My Tokyo Love Game Has Big Problems

Chapter 189: Fear of change

Autumn passes and winter solstice passes, cold comes and summer comes.

In this era that does not belong to him, Tamaki Hikaru seems to have lost his grasp of time.

Often when I bury my head, I don’t know how many days have passed.

All life issues such as food, clothing, housing, and transportation were left to Yachiyo Yayoi and Flanders to take care of.

Tamaki Hikaru completely turned into a dead house who couldn't hear what was going on outside the window, nestling in the study.

Occasionally when I go out, I just go to the shrine in the mountains with various questions and conjectures to seek answers.

In such a life, Tamaki Hikaru never paid attention to the rising and setting of the sun and the changing of seasons.

It's rare to go out once, and it feels like there are no trees in the mountains, and it's so cold that you don't know the year.

He raised his hand to cover his eyes, but the bright sunshine was a bit dazzling at the moment.

I am afraid that in these long hundreds of years, I will gradually give up my original self and become another kind of person.

And compared with these costs, there are still some things weighing on Tamaki Hikaru's heart at the moment.

"Spring has arrived again, and I don't know if the camellias will bloom more lushly this year."

Tamaki Hikaru sighed and looked away.

This is also due to the hard work of a certain maid, who pruned these bonsai as if they were human bodies when she had nothing to do.

That is not to be a human being, as long as you are not a human being.

“It’s cold in spring and the wind is cool, so wear more layers to protect yourself from the wind.”

The most precious thing for people is the future, and the thing that people fear most is also the future.

Fast forward six years, but he still hasn't found a way.

Tamaki Hikaru suddenly coughed twice violently, and Yachiyo Yayoi patted his back caringly.

Tamaki Hikaru stretched his muscles that had not moved for a long time and walked out of the study.

Six years, six years, it seems to be a long time in short, but six years have passed in a blink of an eye.

What Tamaki Hikari is worried about is nothing else, but the inevitable "growth" of human beings.

It's really ridiculous. He is obviously such a happy-go-lucky person, but now he is very afraid of being happy-go-lucky like this.

"Are you going out? Do you need me to accompany you?"

The so-called demon god Astaroth in the Key of Solomon who can travel between the past and the future is nothing more than a false prophet.

"I don't plan to go out, I'm just a little tired and want to relax my eyes."

Time has left many traces on his body, which not only makes him appear more adapted to this era, but also adds to his age.

And what will he become in these hundred years?

He was afraid, afraid that he would become an annoying adult gradually, so he chose to go with the flow.

"I just thought about something and felt terrible."

"What year is this year?"

I sat down directly and saw a peaceful spring day, but not a bit happy.

So at this time, he was full of worries about the future and growth.

Astonishingly, Hikari Tamaki has been in this era for six or seven years.

There are several ways to achieve immortality, but they all have one thing in common.

People will grow and people will change.

If Tamaki Hikaru really finds the ideal method of immortality, he will still need to survive a hundred years before he can return to his original era.

This small price is nothing at all to some people who are crazy and paranoid in their pursuit of immortality.

Regardless of the so-called ideal or dream, how many people can actually realize it?

Not to mention how far apart my childhood self is from my current self?

Tamaki Hikaru is not an old man who has grown up after countless years.

From immaturity to maturity, from youthfulness to proficiency, from tightness to looseness.

"Why did you cough suddenly? Did you get cold from the wind?"

There are several bonsai plants planted in the courtyard, which are neatly trimmed without any gaps.

Although he is still young, he is no longer at the same stage as his previous self.

So Tamaki Hikaru refuses to adapt to this era, even if he is already subconsciously integrating into it.

Because no one knows what they will encounter in the next moment or what kind of person they will become.

If they looked more like siblings when they stood together with Yachiyo Yayoi before, they look even more like siblings now.

Yachiyo Yayoi took a thin haori and draped it on Tamaki Hikaru from behind.

Tamaki Hikaru naturally followed Yachiyo Yayoi's movements to put on the haori, and looked up at the new branches sprouting in the courtyard, his eyes a little dazed.

