I really don't want to be a novelist

Chapter 399 Little Gerrit, what are you thinking?

"Grandma Milia..."

Before leaving home early in the morning, little Gerrit visited Grandma Milia in her bedroom,
Although Grandma Milia was unconscious, she was still on the bed in the bedroom.

But at this moment, what little Gerrit could face was the tombstone and the new grave.

Looking at the words on the tombstone carved by his father Hoss, the eyes of the little Gerrit who had been silent all the way turned red,
Before seeing the tombstone again, the death of Grandma Milia seems to have just gone to a distant place and has not come back.
At this moment, little Gerrit knew that Grandma Milia was here, but he could only see the grave, and Grandma Milia could no longer answer his call.

Father Hoss looked at Milia's grave, then turned his head to look at his own child, Little Gerrit, and just put his arms around Little Gerrit's shoulder, without saying a word.

In little Gerrit's red eyes, tears kept rolling down, rolling down on the ground, soaking into the soil,

"Grandma Milia...Grandma Milia!"

The herb that Little Gerrit had been holding tightly in his hand was finally thrown to the ground.

Little Gerrit was in pain, crying heart-piercingly.

Father Hoss just had red eyes, hugged little Gerrit, and let little Gerrit cry in his arms,

Little Gerrit wept until he lost his strength,

Then gradually stop,

Then he walked away from his father Hoss, turned around, bowed his head, and went home
He walked back in the direction he was going, without saying a word.

And his father Hoss, looking at little Gerrit, just squatted down, picked up the package of herbs that little Gerrit threw on the ground just now, and just followed behind little Gerrit silently.

"...What are you doing picking up the herbs!"

"It's useless!"

Little Gerrit walked a long way in silence, then suddenly turned around, shouting loudly at his father with red eyes.

"I know."

Father Hoss only responded to Little Gerrit, but he never put down the herbs in his hand.

Little Gerrit lowered his head again and walked forward,

and walked for a long time,

"Father... Huos... Do you think that the reason why Grandma Milia got sick was because she was not devout enough to God?"

Little Gerrit asked with red eyes.

"Perhaps Grandma Milia is too tired and needs a good rest."

"Why is Grandma Milia so tired?"

Little Gerrit was almost inquiring, he had too many questions to figure out.

Father Hoss didn't speak any more, but after being silent for a while, he told little Gerrit,

"Little Gerrit, you continue to study and figure out this problem. Grandma Milia also hopes that you can continue to figure out these problems."

"I see……"

Little Gerrit responded silently and did not speak again.

He had already walked back home with his father Hoss.

……

"...Greet, you can stay at home for a while, I'll go out to weed the fields for a while."

The grief brought about by Miria's death did not give father Hoss a rest for too long.
In the evening, I had hot brown bread and soup, and had dinner with little Gretel.

Father Hoss took the farm tools, left the house, and went to the family's field.

Little Gretel, who was still full of grief, was sitting at the door of his house, looking at the gradually setting sun in the west,
It seems that he was in a daze in a daze, watching the sunset completely, and the sunset glow was also submerged by the night.

"... Is it little Gretel, poor little Gretel, grieving over Melia's death?"

While little Gerrit was sitting by the door in silence, a voice was heard on the road in front of the door.

Little Gretel looked over and saw the person passing by on the road, Granny Varina.

Little Gerrit was silent and did not speak.

"Oh... Poor little Gretel, Milia will always watch you in heaven, don't be so sad anymore."

Grandma Varinna comforted little Gerrit with sympathy and pity on her face,

Little Gerrit was silent for a while, but said suddenly,

"Grandma Valina, it's so late, are you going to see Uncle Walker?"

"How did Uncle Walker die..."

Grief seemed to let little Gerrit speak without any scruples, and he directly asked Grandma Valina one of the questions.

"Yeah... I'm going to visit your Uncle Walker."

Grandma Varinna stiffened for a moment, unwilling to say more about this question,
He just replied like this, and left in a hurry.

Little Gretel watched Grandma Varina's figure go further and further away until she was submerged in the night.

Is that where the village cemetery is?

Little Gerrit turned his gaze back, and remained silent again, sitting by the door, staring at the night in front of him without saying a word.

until,

The night is getting darker,

The father who went out in the evening finally came back.

Some of the dew of night, or the rotten grass seeds and leaves and mud of the fields,
Father Hoss's clothes were all wet and dirty,

"……why are not you sleeping?"

Seeing little Gerrit who was still sitting by the door, his father Huston stopped and asked softly.

