A Guide to Rehabilitation of Broken Love in the Cultivation World

Chapter 50
As expected, on the night when I learned that Susu and Song Wen would leave the realm of self-cultivation and go to the ancient secret realm to continue cultivating, I suffered from insomnia again.

Lying in bed, tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep.

As always, I am troubled by the hallucinations that appear in front of my eyes or ears from time to time, but this time, in addition to the pain and regret that have been with me for more than two months and have never left me, I also began to feel a sense of a new emotion.

——unwilling.

At the beginning, this sense of unwillingness was still very small, like a small dish of appetizers before a meal, or cherries on top of a cake.

But gradually this sense of unwillingness began to spread in my chest, like a cancer, rapidly spreading to every corner of my body at an irresistible and terrifying speed.

It's not that I'm still fantasizing about getting back together with Susu one day, even if I'm as dull as I am, I know that this relationship has completely cooled down.

Even if the stove is set up, and the flames are raised, and the heat is kept on it, the best it can do is to cook and become delicious and juicy, and it is impossible to bring it back to life.

What makes me feel unwilling is that Susu... chose to give up on me.

It's as if I have been stamped and identified in my life.

This makes me so unwilling!

I know now more than ever I have reason to give up on myself.

I just lost the love of my life, forever, to a perfect man who was far superior to me in every way, a real winner in life, and usually, wounds of this magnitude never heal.

Not to mention that my studies and interpersonal relationships are also in a mess. The only thing I should do now is to put my tail between my legs, retreat into my dark and damp burrow, close the door and complain to myself, look at my shadow, and weep silently until dawn, tearing up Heart-cracking cries that no one will love me anymore.

But if I just continue to sink like this, let myself be immersed in boundless sorrow, achieve nothing, and spend the rest of my life in a daze, then in the future, when Susu and Song Wen are successful in their cultivation, they will tie the knot and have a happy life. Family and enviable career, hand in hand with each other, spend a wonderful and splendid life together.

Then one day, their children suddenly asked them about the past when they were young, and Susu would smile and talk about this young relationship with me, with a calm expression and no regrets, as if it was a must before leading to happiness The twists and turns and tribulations experienced.

The whole meaning of their existence is to let the protagonist in the story make the right choice and embrace sunshine and true love.

And this really bothered me.

When I think of this scene, my heart is filled with inexplicable anger.

This anger is not aimed at Susu, or Song Wen, but at myself.

Because I knew that all of this was caused by myself, and it was my self-willedness and meddling that made Susu's prophecy come true bit by bit.

Let her say to herself calmly after a few years, "Look, I didn't do anything wrong when I gave up on him back then. I saw him through early on."

No, I don't want her life to be so full.

Don't get me wrong, I still love her, past, present, and future... Even if we are destined not to be together forever, I still sincerely thank her for the love she gave me, and wish her the best after leaving me. Have a happy life.

However, that life cannot be too perfect.

I hope that even if she has a successful career, a harmonious family, and full of children and grandchildren, she will still be confused in the dead of night, whether she made the right choice back then.

Ask yourself over and over again, but never get the answer.

Until it becomes her heart knot and eternal regret.

It became a secret that she buried deep in her heart until she died and would not share it with others.

It's like a ghost hovering above her head, her ghost is lingering, whenever her life is not going well, she will jump out from time to time, make a grimace, and then float away unhurriedly.

This will be my tenderest and cruelest revenge on her.

Yes, I don't want to be a nameless mob responsible for providing experience on her way to level up, but to be an ending B that she will never reach.

I want to defeat Song Wen!I'm not kidding, though I've found that falling out of love has improved my sense of humor significantly.

But this time I meant it, as the sun was about to rise over the distant horizon, and in the last darkness before dawn, that was the only thought I could think of.

It was so powerful, so strong over all the pain and sorrow, all the regret and depression that had been dragging my life down.

I swear that I will swallow that handsome, gentle and sunny boy alive, and completely defeat him!

From soul to body.

In order to do this, I need to complete self-reconstruction first, pick up my broken heart piece by piece, stuff it back, and insert it into the dark hole in my chest, let it beat again, and give it another needle The bloody wounds all over my body were stitched up one by one.

This process can be very painful.

But it doesn't matter, pain and anger are the best nourishment, I need them to provide me with a steady stream of forward momentum.

Insomnia also didn't bother me anymore, instead it became my help, allowing me to have more time than others, like a sudden superpower.

This is actually a bit of cheating, and it makes me feel embarrassed.

Most importantly, I finally found my purpose in life and I am no longer lost.

The previously chaotic and incomprehensible world suddenly became clearer than ever before my eyes, like an old village chief with a white beard standing outside my door with a huge yellow exclamation mark on his head.

When I walked towards him, he said, "Hello, Brave, your first task is to pass the graduation exam in July, to ensure that your final score can be in the top ten, so that you can stay in Qingyunzong to continue your studies." Qualifications... What are you doing in a daze, move quickly! Take the novice equipment I gave you!"

After listening to his words, my gaze fell to the long sword that I threw in the corner.

Because it has not been used for a long time, it has been covered with a layer of dust, and there are even cobwebs on the side.

I remembered what the person who gave me this sword had said.

He said that the name of the sword is Qingyun.

Because he hopes that the new owner of this sword will be poor and strong, and not fall into the blue sky!

I got up, walked in front of it, stretched out my hand, held the hilt of the sword, and slowly pulled it out of the scabbard.

Qingyun also groaned softly, as if he was rejoicing at seeing the sun again after a few months.

I stroked its body, and my thoughts drifted back to those days when I was still in Qinglian Sword Garden.

Life at that time was very boring. Apart from eating and sleeping, I basically spent all the rest of my time cultivating, repeating every move tirelessly.

I had hoped that such days would end soon.

But when it's really over, gone forever, I can't help but start to miss it, yes, those days were boring as hell, I won't deny it, but at the same time they were extremely fulfilling.

And it's simple.

At that age, right and wrong, love and hate are very clear.

You only need to do one thing well every day, and that is to practice swords.As long as you practice your sword well, the long sword in your hand will reward you generously.

When I held Qingyun again, I seemed to hear my long-silent heartbeat again.

I heard Qingyun whispering in my ear.

It said, come on, let's have a big fight!

If you really hurt so much that you can't breathe, you don't care about anything, and you want to kill yourself countless times, then why don't you choose to burn with me!

Rather than lying on the ground like mud, no one cares about it until it rots and stinks, it is better to burn it.

Even if turned into ashes, at least it once illuminated this cold and silent night, even if it was only for a short moment.

Maybe they can set this fucking world on fire together! ! !

(End of this chapter)