Almighty painter

Chapter 322
"The topic of our thesis is the painting picked up on the street. Perhaps at a certain moment in history, in a certain way of opening the world in a certain timeline, Ms. Carroll became Mary Steven A great name like Sen. Kessart. Whether it was the pen or the conception, we saw such potential in that old "Old Church"."

Sakai Katsuko sighed softly: "Unfortunately, those beautiful possibilities did not happen. There is no page in the history of art that belongs to her. There are no bustling queues of tourists lining up in front of the bulletproof glass in front of the art museum, using their longing words Look up to her work.”

“In the real story, what we have is just an old painting that’s been left on the street covered in dust and sold at a low price.”

There are too many bitter stories stained with blood behind the history of art. There are speculators who are good at profiteering and become famous for a while, and there are also masters who are full of brilliant pens and disappear in the vast sea of ​​people.

The best painter is not necessarily the best, and the best painter is not necessarily the best.

This is a cruel paradox left to artists by fate.

"So, Gu Jun, at the beginning of your life, why did you... pick up a paintbrush?"

Gu Weijing was stunned.

He originally thought that he was a person with firm goals and dedication to his art.

When asked by Shengzi at this time, he suddenly felt a little dazed.

What is your artistic intention?
Become a great painter.

It seems like an obvious answer.

Mr. Sloth said that children are the shadow of their parents.

His attitude towards the art of painting is very different from that of his father who went to Paris to start a new life, but their attitude towards life may not be similar.

Gu Weijing has also had these thoughts of revitalizing his family business, getting rid of the fate of poverty, and becoming a true master.

He wants him to be so enchanted that he takes pen, ink, paper, inkstone, a pot of wine and a pot of tea, and goes to the mountains and fields to be a poor hermit and an expert, just to paint his paintings well.

This kind of thing is too difficult for him.

But is what he wants just to be a successful person in the worldly sense, as simple as selling a painting for hundreds of thousands of dollars or one million dollars?

When Gu Weijing made his first $[-] and first $[-] in his life with "The Little Prince".

Looking at the entire year, maybe this number will become 100 million US dollars.

Of course he was excited and happy.

But it didn't seem that he was as excited as he imagined to the point of being unable to sleep at night.

Gu Weijing found that what he enjoyed was the sense of gain from improving his skills, the sense of satisfaction when he drew the cover painting of The Little Prince that was both physical and spiritual, and the sense of recognition that the publisher paid the $100 million check.

Money is very important to Gu Weijing, but when he saw the numbers accumulating in his account, he calmly donated it.

Sometimes it is really difficult for people to accurately distinguish what they really want, and they confuse the process of pursuit with the result of pursuit.

"At the beginning of your life, why did you... pick up a paintbrush?"

Gu Weijing followed Sakai Katsuko's voice and sank into his heart.

He remembered that when he was in the deserted ancient temple, looking at the exquisite and beautiful murals on the white walls of the Shwedagon Pagoda, he felt an uncontrollable urge to write.

I remembered my subconscious rejection and disgust when faced with the vivid promises made by Brother Hao's men and how they relied on money laundering and hype to build him into a national artist in Southeast Asia.

I remembered the heartfelt smile on his face when his grandfather Gu Tongxiang, who still had jet-black hair, held his hand and lit the first plum blossom on the paper when he was a child.

……

Gu Weijing kept sinking and sinking in the lake of his heart.

Back in time.

Scenes of his life flashed before his eyes, and the various scenes seemed like a short book that was flipped through quickly, and finally settled on the gloomy afternoon just after the Spring Festival this year.

Before he got a system that could change his life, he still chose to refuse the invitation from the underworld group.

And that... might have been the most realistic path for Gu Weijing to become a great painter in this barren land.

In the past, Gu Weijing longed for a successful career day and night.

At this moment, he suddenly realized so clearly that success was good and important, and there were still some things that were more important in his heart than wealth and social status——

He wants to be a good person and paint his paintings well. This is his biggest desire to embark on this path.

When Sakai Katsuko's fingers caressed Gu Weijing's chest, she felt the heartbeat coming from between her fingertips become soothing and long.

