life struggle

Bai Lingyan asked in astonishment, "What letter, where did you send it? Why haven't I seen any of it?"

Wu Xiaojun snorted coldly, "Really? Since you haven't seen it, I won't talk about it. Student Bai Lingyan, congratulations on getting into your ideal job and having a brand new life."

Seeing Wu Xiaojun's ugly face, Bai Lingyan asked anxiously, "Xiaojun, don't make sarcastic remarks and play charades for me. What's going on? Did you write to me?"

Wu Xiaojun looked at Bai Lingyan's desperate look, it didn't look like she was pretending, and suddenly realized that Bai Lingwan didn't give her his letter, which shows that she was coaxed by her family to come here.However, the fait accompli can no longer be changed, and it is meaningless to delve into it any further. She forced a wry smile, and said perfunctorily, "It completely broke my heart at your house that day, and I didn't write any letters to you at all."

Bai Lingyan said dubiously, "Is this really the case? At that time, my mind went blank and I passed out. How did you and uncle go? It wasn't until I woke up four days later that I found myself in the hospital. What happened during that period? I can’t remember. Later, my family said that you didn’t even have a letter, and I was very disappointed, so I came here with my dad.”

Wu Xiaojun said, "I know that you are not here with your true intention. Things have already happened, so I don't want to say anything more. Seeing that your life is on the right track, I am completely relieved. Now that the two have developed to this day, I I won’t blame anyone, I can only say that I have taken another path of love that I shouldn’t have taken. Thank you for being with you all these years and overcoming difficulties, so that I have gained immunity to the hardships of life and harvested An experience, and more importantly, I have gained love and care from you. Thank you for accompanying me through the familiar streets, the rivers that used to be, and the sweet corners of the port. I saw it again today You, made me see what we have had, what we have given up, what we have had, what we have been sad, everything we have had, and I am very pleased. I hope you will have a better life in the future."

Bai Lingyan said sadly, "Xiaojun, don't talk about whether these are good or not, I feel very sad."

Wu Xiaojun sighed and said, "During this period of time, I have thought a lot. Although I have put in a lot of effort on the road of slowly falling in love, it has always been very difficult. I feel the pain of hope being shattered and wanting to cry again and again. Already numb, doomed to be a failure in love. I no longer dare to have any extravagant hopes and fantasies about you, I hope you can get out of this unimaginable haze as soon as possible and build a happy family."

Bai Lingyan said resolutely, "Xiaojun, you are not allowed to say such things, unless you don't like me anymore and forget about me, I will always be waiting for you."

Wu Xiaojun said earnestly, "There is no possibility for the two of us anymore. If we continue to have fantasies, it will only be more painful. In order to relieve your troubles and restart a new life for myself, I have decided not to be troubled by love anymore. I found someone to marry years ago."

When Bai Lingyan heard Wu Xiaojun utter such dull and ruthless words, it was like five thunderbolts, she couldn't help trembling all over her body, and her whole body felt like being pricked by needles.Her eyes were wide open, she gritted her teeth, and said in surprise, "Xiaojun, please don't make things too complicated and too bad, please, and please don't stimulate my painful heart anymore." , if it is your original intention, I will never stop you, if you and Shao Yingying become husband and wife, I will not object, but if I say this to stimulate me, I will never agree."

Wu Xiaojun bowed his head in silence for a while, and said firmly, "From now on, we are just ordinary passers-by and have nothing to do with you. You are right. I am going to marry Shao Yingying, and she is my true life partner. Therefore, on behalf of her, I also wish you happiness and success in life."

Bai Lingyan said sadly, "Wu Xiaojun, I didn't expect you to be such a person. Did you come here specially to give me an ultimatum, or to send me an invitation. Don't worry, I will not miss the red envelopes from you and Shao Yingying." .”

Wu Xiaojun said with a cold face, "I'm meeting you for the last time today. I just want to express my heart and end our years of love. I don't want to make trouble with you like an enemy." After speaking, he turned his face away He walked away quickly without looking back.

Bai Lingyan followed closely for a few steps but couldn't catch up. She crouched on the ground looking at Wu Xiaojun's retreating back with a lonely expression, and murmured, "My relationship with Xiaojun will never go back to the past. It's over, it's over. It's over."

The [-]th day of the seventh month of the lunar calendar is the memorial day for the living to the deceased. Wu Xiaojun, who had been at home for many days without life, appeared in front of Luo Xiao's grave, and while burning paper money for her, he kept saying, "Xiao, ah! , do you know that I hate you very much? Do I miss you so much? Why did you let go of me so cruelly? Do you know how painful it was for me when you left? It was you who caused me to love each other but not to love, to hate but not to hate, yes There is no place to complain about suffering, no place to say anything, life is better than death. You are fine, lying here with nothing to do to enjoy the happiness. You are extremely unkind and unvirtuous. I curse you as an evil ghost. Can you hear that? Do you understand me? Let me tell you, Bai Lingyan has left, and I am alone again, so you are satisfied now. Are you reading my joke, or think I am too stupid? You are right , I'm really stupid. Do you know why? It's because you don't want me, Qin Meixiang doesn't want me, Feng Weiwei doesn't want me, Bai Lingyan doesn't want me. I'm a waste that no one sympathizes with. It's mine Indulgence has let you down, I owe you too much, and it is a well-deserved and unforgivable retribution to end up like this. If you want to write down this account, you can write it down. I don’t blame you, but I will feel relieved.”

