Alice in the Land of Steam

Chapter 783: Is the future confusing?
"I'm sorry." Sister Livia's voice was as soft as a whisper, but it sounded so clear in this empty and desolate hall that Carabosse could clearly hear the confusion and determination in her tone. She was confused about her future fate, but she was determined about her current choice: "I may disappoint your kindness, but... I still can't join the Witch Society."

Karabos's expression did not change. Perhaps she had known the result long ago, or perhaps she felt that no matter what answer Livia gave, whether it was an agreement or a rejection, it was reasonable, so there was no need to be surprised or regretful. She just asked one more question out of curiosity: "Why? This is beneficial to both you and the True Spirit Sect, and what was your reason for rejecting my invitation?"

"No particular reason."

Sister Livia whispered, "I just don't want to go against my own conscience."

Karabos showed an understanding expression, and then smiled helplessly. If Livia said that she didn't want to betray the True Spirit Sect, then she could use "It was the True Spirit Sect that betrayed you first" to convince the other party, but unfortunately the nun said that she didn't want to go against her own heart, which is a very rare thing, because if a person says this, it means that he at least knows what his true heart is, and such a person is exactly the most difficult to convince.

The Dark Witch sighed sincerely: "It's a pity that you stay in the True Spirit Sect."

If the Witch Society had discovered this unpolished gem ten years earlier, perhaps today, there would be another philosopher among the highest ranks. However, while the Ring of Humanity gave this nun kindness and rationality, it also bound her in a vicious circle of faith, fate, deception and self-reconciliation. Perhaps it would take her a long time to get out, and she could only rely on her own efforts and could not get help from others.

"I don't feel sorry." Sister Livia showed a sad smile, her face was so pale that it made people feel distressed. "Despite so many things that have happened, being a believer of the True Spirit Sect is still the luckiest thing in my life in the past 20 years, because I did not decide to convert to the protection of the Trinity under the guidance of others, but my faith was born in the process of following my father and mother to the church to attend Sunday prayers in my childhood, following the old lady in the choir to learn to sing psalms praising the Holy Spirit in my youth, and growing up with other brothers and sisters who have the same ideals in adulthood. Sometimes I feel confused, sometimes I feel uneasy and afraid because of reality, but these are normal human emotions, and after experiencing so many hardships and twists and turns, today I can finally say: If some people think that their beliefs belong to God, then I think that all the pious and compassionate beliefs of me and my soul belong to me."

She spoke clearly and word by word, as if she was summarizing the life of the deceased at a funeral. During this process, Carabosse just listened silently without interrupting. Finally, Sister Livia finished speaking. She raised her head slightly and took a last look at the rugged and steep rock wall outside the dome. She could no longer hear the sound of fighting from the distant battlefield. The battle was probably over, and there was no need to say more about the victory or defeat. In her heart, she imagined that this rock wall had been silently watching this underground abandoned city for thousands of years. Did it witness countless noble souls dissipating here and the good years that had once disappeared? She mourned for the brothers and sisters who died quietly in this underground world, including Brother Mufasa who concealed the truth; she was also happy for the city residents who had no idea what happened that night, and wished them that they would never be involved in the same incident in their lives. The struggle between faith and gods will always be carried out in the darkness that they cannot reach...

When all these prayers and blessings left her mind, she felt for the first time that her soul was so relaxed and free of burden. In a lucid state, she once again heard the voice that she had not heard for a long time since the end of her childhood. It was like many people whispering in her ears, and it was like the soul of the Son Gabriel was beside her ear, whispering to her: Now is the time to return to the Kingdom of the Lord.

"Please send me back to the lightless sea above," she whispered.

This is the original version of the animistic system about death. It is said that every soul will rise to the sky after death, but it does not enter the so-called heaven of the Lord, but washes away the dirt of the world in a dark ocean without light and obtains a pure sleep. It is said that the darkness is the holy land where the great Virgin stayed before the creation of the world, and it is also the cradle of all life. The soul wanders in it, just like soaking in the mother's amniotic fluid, dark and warm; until a certain moment, the world calls for their arrival, so they are born like babies leaving the mother's womb and see the light again.

