Please, come home and practice the piano

Chapter 833 92. Reflections on cars: the real current situation of teachers and students

In the morning, Li An went out to buy groceries, came back and practiced the piano, and started cooking at eleven o'clock.

While chopping vegetables, I watched Lao Tang’s live broadcast selling lessons. Professor Huang did not appear today, only Lao Tang and a small teaching assistant.

Compared with half a month ago, Lao Tang's talk has become much smoother. He can now move his hands and mouth at the same time and speak while playing, but he can't rhyme.

Forty-five minutes later, one dish, one soup and two bowls of rice were served.

Li An even arranged the plate specially, just placing a vase with flowers on the table.

There were no flowers, but he prepared other small things for the car.

After this morning's small incident, Li An realized that getting along with children is really a science.

Although he has no children, and has no experience in raising a child, he has always thought that he understands children very well.

And in his heart, he defines himself as a parent who is good at communicating with his children.

In the process of getting along with several children, many things have come true to his ideas.

He is really good at dealing with children and all the issues they ask.

Perhaps it was because of this that he gradually ignored some of the most fundamental things in the process of getting along with his children, including the children's own views on many issues and their native personalities.

In other words, he can often find the problem at once, and then immediately provide a solution that fits the current situation, then implement it, and finally get it done.

It seems efficient and simple, but is this approach really correct?

For example, this morning, Xiaoche asked him if he was disappointed with it.

Li An almost subconsciously noticed the true psychological dynamics of Xiaoche at that time. Then he first gave Xiaoche the affirmation he needed in his heart, and after guiding his emotions to the positive side, he then told Xiaoche how to get rid of this emotion through examples.

Everyone was happy and the little car was smiling happily as it went to school.

But when Ang Lee looked back on the whole thing, he realized that he had overlooked two important points.

Neither of these two points has much to do with the matter itself, but in Ang Lee's opinion, they reveal something that he should pay attention to.

First, was Xiaoche’s motive for showing him his homework this morning correct?

At that time, Li An was holding Xiao Che's homework from yesterday. When he heard Xiao Che asking such questions, his first reaction was to calm Xiao Che's emotions.

The source of this instinctive reaction is his love for his children.

But looking back on this matter again, perhaps it is more objective to look at its true appearance this way——

The reason why he wanted to watch the car's work the night before yesterday was because the speed of the car was beyond his imagination, even though he didn't think it was enough after listening to the recording of the car.

Not enough is his standard, and exceeding his imagination is progress.

As for the ratio of time and effect in Xiaoche's piano practice, Li An can almost tell how long Xiaoche has practiced without looking at the system.

So where did the car squeeze out the time to complete such speed increase the day before yesterday?
All he could think of was that there was very little car homework, or that he had completed most of it at school, or that this week's piano practice had compressed the time for homework.

So he asked the cart to take a look at the homework. He still remembered that the cart hesitated for a moment. After looking at it, it was indeed as he expected. The cart sacrificed part of the homework time. He did show dissatisfaction with this, although only a little.

But it was this emotion that was sensitively captured by the child.

Then he had a busy day yesterday and received this morning's plot. Xiaoche was afraid that he would be disappointed, so the remedy he gave was to complete yesterday's homework seriously and let himself check it.

Then the question arises, if he had not checked the car's work the day before yesterday, or if he had not shown any dissatisfaction after checking it, would the scene like this morning still happen?

Li An has been emphasizing the importance of learning to Xiaoche, and Xiaoche has indeed changed his attitude towards learning. Since six times, Xiaoche has been making progress.

What made Xiaoche change his attitude? Li An felt that if it was just because of his request, then he should really reflect on it.

The car is not his child, but it is already better than his child in his heart.

Regarding learning, Li An felt that he had to take a long-term approach.

Learning for him, this won’t work.

Second point, why does Xiaoche think he will be disappointed.

Restoring the same incident, the car just did not do its homework well once, and in Li An's opinion, the handwriting was just a little sloppy.

Even if you really talk about it, you can't say it's not serious, and the car is just to save time for practicing.

If it were some other children, I'm afraid they would feel that they had completed their homework and practiced the piano well. If it were Wang Xiaohu, he might feel proud.

Why does he have the mentality that he will be disappointed when he gets to the car?

Li An was thinking about this problem when he was buying groceries in the morning. On the way to the bus, he also checked on the Internet for similar problems.

