The Happy Life of Small Officials in Northern Song Dynasty

"Deputy Envoy Su, don't push people too far. If you are in a hurry, I will go to your emperor's golden palace to make trouble. I don't believe that you ignore your official duties and only care about your own interests. Your emperor will let you do whatever you want. (.)" Xiao Temo threatened.

Su Jin smiled, turned around and asked the people around: "Have you ever seen such a person? There are too many strange things these days. Those who watch melons are taught a lesson by those who steal melons. When did you owe people money so brazenly and brazenly? "

Everyone laughed happily.

Su Jin asked: "I don't know how to deal with such things to be reasonable; what should you do if you encounter such a debtor who doesn't pay back?"

A guard of the Song army said: "There is nothing difficult to do. In our hometown, if anyone owes money and refuses to pay, the village owner will smash his pots and pans, and take away his house. What is there in his house? If it is worth money, it is taken to pay off the debt; there are still people who take the debtor's wife and daughter to pay off the debt."

Su Jin was surprised: "Then the government doesn't care?"

The guard said: "It doesn't matter, who told you not to pay back the debt? If you sue the officer and find out, you will have to be spanked dozens of times according to the law, and then pick up valuable things to pay off the debt. If you can't pay off, you have to work to pay off the debt." , or you can only go to prison and squat."

Su Jin clapped his hands and said: "That's a good relationship, now I have the confidence, Master Xiao, did you hear that? It seems that the laws of my Song Dynasty are not good for you; if you are sensible, hurry up and find a way to raise money to pay back." Silver, otherwise I will use valuables to pay for it. I am not greedy for your wife and daughter, as long as you can pay off the debt. Otherwise, I will send you to Kaifeng Mansion to spank your buttocks and go to prison. I heard that Kaifeng Mansion The prisoners here are very strange, they like you the most with a big beard and mighty face, and they don't know what they like you, but you will know it as soon as you enter."

Xiao Temo cursed angrily, and stretched out his hand to touch the guy in his waist, and a dozen Liao soldiers who followed into the camp also raised their weapons one after another, and there was a loud chatter for a while.

Su Jin stretched out his hand to the entrance, whistled loudly, and suddenly there was a loud noise of footsteps. Hundreds of Imperial Army soldiers came running and surrounded the tent tightly.

"It seems that Song Chao is really going to turn against Daliao with me. He is very capable and ambitious."

"Don't talk nonsense, this is a matter between you and me, what does it have to do with the court; Didn't Deputy Envoy Liu say that I will pay every dollar for what I do? That's right, as long as you pay back my money, you can go wherever you like. "

"Okay..." Xiao Temo trembled slightly, waved his hands and ordered the Liao soldiers to take back their weapons, and said, "I'll pay the debt with the horse and camel, it's over."

Su Jin said with a smile: "Isn't it so easy to settle? Of course, the livestock can pay off the debt. Please order someone to bring it up. You and I can finish the handover, and you can return to your hometown as soon as possible."

Xiao Temo chattered to a Liao soldier beside him, and the Liao soldier nodded and bowed and went out of the tent.

Su Jin sat down on a stool, and beckoned Xiao Sui'er to help her hold her shoulders, holding a teacup in her hand and looking irritatingly foolish, Xiao Temo hated her so much that her teeth itch, but there was nothing she could do.

After a while, the horse was taken outside the tent, Xiao Temo said coldly: "Deputy Envoy Su, the horse is outside the tent, you go and get it, and we will settle the matter."

Su Jin stretched out his hand and said with a smile: "Master Xiao, please first, let's make a transfer outside the account."

A group of people came out of the tent, and the sky had gradually cleared up. After the rain stopped, the colorful clouds reflected the western half of the sky red like blood, and the air was much fresher and more refreshing. <After the rain, the blue sky is like washing, the scene is so beautiful that I want to write a poem. "

Fu Bi almost didn't laugh, this kid tried his best to make Xiao Temo angry, but Xiao Temo was so tolerant, he pretended not to hear, and showed no signs of attack, which was very different from his mighty appearance match.

"Where are the horses? Where are they?" Su Jin set up an awning to look around, completely ignoring the seven or eight war horses lined up beside him.

Knowing that he was pretending, Xiao Temo had no choice but to grit his teeth and hold back, pointing to the horses and said: "Deputy Envoy Su's eyesight is not so good at such a young age, isn't it?"

Su Jin turned his head to look, pointed at the horses and said, "Why, this is it?"

Xiao Temo frowned and spat: "Vice Envoy Su, we have no grievances or enmities, why do you have to be so pretentious and teasing, the mountains will not turn around, maybe one day you, Vice Envoy Su, will fall into my hands, I advise you to keep a note for yourself. back road."

Su Jin nodded and said: "What you said seems to make sense. You are telling me that after your Liao cavalry go south in the future, I will not escape your palm."

Xiao Temo said: "It's up to you to understand, the horse is here, you return the IOU to me, and we're done."

Su Jin pointed at the horses and shook his head and said: "Where are these horses? This is clearly a deer worth a few taels of silver. Just these seven or eight skinny deer want to lower me by 1 yuan." A debt of two silver? Master Xiao’s family must be in business, and he is so shrewd, I admire him; it’s a pity that I am not being taken advantage of.”

Everyone was stunned, and even the soldiers on the Song side felt that Deputy Envoy Su was a bit of a mess. They were obviously eight high-quality Khitan horses, each of which was worth at least a thousand guan. The meat of the elk was gone.

