I'm afraid I'm not interested in love

Chapter 580 Oh! Good boy

"Son, as adults, especially men, we must have our own opinions and be responsible for our own actions."

Before he had even taken two sips of the wine, Su Zelang had already started talking.

If Su Chengyi didn't know that he was like this, he would almost think that he was hinting at something.

After all, words like "being responsible for one's own actions" can also be transformed into "being responsible for one's own scumbag behavior."

However, it turned out that Su Zelang was just addicted to preaching over wine, and he soon started a new round of preaching.

"Life, in the final analysis, comes down to three words: keep calm, bend down, and hold your head high."

Su Zelang raised his head and took a sip of wine. The wine went into his heart and he sighed deeply.

"Promise me that you will read less chicken soup on WeChat public accounts in the future, okay?"

Su Chengyi poked the piece of slightly overcooked pork belly in the bowl and spoke slowly.

Hearing his complaints, Su Zelang scratched the back of his head with a smile, and said a little embarrassedly:

"These are all the life lessons that Dad has figured out. Oh, son, you understand them when you are my age!"

He picked up his wine glass, touched Su Chengyi's Coke cup, and then continued:

"Let's not talk about this anymore, son. You're nineteen years old and you're leaving."

Su Chengyi felt that his old father actually had a lot to say, but he didn't know how to start, so he held it in for a long time and uttered a dry "Go one".

It makes people feel strangely complicated.

Su Chengyi picked up the cup and clinked it lightly with his, and the dark brown carbonated drink in the cup gurgled and bubbles appeared.

"I've been thinking about your childhood a lot lately, son. When you were only this tall, you could already recite a long string of pi values."

Su Zelang raised his hand to indicate a height in the air, and said with a smile:

"Every time I took you out to eat with my friends, I asked you to perform this. You were always reluctant, but I felt so proud at the time. My brothers all said that I was blessed to have a genius son.

Later, you suddenly told me that you actually couldn't recite at all, and that the numbers after the 20th digit were just made up. Oh my! I was so scared, afraid that someone would find out and laugh at you! "

Su Zelang slammed the table, still seeming a little frightened.

Su Chengyi lowered his head and drank Coke to hide the smile on his lips.

He actually still remembers it.

How could he not know how to carry it? He just didn't want to be a conspicuous bag in front of Su Zelang's friends. It was unreliable that his father would believe this excuse.

"Another time, you and your grandpa made a paper airplane together. It looked like a real airplane. You were so professional.

It was flying high! I didn’t even see what was happening, and it was already hanging on the tree. Son, do you remember? It was the tree in your grandparents’ yard, it was very tall!

Su Zelang stretched out his arms and gestured excitedly twice, obviously deeply impressed by this incident.

"remember."

Su Chengyi nodded and used tongs to turn over the honey-glazed chicken wings in the baking tray.

"Everyone said it was too high and hard to get. Even a ladder couldn't reach the branch. Your mom said directly that she couldn't have it anymore, and your grandpa also said that he would help you make a new one.

To be honest, when my dad first saw the height, he was also scared, and the tree was old and not very stable."

Until now, Su Zelang didn't have the courage to tell his son that he was actually a little afraid of heights. He just took a sip of wine and smacked his lips to calm himself down.

Su Chengyi nodded without saying anything. In fact, he had long known that Su Zelang was afraid of heights. When he went hiking as a child, he didn't even dare to look down the mountain.

"You have been a quiet kid since you were little. You don't cry or make a fuss, and you don't say you can't bear to leave the plane. You just nod and agree when your mother coaxes you.

Everyone thought you were sensible and wouldn't be unhappy, but I was the only one who noticed you sitting by the door, staring at the sky in a daze."

At this point, Su Zelang couldn't help but shook his head and laughed.

"Or is it still said that no one knows a son better than his father? Son, at the critical moment, dad still understands you.

At that time, the dad thought, it doesn’t matter if his legs or arms are broken, I will get the paper airplane back for my son today.”

To this day, Su Zelang can still feel the impulsive feeling he had at that time. As an unreliable father, he rarely has such a strong sense of responsibility.

"And I know you are a bad boy. You may agree on the surface, but when no one is watching you, you will definitely have to climb up and get it by yourself."