Logically speaking, among all his students, the child he gave the most recognition to was Xiaoche.

It is understandable that Xiao Che is extremely sensible in life and has great talent in playing the piano.

In addition to his talent, he also has a hard-working spirit and spends almost all his spare time on the piano.

For such a child, any teacher would not treat her like a baby.

Not just him, any of his friends who know about cars don’t give a thumbs up when mentioning cars?

Teacher Wei directly gave his bracelet to Xiao Che as a greeting gift, which is enough to show that the old man affirmed Xiao Che.

After all, Xiaoche was someone else's child living at home temporarily, but after Chen Xuan went abroad, she mentioned to Li An more than once that Xiaoche was part of their family.

Everyone likes cars very much, and it’s not like Xiaoche doesn’t know it.

Often children who have not received care and recognition in their lives for a long time are more likely to suffer from low self-esteem.

Following this idea, Ang Lee seemed to have found some new thinking paths.

The native family lacks maternal love, and campus life lacks normal social interaction.

These two points are enough to make most children feel "I am different" and develop an inferiority complex.

But he quickly dismissed this clue.

Compared with the Xiaohu, which is in a similar situation, the car can be said to be quite perfect in handling some problems.

face challenge--

Wang Xiaohu would first avoid something, then pressurize himself, and finally act like he was in a life-or-death battle, fearing failure.

The car is relaxed and calm.

Faced with things that were not done well——

Wang Xiaohu occasionally reveals that he doesn't care about this matter.

For small cars, the emphasis is on participation, just do your best.

Meet new friends.

Wang Xiaohu will keep his distance first.

The car will actively send friendly signals.

Looking back at the entire summer camp, it can be said that Ang Lee was deeply impressed by the various actions of the car.

Just two things.

The first thing was that when Wang Xiaohu, Lu Hanwen and Liu Zige were interested in each other and refused to accept each other, Xiao Che had already taken the initiative to wave to Doudou and asked Doudou to sit next to him.

The second thing is that in the second round of the ice-breaking game, Xiao Che enthusiastically participated in the vocabulary performance. On the contrary, some girls were embarrassed to make some such actions.

Neither of these things has anything to do with the piano.

Can you say that a small car like this is inferior?

Obviously not.

If it's not the fear of disappointing others due to inferiority complex, then what else could it be?

Finally, Ang Lee seemed to find the answer in a conversation in his memory.

On the way to Yanjing on the train, the teacher and student chatted a lot in the morning. Xiaoche asked him a question about the results of the Chengdu Cup.

The car asked: Teacher, don’t you want me to get first place? Ang Lee's answer is: Of course the teacher hopes.

Although he said it later, his first attitude was still to confirm that there was a problem with the car.

Maybe this sentence is not important to him, but it is different for the car.

Thinking about it now, he still gave the car a feeling of "he needed".

From this conversation, Li An gradually got to the core of the incident.

He was wondering if his demands on the car had been too high.

He hadn't realized this problem before.

He even said that he occasionally felt that he had no requirements for the car. He thought the car was very good as it was.

What does he think is good?

He seizes all the time to practice the piano and makes visible progress every week. He doesn’t have to worry about learning. He can take care of his own food and drink when he is busy, and plan his life time. He says he takes care of the car, but isn’t the car sometimes there too? Take care of him?
good or not?
It was so good that Ang Lee had become accustomed to it.

Over time, have children become accustomed to this?

But aren’t any of these qualities the parents now crave for their children?
Li An wondered if he had given the car too little frontage. It seemed that he often praised the car, but his praise was not rooted in what the car had actually done. It was just like praising every child, if you do it, I will definitely praise you.

The problem is that at the same age of twelve or thirteen, Wang Xiaohu practiced the piano for two hours on weekends and received praise from him, while Xiao Che practiced the piano for six or seven hours and received the same praise as Wang Xiaohu.

Comparing the level of hard work, it is obvious that the small car deserves more praise.

Thinking about this case further, Li An felt it was unfair, because he thought that if Xiaoche only practiced piano for four hours on the weekend, he would be a little dissatisfied with Xiaoche.

He had obviously practiced for two hours more than Wang Xiaohu, but even if he didn't receive any praise, he still made the teacher dissatisfied.

Although the car had never wasted a weekend and had never seen this scene, thinking about this scene, he felt that he should not be so good.

It’s okay to get less positive affirmation. What Xiaoche got from him was more encouragement.