She felt that Gu Weijing understood.

Sakai Katsuko never thought he would hesitate and be confused before this question.

From the day-to-day interactions, from the boy's serious and calm eyes as he looked at the canvas, from his stubborn research on each word when writing the thesis, he could collect the literature, just to get rid of the string of letters "Carol". Represents the unseen historical truth of a time closer to home.

Miss Sakai already understood Gu Weijing's attitude towards art better than she did herself.

Actually,
A painter who is only obsessed with marketing himself and pursuing success utilitarianally will not be as distressed by the flowers in his paintings as Gu Weijing just did.

Only a pious person would be willing to devote such effort.

Father, like son.

Now is a good time for him to recognize himself and stop being confused.

"So Gu Jun, there's nothing to be afraid of, right? We just need to paint our own pictures well, and leave the rest alone. But do good deeds and don't worry about the future."

When every artist first picks up a paintbrush, he is a child looking at the stars in a watchtower.

When they were young, either under the guidance of their teachers or during their free time, they looked up and saw the majestic and charming art galaxy.

From then on, I have been haunted by dreams all my life.

Later, they continued to grow, take exams, sign contracts with galleries, participate in art exhibitions, and the process of climbing step by step to success and fame is like the process of constantly climbing higher on a watchtower, passing through layers of evening fog, and getting closer to the stars.

It’s just that too many people are climbing, and they mistake climbing the watchtower for the pursuit itself.

When the clouds and fog dissipated.

They were so obsessed with comparing their status on the tower that they neglected to look up and appreciate the quiet, beautiful and shocking starry sky.A painter will encounter too many things in his life that make his heart agitated. To decide on the status in the watchtower based on seniority, he has to compare many things.

Compare teachers, connections, and luck.

Whoever signs a contract has better relations with galleries and media, and has stronger marketing and promotion capabilities.Comparing who is favored by a major art critic.Even though they are all excellent painters, who can be on the cover of "Oil Painting" magazine for an exclusive interview...

There are too many external conditions that leave the painter helpless.

The quality of a painting is just a small link in this long chain of comparison.

Helpless people are always restless, they are just a tiny speck of sand caught in the torrent.

Those who fail want to succeed, while those who succeed are afraid of losing.

Painters who can calm down are usually devout believers in art itself.

Let the world be ever-changing and vicissitudes of life.

They just want to paint their own pictures well.

"Shengzi, even I can't tell clearly. When I first picked up the paintbrush when I was young, was it for myself or for my grandfather's happiness? Wouldn't it be impure?" Gu Weijing asked.

"Van Gogh and Goya once wanted to be a priest, Manet thought of a lawyer, and the reason why Reano turned to painting in the first place was just because he could earn more as an apprentice in an Oriental porcelain shop. As long as you have pure The desire to paint well, it doesn’t matter why you pick up the brush.”

"Becoming a great painter like my father is also my motivation for painting!"

Sakai Katsuko put her cheek on Gu Weijing's chest pitifully, and specifically used herself as an example, "Our desire to paint well is originally composed of many factors."

She knew it was because of the gap in her original family.

Sometimes Gu Weijing is like a persistent artist, and sometimes he is like a scared child, always worried that he is not as good as others.

"Classmate Gu Weijing, you are really an outstanding person. If it weren't for you, I might still be painting some empty and boring works. My past life was like a glass marble. When I met you, this bullet The pearl just now has a spiral with a rainbow in the middle. You are the brightest color in my heart. Even 1 little Matsutaros cannot compare to this. What do you have to fear or feel inferior to?"

"fear……"

Gu Weijing felt the warmth from the smooth skin on his chest. Shengzi's body was very warm, as if it had turned into a pool of hot water and was about to melt into his body.

"You asked me what my greatest desires and fears are. Katsuko, would you like to hear what my fears are?"

Miss Shengzi lay on his chest and rubbed it gently: "As long as you are willing to talk to me, I will always be willing to listen. However, I can actually guess it."

"I'm worried about failure."

Gu Weijing touched Shengzi's hair.

