I want to work hard too!

Chapter 1011
Ye Qingling took another long breath, poured himself a glass of wine, and felt bored, as if trying to give himself some courage.

She took a few more bites of food with her chopsticks and said, "If I were given a chance to choose again, I would never come here in my life, and I will never come here again. Maybe I am not suitable for this place, here It is suitable for two kinds of people, one is the upper class and the other is the bottom class.

Zhongbuliu is like me, coming here is simply hell on earth. When I came here, my family gave me about [-] dollars to bring here. I have about [-] dollars, and [-] dollars was for me. In terms of living here, it is enough to survive here, and I think so too, after all, this money is almost a yearly expenditure of a family here, and I can at least last for two or three years of living expenses by myself.

Coming here with this money, I feel that I can settle into a new life quickly and live a good life, at least I thought, because I also graduated from the 985 undergraduate and master degree in China, and my family is considered well-off. Ever since I was a child, I have always thought that I was excellent. As you said, I was good-looking at the beginning. It can be said that I came here with a sense of superiority.

I came here mainly to change the environment and see the outside world. When I first came here, I contacted a friend of mine. He is my senior. I came here because of him. He was a man of the day in our school. I liked him, and she liked me too.

But when I got here, I didn't find anything wrong at first, but gradually, I discovered the problem. He has been spending my money. The rented house is the rent I paid for him in advance. Renting a house here is really not good. It’s cheap, and it’s not surprising that many people sleep on the side of the road. What’s more, only economically developed areas have job opportunities, and the rent will not be less. I pay for eating out, and I spend money for clothes.

But $[-], only $[-], spent by two people, without any income, will be spent soon, he said every day to go out to find a job, but there has been no news.

Later, he ran away and took all the few thousand dollars I had left, so I couldn't contact him anymore.

I didn't have the face to tell my family, and I didn't have the face to go back. At the beginning, I thought, I just took this money to pay the tuition fee, which made me see many things about many people. At that time, my mentality was quite open.

And the rent is less than half a year, I can use this world to find a job, and then settle down here easily, take my parents over, and even want to buy something and send it to you.

But soon, I was hit continuously. First of all, the domestic college diplomas are basically not recognized by the companies here. It is also difficult for Qingbei to find a job here. Only those with global rankings or some well-known local universities have them. Opportunity to find a relatively good job.

It was really the first time that I suffered such a serious blow. I submitted eleven resumes, but nothing came of it. I lowered the requirements again, and submitted 25 resumes, but still no response.

I was hungry, because I ran out of money and almost had enough food at home, I started to panic, so I went around looking for a job, you know, because of different aesthetics, my beauty has no advantage here up.

I have become extremely ordinary, I can’t accept it, I fell into anxiety, in the Chinese forum here, I saw that there were hourly workers recruited, I applied for the job, and the other party gave me a chance to serve the plate, but what should I do? Well, I broke two plates on the first day and was fired by the boss.

I went to change to the second one, and this time I became more cautious, and I was hit again, because I found that many people who worked with me were either illegal workers, and they might have been in the same area for several years. In this store, either the same conditions as mine, or even better conditions than mine are also here.

Gradually, I learned something, there is no shortage of talents here, what is lacking is top talents, I am worthless here, if I have not read so many books, have not seen so many worlds, and do not have a good growth environment.

If I don't have any advantages in China, I don't have that sense of superiority, I won't suffer, just like many homeless people or people with no way out here,
They have never even felt something, they are not in pain, they are used to it, and they even feel satisfied working here to earn some money to send home, or the local people living in slums, it doesn’t matter if some people eat relief every day , are you used to it?

But what about me?I have eaten delicacies from mountains and seas, and I have seen the prosperity of the world. I cannot accept it, and I am even more afraid of being ridiculed when I go back like this.

There are many kinds of people here who post online that they look like they are living a good life. In fact, it is a kind of vanity to satisfy themselves. They want to make their relatives and friends in China envious. In fact, their lives are very ordinary. They are cautious here, but The life they think is good is actually not as good as what I used to do in China, so I can't get along well with them, because I don't want to live without goals, I want to live a better life than before.

Later, I wanted a way out, and I planned to find a school here to study and work while studying. I couldn’t pay my rent when it was due, so I shared the rent with someone. Do you know that if a person has been in a good place? The environment can be changed by the environment.

But in an environment that is not very good, it is difficult for an individual to change the group, but it is easy to be assimilated by the group.

I lived with a group of people in a dilapidated house, the sanitation was poor, and I was afraid of being inspected, because multiple people were not allowed to live in the same room here. I gradually changed my way of life, and I still insisted on it at the beginning. , Then I started not washing my feet or brushing my teeth, eating and drinking too much.

