Siren Blade

Chapter 15 Disillusionment
The devil Li Duo.

The moment this title sounded from the mouth of the blue bird, I actually felt that the voice seemed to be shot out of her mouth as an invisible sharp sword, piercing my chest with lightning speed, passing straight between the ribs, One blow crushed my heart to pieces.I took two steps back reflexively, almost fell to the ground, my mouth was open, and my mind was chaotic.

She... what did she just say.

She said what did I do...

I'm not unprepared.Since the devil symbolizes me in reality that I cannot face, and the devil has the setting of a crazy murderer in my dream, then... Maybe I am not a decent person in reality, this possibility It's not that I haven't thought about it...

But this is a dream, and the memory in reality will be presented in a distorted and magical form in the dream.I can't face myself in reality, even if I become a murderer who has committed numerous crimes in a dream, it doesn't mean that I must also be a murderer in reality.Or it may simply be that I have committed petty crimes in real life, and that my moral sense, tormented by the day, expresses itself in my dreams in uncanny forms at night; Because the disease made me feel that my life was in danger, I imagined my sick body as a murderer who strangled my soul, and it was distortedly reflected in my dream...

However, the "devil man Li Duo" described by Qingniao himself reveals between the lines the madness and depravity that even the "devil man" in the dream cannot match.

Such an evil person...is...me?
I don't want to believe it, want to tell myself it's a hoax.But there seemed to be small voices whispering in the corners of consciousness.It was as if when I saw the devil for the first time, there was a voice in my heart screaming and accusing the devil of its evil and darkness; now, this voice agrees with the blue bird's accusation against me in a low voice.

"Why..." I recited unconsciously, while the blue bird stared at me without saying a word.This staring gaze seemed to have substantial power, to dig into my flesh and explore the structure inside.But I also understand that her gaze is not malicious, it is just my consciousness creating such an illusion for myself.It was me who wanted to dig open my own flesh to see what color of blood was flowing inside.

I reinjected strength into my voice, and continued to ask the unfinished question, "...Why do you want to treat me? Since I am this kind of criminal, and the Security Bureau is an organization that deals with criminals..."

She paused for a moment, then asked, "Do you remember the 'Devil's Past' I told you about?"

One day, a person who used to live an ordinary life went to a mysterious place that no one could find, and found a monster that no one knew in the mysterious place.

When he discovered the monster, the monster also discovered him.

Then, the monster bewitched his mind and made him lose all human reason.

"...after we eliminated the monsters and captured the devil, we were shocked to find that the devil Li Duo was different from the maddened devil we imagined. What a heinous crime. To have him commit so many crimes, even if it is just one of them, is not as good as killing him. Unless his psychology is different from ordinary people from the bottom of the structure, otherwise he will not be able to deceive the psychological appraisal of the Security Bureau " She said, "After anatomical research, although we found that the monster was different from all known monsters, we can conclude that it has a very strong talent for hypnosis, brainwashing and body transformation. After many rigorous investigations and meetings After that, we finally came to the conclusion that Majin Lido was the victim of the monster's mental manipulation, not the perpetrator."

"You... just let the real me go like this?" I said incredulously, "Even if I was hypnotized and brainwashed, or something else, and caused so many casualties, didn't I get the death penalty?"

"The hidden world also has the laws of the hidden world. Although there are some dissatisfied voices within the Security Bureau, as an organization that governs order, we give priority to the law." She said, "In reality, you have huge concerns about your past. Guilty, you insist that you have not been hypnotized and brainwashed, that you committed all the crimes voluntarily, and asked the Security Bureau to impose the death penalty on you. In order to help you return to society, we decided to give you psychological treatment, the other It turned out to be this dream."

She glanced around, "We divided you into two parts, you who still maintain a clean conscience, and the devil who is the opposite... According to the original calculation, your power is far stronger than the devil, The Siren Blade is also your weapon. But after the dream is implanted with a vicious factor by the inner ghost, the power relationship is reversed. You become an ordinary person through and through, and the demon has all the power, even the Siren Blade .”

"So...why didn't you tell me?" I asked, "You didn't tell me at first, because you were worried that I would know that this was a dream, which would make the dream even more out of control. But after I found out that this is a dream, why do you still hide the devil What about your relationship with me?"

She was silent for a while, her eyes and expression slowly relaxed, "Because... I think this is a good opportunity."

"good chance?"

"You should stay in your dream, Li Duo." Her voice became kind, "How cruel you are in reality, and how cruel reality is to you...Even if you go back, nothing good will happen until At the moment of death, you will continue to torture your heart, and finally close your eyes in the torment. This is...too cruel for you."

"I..." I didn't know how to answer her.

"But here, everything is different." She said softly, "Five years ago, you were finally found by the search and rescue team. Although some unpleasant memories happened, it was just an unlucky spring outing. After that, In the peaceful and warm days, you study hard, go to school, and find a decent job in society; or just like what you said before, you can also become a demon hunter here, fighting against those unforgivable crimes The villain and the monster, and finally the hero you dreamed of among flowers and applause. When you die, you are satisfied because you have done nothing to be ashamed of your heart."

She paused slightly, and then said, "More importantly...you will return to your own, normal life track."

Her soft words seemed to be a series of numbing currents that turned into tiny chains and wrapped around my heart.And how beautiful the future she described is, I have no reason to reject her.

Undisguised and violent footsteps came from a distance, it was the demon who was approaching here rapidly.It seems that unconsciously, I regarded the devil as an enemy that must be eliminated, so the devil also attacked me with the same mood.The blue bird turned her back without hesitation, she raised her hand and pulled a large grid from the air, and countless currents immediately gathered in one place, becoming the lightning sword in her palm.

