Guide to Traveling through the Northern Song Dynasty.

Chapter 1 0001 [Father and Son]

"bang bang bang..."

The big iron gate of the small farmyard was clattered, and the voice of the courier boy came from outside: "Brother Zhu, your courier! Brother Zhu, brother Zhu..."

"Come on, come on!"

Zhu Ming, who had just finished washing, came out to open the door with a stretched waist.

The courier boy is an old acquaintance. He stood on the side of the van, holding the edge of the cardboard box and said, "Brother Zhu, what did you buy? I can't move it by myself."

"Then it's time for you to exercise, you can't lift more than 60 catties." Zhu Ming laughed.

The courier boy said, "It's only over 60 catties? I think it's over [-] catties...Brother Zhu, the trailer is broken, please help me."

The two carried the express box and carefully put it down in the yard.

Zhu Ming immediately unpacked and inspected the goods, and the courier brother also took out his mobile phone to record.This courier is highly insured, so I'm not afraid of being damaged or broken in the middle, or being replaced by stones or bricks.

The scotch tape was cut with a utility knife, and the packing box was dismantled layer by layer, and some nails were soon exposed. Zhu Ming nodded and said, "No problem."

"Then sign for it." The courier boy also smiled.

After signing for the courier, the delivery boy didn't leave. He likes to watch strange things from Ju Ming.

Zhu Ming is a popular history blogger who makes a living by posting videos to earn traffic, and occasionally takes some advertisements to earn extra money.It may be that he is not well-known, and the quality of the advertisements he receives is not high. They are all about electric toothbrushes, self-heating hot pots, mite-removing ointments, etc., and he has not even received advertisements for krypton gold web games.

Of course, there are occasional live broadcasts.

Zhu Ming took out the shooting equipment, set it up against the express box, waited for a while, and found that there were only a dozen or so viewers in the live broadcast room—it was too early, and those who stayed up late to practice immortality hadn't woken up yet.

"Brothers, there is something good today!"

Zhu Ming held up the selfie stick, turned around and pointed himself and the courier at the camera: "The video was edited last night, and the last issue of this year will be released on time. Before going home for the New Year, we will start a live broadcast for half an hour. Let me show you my customized Heavenly King Armor...Xiaohou, help me take down the selfie stick."

"Okay!" The courier brother was very positive.

Zhu Ming took out two parts from the box, and introduced: "This is the greaves, handsome or not? The design refers to the Datong Shanhua Temple Guangmu Tianwang statue. Let's wear it first and try it out."

The greaves are matched with a pair of armored boots.

The main body of the boots is made of cowhide, and the surface is inlaid with bright silver steel plates.

Putting on the boots and greaves, Ju Ming jumped a few times on the spot, then walked back and forth, then kicked, and commented: "Not bad, not bad, it will not affect the activities, and it is very comfortable to wear."

Zhu Ming dragged out the shoulder armor from the box again, and asked the courier boy to get closer to take a picture: "Isn't this animal swallowing shoulders very handsome? When designing the armor, I listed more than ten models of heavenly kings, and I chose the most handsome one." A..."

The parts of the whole set of armor were taken out one by one, and Zhu Ming put them on one after another.

All dressed neatly, the courier boy's eyes glowed, and he said enviously, "Brother Zhu, isn't this thing quite expensive?"

Zhu Ming smiled and said, "Eighty thousand."

"Fuck!"

The courier brother immediately complained: "It's really 8 yuan, I might as well buy a full set of King Glory skins."

The number of viewers in the live broadcast room has increased to more than 60 people at this time, except for a few boasting handsome, the rest of the bullet screens are all gloating.

"Haha, I was cheated. It's worth [-] at most."

"I bought a set of Pinduoduo for 8 yuan, and the anchor's brain was kicked by a donkey."

"Stand making..."

Tianwangjia is the armor of the statues of heavenly kings in the past dynasties, and it only exists in temples, pictures, and stone carvings.The shape is indeed powerful and domineering, but it will inevitably look cumbersome to wear on the battlefield, and some handsome partial components are purely redundant.