Wu Xiaojun poured out his grievances to Luo Xiao tearfully, releasing the grief that had been suppressed for many days to his heart's content. At some point, he heard the accompanying crying sound beside him, so he hurriedly wiped away his tears, stood up and looked at the tears streaming down his face Chen Jie and Shao Yingying were too excited to say a word.

Chen Jie choked with distress and said, "My child, Auntie knows that you are very bitter and tired. If you want to cry, cry, and if you want to talk to Xiao Xiao for a while, just talk!"

Wu Xiaojun said sadly, "Auntie, I'm sorry for you and Uncle Luo. I failed to protect Xiao and visit you often for Xiao. I made you both sad and disappointed. I'm sorry, please forgive me!"

Chen Jie said distressedly, "Auntie knows you are a good boy, no matter what you do, Auntie will not blame you, don't blame yourself, don't be sad. Let's go home!"

Wu Xiaojun and Chen Jie returned home and Shao Yingying sat on the chair in Shao Yingying's room, staring blankly at the photo of Luo Xiao hanging on the wall. She was so youthful and beautiful, her smile was so familiar and sweet. The good times when people are together, there are bursts of sadness in my heart.

Shaoying asked quietly, "Has Lingyan left? Why do you suddenly think of visiting my sister's grave?"

"Let's go. I've been on duty for ten days. I'm bored at home and feel very bored, so I thought of visiting Luo Xiao. How are you doing now?"

"The unified distribution procedures in the county will wait until after the Spring Festival. It's okay to be idle here. Uncle Luo talked to the dean, and then he went to work early to familiarize himself with the environment. The salary of 300 yuan a month, after the official procedures are completed, then according to The normal salary package is okay, it’s better than being idle.”

"Which department are you in, are you busy?"

"The obstetrics and gynecology department has a lot of patients. The four senior doctors are all very good, and they didn't treat me as an outsider. There are more opportunities to do it. They have been working for 20 days and have been the first assistant for seven operations."

"Well, that's great, I'm relieved and happy for you."

"What are you and Lingyan going to do? Don't you just give up without a trace of concern?"

"One is in the east and the other is in the west. They are thousands of miles apart. If you can't hit eight strokes, what can you do if you don't give up."

"Did you contact me again later?"

"She sent me three letters. I was not in the mood at all. I just wanted to forget the past as soon as possible. I broke her mind and died. I didn't reply to any of them. Let us slowly accept this wordless ending."

"It's time for the tea to cool down, not to mention the relationship that has been accumulated for several years. I don't think you can do this. What are your plans next? Has the work unit implemented it?"

"Not yet, and I don't want someone to contact me. I just want to calm down, settle my mood, and sort out some clues. When the harvest is finished and the autumn wheat is planted, go outside and have a look. It will open your eyes."

"It's not so easy to find a job outside, is there any direction?"

"Yes, I initially plan to go to the deep sea."

"Are there any acquaintances there?"

"I heard that a friend works as a manager in a company. Give it a try, maybe you can find it."

"It's okay to go for a while to relax, but not too long. Yuanzhen is your home and your final destination. Your family is looking forward to your early return."

Although it's Ghost Festival, a day when everyone can't enjoy it, Wu Xiaojun suddenly came to pay respects to Luo Xiao at the grave, which surprised Chen Jie.The hope that had been lost was rekindled, the excitement hidden in my heart was hard to express, like entertaining a distinguished guest, I was busy cooking a table full of dishes, "Xiaojun, since we met during the Spring Festival, half a year has passed Too much. You and Yingzi have changed a lot. At that time, you were still a college student who hadn’t left the school. In a blink of an eye, you became an official employee of the country. Auntie is happy for you and blesses you from the bottom of my heart. Yingzi joined the work, and I can count on it. In the end, I have a heart disease, and I have to wait for a year or so before Yingzi brings me back a good son-in-law, who will be happy with my grandson."

Shao Yingying blushed and said shyly, "Mom, what are you talking about, how embarrassing you are!"

Chen Jie giggled and said, "You are a big girl now, you should marry and you must marry, what can't you say!"

Wu Xiaojun said with a smile, "Auntie, don't worry, according to Yingzi's conditions, we have to pick and choose. We don't like ordinary people. You say so, Yingzi!"

Shao Yingying whispered embarrassingly, "Xiaojun, why are you talking nonsense with my mother, besides, I'm going to fuck you and leave!"

Wu Xiaojun hurriedly begged for mercy and said, "Okay, okay, can't I shut up?"

Chen Jie watched the two joking happily, and said to Luo Wen appreciatively, "Old Luo, our good days are coming soon."