The only thing that can make my life more fulfilling every day is reading. I want to get into a good school and go to school while working, but do you know what despair is?
The most desperate thing is that I worked hard for a year to be admitted to a university here to study as a graduate student. I was full of expectations and thought that everything would change. You know, if you are in China, as long as you study, there will be changes.

I did well in the college entrance examination, got admitted to a good university, and then went to graduate school. After I came out, I was assigned a good job. Even if I am a graduate student in an ordinary university, after graduation, I either have to go to the school to recruit, or I can enter various exams. position.

It is to give people a hope that as long as you work hard, there will be rewards and hope, but what about this?

I was studying while working part-time. I was so tired that I was about to suffocate. When I graduated, I found out that I didn’t seem to have changed from before I came here.

When the age is reached, many companies have requirements on age, and there is employment discrimination in employment opportunities.

Can you believe that a black pearl who graduated from a prestigious school lost a job interview to a white rose who graduated from an ordinary undergraduate?

The discrimination here is very serious. It is so serious that a person who is not as good as you in all aspects can kick you out and take your place.

If I don't have a diploma, then forget it, I admit it, I can wash dishes and deliver food here for the rest of my life, but I am not willing, everyone thinks that I must be better here than in China.

Just like when I imagined that the senior would have a good life here, I still can't believe that a person who was so good before will become a thief here, a person who makes me sick just thinking about it.

The longer I stay here, the more I am afraid that people will know my situation. This is why many domestic academic masters will cut off contact with their relatives and friends after coming here, because they are afraid of being asked too much. .

If the rich second generation came here to study abroad, they would enjoy it, but most of them didn't. After coming here, they really didn't have any advantages, and they couldn't let go of their face to go back, and finally drove themselves to a dead end.

I don't have much contact with my family, but my parents felt it. They sent me money several times and helped me get through a few difficulties, but I can't let them help me anymore. I can't afford to lose that person.

The second elder is so old.I spent almost all of my savings, and they even wanted to sell the house and give me some money.

Zhao Mingyang, do you know how ashamed and self-blame I was at that time?I hate myself for being like this.

If this is the case for the rest of my life, I would rather die, I am not reconciled, is this the case in my life?
Do you know what people think when they are on the verge of despair?Wanting to change my destiny with some nihilistic things, I went to temples and churches to ask the gods and Buddhas to bless me to make a fortune.

I went to buy lottery tickets to get rich overnight, and the more I did this, the more I fell into a quagmire.

I even want to find a rich man to take care of me, but do you know what is the worst thing here?

It is to divide the area, the rich and the poor can really achieve no intersection, because the rich cannot enter the area of ​​the poor, and there are layers of checks, which seem to be intentionally separated.

Wave after wave of people who came here couldn’t get used to it. Some just mixed in, and some went back. The chances of being able to get out here are too low. Most of the people who stay are two types, one is real Those who are rich don’t have to worry about food and drink, and those who don’t want to go back and be seen as jokes.

Those who come here to do manual work earn some money and go home. They can still go back. They go back from 0 to 1, and they go back with the fruit of the harvest. I go back from 10 to 0. I accept it. no.

When I finished school here, I was full of expectation to find a decent job and start again, but the job I found was really so-so, and the money I was given was not as much as washing dishes. It is even more difficult to send some money back to the family.

Gods and Buddhas are useless, lottery tickets are useless, and I started to get tainted with gambling. I tasted some sweetness at first, then lost all my money, started to borrow money on credit, and then failed to repay the loan, which became a breach of trust.

I ran here from another continent, and started to completely embark on another road of no return, a road of self-destruction. Every day, I went to the community with a group of homeless people to receive relief meals, which were basically bread. I wanted to make some money every day.

I was chased by people in Hanguo City just now, because I ate the Bawang meal in a restaurant, and I was hungry, but I was afraid that if I didn’t pay for eating in a Chinese restaurant, I would be recognized by others, and I basically didn’t live in the Chinese community anymore.

Because I was recognized by people a few years ago, but it was not so miserable at that time. Since then, I have not been in the Chinese community, but basically in other communities. I really want to have a good meal today.

But the other party wanted to pay first before ordering, so I couldn't help it. I ran to their back kitchen and stole some food, but was discovered.

In fact, I was discovered more than once, and when I was caught, I was taught a lesson, and I got used to it.

My final bottom line is that I didn't sell myself to make money, you know what I mean, then I would really have a nervous breakdown, to put it bluntly, my self-esteem hurt me, and I even said that my mental ability was not good enough, I didn't resist some things, my mentality collapsed.

The sense of loss made me choose to give up on myself, especially over the years, there are more and more Chinese people traveling, going to school, and working here. I am always afraid of being seen by others.

I dare not answer the phone calls from my parents. They have always cared about me, but I feel that I will embarrass them. I also do manual labor to earn money. Over the years, I have sent home one after another. I basically live frugally and live on the street, wanting to save some money for my parents to provide for the elderly. The happiest thing every month is to send some money back so that they don’t worry about me.

