endless roses

Chapter 49

I was trying to remember things related to letters, but I got off the track. I am in my prime, a classmate and a teenager, and I haven’t done things about memories for a long time. This article is inspired by a regretful little note, which reminds me of those talented friends of mine. .

After the final exam of the first year of high school, I mustered up the courage to hand a small note to someone.At the beginning of Ouyang Xiu's creation of "Drunkard Pavilion", he wrote all about the state of the strange mountain. There are more than 100 characters, but all of them were deleted later, leaving only a sentence "Huan Chu is all mountains", because he didn't write it in the first place. Shan's means concise and to the point.The original text has a meaning, and I don’t remember the specific content and the following sentences, so I also said directly, “You are one of the boys I think is the best besides my father.”Haha, it's fun to use "one" and "one". I don't know if it's a love letter or not.If I don't ask, I also cut off the way for people to answer. It should be just a hazy feeling.

I don’t have a deep impression of that person. Lin Yutang’s Su Dongpo Biography borrowed it from him. After class, he often turned around to chat and asked me about various subjects. The story of historical relics is very gentle.Homework is handed in from the back to the front in the evening self-study, so he and a group of classmates often see the poems I wrote in the corners of those test papers, some are silent, some are improvised by myself, lawyers or prose sentences are all Quite a few, and occasionally it will cause a small discussion among students.I didn't want to let people know, but I wrote it when I thought of it at that time. There will be a lot of tiny words on the textbooks, notes, and even the steam eye mask packaging bags that were torn open at night and not thrown away.If he is willing to read, I am willing to write. One day I changed Zhang Ruoxu's "Moonlight Night on the Spring River" into a boudoir poem (the order is the order of the original text, and the words were mentioned in it, and the last attempt to restore it was unsuccessful). He is the first readers.Later, why did I feel that I liked him? Because of the smirk of the deskmates around me, she said to me, "Look at him, he turns to talk to you after class, and only talks to you, a girl", and the other she Say "I think you are a good match", and listen to these gossips, um, yes.The most important point is that I think youth "should" have a small love affair, and it is the most wonderful thing to end with regret.So after the whole process, I ran away after I gave him the note. Let me tell you, that part was very fun. He followed behind and would probably say something, so I just ran out of the school gate and left without a trace. .

One night before the college entrance examination, I was picking out crispy noodles in a small supermarket outside, and I was hesitating which flavor to choose, and I happened to meet him.My hand is still on the instant noodles haha, it’s so embarrassing, I can’t put it on it, I can’t hold it, my eyes just stare at the front and don’t turn left.This guy asked, how are you (a bit like a reunion in an idol drama for many years), and then we walked and chatted together, and suddenly felt that if we hadn't slipped so fast back then, there seemed to be something going on.But at the beginning of this paragraph, I went with regrets. Youth should be like this, which is very wonderful.

I always walk alone, lazily and accidentally walked into this dream school of many parents and students, and didn't ask the parents to spend any effort and money.In the beginning, my grades were acceptable, and I was a bit high-spirited. My friends said that I always liked to smile, and I smiled very warmly, but I kept a distance from everyone and would not be intimate.

Thinking about the best part, I had a group of really good friends in Cardamom Nianhua, they were knowledgeable, brilliant and very personal, but every year the class would be disrupted, I'm not good at socializing, somehow I went to find them, not like in When you are together, you can naturally gather together to chat and play.

Die Er has been in the first and second grades all year round, and then went to study physics.It was she who recommended me to start reading Jostan. The restless dwarf in "The Secret of Cards" once made us fear and miss for a long time.She often mentioned "that little devil" in her composition for a while, and I also hated that buffoon who would make bells and torture people's souls when he walked. Before going to sleep, he would always unconsciously look at the window on the door. Are you staring at me.Later, there was "Maya", which I didn't start reading until a long time ago, so when she asked me to talk about this book and found that I just read it for reading notes, I was probably a little disappointed.Later, the biggest shock to me from this book was "Destruction". The motto in the book is "It takes tens of billions of years to create a person, but it only takes a moment to destroy it."I have read articles about planetary annihilation and black hole specials in Scientific American, and I know that there is an essential difference between it and dissipation, annihilation, etc., that is, it disappears cleanly, not the white land, but something There is nothing left, a real barrenness.

During the exam, the political teacher told us that this time the top few will write a movie, and we will play it in the next class after voting.Die Er’s Three Idiots Wreak a Havoc in Bollywood, Xiao Sa’s Titanic, and I’m Frankenstein. Xiaocheng didn’t do well in the exam and told me a lot of things I didn’t listen to.The style of painting was wrong later on. A classmate suggested a Japanese horror film "The Grudge". As a result, the class was as violent as beat beats, shouting "The Grudge, the Grudge..." So she went to the next class. Show us this film.

