Roaming Collector

"..." <[..]

He really wanted to complain—your sister, why did you stab me before I agreed?Also, did you explain the name issue clearly before stabbing the knife? !

With such regrets, Otonashi's consciousness gradually blurred, and slowly, slowly fell into the darkness...

No wonder!

Just before Otonashi's consciousness was completely plunged into darkness, a hand knife slashed on his head, but he accomplished the feat of "resurrection" astonishingly.

"Hey! You are whipping the corpse!" Otonashi couldn't calm down, glared at Mouzhen, and complained hysterically.

"Before complaining, pay attention to your own state." Mouzhen's eyes were full of contempt: "Aren't you still alive and kicking?"

"Hiss...it hurts!" Holding the wound on his heart that was gradually recovering, Otonashi's facial features were twisted into a ball due to the pain: "Damn the worldview after death, even this kind of injury can't die..."

"You have personally seen Noda die from a punctured heart." Ah Zhen patted Otonashi on the shoulder: "So don't blame your own mistakes on the world, the world is always the most innocent."

"Huh?" Otonashi didn't seem to understand.

"That is to say..." Stretching out his little finger, Ah Zhen poked Otonashi's wound very unscrupulously, ignoring the expression on the other side's painful eyeballs that were about to pop out of the eye sockets, and said to himself: "This kind of heart piercing injury can only be fatal if it is placed on you!"

"... Huh!" Otonashi, who had finally recovered from the pain, let out a sigh of relief, and asked weakly, "What do you mean?"

"Didn't you realize that you in this world don't have a heartbeat?" Ah Zhen shrugged.

"Eh?" Touching the healed wound, Otonashi said in a daze, "Really!"

At this time, he finally came to his senses: "By the way, how did you know that I didn't have a heartbeat? Also, you seemed to call out my full name just now? We knew each other before we were alive?"

"I don't know!" Mouzhen answered happily.

"Huh?" Otonashi was at a loss.

"It's just..." Taking advantage of the height of the floating state, Ah Zhen stroked Zen's hair: "Because of you, this child came to this world that she should not have come to."

"...What?!" Otonashi's mouth broke through the limit of the opening and closing angle.Looking at the innocent expression on Zuo's face (actually Sanwu), he went crazy in his thinking circuit, simulating a scene where a gangster rapes a girl, and the victim can't rest in peace after death...

"No... Impossible!" Otonashi's face turned completely black—could it be that I lost my memory after death because I was so scumbag that I couldn't stand myself anymore?

"Young man, you are overthinking..." Ah Zhen's face was dark...

"Uh... huh?" Yin Wu was shocked, "You...you can read minds?!"

"Yes, but there is no need to use it on you." Ah Zhen spread his hands: "You didn't need to read your mind at all with the expression you just showed."

"Uh..." Otonashi's facial muscles began to twitch and twist: "Again, who the hell are you? How do you know me so well? Are you really the god of this world?"

"This world can't hold me at all, how can I be the god of this world?"

"Can't fit you?"

"If I descend directly on my body, within a few minutes, this world will burst like a balloon that has been blown over the head."

"...Is your body Vy Canis Major (the largest known star)?!"

"No."

"Don't answer my complaints so seriously!"

"Then get down to business." Ah Zhen's expression became serious: "Young man, do you want to retrieve your memory?"

"...When you call me 'boy', can I trouble you to change your face?"

"...I can't!" Shaking his head, Ah Zhen sighed: "What? Don't you have the courage to face your own memory? Or... Are you afraid that the brain supplement just now will come true?"

Otonashi: "..."

Zou: "...May I ask what you just made up in your head?!"

"Absolutely not!" Otonashi almost jumped up.

"Zoujiang, there are some things that don't need to be understood." Ah Zhen put his small face in front of Zuo's eyes, raised a finger seriously, closed one eye, and swung his raised index finger left and right: "Those things are not only irrelevant , it will also affect your mood.”

"Oh..." Zuo nodded half understanding.

