Crossing the line

Chapter 72 Do you believe it yourself?
She didn't even need him to love her very much, she just didn't want to share his love with anyone.

If his intentions were not only towards her but also towards others, she felt that she would not be able to bear it no matter how deep his love was.

Besides, he didn't love her much.

She never felt that he loved her very much.

If you can't feel it, it doesn't exist.

She has been deceiving herself for a long time and has gained experience. In fact, she can make judgments, but she loves him too much and always expects him to love her as well, so she makes mistakes that she hasn't made for a long time.

She just longs for someone to love her wholeheartedly, why can't she do that?
Even if she disappeared from this world at this moment, no one would be heartbroken and collapse in despair.

The days after losing parents are always like this.

She hadn't found the meaning of her existence for a long time.

So Yun Yuwan just smiled lightly at this moment: "I know."

She still wanted to leave, so she took a step forward and the moment her hand touched the door handle, Wen Yangzhi's big hand came over and gently held her hand.

Only then did I realize that her face was covered with tear marks and her tears were falling like rain.

It would have been fine if he hadn't come to stop her, but he couldn't even let her be decent at this moment, and Yun Yuwan's suppressed emotions suddenly burst out.

She used brute force to break free from him, even at the risk of hurting herself, and struggled along the sharp edge of the door frame. He was afraid of hurting her, so he let go of her hand.

Yun Yuwan pushed him, and although he didn't move at all, he could feel that she was using a lot of strength.

Yun Yuwan's eyes were red, and she couldn't help yelling at him: "I wanted to leave but you wouldn't let me go. It's not like you like me very much. If I hadn't suddenly come back and offered myself to you, you wouldn't have chosen me at all. The person you're interested in is obviously Zhou Fei!"

He frowned, feeling that her words were inexplicable: "I never liked Zhou Fei."

She was full of resentment and grievances, and the usually gentle person was as sharp as a knife at this moment:
"Yes, but you never told me that you like me. If it wasn't for what happened tonight, you wouldn't even say I love you. I love you should be said when you really mean it, not just to put me off and tell me not to cause trouble."

He looked at her hysterically, hugged her and held her in his arms: "I didn't prevaricate you, I never lie."

She cried until her whole face turned red. “But now I don’t want to be here, I don’t want to be with you.”

Just because of a necklace, she reacted so strongly. He was not a hot-tempered boy who wanted to fight with her to the death. He did not mean to blame her, he just wanted to know why.

Because he gave the emerald necklace directly to her without telling her that she had misunderstood, which embarrassed her, and he simply treated the necklace as if it was bought for her.

He wanted to know what she was thinking and why she had such a big reaction. He instinctively felt that it was not just because of the necklace:

"Why don't you want to stay with me?"

She just lowered her head and said nothing, her tears dripping onto his collar. They remained in a stalemate for a long time before her voice calmed down and the waves of pain and grievance in her chest completely subsided.
"Nothing, just let me be alone for a while."

He let her go, and she went upstairs alone without looking back.

Wen Yangzhi followed her and found her sitting on the balcony. She looked very tired. She sat on the ground, hugged her knees, and leaned her head on her knees.

It feels like there is no one to rely on and I can only lean on myself in a curled up position.

She sat on the balcony for a while. When he thought she was asleep and was about to hug her, she stood up as if nothing had happened, her thin body standing alone in the night wind.

She walked past him as if she didn't see him.

I took my clothes and went straight to take a shower.

She had just taken off her coat when Wen Yangzhi suddenly knocked on the door.

She slightly lowered the preheating shower water: "What's wrong?"

Wen Yangzhi opened the door directly, took off his coat and threw it into the sink, then began to unbutton his shirt. A deep, magnetic voice rang out:

"Wash together."

Yun Yuwan quickly closed the glass door and said, "Get out."

Wen Yangzhi opened the door expressionlessly.

Yun Yuwan sprayed him with the shower head, making his straight suit covered with water droplets. His shirt was soaked and stuck to his body. The water droplets flowed down his short jet-black hair and across his handsome face, but he hugged her from behind and wrapped her in his arms.

Yun Yuwan struggled: "I didn't say I wanted to take a shower with you."

She was soaked all over, and Wen Yangzhi's shirt was also wet, but the temperature was scorching. His broad arms wrapped around her and held her tightly.

The water flowed down his high nose and clear chin.

It's not that he can't, but it shouldn't be at this time. If he had come up to explain why he followed her as soon as he saw Zhou Fei wearing the necklace, she would be very happy tonight, but now is not the time for things to happen.

The warm embrace wrapped around her, and she felt at ease for a moment. She could feel his care, but she also knew that it would be against the facts to cut off ties with him. She had actually seen his true heart.

The strong contact and temperature proved that she was indeed being noticed.