Hearing him say this, Su Chengyi raised his eyebrows in slight surprise.

I didn’t expect that my unreliable dad actually knew him well. This is indeed what he did when he was a child.

"So in the end you still climbed up to help me get it, trembling with fear."

Su Chengyi recalled.

"How come you don't describe your dad as heroic at all?! Shouldn't his love be as majestic as a mountain? Talk to your dad quietly and see if you've written about this in your essay "My Dad" or something like that?"

Not hearing the ideal answer, Su Zelang couldn't help but knock his chopsticks in protest.

After all, this was one of the few heroic moments he could recall, but Su Chengyi described him as a turkey on a grill!
"By the way, waiter, when will the roast chicken be served to our table?"

Anyway, thinking of this, Su Zelang urged for a dish.

"not at all."

Su Chengyi spoke vaguely while chewing chicken wings.

When he was a child, the essay topics he hated most were "I Love My Family" and "My Father", because at such times he could only write about the most common examples in the model essays.

For example, when a child is sick and has a fever, his mother carries him to the hospital, and his father rides his bicycle in the rain to take him to school.
Very rustic.

Su Chengyi picked up a piece of beef and put it in his mouth, thinking, it’s really rustic.

Come to think of it, the most difficult problem he has encountered in his studies since childhood is probably writing essays that require true feelings. All other times it has been smooth sailing.

The waiter brought the roast chicken to the table and politely asked, holding a knife, if we needed help cutting it.

Su Zelang shook his head decisively, took the knife and fork, cut the chicken leg and put it on Su Chengyi's plate.

"Time flies, son. Every time I see you, you are different. But when Dad thinks of you, you are still the same as when you were a child."

Su Chengyi was actually full, but the chicken leg was roasted very well, with a crispy skin and tender and juicy inside.

"You are studying in Beijing now. I'm afraid you will develop your career there after graduation, right? Actually, Dad has always wanted to tell you that Beijing is good, and our Tang'an is not bad either. With your ability, you will do well anywhere. But after thinking about it carefully, forget it."

Su Zelang put down his knife and fork, looked at Su Chengyi who was concentrating on gnawing the chicken leg, picked up the empty wine glass, sighed quietly, and after a while, he continued:
"As a young man, it's good for you to want to venture out more. I won't say much more. Dad trusts you unconditionally and is your most reliable supporter."

Although Su Zelang usually talks a lot of nonsense, what he said was sincere and quite touching.

Su Chengyi listened quietly, lowered his head and said nothing.

It is impossible to say that he was not touched at all. After all, he was a reborn person. In his previous life, he only had a blood relationship with his parents, and no longer had any connection. In fact, rebirth for him was not the so-called "defying the will of heaven to change fate", but a story of "losing and regaining".

Now, listening to Su Zelang's words from the heart, Su Chengyi didn't react on the surface, but he was actually a little dazed.

He had even begun to think that perhaps he could talk to him openly about matters of the heart.

"Also, how are you with Xiao Chu recently? Although the little girl is not ordinary, Dad can see that she really likes you. You must treat her well!

Everything in this world is easy to solve, except for hurting a woman's love for you, which is hard to make up for no matter what you do. You really should listen to your dad in this regard. I am an experienced person after all."

Su Zelang paused, poured himself another glass of wine, and then drank it in one gulp.

He spoke sincerely and these were serious words from the bottom of his heart.

So the emotional troubles that Su Chengyi was about to express out loud got stuck on his lips, and for a long while, he just said "hmm".

Su Zelang felt that he was very satisfied with the barbecue meal.

After all, when his son went out to eat with him in the past, he would look down at his watch after eating a few bites and say that he had something urgent to do and had to leave.

This time, not only did she eat a lot, she was also willing to wait for him to slowly drink a couple of cups of wine.

You have grown up indeed.

Su Zelang, who was a little drunk, wiped the corners of his eyes.

As a father, he missed a large part of his son's growth process. It felt like he suddenly changed from a little kid to a skinny and taciturn teenager in high school.

Now, he has become a mature and steady adult. After sitting in the driver's seat, he seems to be more familiar with adjusting the seat and turning the steering wheel than him.

