i'm not a bad man

Chapter 9 You don’t need to do anything for me

The moment Lu Xi opened the car door, darkness seemed to have come. I saw the lights of the fishing port in the distance, and the machines working on the sea also turned on their warning lights one after another, reminding me. Boats coming and going must keep their distance and pay attention to traffic safety.

This kind of bright light is different from the dense lights in the city. They are reflected on the sea. After being refracted by the sea water, they fly into the empty night sky. If you look at it more, your heart will wander, and then you will feel deserted and lonely...

This is why I must go to the city before night falls. Of course, I prefer the warm lights in the city.

……

Lu Xi was still wearing the blue and white dress she had worn in the afternoon. It was already late autumn, and the place was empty and unobstructed, so she looked very thin standing in the wind.

She also realized that she was cold, so she hugged herself with her arms and said to me, "Did Sister Minhong come to see you?"

"Yes, she showed me those photos... She said that if those photos were exposed, they would have a very bad impact on you."

"and then?"

I took off my coat and motioned for her to put it on first, but she gave me a cold look and said, "No need to be attentive, just say what you need to say clearly."

I didn't feel embarrassed about her rejection, I just smiled and replied: "After I left a bad impression in your mind, you began to misunderstand me... This is not being attentive, this is obvious. I’m just being gentlemanly to you, okay?”

"I don't need your gentlemanly demeanor... If you really had a gentlemanly demeanor, these messy things wouldn't happen."

"I don't want these messy things to happen...but these messy things happened to the two of us, and I am also helpless...Big star, stop standing around. Since you have arrived at my house, come in and have a drink. Hot water... If I really catch a cold, I will be charged with another crime. How innocent I am!"

At this time, Lu Xi looked at the RV parked behind me. She seemed to be a woman born with a lack of curiosity. Therefore, she did not ask me like others: Why did I choose to start a family at the age when I should have a family? She wanted to stay with the RV... However, she did not refuse my proposal. After I opened the door of the RV, she entered the car.

……

The RV was very small, and the dining area was also a place for entertaining people, so she had no choice but to sit on the dining chair. She didn't seem to like this kind of small and enclosed space. After sitting down, she opened her The curtains on one side, so I saw the lights on the other side of the sea in this small window...

I heard that Huangdao is across the sea. I have been in Qingdao for a year and a half and have never left the main city, nor have I deliberately inquired what kind of place Huangdao is; so I don’t know the lights on the other side of the sea. , are they industrial lights or city lights...

Eighty percent of it is industrial lights, because looking to the other side from my place, it still feels deserted. Huangdao is mostly an industrial zone where no one lives.

I was thinking this while making hot tea for Luxi...

I brought the hot tea in front of her, and then sat down opposite her. That window became the only way for us to feel the outside world... At this time, the moon had risen, and the sound of the tide was also rising. Very clear...

In my memory, it has been a long time since I faced a woman in such a posture in the RV, and I couldn't help but feel a little dazed... In the daze, I thought of Luan Yu who had left me. In the past, we also had many nights like this. Park the RV at the beach, at the foot of the mountain, in a sparsely populated village...

She is very lively and always walks around in the RV. Sometimes she asks me to sing to her, and sometimes she asks me to cook her some food... She also likes campfires, so along the way, she likes to use the car the most. Stop at the foot of the mountain because we can pick up dry branches there. When night comes, we will light a bonfire and roast some food on the bonfire. When we are full, she will hide in my arms and we Drinking wine, watching the stars, talking about music, and talking about the short decades of life...

Compared to Luan Yu, the woman in front of me seemed very cold and resistant... Therefore, this long-lost feeling only made a slight ripple in my heart, and then quickly disappeared.I didn't miss this feeling too much. When she held up the cup, I smiled again and said, "I only know that you are a star. I don't know if you are a singer or a movie star?"

"Does it have anything to do with you? I'm not here to chat with you."

"Of course it does matter... If it weren't for your identity, this matter would be just a misunderstanding at most. If you explain it clearly, it will be over... So, don't always blame me for this matter. You yourself are not the same." There are no problems... My attitude now is very clear. I caused this matter, and I am willing to cooperate with you to solve this trouble... But the root of the problem still lies in your identity as a celebrity, which will attract many people's attention. With you... even if there is no me, Han Chao, sooner or later there will be Li Chao, Wang Chao, Ah Chao and so on."

After saying that, I looked at her, and this was the first time she looked at me squarely. I didn't see any emotional fluctuations in her eyes, so her tone was still calm: "I have no intention of asking you to cooperate with me. What to do... Sister Minhong has already told me that she hopes we can fall in love to resolve this trouble... From the perspective of the entertainment industry, this is indeed a solution to the problem... However, I don't accept this arrangement... This is not the love I need, and love is not a business... She said, you are ready to leave Qingdao, and she won't let you go... I came to you just to inform you You, you don’t need to do anything for me... you can leave Qingdao now."

What she said was very convincing, so it was beyond my expectation. In my opinion, what people in the entertainment industry care about most is their own image, because image is related to their stardom, but she did not do it for She has to compromise on her own stardom... From this point of view, she must be a person with bottom lines and principles in her heart.

"Okay, I understand what you mean. You can make the decision on this matter, right?"

"I can."

After receiving this affirmative answer, the burden in my heart was relieved, so I breathed out gently and said: "Then I can leave Qingdao with peace of mind... But... I still feel a little bit sorry about this matter... We can still chat... I sincerely say sorry to you..."

"You don't have to say sorry to me... If you really feel a little sorry in your heart... please don't appear in my sight again."

"Okay, I can definitely do this..."

After Lu Xi got my assurance, she stood up, and I stood up with her, ready to see off the guests.

Just like she said, our bad way of meeting destined us not to chat like friends...

This is nothing. After we are separated here, she has her starlight, and I also have the light on the road. Neither of us needs the other to illuminate, so saying goodbye is a normal thing.

……

I opened the door of the RV for her, and the cold wind blew in again. She couldn't help but shiver, and then stopped...

I thought to myself: Could it be that you want to borrow a piece of clothing from me?But she set her sights on my old-fashioned vinyl record player. Next to the record player were 14 sets of vinyl records, all of which were works by Jay Chou.

Until this moment, there was another expression on her face besides indifference, like joy, but also like a kind of incredible recognition; she must not have thought that in my small RV, There are actually vinyl records that are more antique than those CD records of hers... Moreover, we are actually fans of the same person.

I clearly saw in her eyes the desire to say a few more words to me, but I don’t know what kind of mood she was in. After all, she didn’t speak again. She tucked her clothes tightly and faced the cold wind of late autumn. Returned to his car.

The next moment, I saw a scene that surprised me under the light. She was sitting in the car and didn't leave for a long time... She lost her mind. This look was very similar to me suddenly falling in love because of a certain scene. Thinking of Luan Yu's appearance... I wanted to find her, but I couldn't do anything. So, regret lingered in my heart, and then turned into a kind of hopeless loneliness... Loneliness made me want to drink away my sorrows, and it made me want to be wanton. Indulgence... This is probably my mental journey after Luan Yu left.

What about her?
Do all the famous stars have the same troubles as me?
Aren’t these worries supposed to belong only to mortals?

(End of this chapter)