sorry i got lost

It seems that there is a sign of Calvin... (Watching the sky)

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Zhang Taiping had a dream.

A very long dream.

In the dream, he replayed everything he had seen from childhood to adulthood... cross talk sketches over and over thousands of times...

Zhang Taiping felt that he was about to collapse.

When he watched Uncle Benshan's "Selling Abductees" for the thousandth, 320 and seven times in his dream, he suddenly felt as if he had fallen into the water, and it was difficult to breathe, and then his consciousness became more and more blurred, more and more...

"Abducted!" Zhang Taiping woke up from the coma sweating profusely, threw off the wet towel covering his face, and panted heavily.

"You woke up...a ​​bit late..." Said the king of Kai who was drinking tea with regret.

"How long have I slept?" Zhang Taiping asked, wiping the cold sweat off his brow.

"Six years...you missed a lot of things..."

Then the king of the world told Zhang Taiping what had happened in the past six years, and finally shook his head and sighed: "It would be great if you could wake up earlier."

"So, the teacher is already dead?" Zhang Taiping frowned, "I just woke up and there is no good news. From this point of view, I have to go to Namek."

"Let me help you ask Wukong and the others if they have set off."

King Kai used the "antenna" on his head to communicate with Monkey King for a while.

"Bulma, Kobayashi, and Gohan have already rushed to Namek in the spaceship that God came to Earth, but Goku asked Bulma's father to build a spaceship just in case, and it is estimated that it will take more than 20 days to complete it. During this period of time, you will learn the Lower Realm King Fist from me!"

"Uh...Okay, but I'll go to Yama to say hello to the teacher first." Zhang Taiping started to teleport after speaking.

The king of the realm suddenly stopped him: "By the way, I've always been curious and wanted to ask."

"what?"

"Zhao Benshan, who is it?"

"Eh?"

"You called Zhao Benshan by the name six thousand seven hundred and thirty three times when you were in a coma."

"...he is a sketch actor that I like very much."

"There is another person named Yu Qian who you called 860 four times."

"what?"

"Fifty-three thousand eight hundred and sixty four times... This Yu Qian must owe you a lot of money." (Note 860)

“啊啊啊啊！！不要让我再想起那个相声小品地狱了啊啊啊啊啊！！！！”张太平360度抱头打滚捶地中。

……

Zhang Taiping stayed with the King of the World for more than 20 days, and learned both the King of the World Fist and the Vitality Ball. Although he learned it quickly, because he did not have the blood of the Saiyans, the King of the World Fist It can barely be opened to 3 times, and if it is blessed with superpowers, it can be opened to about 7 times.However, even with the 7 times Realm King Fist, it is not as powerful as Sun Wukong's 5 times now. The Saiyan's bloodline that will be upgraded if they are not killed is too heaven-defying.

Just when Zhang Taiping was thinking about whether to get some Monkey King's genes to strengthen himself, the King of the Realm hurried over.

"The spaceship has been built, but now there is a very scary guy on Namek named Frieza, you must not provoke him then!"

"Don't worry, I hate fighting the most."

Zhang Taiping shook his hand to show that he understood, then he moved away in a flash.

When several consecutive teleports came to Monkey King, Bulma's father was teaching him how to control the spaceship.

"Yo! Long time no see!"

"Taiping, you are here! Just in time, ready to go!"

"Oh! Our journey is the sea of ​​stars!!!" Zhang Taiping clenched his fists and shouted above his head.

"Oh!" Sun Wukong cheered and asked, "What do you mean?"

……

No one should be interested in two men sweating in the small space of the spaceship, so we will skip it for a while.

Six days later, the spacecraft finally landed on Namek.

During the six days, Sun Wukong's 15 times gravity training, Zhang Taiping miraculously survived together. With the full blessing of superpowers, he can already use 10 times the Kaiwangquan, but even so, he still can't hit 10 times. The Sun Wukong of the Double Realm King Fist, on the other hand, uses the [-]-fold Realm King Fist, and when he is harassed with super powers, he can support Monkey King for a longer period of time.

"Oh, Xiao Lin seems to be about to kneel." As soon as he got out of the spaceship, he felt three near-death breaths not far away, one of which Zhang Taiping recognized as Xiao Lin's, and the other two should be Bei who hadn't met yet. Geeta and Son Gohan are gone. "I have an impression of this episode. It seems to be some kind of funny team. The captain will switch bodies."