Fu Bi laughed to himself, Zhao Gao from Qin called a deer a horse, but this master is good, calling a horse a deer; at the same time, he secretly worried, when will the end of such nonsense, even if Xiao Temo insisted on not paying back the money, how could he still pay the money back? Can he kill it?I don't know what Su Jin was thinking, but yesterday they had a good discussion about using some means to deter Liao envoys, could it be such lazy means?

Xiao Temo's endurance had reached its limit, and he cursed loudly: "You are really lazy, don't think that during your Song Dynasty transit, I let you do whatever you want, you have the ability to order someone to cut me off , why bother to play these tricks that are not on the stage to disgust this envoy?"

Su Jin smiled and said, "Master Xiao, don't get angry. Is it really a horse? Then you swear that it is indeed a horse, and I will believe you."

Xiao Temo spat and said: "I swear by your mother, grandpa will not serve you anymore."

Su Jin sneered and said, "If you curse again, I'll send you to the jail in Kaifeng Mansion to sell your ass."

Xiao Temo stared at Su Jin like a hungry wolf, but he never dared to curse again.

Su Jin turned around and asked, "Who of you knows the price of a horse? How much is a horse like this with long fur and short legs like a grass donkey worth?"

Someone replied: "The market price of a fine Khitan stallion can reach about a thousand."

Su Jin scolded: "That's the price of a fine Khitan horse. What the emissary is asking is the price of these poor horses."

The soldier couldn't get his head around, and was about to say: "My lord, this is a fine Khitan horse." Before he could speak, someone covered his mouth, and someone immediately answered for him: "The price of a bad horse is not as good as that of a cow. A few bad horses are worth a hundred or so at most."

Su Jin frowned and said, "One hundred guan? It's enough for a common people's family to live for five years. How can such a bad horse be worth so much?"

Xiao Sui'er heard the string song and knew the elegant meaning, suddenly said: "I know, I know."

Su Jin was very happy, the little girl was a bit stage frightened, she even endured the silence until now, this time she finally understood.

"You talk about it."

"The maidservant's cousin is a horse dealer. The maidservant grew up in his family, so he knows some prices. Generally, the characteristics of a good horse are: the head is like a shuttle, the neck is like a bow, the hair is like oil, the skin is like satin, The hooves are like iron, the hips are like knives... The little servant girl sees that these horses don't match in any way, so they are out-and-out bad horses."

Su Jin almost lost her breath without laughing, this girl didn't know what she had learned, probably more than half of it was made up, but she made it up smoothly.

"Little baby, don't talk nonsense, my good Khitan horse's rough coat is the result of being polished to keep out the cold, the stubby legs are the result of endurance, and the hair is messy because it has not been groomed. Besides, what's the use of a beautifully combed hair? It's nothing but fancy."

Xiao Sui'er retorted crisply: "This bearded official, I'm not here to argue with you, I'm just telling you what I know, you don't have to express your opinion in such a hurry."

Su Jin smiled and said, "Don't pay attention to him, how much money can this bad horse sell for?"

Xiao Sui'er wrenched his fingers and said: "The poorer the horse, the more edible it is. It has a big appetite, a big temper, but weak strength. Not to mention it can't run and ride, even pulling a cart and plowing land is not as good as a big green mule; this kind of bad horse is the most Twenty strings for one horse, even the little servant girl thinks it's worthless, and it's just a waste of food."

Su Jin raised his big finger and said: "Finally, I met someone who knows the goods, and I was almost deceived; Lord Xiao ordered you to have a horse with 20 taels, so you need 490 horses for [-] taels." , Here are eight horses, you can get another [-] two horses, we can finish the delivery, and you can take it away, and we will never violate the river water from now on."

Xiao Temo wanted to die, now he met a rascal, he always thought that he was shameless and despicable, but this tired and lazy boy in front of him was ten times, no, a hundred times more shameless than himself!No!thousand times.

At the end of Xiao Te's blood surged up, he couldn't hold back his fiery temper, secretly thinking whether he should stretch out his hand and wring the boy's thin neck off, but on second thought, the picture would soon bring about a catastrophe, I can only hold back forcibly.

"It seems that Master Xiao can't get more than 400 bad horses to pay off the debt. I remember that you seem to have only a hundred or so livestock in total, and the equivalent of silver taels is only more than 2000 silver. How to pay off the rest?" Su Jin scratched his head.

Xiao Temo sneered and said, "What should we do in your opinion?"

Su Jin pondered for a while with a sad face, and suddenly said: "Yes, the weapons and armor of your Liao soldiers are also novel, especially your big mace, which looks like pure iron, but it is worth a few dollars. How about You put your armor, horses, carts and your scrap metal weapons together as a price. Although it is still a bit worse, I will do it anyway. A poor jingle man."

Xiao Temo let out a loud roar, and stretched out his hand to grab Su Jin's neck. The Chao Dynasty at the side quickly parried Xiao Temo's heavy grip, and pulled Su Jin back quickly.

Xiao Temo didn't hesitate any more after he had already started, he roared a few times, more than a hundred Liao soldiers' personal guards rushed up quickly and wanted to fight forcefully, seeing that a scuffle was about to break out.

At this moment, there was a loud 'bang', thick smoke billowed up, and a small bag of soil beside the tent exploded, splashing mud and rocks, covering everyone's heads and faces.

Everyone stopped in astonishment, only to see Su Jin holding a black pipe with green smoke in his hand, and shouted in his mouth: "Whoever takes a step forward, I will blow his head off!"