But she didn't want to be paralyzed and ignore her wounds, so she just choked up and said, "I don't want to be with you anymore. I don't feel that you love me at all."

"I was wrong. What do you want? I'll give it to you now." Wen Yangzhi's voice was very low.

She didn't even dare to think that Wen Yangzhi would admit his mistake to her.

Yun Yuwan simply retreated into her shell and refused, "I don't want to pay attention to you now."

After a long time, the whole bathroom was filled with mist, and water droplets condensed on the glass and flowed down in streams. He let her go. Although he knew that her attitude had softened, he did not let her continue to be in a dilemma.

It was her own storm, and getting involved with other things would be more hurtful.

After taking a shower, Yun Yuwan went to bed and lay on the same bed with him, but she was far away from him, sleeping in the corner.

She turned her back to him and began to cry unconsciously, quietly, without even moving.

In fact, most of the time she didn't know what she was angry about.

She was originally the owner of the necklace, but she interfered. Wen Yangzhi chose her, but she just didn't want to see the necklace on another woman's neck.

As adults, it is normal for feelings to change.

Wen Yangzhi thought she was asleep and wanted to cover her with a blanket, but when he leaned over he found that she was crying.

"Still sad?"

She buried her head a little further into the pillow: "I don't know. I don't want to talk to you now."

Wen Yangzhi stood up and sat quietly for a long time: "Why don't you want to talk to me?"

Her voice was even calm, and she almost used self-torturing words to beg for his response: "Actually, you don't like me that much. If I didn't take the initiative to be with you this time, would you want to be with me?"

He didn't answer.

Yun Yuwan knew that it wouldn't happen. She pulled the corners of her lips reluctantly:

"I just want to find someone who will always like me and have an absolute preference for me. I don't want to guess or deceive myself into thinking that others love me. I can deceive myself for a short time, but over time, I can't even deceive the people around me."

She felt very sad: "You know, I don't have parents, so I really want to have my own family. I don't want a family where I can be replaced at will."

Her tears flowed from the corners of her eyes down her nose, and then from the tip of her nose to the pillow. "If you don't love me so absolutely, we should break up. Being siblings is more decent than being lovers. You don't have to waste so much time. I also want someone who truly loves me."

When she said the last sentence, she finally couldn't help choking up, feeling sad that there was no one who loved her passionately and wholeheartedly.

In this regard, Yang Ni's love is more impressive than Wen Yangzhi's.

At least Yang Ni ignored other people's eyes and always followed her, showing his preference for her with his own eyes.

Yun Yuwan knew that if she was in a relationship and he didn’t care about her as much as his friends did, then what was the point of this relationship?
It's ridiculous just to satisfy my unrequited love for six years.

"I really like you, but it's not enough for me to be the only one who likes you. I only want to like someone who likes me."

She felt Wen Yangzhi stand up. She also guessed it, and the hot tears flowed silently.

Maybe he also found it annoying to listen to, so it was better for him to go out so that she could calm down.

She breathed a sigh of relief.

Unexpectedly, Wen Yangzhi walked up to her, sat on the carpet in front of her, and looked at her deeply with his dark eyes:
"what would you like?"

She subconsciously stepped back and kept some distance.

He looked at her straight in the eyes, his aura calm and resolute: "Now go back to the old house and tell Zhao Qin and Wen Wei that I am in love with you and don't want you to marry me. Is that enough?"

She just smiled bitterly, tears streaming down her temples: "Can you? Your last name is Wen, you should get married."

He gave her a firm answer: "I have never thought about marriage."

But she was not so naive: "Even if you have never thought about it, you still want to get married."

Wen Yangzhi's voice was cold, yet calm as always: "I'm in this position. If I don't want to, no one can force me to do it."

She just chuckled.

Wen Yangzhi seemed to be unable to do anything with her, and his tone finally softened helplessly: "I don't know what you are thinking, tell me."

She buried her head in the pillow. "I don't want anything."

He brushed his hand across her cheek, wiping away her tears: "If you don't have what you want, why are you crying tonight?"

She said in a muffled voice: "You seem to be more suitable to be my brother, not my boyfriend."

Wen Yangzhi's heart felt like it was being stabbed by a sharp blade and twisted lightly: "What's not suitable?"

“It just doesn’t fit.”

"Yun Yuwan, it's been six years since you came back, and as soon as you came back you wanted to separate from me." There were many emotions in his eyes that she couldn't understand.

Yun Yuwan thought it was ridiculous: "You are obviously doing well and you don't miss me that much, otherwise why didn't you send me a message?"

Behind him was the cold night outside the window. His voice was calm, but it contained many emotions that she didn't know about: "I always thought that my sister would come back after she graduated from college, after she had enough fun, and after she graduated from her master's degree. But it's been almost a year since she graduated from her master's degree, and she doesn't seem to have any intention of coming home."