She did not want to return to the Lord's Kingdom, but rather wanted to return to the lightless sea above the sky, because her faith belonged to no one but herself.

Although she was just a replica of the young queen, Carabosse didn't mind treating her as a real sister. She believed that her other sisters thought so too, because they were like this a long time ago. Unfortunately, time and fate have changed a lot, but she couldn't change the person's own thoughts.

But this version only has the Virgin Mary, without saints and the Holy Spirit, and cannot form the concept of the Trinity. Therefore, it was abandoned by animists and erased from various scriptures without leaving any trace. However, even if a pious soul has never read the records in the scriptures, it can still feel the call from the lightless sea at the destined moment. This may be the key to return home left by a kind mother for every child, and this is the case with Sister Livia at this moment.

"I'm so sorry." She whispered, "I could have had a sister like you. I don't actually hate your innocence and kindness."

Animists believe that everything in the world has a spirit, and when life dies and plants wither, their spirits do not dissipate, but return to a kingdom in heaven, where they are baptized by the Virgin Mary, saints and the Holy Spirit, transformed into another eternal form, and live a carefree life from then on. Therefore, at funerals presided over by animists, the most common phrase the pastor says is: May you return to the kingdom of the Lord.

However, Livia slowly closed her eyes and let herself fall into a drowsy darkness. This darkness was warm and gentle, like the loving embrace of a mother since the creation of the world.

Carabos looked at the girl quietly, and saw that her head was slightly tilted up, outlining a stubborn arc. The skin on her neck was as transparent as a grape leaf soaked in sunlight in midsummer, so that one could clearly see the blood vessels flowing slowly underneath. The cyan and red colors wrapped around her life proved that this girl was born a human being, not a saint, a god, or some other messy thing. Moving his eyes upward, he saw that her pale face was calm, her smooth and flat forehead was covered by golden bangs, and her sweat was as clear and pure as a gem. Her long eyelashes were trembling slightly, conveying to people a kind of spirituality and warmth from the Creator.

Maybe you'd be better off looking for them.

Karabosse couldn't help wanting to say this, but at the last moment she held back and didn't say it, because she knew that some things could be said, but some things absolutely could not be said.

Sister Livia pursed her lips even tighter, her thin, bloody lips arousing pity. In the darkness, she vaguely felt a hand reaching out to her chest, pressing it against her chest, and then gently piercing her heart, but strangely, it didn't hurt, instead, a sense of relief reverberated in her mind.

Ah, she couldn't help but think: Is this death?
The past scenes were coming to her mind: scenes of playing as a child, attending church services with her parents, being baptized in the church, singing hymns in the choir, distributing food to the poor, offering a bunch of carnations to the tombstones of her parents and the old lady in the cemetery, and praying devoutly with her hands folded under the statue in the cathedral... It is said that the jugglers in Trafalgar Square tirelessly sold tickets to passers-by to watch the kaleidoscope. Through the narrow lens, you can see the colorful world in your eyes. Livia has never played such a game, but now she has made up for this regret. A new understanding suddenly came to her mind: it turns out that death is colorful. The hand slowly withdrew and took something from her body. It must be something very important. The nun felt empty and helpless for a while. But Livia thought to herself, take whatever you want, anyway, I am dead, and the dead will not care about such things. When the kaleidoscope-like colors before your eyes fade into darkness, you will enter the lightless sea of ​​the Virgin Mary and attain eternal sleep.

But she waited for a long time but never got to that moment. The colors in the darkness became brighter. Livia was confused. She moved tentatively, and her hand touched the wound on her abdomen. She cried out in pain. Then she opened her eyes and saw a desolate temple, with flying dust and scattered tables and chairs. Across an aisle covered by sad candlelight, the broken statues of all spirits were quietly looking at her on the altar. Their images were taken from all things in nature, including birds and beasts, plants and rocks, but they were given human-like external qualities. Some held scriptures as if reciting, while others opened their arms to embrace all living things. They were in different shapes and lifelike.