"Time? It's already the sixth year."

Tamaki Hikaru waved his hand, indicating that he was not that delicate.

Yachiyo Yayoi knelt down behind Tamaki Hikaru, stretched out her hand, gently pressed Tamashiro Hikari's temples, and slowly placed him on her lap.

"What are you afraid of? There is magic that can make everything come true, so what is there to be afraid of?"

While helping him soothe him, he also enlightened him with words.

In terms of caring, among the three women in the entire mansion, only Yachiyo Yayoi was the best.

The accumulated years not only made her vision sharper, but also made her understand more.

Tamaki Hikaru closed his eyes and peacefully enjoyed the girl's knee pillow and massage.

"Magic is not omnipotent, it is just an introduction."

Infinite possibilities also mean that Tamaki Hikaru must make unlimited efforts towards his goals.

He had already experienced a similar situation once, but he was a little unsure about whether he could persist the second time.

In the witch's courtyard, time stands still, and so does Tamaki Hikaru's growth.

He can have enough motivation and perseverance to sit in front of the typewriter and type continuously.

But now?

Tamaki Hikaru is not sure. Who can be sure that he will never change and will remain the same as he is now?

"Yayoi, do you think you have changed in all these years?"

"Huh? Change?"

Yachiyo Yayoi was stunned for a moment, then smiled.

"How could someone not change? Even I have experienced many different periods, and there is no real eternity in this world."

She was once an ordinary person. After eating mermaid meat, she felt excited, confused, and in pain, and finally she chose to give up thinking.

In the end, because of that sentence, a coincidence rekindled a little bit of self, and only then did Yayoi Yachiyo become what she is today.

"Yes, people will always change, so I worry that one day I will no longer be like myself now and do something I regret."

Tamaki Hikaru sighed, his eyes full of worry.

Yachiyo Yayoi's mind was sharp and she quickly understood the meaning of Tamaki Hikaru's words.

"You're just tired. Your nerves have been too tense in the past few years. Just relax a little and you'll be fine."

The movements in his hands were gentler, and the tips of his hair fell on Tamaki Hikari's ears, twitching slightly.

"I heard that some new Western bars have opened in Shinjuku recently, and they are holding pole dancing performances. Let's go and relax some other time." If you are unhappy and stressed, it is right to go out and have some fun.

She is not the jealous one like Aye. She is not happy here or not.

It would be better to say that if Tamaki Hikaru is really willing to indulge in debauchery, she would be the most supportive.

Having seen a lot, Yachiyo Yayoi is very open-minded about men's debauchery.

However, Tamaki Hikaru still shook his head and showed a wry smile.

"Yayoi, that's why I'm afraid. I know I'm putting pressure on myself, but I don't dare to relax."

This is like a so-called tired day, and you should reward yourself.

One tube a day, thirty tubes a month, rewarding every day doesn’t feel like a problem, and it becomes a habit over time.

In the beginning, Tamaki Hikari occasionally went out to play with Aye or Yachiyo Yayoi.

But then it gradually decreased, and I rarely went out anymore, only on special occasions.

After all, what Tamaki Hikaru cares about is the future, not the present.

The more they get along with each other, the more his thoughts will be shaken, but Tamaki Hikari cannot let go of them.

So this somewhat strange scene has emerged.

Although they live and eat together, they still have a tacit understanding and affection for each other.

But not only did he cross the thunder pool, but even the faint light of Yucheng revealed a feeling of alienation in his subconscious.

On weekdays, he shuts himself in the study and only spends part of the time with them.

This move really made Aye anxious and annoyed, but it was hard to say anything.

Yachiyo Yayoi had a smile on her lips. She seemed to be thinking of the scene of Aye jumping and couldn't help but laugh.

"I know what I know, and I know all your concerns."

"But in this case, aren't you worried about her being angry?"

Once or twice, Aye's patience is limited, and as she grows up, her desire for this matter will become deeper.

When you are young, you are content as long as the person you like is around, but as you grow older, this desire becomes more and more difficult to fill.

The desire to control and possessiveness expanded, as well as Aye's personal changes.