Little Gerrit was unwilling to speak, but just raised his head to look at his father, shook his head,
"...Go to sleep, you have to go to school tomorrow."

Father Hoss spoke again.

Little Gerrit fell silent for a while, then stood up from the ground,

About to walk into the house, he paused again, turned back to look at his father Huos,
"Hoth, you've never been out so late in the fields doing farm work before."

"Are there so many weeds that need to be removed?"

"People in the village say, Father Hoss, you are a person blessed by God. There are always very few weeds in the field, and the harvest is always very fast, and the harvest has always been good."

"Have you lost God's favor now?"

Little Gerrit asked suddenly.

Father Holden stopped his movements and turned his head to look at little Gerrit.

There was a long silence,
Then he turned his head, entered the house, put down the agricultural tools in his hand,
"There is no God's favor, only sinners who have blasphemed the oracle and violated the laws of the church."

Father Hoss dragged his wet and dirty sackcloth, and changed with dry clothes from the side,

Said so.

"...It's Grandma Milia, isn't it Grandma Milia who works in the fields at night?"

Little Gerrit asked.

"..."

Father Hoss was silent, didn't speak any more, just looked back at little Gerrit,

Facing Little Gerrit's eyes, his father Hoss was silent for a long time before he answered,
"Ah."

Little Gerrit, who received an affirmative answer, fell silent,

He lowered his head and didn't ask any more questions.

He understood some things, but there was more doubt and bewilderment in his eyes.

His grandfather was judged by the church as not being devout enough to God because he blocked the way of the knights of the church, offending the gods and the Lord,
Even after death, one cannot return to the embrace of God, and there is no tombstone erected in front of the grave.

His father and Grandma Milia violated the laws of the church and the will of God,

But before this, other residents in the village said that Father Hoss was a person who received God's grace and care.

And the favor of God that my father received was brought about by violating the laws of the church and the will of God.

Will Milia return to the embrace of God after her death?

Little Gerrit's eyes were full of doubts and bewilderment,
There are many things in it, and there seem to be many problems.

At this time, Father Hoss came over, rubbed the hair of little Gerrit, and then walked away,
"Go to bed early, you have to go to school tomorrow."

"Father... Howth, let me help you weed the fields tomorrow."

Little Gerrit was silent for a while, then raised his head again,
"No, you need to go to school!"

Hoss spoke again.

Little Gerrit was silent and didn't speak any more.

……

"...Grit, what are you thinking?"

In school, the only Imoen who was familiar with little Gretel,

Turning his head and calling out to little Gerrit,

Little Gerrit, who was distracted, turned his head and just shook his head,
"No……"

"Imon. Is there anyone in your village who has been invaded by demons?"

"Of course, there are always people who are not religious enough to the Lord."

Facing Little Gretel's question, Aimon replied naturally,

"Before, there were people who asked my father to pray to God and pray for God's favor, but they were not devout enough. Even if my father prayed devoutly, they could not get God's favor for them."

"What about those people?"

"Of course they were invaded by evil spirits and died. It is very difficult for such a person to return to the embrace of God after death. Every time I have to work hard, my father sincerely prays for them and asks for God's forgiveness before they can be buried and return to the embrace of God. .”

"Um...will your father charge money for this?"

"Grit? What do you mean?"

"No, I just thought that for a person like your father who is respected by the residents of the village, after working so hard for others, maybe other people will thank your father."

"Well, that's right, although my father declined every time, they always felt that this was the only way to express their gratitude, and my father could only accept it.

Last time, some households sent black bread with too much bran added to it, which was really unpalatable, even worse than those sent by other families. I couldn't eat it after two bites. "

"Um……"

Little Gerrit responded and said nothing.

And Aimeng seemed to still be interested in chatting with him, so he asked again,
"...So, Gerrit, what were you thinking just now?"

"I didn't think anything..."

Little Gerrit just responded like this.

Aimon gradually lost interest in talking to little Gerrit, and turned to chat with other people.

Little Gerrit was still sitting where he was, a little silent,

……

in the afternoon,

Little Gerrit left from school,

There are still many lingering questions in my mind,
With his head buried, without saying a word, he just walked along the road in the town.

Until suddenly there was a loud noise ahead,

It was a carriage passing by on the road, and the pedestrians on the road were giving way,

Little Gerrit also quickly hid on the side of the road, watching the carriage gradually go away,

Just ready to go on the road.

"Little Gerrit, what are you doing standing at the door, come in quickly..."

