This director only makes bad movies.

Chapter 253

"The garbage movie "The Hobbit", a bunch of defenses without any bright spots."

"The movie "The Hobbit" was released yesterday. As a fan of Lord of the Rings, I couldn't wait to buy a movie ticket and go to the theater to watch the movie. I am ready to enjoy a visual feast."

"But I suffered the most painful two hours in my life. I can swear that even if I fell into hell, even if I hung on a cross, I didn't suffer from watching this movie. If you dare to appear in my room at that time, James Before you, I will kick your ass hard with my boots."

"You stupid groundhog, did your mother have a super friendly relationship with wild dogs when she was pregnant, otherwise why would you be able to make such a bad movie, like a dead fish in a cesspit for 180 days .”

"This is the Lord of the Rings, the famous Lord of the Rings, how wonderful the previous movies in this series are, and what you filmed, James, is as good as Xie Te."

"Fuck, I can't help but beat up my dog ​​when I write this, because I want to show you how serious a mistake you made by beating your dad."

"The film opens with a beautiful actress hunting in the woods, and the ferocious swings so pleased my little brother that he even drools to show his excitement."

"But my brain was very dissatisfied. He wanted to take my head off and run out of the theater to protest, because the props and sets of this movie were so rubbish. I saw several goofs just at the beginning."

"Director James, I have heard your interview. You said that in order to shoot this movie, you read the novel The Lord of the Rings ten times in a row. It took three years just to prepare for the early stage of the set. Film shooting plus post-production It also took a year to make, a total of four years, and you shot such a pile of Shett?"

"In the first 3 minutes, I found more than a dozen goofy shots, more revealing than your mother's. Is this your professional attitude?"

"I won't talk about the goofy scenes in front of me. I'm just talking about the hobbits. Anyone who has seen the Lord of the Rings knows that the hobbits are a peaceful race in Middle-earth. They have superb skills and love food. Deschar is like a paradise on earth."

"But what are the hobbits in the movie? There are only seven people in total. They live in very simple thatched huts. I even saw the steel frame inside. It is obvious that they have not been built for a long time."

"The hobbits are a race with superb skills. In The Lord of the Rings, they live in a round house, are good at making food, and have bonfires every day. I don't ask you to shoot the same as in the Lord of the Rings, at least it can't be too bad , What is a hobbit with only thatched huts and seven people, did you think with your feet and then shoot it?"

"You actually photographed the Hobbit like a goblin. You were killed by a goblin in a game before, so you chose to take revenge in this way?"

"The hobbit is so ridiculous I can bear it, but what is the situation of the cannibals in the movie, where did you find the malnourished patients, the sum of eight people is not enough to beat a baby with one hand, this is the so-called ferocious cannibalism Terran?"

"Fierce and brutal cannibals, James, haven't you read a book, why don't you use your feces-filled brain to think about what a cannibal should look like."

"I can tolerate all of the above, but what I can't tolerate the most is that the dragon Smaug is a dog?"

"Wardfark, James, how many leaves did you fly? Can you believe that the legendary dragon, the fierce and brutal dragon, the dragon that can destroy a kingdom, is actually a dog!!!"

"It is clear that the dragon Smaug in the trailer is a giant dragon. The treasures he has collected for countless years can fill a city. His strength is extremely powerful. He has occupied the dwarf's Lonely Mountain Kingdom for decades, but in the end it turned out to be just a dog. .”

"As a film critic, I've seen a lot of movies that were different from the trailers, but this is the first time I've seen a movie that is completely different from the trailers."

"For other movies, the trailer may be different from the main film, but at least the shots are all taken from the movie, but "The Hobbit" is the only movie where the trailer and the content of the movie do not have a single shot. Director James , you are a shameless crime, a shameful fraud."

"I can't help but want to use my big fist to beat you into a meatloaf. If your mother is not kneeling in front of me now and begging me not to do that, I will definitely beat you into a meatloaf. I swear."

"Oh my God, Smaug the dragon is a dog, what a genius idea, what a genius idea, I can't help but want to beat you up, if it weren't for your mother's mouth Remove my anger, I have gone to you."

"If it wasn't for this being The Lord of the Rings and this being Middle Earth, I would have punched the movie to pieces."

"The rest of the movie, every minute and every second is torture, until the end of the movie, I finally get relief."

"Seeing this, I already understand why God punishes unbelievers and sends them to hell, because hell is really terrible, thank you James, my good son, you made me feel the feeling of hell in the theater."

"The whole movie, except for the fluctuation of the heroine, has no merits, whether it is the picture or the lens, the props or the plot, the actors or the music, it is equivalent to a pair that has been placed in the trash can for a hundred days and then beaten in the cesspit. Rolling stinky socks."

"Director James, The Hobbit is said to have cost hundreds of millions of dollars to produce. Why do I see such a shoddy work? How did you direct it?"

"The movie you made is so rubbish, why are you still a director, go back and sell your ass, otherwise no one will want it if it's too late."

"Don't continue to make movies in the future, or God will be angry. If you really want to make movies, then please go to hell, that's the place for you."

"Your mother is also ashamed because you made this movie. She has been persuaded by me with a big stick and decided to have another one. Thank you for your hard work, James. She really worked hard, otherwise I would have taken it with me now." The gun is coming for you."

After reading this film review, James trembled with anger, his whole body was trembling, full of anger, he picked up the water glass next to him, and threw it on the ground forcefully.

"Fack Fack Fack Fack Fack Fack."

(End of this chapter)