When that horrible face with no white eyes emerged from the girl's belly, there was a little cheer in the class. I was doing my homework helplessly, but Die Er walked up to me and said: Let's go downstairs to the flower stand Review it there.These four or five people "skip class" and went to a promenade by the lake to read.I still remember the long corridor, the white hollow design, wrapped with wisteria, like a flower stand for a wedding.It was a good time and the sun was shining, and four or five of us were looking at geography and discussing latitude and longitude and slope.

Xiaocheng's father is a math teacher and has been at the same table for several months.At the beginning, I didn't care much about the things around me, even if I had been around for a week or two, I didn't care about his name.One day, I didn't know what was wrong, and he suddenly asked me: "Zhou Xiaomei, don't you still know my name?" Ben later said, I know you are xxx, he was a little suspicious but couldn't say anything.I’ve never lost my temper with others, but this guy said that his method for that math problem is easier, obviously my answer is better and shorter, so I started arguing, voice When Die Er and Xiao Sa got a little older, they gathered around to watch the excitement, and everyone laughed.

Originally, my solution was better, with fewer steps.

One thing he hates very much is that he always lifts people's bangs.There were two girls who came outside after class, and asked at the window: Are you a small town? The answer was yes, and those girls bouncing around said "so handsome, so handsome", and he blushed. My stomach hurts from laughing next to me.There was a math test paper, he had a fever and only 73 at the end of the test, I was sitting beside me with a full score and looked relaxed, this guy pressed the test paper under his arm and fell on the table and shed a tear or two, a man has tears not lightly Play, and soon play again.But I was like last year or the year before. When my friend was sad, I was at a loss. I didn't know how to say "I'm here" or "Don't cry, you're fine", even though I had all kinds of feelings in my heart, I hoped that my friend could feel it.We were not in the same place in high school, only knowing that the grades went downhill.

In the afternoon when I was [-] or [-] years old, I was still at the same table. Sometimes he would put his head on my shoulder, but many people on the shoulder pushed away with heavy heads.After several times, it will be dealt with as usual.Only once, Xiaocheng put his hand lightly on my jawbone and turned to him. I was so innocent that I didn’t know what to do, so I looked into this guy’s eyes stupidly, and he looked at the same way. After a few seconds, Xiao Sa let out a smirk and ran away. Come here and tell me what you two are doing.

Maybe it was the hazy feelings of a teenager. After all, he was still very young at that time, and he only felt warm and soft when he recalled it.

Xiao Sa, just finished reading Husseini's "The Mountains Echo", the book was placed on the table and was seen by him, he said that there was another "Kite Runner", and the two exchanged it; from the book Jiao took a copy of Dan Brown's Angels and Demons. When he saw that I was reading it, he said that many plots in this book were not suitable for girls, so I not only finished reading it, but also read the complete works of Dan Brown."Life and Death Fatigue" and "The Master is More and More Humorous" in the book corner are owned by a classmate surnamed Yang (Yang later starred in the school's English drama Ruhua, and he ordered a big black mole that could not be washed off for several days haha). I read the book of life and death, and in the part where Ximen is troubled, Xiaocheng and that little Sa started to laugh badly, "Tell you, don't read chapter xx of Mae Mae, it's super pornographic, we It’s inappropriate to read all of them.” So I found Mo Yan’s six or seven books to read after I finished.Once I ran into him buying a copy of the answers for the winter vacation homework. I was surprised that such a top student would copy it. He said that this thing is not worth the time.Haha, the heat is not enough, I don’t do my homework during the winter vacation, if I really want to check it, I just write it out, it’s faster than reading the answer.

Xiao Sa later went to Nanjing, I think he was a little frustrated.At that time, our parents asked each of them about their aspirations. Die Er said that she wanted to do some literature work, and Xiao Sa said that she wanted to be a researcher. I was debating whether to choose the former between changing the college entrance examination papers or becoming a poet.

The most memorable scene was a dusk near the end of the second year of junior high school. He borrowed my blue book "Notre Dame de Paris", leaning against the white stone railing outside the classroom and concentrating on it. He leaned on the stone railing to read a book under the setting sun. teenager.The elder said that if someone wanted to stay in his class, he could speak. I thought I would not leave, so I didn’t go. This is something I regret very much.

Later, everyone passed the No. [-] Middle School, but the liberal arts building, the science building, and the buildings were far apart. I went to the classroom after six o'clock and returned to the dormitory after eleven o'clock. I almost cut off communication. I didn't know how to communicate with others speak.Dieer met me once, and it was a few years before I officially talked about the Maya and many others. I always think she is the soul-stirringly beautiful heart.