Thinking of this, Zhang Taiping scanned the surrounding area, captured a bug with his super power, and put it into the test tube he carried with him just in case.

"Well, take back and study the creatures on this planet." Zhang Taiping explained to the puzzled Monkey King, and then grabbed him and teleported towards the dying Xiao Lin.

After arriving at the destination, let Xiao Lin and the others eat the fairy beans first, then Zhang Taiping patted Monkey King on the shoulder: "The important task of saving the world and maintaining peace is entrusted to you!"

"Taiping, you're awake!" Xiao Lin came over to say hello.

"Yeah, this is Wukong's child?"

"Hello, Uncle Taiping."

"Uncle... Uncle..." Zhang Taiping petrified.

"Uncle, what's wrong with you?"

"Not Uncle!" Zhang Taiping roared, teleported to Wuhan, pulled his cheek and said, "I want to call you brother! Did you hear that!"

"Yes...Brother Taiping...Brother"

"Why don't we help? The enemy is very powerful!" Kobayashi came over and slapped away the hand that was ravaging Gohan's cheek, and asked.

"Ah, ah, ah, Wukong is fine...Look, it's solved."

"It was knocked down with one punch..."

"Well, the other two are also for food delivery, and Wukong doesn't even have to shed a drop of sweat." Zhang Taiping took out a few test tubes while talking, and began to collect the soil and water sources of Namek.

"Uh, Taiping, what are you doing?"

"Make some backups, and when I go back, I will study why the Namekians can create Dragon Balls." Zhang Taiping explained: "I once collected the teacher's blood and cells, and found that apart from a special regenerative ability, there is no Nothing special, so I wonder if it's because of the living environment."

"Sure enough...it's a clerical worker..." Xiao Lin sighed with his forehead.

While talking here, Monkey King over there released another person, and the other person saw that the situation was not good, so he ran away.

After that, Broomhead Cup Tower published a big article on the theory of Sofa Resolute Super Saiyan, the theory of Frieza is really awesome, and the theory of I want to use dragon balls to seek longevity.By the way... Isn't this guy really a fellow with secondary syndrome who traveled through time?

"Let me tell you..." Zhang Taiping really couldn't stand the disastrous second-year speech, so he planned to treat him for Internet addiction. "Although Dragon Ball can revive people, there is an exception for people who have died of old age, so it is impossible for you to ask for immortality. At most, let him help you restore youth when you are old. As for the immortal body... Do you think that if Dragon Ball can really do this kind of thing, then Will the Meike people fall to the point where they are almost wiped out by you?"

"This..." Beijuta found himself completely unable to refute Zhang Taiping's words.

The other three also looked thoughtful.

"So, the IQ of the characters in Akira Toriyama's works will not exceed 30...well, the time traveler is an exception!"

Zhang Taiping suddenly felt a sense of superiority in IQ spontaneously.

"So what if I can become a Super Saiyan? Intelligence is flawed!"

Of course Zhang Taiping would never say this.

Just when Cup Tower realized that what he was after was nothing more than a dream, and planned to cut off the three thousand broom heads (mistake) and escape into the empty door (big mistake), everyone realized that the guy who had escaped before had returned, and With him was a guy with a strong breath.Soon, the long-haired guy followed a strange-looking guy to everyone.

Because he was afraid that the dragon ball would be invalid after Frieza killed the elder, Sun Wukong asked Kobayashi and Gohan to get the dragon ball.

"Let Vegeta go together," Zhang Taiping suggested: "If you don't let him try, he probably won't give up, and he can take care of Gohan and the others by the way."

Cup Tower snorted and flew away with Kobayashi and Gohan by default.

"Are you really sure that Shenlong can't fulfill his wish?" Sun Wukong asked uncomfortably.

Zhang Taiping shrugged his shoulders and did not answer. To make a wish on a Namek dragon, you must use the Namek language. I will tell you casually about this kind of thing.

Monkey King confronted the curious captain, and Zhang Taiping, a lazy guy, of course went to squeeze the persimmon.