The set Ju Ming spent huge sums of money to customize really belongs to "Pinduoduo".He copied a little bit of the Heavenly King statue from the Tang Dynasty, a little bit from the Song Dynasty King’s statue, and a little bit more from the Ming Dynasty’s Heavenly King statue, and he was charged [-] for the armor design fee alone.

Wearing the 60-pound Tianwang armor on his body, it was difficult for Ju Ming to run.

He went to the workshop, tied a sword around his waist, and came out with a long spear. He stood in the yard and said, "Xiao Hou, shoot around me."

The courier brother held his mobile phone and circled around Zhu Ming, and the barrage style in the live broadcast room finally changed.

Whether it is practical or not is not mentioned, and whether it has been tricked or not, the main reason is that this armor is so handsome, and it will turn heads [-]% when walking on the street.Just like brand-name bags for women, which man can withstand such armor?
The courier brother urged: "Brother Zhu, play two tricks."

Immediately, Zhu Ming waved his long gun and made gestures without any rules. While dancing the gun, he also dubbed artificially: "Ha, huh, ah, ah, ah, ah..."

Dancing and dancing, I was so tired that I was out of breath.

"UP Master can't do it, it's too empty, take Liuwei Dihuang Wan to make up."

"Liuwei Dihuang Wan is useless, you have to eat Wuji Baifeng Wan."

"This set of bastard guns is really tricky, and it blinded Tian Wangjia who was 8 yuan."

"..."

Zhu Ming, who was originally very happy to be handsome, immediately turned black when he saw the barrage, and began to yell at fans: "Yang Guo, do you know Yang Guo? I haven't recovered my physical strength yet!"

"Bah!"

Suddenly a horn sounded outside the iron gate, and Zhu Ming panted to open the door, but saw a brand new BMW parked at the door.

Zhu Guoxiang pushed the door and got out of the car, raised his hand to adjust his glasses, looked at his son's funny attire, and asked with a confused expression: "What are you doing?"

Zhu Ming suddenly laughed, and walked around the BMW twice: "Okay, Dean Zhu, change the car as soon as you get promoted."

"Deputy, deputy, not the dean." Zhu Guoxiang laughed.

Zhu Ming asked, "This car costs 80 million, right?"

Zhu Guoxiang said: "Low allocation, more than 40. Have you packed it? Pick up your luggage and get on the bus."

Zhu Ming said goodbye to the audience in the live broadcast room, sealed a red envelope for the courier brother, and went back to the small courtyard he rented to pack his luggage.

Zhu Guoxiang also helped his son clean up, complaining: "What kind of crappy place did you rent? I almost couldn't find it with the navigation."

"Cheap, quiet." Ju Ming explained.

Seeing his son moving the suit of armor outside, Zhu Guoxiang quickly said, "Why are you bringing this thing?"

Zhu Ming said: "If I don't take the 8 yuan with me, I will definitely lose it when I come back from the Chinese New Year. There are many thieves in this town. I stole my computer last time I went home."

"8 yuan? Are you crazy!" Zhu Guoxiang was taken aback.

Zhu Ming patted the sword on his waist: "This sword costs more than 3 yuan, all of which are custom-made high-end products."

Zhu Guoxiang scolded and said: "Playing with things and losing one's ambition, you are a prodigal."

"I didn't spend your money, I earned it myself." Ju Ming's tone was reassuring.

Hearing this, Zhu Guoxiang became even more angry: "You wanted to apply to the history department back then, and your mother and I had no objection. You couldn't find a job after graduating from college. I put down my old face and relied on connections, and finally arranged for you to enter a state-owned enterprise. They all I have already promised that I will become a full-time employee after three months of work. How many people will remain as contract workers for the rest of their lives. Fortunately, you will leave after working for a month and get paid. Why do you want to resign and engage in self-media..."

"What's wrong with the self-media? I have hundreds of thousands of fans on the whole network, and I'm going to break a million soon!" Zhu Ming immediately snapped back.

But Zhu Guoxiang said: "After a few years, how much money have you saved? To buy a second-hand broken Harvard, you still have to pay in installments!"

Ju Ming said firmly: "A second-hand broken Harvard is also a domestic car. I support domestic products, I am proud, I am proud. If you buy a BMW, you are worshiping foreigners!"