"Stop talking nonsense." Ah Zhen looked at Otonashi: "Otonashi Yuzuru, I need you to restore your memory, and do something for me and Zenchan."

Then, he looked at Zuo again: "We can confirm his identity."

"Probably..." Zao remained expressionless.

"Hey, what's my opinion?" Yin Wu pointed to himself.

"Ignore it!" Ah Zhenyi pointed at Zhong Yinwu's eyebrows.

……

I don't understand the meaning of living.

Why live?

Why take an interest in other people?

Why get involved with other people?

Full of confusion about survival.This kind of me, the so-called "life", is actually doing the minimum part-time job to support myself every day, living in this world numbly and at a loss.

However, I have a younger sister who is completely opposite to me.

She is optimistic, cheerful, yearning for life and communicating with others.

She is alive and full of hope for life.

Her name is Otonashi Hatsune, but she has been hospitalized for two years because of a serious illness.

I've been thinking, how great would it be if I could change it with my sister?I have no hope, I can't even find the meaning of life, but I have always enjoyed a healthy body, and my sister who is full of hope in life is bedridden.

This is so unfair!

Perhaps it is because of this kind of thinking and these sympathies that I often visit her in the hospital.The remaining spare money was also used to buy various magazines and comics for my sister.

Every time she gets the reading materials I bought for her, she will happily receive them and say thank you brother sweetly.

Perhaps for me, this thank you from my sister is the only motivation to support me to live. <From summer to summer, from summer to autumn, from autumn to winter...

Working part-time in winter is very hard. The cold wind cuts the exposed skin like a sharp knife, and the fingertips are so painful that they are numb.

But I still insist on the most basic part-time job, for that salary, for survival.

Why live?

I don't want to think about it, and I can't think about it.I'm afraid that after thinking about it, I'm afraid I won't be able to continue working part-time.

I need this negligible income, in order to live, to visit my sister and buy comics for her.

Snowflakes fell, coating the whole city with a layer of silver.Stepping on the snow, I suddenly realized that Christmas was approaching.

Should I talk to the doctor and let my sister go out on Christmas Day?

This idea appeared in my mind, and I couldn't get it out of my mind.

With such a heavy snow, the wheelchair must not be able to move?Then I had to go out for a stroll with her on my back.

If it's just my younger sister, no matter how far I go with her on my back, it's fine for me.

Then, where should we take her?

Go where she wants to go, buy her something, buy her presents, take her out for cake one more time.

In this case, you have to earn a little more.

Holding these thoughts, I seem to have some motivation for life.

That night, I mentioned it to my sister and asked her where she wanted to go for Christmas.

The answer my sister gave was beyond my expectation. The place she wanted to go would be the streets in the city because the lights on Christmas Eve were beautiful.

I agreed to my sister's request without hesitation, and as usual I got a thank you.However, looking at the smile on my sister's face, I think this thank you is the happiest thank you ever.

Having made up my mind, I began to work around in spite of my exhaustion, and when I got home, I fell into bed and fell asleep.Because I have a goal and find the meaning of action, I feel more fulfilled in my current life than ever before.

The only worry is that my sister's health seems to be getting worse.

On Christmas Day, the request to go out was denied by the doctor.So I sneaked into the ward after visiting hours and, as promised, carried my sister to the streets on Christmas Eve.

The branches of the trees are covered with lights, accompanied by the snowflakes falling from the sky. It is really the same as what my sister said, the streets on Christmas Eve are surprisingly beautiful.

"Well, it's very beautiful!" Although the younger sister's voice was weak, she sounded really happy: "Thank you, brother."

So, my motivation became more sufficient.

After that, I walked down the street with my sister on my back, talking to myself about my plans for the whole night.I found that after so many years of life, it was the first time I felt the meaning of being alive.

No, not the first time.The meaning of being alive has always existed, and it is within my reach.

However, when I suddenly realized this, that meaning also bid farewell to me quietly.