The Beacon of Kyushu

Fifteen days later, it was late at night again.

The moonlight tonight was not as bright as it was two days ago. It shone on the earth, making everything dim. If it were an ordinary person, I'm afraid they would never choose to travel at night in such weather, but the people led by Li Chongjin only dared to travel at ease on such a night.

At this moment, Li Chongjin rode on his black horse, walking majestically in the front. The evening breeze blew up his bright red battle robe, as if a ball of fire was burning in the darkness, which was particularly domineering and terrifying. The five generals under his command were each in their own position, walking outside the team, closely monitoring Wan Jianfeng in the middle of the team. Wan Jianfeng had no mount, so he had to walk forward. Fortunately, he was good at Qinggong, so he could just keep up.

The team had only been walking for a while when Wan Jianfeng complained, "Hey, Ironskin, we still have to walk for a few more days to get to Tongzhou! If it's not far away, I'll be patient, but if it's still far, you have to get me a horse, otherwise I'm staying here!"

Li Chongjin looked around and recognized that this place belonged to Huazhou. It was still nearly halfway to Tongzhou. At the current speed, it would take at least two days and one night to reach Li Ruoyun's residence. He felt a little depressed, "Wan Jianfeng, you kept yelling all the way, causing us to travel half a month to reach Huazhou. I advise you to shut up first, otherwise I will make you never open your mouth again!"

Wan Jianfeng was unconvinced and said, "Iron Skin Spirit, you are a full man who doesn't know the hunger of a hungry man! Of course you don't feel tired when riding a horse. If you have the guts, let's switch. If you can walk for two days and two nights without making a sound, I am willing to take your last name!"

The white-robed general reined in the white dragon horse under his crotch, bowed to Li Chongjin and said, "General, I think it would be better to prepare a horse for Wan Jianfeng. What do you think?"

Li Chongjin tilted his head and smiled coldly, "Why, General Xie, do you pity this Wan?"

The white-robed general hurriedly shook his head and said, "No, it's just that the emperor ordered us to escort Wan Jianfeng to Tongzhou in order to recruit Li Ruoyun. If he is too tired on the way and speaks ill of us after seeing Li Ruoyun, I'm afraid it will be inappropriate."

Li Chongjin waved his hand and said, "Canyan, you don't have to say anything! Wan Jianfeng is extremely cunning. If we really give him a horse, he will definitely take advantage of our sudden escape. If he really escapes and the emperor blames you, can you afford it?"

Not to mention that Li Chongjin's words made sense, even if he was talking nonsense, with his martial arts and power, how could Xie Canyan dare to disobey him, and he quickly kept silent. Seeing that Xie Canyan was no longer talking, Li Chongjin turned around and directed the team to continue moving forward.

But the team had only taken two steps when Wan Jianfeng covered his stomach and started to cry out again, "Ouch, ouch, it hurts... It hurts so much! Iron-skinned spirit, did you put poison in the coarse steamed bun you gave me last night? I don't think I have ever offended you except for my bad mouthing, so why did you do such a cruel thing to me!"

Li Chongjin seemed not to have heard Wan Jianfeng's shout, and he did not even turn his head, and urged his horse forward. But after walking for a while, he found that everyone seemed to be left behind by him, so he pulled the reins and turned around to look.

He saw Wan Jianfeng holding his stomach, sweating profusely, and rolling on the ground in pain, and he was shocked and suspicious. He was stunned for a moment, but still said: "Wan Jianfeng, although I can't say that I have lived an upright life, I will never do such a despicable thing as poisoning people. Besides, you have surrendered, even if I can't trust you completely, there is no need to poison you to death, right?"

Wan Jianfeng groaned and gritted his teeth, "Iron...Ironskin spirit, my stomach...my stomach hurts so much! If I go to the nearby woods and relieve myself, maybe I'll feel better. But if I continue on my way, I'm afraid I'll...I'll die of pain!"