Zhu Guoxiang was pissed off by his son: "I have been driving a Poussin for more than ten years, and the traffic police will force it to be scrapped. What if I change to a BMW? Driving a foreign car is xenophiliac, so where is the Nikon camera you use to shoot videos?" Domestic products?"

Zhu Ming couldn't refute for a moment, he could only blame the domestic brands for not being up to date, but then he insisted: "BYD's electric car is good, you should change to that one."

Zhu Guoxiang turned his head to look at the BMW logo, and said to himself: "Your mother wanted to buy a BMW when she was alive, and she went to see the car at that time, and suddenly she was found to have a tumor."

After hearing this, Zhu Ming stopped talking and buried himself in moving things.

Zhu Guoxiang didn't seem to want to talk about this, so he said in a very abrupt and emphatic tone: "You are almost 30, and you stand at [-]. You don't have a stable job, and you haven't saved much money. How can you stand at the age of [-]? Which one?" Would you like to marry your girl? Listen to me, if you want to find a job after the Chinese New Year, if you really like self-media, you can do it in your spare time. I have spent half my life doing it, and I have nothing else. The face is still useful, here it is It's okay to arrange work..."

"Stop, stop, I hate nepotism like you the most," Zhu Ming dragged his armor to the rear of the car, and ended the conversation, "Open your trunk!"

The father and son had a tacit understanding and changed the content of the conversation in their own ways.

Zhu Guoxiang opened the trunk, which was full of things.

Zhu Ming said speechlessly, "What's the matter?"

Zhu Guoxiang said: "The New Year's goods for relatives in my hometown, your uncles and aunts, each family has a copy."

"Can you make room for me?" Zhu Ming asked.

"Find out your own way," Zhu Guoxiang said.

Zhu Ming could only stuff the armor and sword on the back seat of the BMW, rubbed his hands together and said, "I'll drive."

Zhu Guoxiang said: "I drive, the BMW I just bought, I haven't had enough fun yet."

"Who cares?" Zhu Ming muttered and sat in the passenger seat.

……

The father and son took turns driving and entered Qinling Mountains after eight hours.

I slept in the high-speed service area that night, ate a bowl of Lanzhou ramen the next morning, and continued to drill tunnels in the mountains.

Waking up in the passenger seat again, Zhu Ming asked, "Where are you?"

"Just entered the boundary of Xixiang County." Zhu Guoxiang said.

Zhu Ming couldn't help complaining: "Why don't you go back by plane and high-speed rail this year? I'm exhausted driving high speed."

Zhu Guoxiang said: "I just bought a new car, and I don't usually have time to drive it. This time I went back to my hometown to enjoy my hands."

"You just went back to show off your BMW, huh." Zhu Ming rolled his eyes.

Zhu Guoxiang suddenly said: "Your mother has been gone for almost ten years. Your aunt called and said that she introduced me to someone. I can meet you when I go back during the Chinese New Year. I am 42 years old, widowed, a middle school teacher, and a daughter who is in high school. I I have to tell you, you are here..."

"I don't care," Zhu Ming teased heartlessly, "Yes, Dean Zhu. You'll be promoted, change your car, ask for a wife, and you'll be proud of yourself. You're 55 this year. Find someone in your early forties, typical An old cow eats tender grass. By the way, you are the vice president, so you can find a female student in the courtyard. She is young, beautiful, and pear blossoms... oh, oh, begonias."

"Go and go, no big or small." Zhu Guoxiang really didn't want to chat with his son, this bastard was too short-mouthed.

However, Zhu Ming laughed and said, "You think the girls in the Agricultural College have dark skin? Go to the next-door department, or the next-door school. Don't you have a film and television school there?"

"Get out! The more you talk, the more outrageous it becomes." Zhu Guoxiang's expression was unkind, but he also had fantasies in his heart.

An old colleague of his, who married a female graduate student, made Zhu Guoxiang so envious at the time.But Zhu Guoxiang is timid and cautious. He can only think about such things. It is absolutely impossible for him to attack female students.

What happened later made Zhu Guoxiang secretly think that he was lucky, but luckily he didn't mess around.