"From now on, I won't be staying in Tang'an for much time. Live your life well, Dad."

Su Chengyi backed out of the garage, glanced in the rearview mirror, and suddenly spoke.

Su Zelang was slightly stunned. He didn't expect him to suddenly talk to him. After a long while, he just said "ah".

"Don't feel like you owe me anything. You, my mom, and I are all victims. There's no question of who's right or wrong.

Of course, you still have a lot of things that I feel sorry for my mother. For example, you are lazy and greedy, and you always make empty promises. "

It was Su Chengyi’s first time driving Su Zelang’s car, and he was a little uncomfortable with it, but he quickly adjusted himself and followed the navigation instructions to get on the road.

Su Zelang felt a little embarrassed by what he said and could only smile awkwardly.

"However, the past is the past, let's all look forward."

At the traffic light ahead, Su Chengyi tapped the steering wheel lightly with his fingers, his eyes slowly falling on the family photo placed in front of the car.

He can see this photo every time he rides in Su Zelang's car. At first, he would deliberately avoid it, but now he doesn't mind it so much.

However, this sight made him slightly stunned.

When I saw this photo before, I was always in the passenger seat.

Now sitting in the driver's seat and looking from this angle, I can see that this photo has been processed.

Only from this special angle can you see that there is another photo forcibly pasted on the upper right corner of the family portrait.

That was a photo of Su Chengyi when he was a child. He was wearing a tiger-head hat and looking at the camera as seriously as a little adult.

Su Chengyi's breathing stagnated, he withdrew his gaze, and his heart was in turmoil.

After a long time, I just wanted to sigh.

The countdown at the traffic light ends and the wheels continue to move forward.

Su Chengyi thought about it and suddenly said:

"dad."

"What's wrong, son?"

Su Zelang was drunk and felt a little dizzy. When he heard him shout like that, he sat up straight and rubbed his face.

"I actually always believed in you about what happened back then."

Su Chengyi said slowly.

I kind of regret saying this.

After sending Su Zelang, who had been crying all the way, back to his home, Su Chengyi thought silently.

Perhaps it was because the grievance of being wrongly accused, questioned, and despised, not being believed by anyone, and losing everything over the years was too heavy, so that Su Zelang, a tall and strong middle-aged man, would be completely broken down by his son's words.

Su Chengyi didn't say this to reassure Su Zelang. He really believed that Su Zelang would never betray Yang Liu.

But the incident was such a big deal that no matter what the truth was, Yang Liu had already suffered very serious mental damage.

Before that period of time, the death of her grandfather had already dealt a great blow to her. She never expected that misfortunes never come alone in this world.

During that period, she hardly ate or drank, cried every day, and fell into a very serious depression. Even medication could not relieve the symptoms during the attacks, and she became so thin that she looked unrecognizable.

Su Chengyi watched all this silently, but he also knew that as a young child at this moment, no matter what he said, it would be useless.

All I can do is stay with her and bring her a cup of hot water when necessary.

But in fact, thinking back, Su Zelang was also tortured.

At that time, he was just like Linghu Chong who was framed and wrongly accused. Overnight, he became a despised "scumbag".

In the end, Su Chengyi was caught between the two of them and was not having a good time.

From his position, he couldn't stand on either side, because no matter which side he chose to stand on at this time, it would be a betrayal of the other person.

So when they divorced, Su Chengyi resolutely chose to live on his own.

At that time, Yang Liu was actually ready to raise Su Chengyi alone, but Su Chengyi knew that only by completely getting away from that environment at that time could the mental trauma Yang Liu suffered be healed.

Because of these messy reasons, Su Chengyi said that:
“Everyone is a victim.”

When Su Chengyi was in middle school, he read a novel during his lunch break. The author wrote:

"We are all ordinary people. Over the years, we have loved and hated in a mess. What can we do?"

When he closed the book at that time, he felt a deep resonance. The four words "chaos" were the most suitable to summarize everything that had happened in those years.

It is the adolescence period that shapes one's values. Growing up in such an environment, it is difficult for Su Chengyi to form a normal view of love.

Therefore, his love life can only be described as "a mess".

(End of this chapter)