, are we going back?"

"Hmm." Si Ningning nodded and gave a light "Mmm". After walking a few steps, her slender brows struggled to wrinkle, "I just thought of something bad, that's why..."

After hesitating again and again, Si Ningning opened and closed his lips and begged in a low voice, "Can you not tell others?"

Si Ningning didn't want to recall those things, let alone let others know about them.

If possible, she even hoped that Mo Bei would forget it immediately.

"What did you tell others? You were crying because you were so homesick?" Mo Bei pretended not to know what happened just now. "Don't worry, everyone is homesick. They cry much harder than you."

These words were half true and half false, but Si Ningning understood that Mo Bei was talking with her.

(End of this chapter)