She doesn't speak.

Wen Yangzhi took the cigarette from the table next to him, put his long fingers together to light it, and looked at her for a long time:
"Tell me what you want. If you don't tell me, sometimes I won't understand."

She looked at him and suddenly mocked him: "What you said makes me feel like you really came to see me when you came to Belgium for Christmas that year."

But he admitted calmly: "I came to find you."

Yun Yuwan felt pathetic. He had said "I love you" to comfort her, which was pathetic enough for her. Now he lied to her: "I know that you are cooperating with a Belgian steel company recently. You went there to discuss cooperation that time."

He stared at her and said word by word, "Europe is the most holiday-conscious. Who do you think would fly over there on Christmas to do business with Europeans? If you hadn't posted on WeChat Moments on Christmas Eve saying that no one was spending Christmas with you, I wouldn't have flown over there overnight."

But she heard it but didn't answer.

He didn't know what she wanted to hear, and rarely explained his behavior: "I bought that pair of rings, not because you misunderstood and took them away, but because you wanted them, so I bought them, and you were happy wearing them, so I didn't tell you where they came from."

But she just lost her temper: "President Zhou and you are a perfect match!"

"Stop it." He put the cigarette into the ashtray and put it out. "You are my sister. There is no one in this world who is more suitable for me than you."

His eyes were only on her, under the lonely light: "I sent you a letter from thousands of miles away, not to hear you come back and quarrel with me."

She just remembered the letter, but she actually didn't know what was written in it. It was just that when someone said it, she tried her best to cheer herself up and flew over overnight.

Yun Yuwan pulled up the quilt to cover her face: "But I want someone who likes me more."

She heard Wen Yangzhi's voice outside the quilt, and a hand gently fell on her head which was not completely covered by the quilt: "No one will love you more than me."

She just felt her nose ache: "I can't feel anything at all."

His voice remained calm as always: "No one in this world cares about you more than I do."

She choked back: "Do you believe it yourself?"

In fact, she didn't believe it, and that was right.

Because he showed very little.

To be honest, when he first saw her, he felt a little disgusted.

The first day she moved in, he noticed that she looked like a girl character from a comic book.

Her voice was soft, like a ball of sweet marshmallow, just like the voice described in anime.

He also felt that she was being fake. How could someone talk like that?

Big eyes and a little baby fat.

It makes people have an evil desire to pinch her soft and white face hard.

I just handed her a pair of chopsticks and said "Thank you, brother~~"

But it looked just like the comics he read, and exactly like his favorite characters.

It's like this when he really speaks. When he runs, he runs like a happy puppy, and his hair flies in the air and bounces around like an elf.

It was exactly the same as the ideal type he had imagined when he was a teenager, the kind of ideal type that shouldn't exist in reality.

A character that is too perfect would seem exaggerated and unreal when it appears in real life. Wen Yangzhi didn't think she was cute, he just thought she was pretending.

All the eyes that fell on her were examining, trying to find her flaws.

But he didn't fully understand that year. Yun Yuwan was a little girl who grew up being spoiled. Every time she acted like a spoiled child unconsciously was just a little girl's nature.

Because of her background, he hated Wen Wei's inaction and the falling apart of their family. Wen Wei was even raising the daughter of her former dream lover. With such a preconceived impression, he subconsciously classified her into the category of pretentious people.

But she is always in trouble.

Watching her release river lanterns during the Mid-Autumn Festival, she was so stupid that she almost fell on the shore and almost knocked him down. He impatiently grabbed her and told her to stand still.

She was stunned for a moment, then immediately raised her head and smiled at him foolishly, her round eyes condensed into stars, as if he was some great hero.

His hand on her shoulder paused.

Look at her squatting alone near the altar, pulling weeds out of boredom and stupidity.

That was the mint that my great-grandfather planted when he was still alive.

He felt his temples throbbing and frowned. He asked someone to call her over, lit three incense sticks for her, and asked her to wait quietly by the side.

Occasionally, I heard discussions among the other relatives. How could they really raise her as a daughter? It was probably because Zhao Qin only gave birth to one child and was lacking a daughter for marriage.

Seeing that she still looked silly and knew nothing, I suddenly felt that she was really dull.

He was a little angry for no reason.

After burning incense, in front of everyone, he introduced the daughter of Wen Wei's dream lover to the ancestors.
"This is my sister Yuwan."

He deliberately made his eyes and voice gentle, so that everyone could see, and said to her: "It's getting late, burn incense."

The green grass stain on the little fool's hands has not faded yet. It seems that she doesn't understand anything and doesn't know anything. She can't even figure out that she is being bullied, yet she still goes to play in the mud and pull weeds.

　The second dimension crazy man and the necklace crazy woman

　　
　
(End of this chapter)