In the beginning, she had multiple aura filters for Tamaki Hikaru, and she was used to the relationship with Tamaki Hikari as the dominant one.

But after so many years, as the master of demons and monsters in Tokyo, even if she still shows some restraint, her personality has changed a lot.

She will become more proactive and want to take the initiative, instead of being the little vampire who did whatever Tamaki Hikari said in the beginning.

She is also growing, and growing faster.

Of course Tamaki Hikaru knows this, but what can he do?

"Oh, there's nothing she can do if she's angry. Maybe it's because of this that we will meet in the future."

Although cold treatment will be left to be solved later, heat treatment is not a problem either.

Gentle Township is the Tomb of Heroes. Once you take one step, you will be trapped in it and unable to extricate yourself.

In other words, if Tamaki Hikaru had a career, a family and even children in this era, would he still want to go back?

He stayed in this era for decades, but only lived for sixteen years in the future. Which one is more important?

So Tamaki Hikaru didn't dare to do anything more. If something really happened and he had children, he was afraid that he would change from now on.

Although he knew that Aye couldn't give birth, this was just a metaphor.

When people are entangled, they become weak.

If you leave ties in multiple places at the same time, you will become the person who is torn apart by five horses.

"You still think too much, why not be happy and not worry so much."

Yachiyo Yayoi smiled faintly and changed the subject.

"You say you are afraid of change, but why should you be afraid?"

"What you should be afraid of is not changes in yourself, but changes in a direction you don't like."

"It's like walking in the desert. You shouldn't be afraid that you're going the wrong way, but you should confirm the direction and go towards the path you want to take."

Tamaki Hikaru opened his eyes, and from his angle, he could see Yachiyo Yayoi looking at him gently.

Reaching out and pinching Tamaki Hikari's now somewhat mature face, Yachiyo Yayoi continued with a smile.

"You are always thinking about not putting yourself in a dilemma or doing something that you will regret."

"But aren't you already in a dilemma now, and how do you know whether you will regret it now in the future?"

Those words left Tamaki Hikari in a daze, Yachiyo Yayoi struck while the iron was hot and continued.

"So, you don't have to think about the future, just think about the present."

"Do what you most want to do now, what you should do most, and that will be enough."

"Rather than regretting in the future, let's not regret it now."

Yachiyo Yayoi suddenly raised her hand and pushed Tamaki Hikaru up.

Tamaki Hikaru was still a little confused and didn't know what she meant.

"Of course we're going to see the Western dancers, otherwise what else could we do?"

"Ok?"

Yachiyo Yayoi patted her sore thighs and stood up with a smile on her face.

"Think about it, if you go back one day, will it be a pity that you didn't see the most novel thing in the Taisho period, the most famous oiran?"

"Things between us may form a bond, and we may care about our hands and feet, but we can't have fun."

"You just want to travel, increase your knowledge, see new and interesting things, and relax your mind."

What he said was a bit unreasonable, and it also made Tamaki Hikaru's somewhat melancholy mood gradually improve.

And it does make people a little curious, what are the Western dancers of this era like?

Although in terms of entertainment culture and other aspects, this era is far inferior to the future.

But sometimes retro is also a kind of fun.

Tamaki Hikaru finally became interested and regained some joy in this sunny spring day.

"Well, let's go and have a look?"

"Of course, we have to do it as early as possible, otherwise it will be inconvenient when the guy comes back."

Yachiyo Yayoi also put on her coat and took Tamaki Hikaru's arm.

If we wait until night, Aye's jealous man comes back and hears that Tamaki Hikaru went out to see the dancers, and he will die in a hurry.

The two of them changed their clothes, covered their faces a little, and went out directly.

When going to a place like this, of course you have to dress up a little bit.

Nowadays, Aye has countless secret agents. Maybe someone who knows Tamaki Hikari knows about her secretly.

Yachiyo Yayoi curled her lips, silently making her own little calculation in her heart.

Just because you don’t fight doesn’t mean you don’t do anything.

Little vampire, you are still too young, please learn more.

(End of this chapter)