Ping An Biography

Chapter 134 Losing the Sense of Belonging

Zhao Erniang brought people to the Yuanshui tea garden, and said to see who I brought here as if asking for credit. Only then did Zhang Ning find out that Fang Ling and Peach Blossom Fairy had also arrived here, and immediately praised Zhao Erniang, neither blame nor blame. www: Read the novel Last month, Zhang Ning asked someone to take a letter to Chunhan Liyuan. Of course, he didn’t want to take Fang Ling over; It is suitable for women to be around and care about... But people have come from far away, what else can they do, can't they be driven away immediately?

When the people arrived at Changde Mansion, according to Zhang Ning's plan, the list was first compiled, the upper and lower organizations were established, and then they discussed with several important people to make detailed arrangements.But now something unexpected happened, he planned to receive Fang Ling first, and postpone other matters until tomorrow.Zhang Ning went to Chunhan Liyuan a few times, Fang Ling and the others received them personally and were enthusiastic about everything; now that they are here, Zhang Ning should personally entertain them and ask about their board and lodging.

They were first taken to the back garden to put their luggage and rest for a while, and then they went to a pavilion in the garden near Yuanshui to meet Zhang Ning to reminisce about the old days.The Peach Blossom Fairy threw away her things and didn't care about anything else. She was busy asking people to fetch water, take a bath, change clothes, and dress up.Seeing this, Fang Ling couldn't help feeling a smile on the ground.

When it comes to meeting each other, although they are acquaintances, etiquette is still indispensable.When they greeted each other, Peach Blossom Fairy was just about to cup her fists and put her hands together as usual, when she suddenly remembered what Fang Ling said, "Slow down and you will look soft", so she blushed and slowly folded her hands on her lower abdomen , lowered his eyes, slightly bent his knees and made a blessing.

Seeing this, Zhang Ning stood there in a daze, unable to react, always feeling that something was wrong, and after a while, he quickly got up and made a gesture of support: "Fairy don't need to be too polite...I feel like I'm sitting on pins and needles for such a great gift... Is it not acclimatized, where is it uncomfortable?"

Fang Ling held back for a while, and finally couldn't help covering her mouth and laughing out loud.

Zhang Ning said casually: "It's not an outsider, don't pretend, it's good and refreshing as usual."

Peach Blossom Fairy was very embarrassed at first, but she was laughed at kindly again, and she blushed and said, "Oh, I'm pretending, I see that you are pretending to be decent, and it seems to be true every time you come and go. Respect each other like a guest?"

It’s okay if she didn’t mention it. Zhang Ning really felt that Fang Ling’s attitude had changed a lot this time after breaking it a little bit. The etiquette was more thoughtful, more respectful and obedient, and less intimate. Yes, there are a lot of birth points.

After they talked about the purpose of the trip, Zhang Ning suddenly realized that Fang Ling was the contact person sent by Jianwen.The response speed of Jianwen's party members was very fast. Not long after they wrote a letter to disclose the news, they quickly made arrangements.He also heard that the person in charge of contacting and cooperating with him was "Mrs. Yao". Zhang Ning felt a little more anticipation. He was already looking forward to receiving a letter from "Mrs. Yao". fragrant.

Since the two of Fang Ling were on errands, Zhang Ning planned to let them settle down first.There is a separate courtyard behind the garden, which is the private courtyard where Zhang Ning and his family live. He personally took Fang Ling and Peach Blossom Fairy there to arrange a place for them.This side is facing the water, and there is a high wall to separate the noise of the tea garden. It is a relatively quiet place, just in time for them to rest for a while after a long ride; and the back door of this yard does not allow visitors, so when Fang Ling delivers the news There is also a certain degree of concealment.

After finishing all these things, it was nearly dusk, so Zhang Ning had dinner with Lao Xu and the others, and stayed in the Yuanshui Garden after eating, not going back to the office.

Normally, Zhang Ning often lives in the guest house next to the Yamen of Changde Mansion, because Wu Yong and others also live there, so he said that it would be degrading for an official to live in the tea garden, and he stayed in the hotel with Wu Yong, but in fact he didn't want Wu Yong to stay in the hotel. If Yong gets involved too much in the business, it is equivalent to crowding out Wu Yong.

He can't do anything about it, as the official in charge of this matter, he has contacts with the "chaotic party"; if he doesn't pay attention to precautions in advance, how will it end if Wu Yong sees something wrong after a long time?Right now Zhang Ning is still at a loss, worrying about everything, worrying too much... This is probably the source of mental stress.

Fang Ling brought Yao Ji's news, and he thought more about his situation.Right now, the identity of officials must be protected. This kind of status can gain too much energy. When it comes to practical affairs, the government will give everything convenience, and the government has the greatest power and influence in the local area; if this status is lost, Only by taking refuge in Jianwen's party members, what resources can be used and what can be done?

Suddenly Zhang Ning lost his "sense of belonging".Even if he has modern experience and thinking, he will feel apprehensive about this feeling.He didn't do well in his previous life, but he also had a regular job in a large state-owned enterprise that is not easy to collapse, so he has a sense of belonging. A small individual is relying on a large interest group, and has a recognized education and work. Relying on qualifications, I have a direction for my own positioning and development: I have more or less attached to my place, role and sense of existence in society.