"I will seal the devil." After she finished speaking, she turned into lightning and attacked in the direction where the devil came.

I couldn't watch her dragging her broken arm to fight alone, so I immediately summoned the Siren Blade to chase her up and attack the demon.

I fought side by side with Jade Bird again, but this time, there was no emotion in my heart, only discouragement and confusion.The strong frustration made my attacks weak and weak, and the attacks that could have hit were repeatedly blocked or avoided, while the attacks that could have been blocked or avoided fell on me logically under this trend.

The ax blade slashed mercilessly into my cheekbone.

In the midst of extreme despair and confusion, I woke up covered in cold sweat. While my eyes were wide open, I heard a familiar sound of the train broadcast in my ears:
"The next stop is 'Wu Ming Shan Station', open the door on the left, please give up the love seat to passengers in need..."

At this moment, I am on the seat of the train.The warm sunshine shines on the shoulders through the car window, and the daytime scenery outside the window flies by.

After the train arrived at the station, the door on the left opened not far away, and then fell silent.I sat in the middle of a group of dummy models, looked back from the open exit, and lowered my head wordlessly.

I used to yearn to be the protagonist in the story.

Specifically, I aspire to be a hero who punishes evil and promotes good, and I often fantasize about what I should be like after I have power.When I was rebellious in junior high school, I also became interested in the so-called evil aesthetics, and even silently agreed with some social Darwinist comments on the Internet, but in the end I found that I could not grow a hard heart.Sitting in front of the keyboard is naturally able to ruthlessly scold Fang Qiu, but it is really difficult for me to keep my face straight when facing the tears and cries that are close at hand.If I have superhuman strength, I'm more willing to use it to make people laugh.As trite and boring as that may sound, I seem to be the type to be trite and boring.

Therefore, I never thought that when I grow up, I will become an unpardonable bad person.

The world must be crazy, or rather, I am the one who is crazy.

But, in this crazy dream, all madness will be corrected.

After a while, the door closed automatically.The train left the station, but never announced what the next stop was.The scenery outside the car window flew away again, and became dark at a speed visible to the naked eye, and finally it was so dark that the sky could not be seen.

Where will the next stop be?Or do I never get to the next stop?
The train seems to have come outside the scope of the dream map, moving forward in the endless darkness, but because there is no reference, it seems to be stagnant.

Just like my false and incomplete memory, this dream is also false and incomplete, and it is really not a place for normal people to live in.However, even such a place full of flaws can at least allow me to escape from the cruel reality and get a temporary respite.Once I choose to break this mirror, I have to face the reality that makes me tremble with fear.

but……

However, even in this false and terrifying dream, I have heard words that are both true and warm.

——You are a person living in the ordinary world. Live cautiously, and it’s okay to lie to yourself a little bit. It’s better to run away with your back when you encounter something that is frightening from the bottom of your heart. That’s how a smart person lives.

—and you try to be honest about your fears, really, there's nothing more stupid than that.

——But I also admit that you were a bit handsome just now.

I……

I actually don't want to live so smart, and I don't want to deceive myself.

I don't want to stay in a place where lies are everywhere and memories are full of incompleteness.

If I didn't know that this place is a dream, maybe I could live a beautiful life like the blue bird said ignorantly.No, it must not be possible.Some things that I could not understand before, I can understand now.The reason why I was obsessed with revisiting the old place of the unknown mountain at the beginning, and the reason why I later ignored all obstacles and sleepwalked to the unknown mountain was because my instinct was to pursue the truth.It is useless to escape, no matter how many detours I take, I will eventually reach the nameless mountain and find my true soul.

And the devil, my sin, my soul, waits for me there.

At this time, the train shook violently.

Incomparably loud noises came from the distance in front and the distance behind. From the distance in front came the sound of non-stop destruction and crushing, while the sound from the distance behind was like thunder. roar.Both are rapidly approaching where I am.

I took a deep breath as if to swallow fear, and slowly stood up.

A black shadow and a thunderbolt pierced through from the front and rear and smashed all the dummy mannequins passing by, and arrived at the place where I was at the same time, and crashed together, and then separated in the shock wave that spread in all directions.

Thunder turned into a blue bird and landed beside me, "Li Duo!"

"I should go back." I said, while looking at the demon who fell not far away.

"Go back? Back to reality?" Blue Bird asked in astonishment, "But you can't accept your true self, you can only be happy in your dreams."

I really still can't accept who I really am, but choosing to accept or not is a decision that can only be made after returning to reality.Whether I want to continue living or kill myself after that is not up to me here to decide.In the dream, it seems that everything can be done, but in fact nothing can be done.

Although there were thousands of words in my mind, in the end, I only said one sentence, "Dreams will wake up."

I ignored her persuasion, summoned the Siren Blade, and attacked the demon.

The Majin fought back without hesitation, but I didn't retreat like before.From the moment I "perceived" that he was me, his previous skillful and heavy attacking routines became as easy to read in advance.Because the tricks he used were actually the tricks I used.He is another me.

However, the moment I saw him for the first time, at that moment, the thought in my heart was that I didn't want to face him anyway, and—whatever—I couldn't accept that there were such people in this world .

Because I think in this way, the same thinking must have appeared in his inner world like a mirror.

——In any case, it is unacceptable that there are such people in this world.

With that in mind, he killed me over and over again.

But why do I think so reflexively.The real me, this must be your voice.You also cannot forgive the devil, because the devil is your reality.

And I decided to touch my own truth.

When I made up my mind, the demon dropped his ax without saying a word, and my ax smashed his head with unabated momentum.

everything is over……

His headless body also shattered like a bubble, turning into countless black particles like a swarm of flies and swept towards me.

Darkness swallowed both my vision and my consciousness.

(End of this chapter)