What is affirmation? Affirmation is in the past tense, affirming your efforts in the past period.

What is encouragement? It is in the future tense. Encouragement represents expectations and hopes that you will be better.

But in the eyes of children, does too much encouragement from teachers also mean that they have not done well enough in the past?
Therefore, if the teacher discovers that the homework was not done well, it becomes a big deal.

At this point, Li An seemed to understand the whole thing.

If he was given another chance, he would not say to the car again this morning: The teacher will never be disappointed in you.

He would say: You have done a great job, very good.

It sounds like the above answer seems to be more relevant to the child's heart at the time, but fundamentally speaking, the child needs the following affirmation.

Not being disappointed with you means that the teacher knows that you can do better.

You have done a good job, which sounds like comfort, but it will give the child more confidence to deal with the next step, unlike the above sentence, which is like saying that it doesn't matter, the teacher believes that you will do better. .

This was what he reflected on at the beginning.

Many times he can immediately identify the core of the problem, then immediately develop a solution that suits the current situation, and then implement it, solving the child’s emotional needs, and everyone is happy in the end.

It seems efficient and simple, but is this approach really correct for children?

Today, when everything is pursuing efficiency, every adult knows that in pursuing high efficiency, something will inevitably be lost.

Therefore, Li An realized that getting along with children is really a science. There are some things that he can afford to lose. He doesn't know whether others can afford to lose some things, but he can't afford to lose them.

To him, a car is better than a daughter.

However, in the long run, he couldn't draw the battle line too long, so he prepared a little surprise for the car.

After placing the dishes and chopsticks, he just waited for the car to come back.

After a while, 80,000 moved first.

The kitten heard the movement outside the door and immediately ran downstairs to meow.

Then there was the sound of a door opening.

"Ah, 80,000~" the cute voice said, and then: "Teacher, I'm back!"

"Wash your hands and eat!" Li An turned around and went to the kitchen to put down his apron. Hearing the movement of the car, he couldn't help but feel relieved.

Even though the car seemed to be fine when it left in the morning, Li An knew that this child was capable of pretending.

"Wow, stir-fried pork and tomato and egg soup!"

Both dishes are the dishes that Xiao Che usually likes very much. Rubbing his hands, Xiao Che habitually waits for the teacher to sit down first.

I don't know how many times Li An has said this, just sit down first. He is nagging me every day.

Today he stopped nagging and sat down directly. This problem cannot be solved by nagging every day, "Go get a spoon."

"Ho!" He jumped on the car three times to retrieve the spoon.

When she went to get the spoon, she found a paper bag with a very beautiful pattern and color on the corner of the stove. It seemed that the teacher was going to put garbage in it. What a pity.

"Teacher, give me that bag~"

"What bag?" Li An didn't react immediately.

"It's the powder bag on the stove. It's patterned and made of paper."

Li Anxin laughed at what bag he was talking about, "That one is a little wet, no-"

He wanted to say no, but wait for Zhou Tian to get you as much as you want, but his words changed: "If you don't mind, just put it away."

The teachers and students started to move.

"I don't mind," Xiao Che said matter-of-factly, "I want to use it to decorate the pothos pothos."

Ang Lee: "Huh?"

Xiao Che explained seriously: "Teacher, the surface of the pothos flower pot is full of pits. When water is poured inside, scum falls outside, so I want to wrap it up."

Ang Lee: "Good idea."

Car: "Hey."

Li Anxin thought that he was lucky that he didn't say no. If he had said no, he might have missed the little girl's thoughts behind it, even though his starting point was to get a new bag for the car.

"Teacher! It's time to go back to Chopin's Paris Years."

"Correct."

Then the morning table conversation started again between the teacher and the student.

While Li An was talking, there was a knock on the door in the living room.

"go."

"Ok!"

The cart went to open the door and found that it was takeout.

She thought it was delivered by mistake, but the delivery uncle said it was correct. She looked down and saw that it was her favorite bubble tea!
Even though bubble tea is much cheaper than many milk teas, she loves drinking this!

But what makes her happiest is having two cups!

One person has a cup, and the teacher and student continue.

"Paris is of extraordinary significance to Chopin, just as Chengdu is to your teacher and me."

Just then, the cell phone on the table rang.

Li An looked down and saw that the hand holding the chopsticks froze.

Fang Yongbo called.

The car's big eyes flickered curiously, and he didn't forget to take a sip of the bubble tea.

(End of this chapter)