Li Chongjin sighed impatiently and said to the white-robed general and the red-robed general: "Xie Canyan, Luo Genhuang, you two watch Wan Jianfeng go to the toilet. If he moves in the slightest, kill him!" Xie Canyan and Luo Genhuang looked at each other. Although their expressions did not change, they both cried out in their hearts that they were unlucky. But they dared not disobey Li Chongjin's order, so they could only say to Wan Jianfeng: "Mr. Wan, if you want to go to the toilet, hurry up, otherwise we don't have the patience to accompany you!"

Wan Jianfeng supported himself on the ground with his hands, slowly climbed up from the ground in pain, and clasped his fists towards the two men, "Haha, thank you Brother Xie and Brother Fan for watching me defecate! Don't worry, although I am not the fastest in the world, my farts are the stinkiest in the world. I guarantee that it will open your eyes and make your trip worthwhile!" As he said this, he ran towards the woods next to him, three points faster than a frightened rabbit.

Xie Canyan and Luo Genhuang waved to their soldiers and immediately chased into the forest, fearing that Wan Jianfeng would really run away by using the feces to escape. Fortunately, they soon caught up with Wan Jianfeng and formed a circle around him. Even if Wan Jianfeng's Qinggong was good, he would never be able to escape under the eyes of so many people.

"Thank you all for your support. I'm sorry to show you how ugly I am!" Wan Jianfeng smiled and clasped his fists to the people around him. Then he quickly squatted on the ground and untied his belt, as if he would poop in his pants if he squatted a little slower. Seeing Wan Jianfeng so embarrassed, everyone couldn't help but make fun of him.

Wan Jianfeng seemed oblivious to their words, with cold sweat pouring down his forehead and humming and ahing non-stop. But after working for a long time, he didn't even have a bowel movement, not even a fart. Seeing how hard they were working, everyone felt inexplicably anxious, as if they were the ones who couldn't have a bowel movement.

Luo Genhuang glanced at Wan Jianfeng and asked, "Boy, can you do it? Don't just thunder without rain. Our patience is very limited!"

Wan Jianfeng glanced around, waiting for a loophole to escape, and responded calmly: "I thought I was uneducated enough, but I didn't expect you to be worse than me! Didn't you hear that great poet in the Tang Dynasty wrote a good poem while he was going to the toilet?"

Luo Genhuang was stunned. "Why have I never heard of anyone composing a poem while defecating? I don't know which line it is. Please tell us about it so that we can open our eyes!"

Wan Jianfeng pressed his belly with his hand and said with a playful smile: "There is a saying that goes 'No matter how much you call for the shit to come out, it still hides the crackling sound!', which means that when you hear the crackling sound of farts, the shit will come out. Now you haven't even heard the sound of farts, but you are eager for me to poop out. Isn't that forcing me?"

Luo Genhuang was both angry and amused when he heard Wan Jianfeng tamper with the song "Pipa Xing" to such a vulgar level. He opened his mouth and was about to say something, but unexpectedly, Wan Jianfeng suddenly made a deafening "puff!" sound, followed by a foul smell that almost made him vomit.

Luo Genhuang quickly covered his mouth and nose with his hands and cursed loudly: "Wan Jianfeng, can you be a bit more humane! If you dare to stink like this again, I will block your anus!"

Wan Jianfeng chuckled and said, "General Fan, please don't make yourself sound so high-handed and otherworldly. What I do is human nature. If you don't believe me, just ask any man, woman, old or young, and see who among them has never done such a thing! But you, who are so old, still call yourself a general or a great commander. You stand in a circle and watch others defecate. This is not human nature."

Even though Luo Genhuang had been in the army since he was young, he had never heard such vulgar words. He was so angry that he raised his fork and wanted to pierce Wan Jianfeng with a hundred transparent holes. Xie Canyan hurriedly pulled his sleeve and advised: "Brother Fan, this man cannot be killed! If you kill him, how can we explain to the emperor?" (End of this chapter)