"Since there are so many aspects of a painter's fate that are not determined by him, or even by the painting itself, what should I do if I am really a person who cannot reach the highest peak of art? Your mother asked us to support me to go on, but What if I can’t do it?”

Shengzi said, "Do good deeds and don't ask about your future."

But this was not easy for Gu Weijing.

Asking a sensitive person to tell others about his greatest fears and deepest cowards is tantamount to asking him to strip naked and show others.

It's just that Miss Sakai is so gentle, so gentle that he is willing to tell the other person these deeply buried emotions.

"Did my mother threaten you?" Shengzi frowned slightly.

"Not really. Auntie once made a promise to me. Once you achieve certain goals, you will promise me to be with you. Later, Auntie never mentioned these things again, but I can see that in your mother's heart, Shengzi's other half is , he must be a man who is extremely dazzling. I can draw well, but whether it is dazzling or not, some things are not decided by me. I think she will be very disappointed if I can't do it."

Gu Weijing said softly.

"No." Miss Sakai shook her head.

"Do you think I will succeed? So you have so much confidence in me." Gu Weijing smiled.

Sakai Katsuko stretched out her hand and smoothed the light-blocking eye mask, and she could still see the corners of her eyebrows furrowed with worry.

"No, Gu Jun, what I mean is that if you shine brightly, you are my lover. If you really can't reach high places, you are also my lover. What I like is you. Whether you can succeed or not is not The cornerstone of our relationship. If you can't shine in the world, you can be my rainbow."

The girl seemed to remember something.

She smiled slightly and whispered into Gu Weijing's ear: "If you are really worried about my mother. Let me tell you a secret. My mother is actually a very sharp-tongued person. She is worse than she appears on the outside. What comes out is much more emotional. As long as you really work hard, she won't blame you."

emotional?
Gu Weijing recalled Professor Cruz who asked him to meet in the office and very arrogantly told him that if his work could not sell for ten thousand dollars, he was not allowed to touch her daughter.

I really can't associate that mean mouth with the word "emotional".

"Let me tell you a story. I mentioned to you before that my father encountered similar problems when he was young. He was in a very similar state of mind to you, failure, being judged by critics, self-doubt, and a vicious cycle of each other. At that time His contract with Eiro Ohta is only half a year. Large Japanese galleries are more expensive than European galleries and sign long-term contracts, but galleries generally have the right to unconditionally terminate the contract after the first half year. If you can't push it forward with some resources, just hurry up and get it. Get out of here and don’t lie under their golden name.”

"So behind every successful painter in Japan, there are the bones of countless losers. My father almost became such a loser who was abandoned by the gallery."

"For a painter with no foundation like him, it is very difficult to get a contract from a big gallery like Daejeon Art Gallery. But if he screws up, no gallery owner will give him a second chance. His life is tied to On top of that contract, which was dozens of pages long, and he was losing that contract little by little."

"It was the darkest six months of my father's life. He was scolded by critics, and the gallery withdrew promotion. He wanted to participate in the Yokohama Art Exhibition, but was rejected even for the entry audition. Later, his self-confidence even collapsed. He would often stare at the canvas in a daze for an hour, because his mind was completely blank and he couldn’t even put pen to paper.”

"At first, the agent hired a psychiatrist for him, but then the agent gave up on him. My mother took him to Sensoji Temple to burn incense. That's when the conversation where the Zen master lectured him happened -"

Sakai Katsuko spoke in a calm tone.

Gu Weijing listened with rapt attention.

He vaguely heard on the Internet that Uncle Sakai before he became famous was criticized by critics for not having his own characteristics.

I just didn’t expect that Professor Kazunari Sakai, who was broad-minded and fat, weighed 200 pounds, was worth more than his weight in gold, and had unlimited fame, would be so depressed back then.

"What happened next? Your father listened to the Zen master's lectures and became enlightened. He is also very wise." Gu Weijing said in admiration.

"No way. Didn't I tell you? He doesn't believe the Kyoto monks at all. He thinks all the old Zen masters are talking nonsense."

Sakai Katsuko tilted her head.

"At that time, he bought a basin of charcoal online, and he decided to die the day he got the gallery's notice of termination."

(End of this chapter)