Sister Livia's gaze slowly moved downwards and landed on a figure below the statue, where the candlelight was the brightest. Her back outlined a tall and slender figure in the swaying halo. It seemed that she was a woman?
Is death a reincarnation?

She couldn't help but think that at this moment, the figure under the altar slowly opened her left hand, and a ball of shining white fire was burning in the palm of her hand. The light was blazing and sacred, forming a sharp contrast with the dim and fluctuating candlelight around it.

"That is..." The nun opened her mouth wide, feeling that the flame gave her a familiar feeling.

"The Soul of the Holy Son Gabriel." Carabosse said, "I will accept it. Don't worry, the Society has a strict and complete containment strategy for this dangerous sealed object. From now on, you probably don't have to worry about it appearing in your life, Miss Livia."

Livia was stunned for a long time before she reacted. She subconsciously said, "But, but, won't you kill me?"

"I never said I was going to kill you."

Carabosse said calmly, "In this incident, you are a simple victim. You are here because you were deceived and implicated. Our Witch Society is not so extreme as to hold the victim accountable. Moreover, from today on, you are no longer the Holy Son of the True Spirit Sect. You are just an ordinary human being and pose no threat to us. You are free, Miss Livia, to do what you want. Of course, if you still want to stand on the opposite side of us, it is not impossible, but I will not show mercy the next time we meet."

The witch took back the burning white fire in her hand, and paused for a moment when she turned around. She suddenly lowered her voice and said, with a tone that sounded like a warning and a blessing: "Don't worry about your future, and don't be confused about it. When people live in this world, there will always be a time when they must make a choice. The only important thing is not to leave any regrets for yourself."

"I wish you a worry-free journey, Miss Livia."

As soon as she finished speaking, her figure was instantly covered by the darkness spreading from the corner and merged into the dark water. When the tide gradually receded and shrank back into the corner, the witch's figure had disappeared from Livia's sight, and the original stone inscription of "The Beginning of Spirituality" by Saint Tumi on the altar also disappeared.

When the dust settled, the hall suddenly fell into a long silence. Only the sound of the candle burning was still echoing, drowning out the nun's slow and confused breathing. After a few minutes, she seemed to come to her senses, holding her abdomen that was no longer bleeding, and stood up from the pool of blood with difficulty. She held the wall beside her and limped out of the temple. She walked through the broken square, the dilapidated wall, the desolate tower group, the bleak courtyard... and followed a corridor occupied by spider silk, ants and stone lizards, leaving the ruins of the All Saints' Gospel Monastery, and once again stood in the square outside the church. The ancient square where believers once went on pilgrimage was deeply bent by the heavy darkness and sank ten centimeters. Many weeds and mosses grew from the cracks, drowning the traces of people passing by.

Livia stood here, looking down at the ruins of the entire city. All that was reflected in her eyes was an empty and desolate scene.

Ten thousand years ago, if there were still survivors in the city of Ardes standing in her position after the natural disaster, they would probably have seen the same scene. Destiny transcends time and space and has never changed.

Sister Livia's battle with the dark witch Carabosse was over, as was the battle between the True Spirits led by Brother Mufasa and the Crusaders. She and they all lost to powerful enemies, but the reasons for their defeat were different. Countless souls died here for the same absurd reason, leaving the same sigh before death as the ancestors of ancient times. Only Livia was an exception: she should have died long ago, but now she has returned to the world.

In those gray and white buildings, under the streets buried with miserable corpses, in the dark depths of ancient Lundu... the future is unpredictable.

"Although I have to make a choice..."

The bitter and sad voice of the nun floated in the wind of the underworld: "But where can I go?"

　Give me some meow
　　
　
(End of this chapter)