I don't want my parents to worry about me anymore. I dare not go back to my country. I'm afraid that people will ask me what I'm doing here. If they come to play and ask me to entertain them, what will I treat them for? "

Zhao Mingyang was silent for a long time after hearing this. He understood what Ye Qingling said. Originally, a goddess with a good workplace, a good appearance, and a well-off family. Nine percent of the people.

Since she was a child, she has been praised and praised by others, and everyone is scrambling to please her.

After arriving in the United States, the psychological gap made her unbearable, especially when she met unkind people. She probably wanted to live a good life with her boyfriend, but in the end the ending made people...

She couldn't accept this kind of betrayal, deceit, and gap, and her mentality collapsed. In fact, if she adjusted her mentality, she might be much better than she is now, but it can never be better than when she was in China.

After all, it is impossible to work here better than domestic ones. The advantages of academic qualifications and appearance are gone. Because of the difference in aesthetics, the most important thing is that the relationship network is broken, and it is impossible to be stronger than the domestic network.

There are actually quite a few of this kind. Zhao Mingyang's former high school classmate later went abroad to study, and he was also the top student in Zhao Mingyang's class. In the end, he lost contact. No one had any news of him. This is indeed a bit unreasonable.

Because the same rich second-generation classmate also went abroad, and kept in touch with everyone after studying abroad for two years, but he returned to China later.

The other one who has not been in touch has never come back. I guess he is in the same situation as Ye Qingling. After coming here, the proud son of heaven has become ordinary and transparent. The psychological gap is too big. Some old friends left some good impressions.

Employment discrimination is a common problem here, just like when Lao Yu succeeded in starting a business in China, he always felt that the two seniors who studied abroad and worked there were better than him.

At the beginning of the 90s, Lao Yu was already worth tens of millions. In his words, he was like a nouveau riche, because he was rejected when he went abroad to study, and he was worried about it. Then he started a business in China. He didn’t expect to make money so fast, but he still I think his two seniors are much better than him.

Until later, Lao Yu went abroad. He had a strong obsession with going abroad. He always wanted to study abroad and make a lot of money. In the end, he first went to Canada and saw a senior. At that time, Lao Yu brought a lot of cash and bought a At that time, very expensive branded leather jackets were fine to wear.

When the senior first saw him, he asked him if he made any money. Lao Yu said he didn’t make much money. The senior took him away for a long time before seeing the senior’s car. The senior said that there is no parking fee for parking here. After arriving at the senior’s home , At that time, he had already settled down there, but Lao Yu could see the conditions.

As a result, the two chatted. The senior lived in Canada very generally, and his salary was not high at all, and he had to work part-time as a foreman.

There is no way to go back. Let alone many opportunities were missed. The most important group of people were embarrassed to go back. When they heard that Lao Yu’s annual income was nearly [-] million, the other party was very shocked. Lao Yu invited him to go back and start a business with him.

In Lao Yu's words, I didn't expect it to be so happy, and I went back soon. I can't take back what Lao Yu said. It can be seen from his autobiography that he may have invited him politely at that time, because he I have some ideas in my heart, and I don't have much obsession with going abroad.

As for the other senior who is in the United States, he is doing well, better than the Canadian senior. He works in a scientific research studio and his salary is considered stable. Although the senior studying in the United States has repeatedly emphasized that he was very good there at the time, He also said that Lao Yu deliberately discredited him. In fact, there are really many people working in the scientific research studio there, and the salary is just a little above the average line.

As a result, Lao Yu invited him again, and he agreed. The point here is that they are not unwilling to come back. It would be fine if someone invited him, but because of this, many people were stuck. At first, it is not necessary to go abroad. After going abroad, I don’t have the strength to invite people back.

Most people are in the situation where they want to be invited, but no one invites them, and they want to send their resumes back, but those who also send their resumes are not academic masters, but academic gods, such as Sohu Zhang, who is quite a scientist. To become a scientist, if he wants to start a business, someone will invest in him at the level of starting a business.

Most of them are ordinary top students, and they will not be in high positions when they come back. At most, they will hold ordinary positions in a large company, because you studied abroad, what school?Is it ivy?To hold a key position in a world-class company after graduation?

As far as these two points are concerned, only Sohu Zhang, Baidu Li, Shen Zhang from the investment industry and a few people who have returned to China are all at this level, and they are all at the level of academic gods.

After most people go out, especially the group of people who are said to be excellent children from other people's families in China, they can't accept the gap of becoming ordinary people abroad.

If it is an ordinary domestic university, after going abroad, there may not be that kind of gap, and you are not afraid of being ordinary, because most people have not experienced all the way of the top students and their excellent life.

To put it bluntly, Xueba cannot accept that he is also a mediocre person.

"I want to know, are there many like you?" Zhao Mingyang asked, he had an idea.

(End of this chapter)