First use the super power to fix the long hair, then Zhang Taiping teleported in front of him with a double dragon play ball, and then followed up with a broken child and grandson's feet, that guy knelt down, Zhang Taiping used this combo more and more smoothly .After casually refilling the energy cannon to make the thing ashes, Zhang Taiping took out the sofa drinks and snacks from the universal capsule that he carried, and sat aside to watch the show.

The two fought in the sky for a while, and they didn't know what to say. Sun Wukong began to run the Kaiwang Fist with all his strength, while the captain of the hunting team used the monocle mirror to measure Wukong's combat power with a look of surprise.Afterwards, the two of them said something else, Captain Hunting smiled confidently again, poked his chest with his backhand, and then used the body swap technique on Monkey King, and then Zhang Taiping instantly snapped the worm he had prepared long ago. Move between the two, and then...there is no more.

The battle that was supposed to take a lot of time ended in such a hasty way. Regarding Sun Wukong's question about his unknown prophecy, Zhang Taiping casually flickered over, and then the two rushed to the place where Xiao Lin and others were going.

Arriving at Frieza's spaceship, I happened to see Kobayashi and the others helpless with the Dragon Balls. After questioning, I learned that the calling method of the dragons on Namek was different from that on Earth. Of course, Zhang Taiping, who knew about it, would not take the initiative to say so. of.So after a short rest in the spaceship, Xiao Lin was sent to the Great Elder to inquire about the method of summoning, while Zhang Taiping circled around in the spaceship, constantly analyzing the technology in the spaceship with superpowers.

After a while, Kobayashi came back with a little Namek named Dandy.

"Eh? Is it enough to use the Namekian language? Then I can... I learned it from my teacher when I was bored." Zhang Taiping made an afterthought.

After chatting a few words, Dandy called Shenlong out.

Your friend "King of the World" is online.

After Shenlong appeared, Kaiwang also used telepathy to join in the fun.

Then three wishes.

The first is used to revive Piccolo.

The second wish threw the piccolo into an unknown corner of Namek.

The third……

Zhang Taiping pointed at the cup tower, 【Give this guy an immortality. ] (The following [] are all in Namekian language)

"I can't do this kind of thing."

"Look." Zhang Taiping shrugged his shoulders at Cup Tower.

"hateful!"

【Then make these three Saiyans evolve into Super Saiyans! ] Zhang Taiping made another wish, while Dandy was translating at the same time.

"I can't do this kind of thing."

"Damn it!" Trapped tower who was hit again felt that he was a tragedy, but in fact he was a tragedy. (Note 2)

【Then kill Frieza directly? 】

"I can't do this kind of thing."

"Cut! Sure enough, no matter whether it is the dragon of Earth or the dragon of Namek, they are all unscrupulous?" Zhang Taiping, who has always been very resentful towards the dragon, curled his lips.

Just when everyone was thinking about what wish to make, the sky suddenly returned to daylight, and Dragon Ball completely turned into stone.

"The Great Elder passed away..." Dan Di said with a sad face.

"Oh!" Zhang Taiping suddenly slapped his head.

"what happened?"

"After staying with you for a long time, my mind has also become dull," Zhang Taiping said with a gloomy face, "I should have let Shenlong throw Frieza directly into the sun just now!"

"Indeed, I'm not sure I'll survive the sun." A cold voice came from not far away.

"Frieza!" Cup Tower yelled in horror.

"Monkey King! It's up to you!" Zhang Taiping waved his hand and said vigorously.

"Oh!"

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Note 1: Everyone should know Stephen Chow's "Journey to the West"?In the original lines, there are 98 times of Jingjing and 784 times of Zixia. The latter is 8 times that of the former. There should be no one who can see this stalk -v-

Note 2: All reactionaries are cup emperors!When the cup tower was recruited, Leping was given to NTR immediately, although Bulma... ahem!

ps: Let’s talk about Dragon Ball. According to the manga, Dragon Ball cannot accomplish things beyond the creator’s ability, but bringing the dead back to life and restoring the destroyed new ball has long been beyond the ability of the Namekians!Because Akira Toriyama slapped his own face so loudly, I set the scope of Dragon Ball’s ability casually, but Zhang Taiping’s wish to grant the Cup Tower an immortal body is still ill-considered. I feel that I was brainwashed by cross talk sketches After six years, my brain will become dull no matter what I do. If I don’t become mentally retarded, I’m already very powerful, although I have always had a tendency to write the protagonist as a fool...