And where does the current self belong?How did you participate in this social rule, and what role did you play?He has lost his sense of belonging.

When Lao Xu, Wen Jun, Zhao Erniang, Fang Ling and others saw that he held a certain amount of power, was respected, and seemed young and capable, who could understand his inner fear and anxiety?

Double-faced is totally playing with fire, not that fun.But how to choose between "taking" and "giving up"?If you give up your official position, the energy and resources you can obtain will drop significantly, which is even more detrimental to your hidden "ambition". With the power of Jianwen's remaining party, it will take years to make a splash; She can't feel at ease, even if she thinks about it, she can't face it, and she is more likely to be exposed by the people at Jianwen. At that time, no matter how much credit and seniority she has in the court officialdom, it will be in vain, and everything may be taken away overnight. The hidden danger is in her chest How to feel at ease?

Like countless evenings, Zhang Ning returned to his room to rest with anxiety and worry.As soon as I entered the door, I saw my little girl folding clothes by the bed. After washing and drying the clothes were brought in, she was carefully folding them and putting them away.Zhang Ning had to admit that the little girl was very meticulous in doing such small things, and the clothes were packed as if they were brand new. Perhaps only a simple state of mind could do such a job.

When the little girl heard the footsteps, she hurriedly turned her head, and the expression on her face was surprised in an instant: "Brother, I knew it was you who came back!"

Zhang Ning said: "Didn't Chayuanzi arrange for a few maids to come over, just let them do the housework, otherwise I seem to treat my sister like a maid."

The little girl shook her head: "I can take good care of my brother, do some work every day, and then wait for my brother to come back. It's pretty good."

Zhang Ning sat down on the chair a little tiredly. He didn't seem to do much every day, but he always felt tired. Maybe it was exhausting.He thought about what the younger sister said, nodded slightly, and thought it made sense. The younger sister used to help with the work of the brocade shop in her hometown, and she was with her close family members and relatives, living a simple and fulfilling life; now let her Doing nothing all day is really boring.

He suddenly found a piece of paper on the table with some small letters written on it. There was nothing to say, but the strokes were very serious. He recognized it immediately: "Written by my younger sister?" After finishing speaking, he picked it up and looked .

The little girl suddenly realized, and hurried over to snatch the paper from his hand, blushing and said: "I copied it as it was written, it was so ugly, I forgot to accept it just now."

"In the autumn of Renxu, at the end of the seventh month, Su Zi and his guests went boating under the Red Cliff. The breeze came slowly, but the water waves were calm... "Ode to the Former Red Cliff", written by Su Shi in the Northern Song Dynasty." Zhang Ning read a sentence and said.

The little girl was a little embarrassed and said: "I don't know what it means. My brother will tell me a story."

"How old are you, and you want to listen to stories again." Zhang Ning said casually, and after thinking for a while, he said, "If you really want to learn poetry, it will be a bit difficult to start with this kind of Fu. Learn simple Tang poetry first. There are few words and easy to memorize." .”

The little girl whispered: "I usually see my brother always write and do calculations, the handwriting is beautiful, I just copy it for fun... What's the use of me learning this, didn't my uncle say that a woman is virtuous without talent, I can't take the imperial examination."

Zhang Ning said with a smile: "Where is it useless? If my younger sister learns more poetry, she can be called a 'Xiangmendi, Zhidali' in the future. With a high social status, not only can she choose a better family, live a rich and happy life, You can also choose your husband-in-law's appearance, character and knowledge. What's not the case, how valuable you are, you can choose how high the conditions are, that's all."

The younger sister was silent after hearing this.

Zhang Ning talked to her for a while, and forgot his troubles for a while, and he said, "Recite a simple one first, and when I come back tomorrow night, my little sister will recite it to me. Let me think about it... um, Just this one: Spring sleep without awakening, mosquitoes bite everywhere..."

The little girl was wondering what was on her mind, so she burst out laughing when she heard "puchi" here, and said angrily, "Is there such a poem?"

"I recited it wrong..." Zhang Ning blushed, "I really didn't do it on purpose. Chunmian didn't wake up, and I heard birds singing everywhere. The sound of wind and rain at night, I don't know how many flowers fall."

"That's about the same." The little girl pondered for a while, her eyes curled up with a smile, and she said happily, "I understand what it means."

Zhang Ning said: "That's good, I'll write it down for you."

As the pen tip moved across the paper, Zhang Ning's mood suddenly improved.Isn't it the season of spring breeze and drizzle?The poems I recited when I was a child are simple and catchy, and I suddenly recall that the scene is full of emotion, and it turns out to be so beautiful.

The little girl softly whispered in her ear with understanding: "Brother didn't look good just now, did you encounter difficulties again?"

Zhang Ning showed a smile: "It's okay, little sister, don't worry about those mundane affairs. My brother is satisfied when he sees you living such a simple, happy and peaceful life. You will grow into a beautiful and temperamental girl."

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