At this time, someone on the side of the road called him,

Little Gerrit turned his head, only to realize that he already knew the door of the doctor's consulting room.

Inside and outside the clinic, as always, there are crowds of people,
There are patients who come to seek treatment, and there are spectators who come to see the doctor's bloody operation,

Probably a doctor who just finished an operation in the consulting room, holding a sharp ax in his hand, his body is still covered with blood,

During a short break, I happened to see little Gerrit passing by the door of the consulting room, and shouted.

Little Gerrit stood at the door of the consulting room, paused, raised his head and looked into the consulting room, but didn't go in.

He used to come to work in the consulting room every afternoon because he wanted to know something from the doctor that could treat Grandma Milia and buy back some herbal medicine.

But now, it seems that this is no longer necessary.

"...Little Gerrit, hurry up, stand by and help me with the surgery!"

Seeing Little Gerrit not moving, the doctor who regarded Little Gerrit as his assistant became a little angry and shouted loudly,

Little Gerrit was silent for a while, but still walked in.

Passing through the swarming crowd watching the operation, little Gerrit walked up to the doctor.

"Oh, look at my little Gerrit, look at my assistant, it seems that I'm not in a good mood today."

It seemed that Little Gerrit came over after listening to his greeting, and the doctor was a little satisfied.
Talk casually with little Gerrit again,
"Little Gretel, where is your grandma Milia? How is it? Does God take care of her?"

"She's dead."

"Oh, what a pity. If I could have sent me to give her bloodletting treatment earlier, I might be able to leave the hospital bed now."

The doctor responded somewhat exaggeratedly to the news of Melia's death that Little Gerrit told him.

Little Gerrit just watched the exaggerated expression of the doctor and kept silent.

"Okay, my little Gerrit, the most important thing now is that you continue to be my assistant. We will start the next operation soon."

"What's the next operation?"

The doctor turned his head and asked.

"Amputation! Amputation!"

"Okay, come on, our audience is already waiting to see!"

Flocking in the consulting room, the audience who paid for the tickets, some shouted excitedly, some were trembling with excitement, their eyes were red,

It's like expecting a great show.

Little Gerrit witnessed this scene and did not speak.

I saw that, under the yelling and shouting of the audience,
A patient was carried up, followed by another, a little shy, dressed in coarse linen,

Every time the audience shouted, her body could not help shrinking the peasant woman,

And the patient who was carried up seemed to be an old farmer, obviously the husband of the peasant woman,

"...Why are there still women? Women will affect the perfection of surgery."

The doctor frowned, looked at the peasant woman and said,
When the peasant woman heard the words, she couldn't help but shrink back,

"If you want me to operate on your husband, please go out and wait outside."

The peasant woman raised her head at this time, and said with some fear and hesitation,

"...Doctor, you said that you want five silver coins to amputate the limb. I only have three silver coins and three hundred copper coins here...Can you do the operation first, money...the rest of the money, I will give you later..."

The peasant woman took out a lot of scattered money from her pocket,

He held it in both hands and handed it to the doctor.

The doctor watched, frowning even deeper.

"What bastard! Let people in without paying! What bastard did it!"

The doctor turned his head and roared angrily,

The audience who gave tickets to the side also booed and yelled.

The peasant woman's body trembled constantly, her waist bent lower and lower, she kept begging,

"Doctor, please, please..."

At this moment, the anger on the doctor's face suddenly disappeared, and a smile appeared on his face again,

But he didn't speak to the peasant woman, but looked at the surrounding audience who had given tickets,

"Okay... the fate of this poor man is up to the audience to decide!"

"Tell me, do you want to amputate, or do you want to amputate this poor ghost now!"

The doctor said exaggeratedly, shouted loudly, inciting emotions, as if doing a show,
"... Hurry up! Hurry up and cut it... Take your axe!"

"Quick!"

"You money-swindling bastard! Take it! Hurry up! I can't help it!"

The spectators around, uttering dirty words,
While cursing, he threw coins and money towards the doctor with red eyes.

"Haha... It seems that the audience is already in a hurry, so let's start our operation."

"Madam, please get out of here and wait outside."

The money on the ground will naturally be collected by other people in the consulting room,
The doctor pointed to the door of the consulting room and told the peasant woman to leave,

The peasant woman trembled, put down the money in her hand, and even said yes, she left the consulting room little by little.

The old farmer, who was already carried on the operating chair, turned his head to the side, looking at his wife who was walking away with some fear of the next operation.

(End of this chapter)