One evening self-study, I met Chowder, who was also my tablemate after Xiaocheng.A very naive guy, in that English drama he played Mrs. Hua in "Tang Bohu Spots the Autumn Fragrance", with purple costumes and beaded hair.Die Er played another "lunatic" who was about to enter Washington in the scene where Bo Hu trampled Xiaoqiang to death, with disheveled hair and clothed clothes, and the fierce push at Bo Hu's handsome classmate, which directly changed her past soft image. Refreshed, and the little boy I borrowed a few books, he acted like a flower, Bohu patted his shoulder, and when he slowly turned his head and said the phrase "what's the matter?", really Laughed to death haha, I am the hostess at the entrance, smiling at the students who enter.Chowder's grades are average, but he is very interesting, and there are also some annoying points. When everyone watches movies, he always spoils!Spoilers for every episode!At first I wanted to talk to him, but he didn’t agree to shut up and said it’s all right, and then he continued, “Look, everyone, this dog is about to pee on its own (fake god)” and “Is the house still alive? Already (Flying House Travel Notes)"...

When I was in high school, I knew that he had repeated his studies, and later he was admitted to the science class A of our school, which was pretty good.One day, when I came back from shopping for dinner before self-study, I saw him chatting with a few juniors (our school uniforms can distinguish grades), more than ten meters away, maybe 20 meters away.Long time no see, I waved to him, and he waved to me, and the hands of the latter two slowly fell.

The most brilliant and beautiful time in my life was when I was thirteen or fourteen years old and spent the second year of junior high school with these friends. After class, everyone gathered in a circle and read my new issue of Global Science and Overseas Digest, so Many years later, I still love these two magazines; there are also books that have been passed on to countless hands; Xiaocheng asked why he had to recite the preface to the Tengwang Pavilion, and I answered my father to check; on the 800nd, I went to the small store to get readers and they borrowed them; Xiao Sa collected the hair of each of us and made a booklet, and also wrote comments, his composition on the erhu and the piano music he played in the auditorium; Maybe it was just a pen, so she reluctantly told me that there was still [-] yuan left; after the first batch of joining the group meeting, everyone asked me how I felt, and the phrase "feeling honorable" that came out of my mouth (I was poisoned by my father, too simple ); go to listen to writers coming to school to talk nonsense together; everyone secretly chatting in class... That is not youth, but beautiful boyhood, and there is no comparison after that.

Before the college entrance examination, I didn’t live as idle as I used to. Although I still often skipped classes and went out to relax, the teacher was also very good, but I was required to report in advance every time I went out, or write a note to tell me where I was going and when I would come back.In the third year of high school, I was ranked in the twenties and thirties of liberal arts. If nothing else, I should be in Nantah University. I also have higher goals in mind, but I don’t seem to be worthy of being Haizi’s classmate.Afterwards, I resolutely re-studied. That year was also good, and it was relatively loose, but because it was a re-study training institution affiliated to the school, most of the students came from all corners of the country. It is inevitable that many strange things will happen.This year, I also had a friend, a lively, beautiful and big-hearted friend who often skipped classes for walks and took good care of me, but they were not close friends after all.We are very good little sisters, we have fun and chat together, share our life and thoughts, and occasionally compete with each other. Her name is Su, and our combination is "US-Soviet Fight for Hegemony".I still failed the rankings, a little tired, and couldn't move anymore.

It seems that I think these people are very gentle and beautiful. I told Fang Xue a story about ghosts a while ago, and she said, maybe a long time ago, in a certain era, I would also be in the dream of a ghost.Maybe, maybe I also walked through someone's brilliant day.But why do most of my memories always walk alone, always rushing from one place to another, or walking very slowly and aimlessly, all I can do is stare blankly, with blank eyes and empty eyes , thoughts drifted far away.During the evening self-study, while writing homework, I suddenly heard the conversation between Wang Xifeng and Xinger, or I suddenly fell into a dream but the pen in my hand was still writing, and my consciousness was blurred and then sober.My friends will comfort me. Their parents sometimes bring me meals. When I am sick, my classmates or other parents’ parents will come to greet me and bring ointment. .But the language of these people also has a sense of confusion, as if it has nothing to do with me. I have never cared much about promises, care, and comfort...

Delicate and redundant.

Alas, so is character.Too much delicacy will bring more happiness, more burdens, so many lingering times, so many roads alone, tempered over and over again into the general sadness of today, always looking sad and not Specific events, always warm and suddenly intoxicated and no specific events.Even now, it is warm.But usually quite skinny, it seems a bit unrestrained.

I wanted to buy an ice cream, but the evening wind is a bit chilly, so let's go back early and make some coffee or milk powder in the dormitory.When I got near the Conservatory, I was still listening to a soft French piece with a soft female voice, and I heard the sound of a piano coming from outside.There are piano sounds on both sides, so I stopped between the buildings and listened quietly. The piano sound on the left is dark, and the right is scattered and bustling.

4/23

(End of this chapter)