His old colleague was seriously ill and was hospitalized. He was lying in the hospital and was still alive. The second-married young wife got into a fight with the children, and a good show of fighting for family property was staged in the hospital.When the old colleague recovered and was discharged from the hospital, the children turned against each other, and there were various conflicts between the husband and wife, and the family was in chaos all day long.

At noon, eat in the service area.

Zhu Guoxiang took out his mobile phone: "Here, the photo sent by your aunt looks pretty decent."

Zhu Ming glanced at it: "It's a beautiful face, be careful of cheating."

"When it comes to asking for a wife, looks are second to none. The main thing is to be able to manage the house, and family harmony comes first." Zhu Guoxiang said.

Zhu Ming ruthlessly pierced it: "Don't talk about it, the one my aunt introduced last year, you obviously thought he was ugly."

"fart!"

Zhu Guoxiang refused to admit it: "That woman speaks too harshly, she looks like a small belly, I don't care about her appearance at all."

Ju Ming sneered: "Hehe, the final interpretation is up to you."

Zhu Guoxiang said: "Mingming, you see, I am going to get married again, should you find another one? You are almost 30 years old, and it is not a problem to be single all the time. I have a graduate student under me, who is hardworking, smart, Be down-to-earth. I asked for you, she hasn't been in a relationship yet, and her age is more suitable for you..."

"stop!"

Zhu Ming immediately interrupted: "I said why did you bring up the blind date? It turned out that you wanted to urge me to get married."

"I didn't force you, so let's talk about it first. If it doesn't suit us, we'll look for it later," Zhu Guoxiang dug out a photo from the photo album, "Look at the photo first, I haven't had a beautifier, I promise I'll look the same as a real person."

Zhu Ming objected with his mouth, but his body was very sincere. He couldn't help leaning his head towards it, and almost laughed out loud after just looking at it.

It wasn't that there was something wrong with the girl, but that Zhu Guoxiang's filming was too funny.

In the photo, a girl is carrying a hoe on her shoulders, her clothes are dirty, she is stepping on a pile of freshly harvested potatoes, and a farm machine is parked beside her.The skin is dark, the smile is bright, and it is full of joy of harvest.

People are very energetic, but it doesn't look like a blind date photo.

Zhu Guoxiang said: "How is it? Although she is not beautiful, she is definitely not ugly. Besides, the little girl has a cheerful personality and is very flattering. When she first applied to me for graduate school, I immediately fell in love with her. I want to introduce you as my girlfriend. But, you have to improve yourself, you have to find a stable job first, otherwise you won't be worthy of her..."

"Stop! Why did you say it again?" Zhu Ming was very annoyed by this topic.

"All right, all right, I won't say anything." Zhu Guoxiang put away his phone.

After lunch, and bought some snacks in the service area, the father and son returned to the car and continued on their way.

Zhu Ming put on his seat belt and drove away for a while, Zhu Guoxiang suddenly said: "Mingming, that girl's surname is Zhang, her name is Zhang Rongrong, and she is two years younger than you. Her parents are from rural areas, and she was a left-behind child when she was young. She passed the exam by herself. ..."

The father chattered endlessly, the son turned a deaf ear, and the BMW was speeding through the mountains.

"Bang bang bang..."

A series of speed bumps made the car bump up.

In a blink of an eye, I entered a long tunnel, opened and opened, and the front became darker and darker. It seemed that the lights in the tunnel were broken.

"Slow down." Zhu Guoxiang couldn't help reminding.

Zhu Ming was very obedient this time, he didn't make fun of his own life, and stepped on the brakes obediently to slow down.

In the dark tunnel, the car drove for more than 20 minutes.

Both father and son felt that something was wrong. Why is there no end to this tunnel?

"Fuck me!"

Zhu Ming burst into a foul language.

Zhu Guoxiang was also dumbfounded, because the dark tunnel suddenly became colorful, like a spinning kaleidoscope.

And the car is speeding forward in the kaleidoscope.

"Brake!" Zhu Guoxiang yelled.

Zhu Ming stepped on the brake pedal frantically: "I can't stop, the car is running by itself, what kind of broken BMW are you?"

"boom!"

I don't know how long it took, the car seemed to hit something, and finally stopped in a bright light.

(End of this chapter)