Learn some wonderful questioning techniques, mind reading techniques, and psychological control tech

Chapter 19 Part [-]
Previous: Questioning skills: how to speak so that others will listen, how to listen so that others will speak
Chapter 4 Interrogation Scene 4: The distance between people's hearts, the measurement of interrogation
The second section perseveres, from the superficial to the deep to the end

Mini scene house: In a relatively closed environment, how to arouse the interest of the other party through appropriate questioning.

Question story session:
On a train, Li Ming sat next to a man.Li Ming wanted to know his details, so he accosted him and said, "I'm sorry, do you have any matches?"

The man nodded, took out a box of matches from his pocket and handed it to Li Ming.

Li Ming: "Thank you, it's been a long and annoying journey, do you feel the same way?"

"Hmm." There was some impatience in his tone.

"It would be nice to see the rice fields along the way. It must be more interesting a month or two before the rice is harvested?"

"Well, well!" he agreed vaguely.

"The weather is really nice today. It's a good time to play football. There are several college teams that are very good this fall. Have you paid attention to this matter?"

The man straightened up.

"What do you think of the Polytechnic team?" he asked.

"The University of Science and Technology team is very good. Although several veterans have left the team, the newcomers are very good. Do you also pay attention to this team?"

"Well, yes, have you ever heard of a team member named Li Xiaoning?" He asked anxiously.

Li Ming followed his words: "He is a strong, powerful, skilled young man with good character. If the University of Science and Technology team loses this player, its strength will be greatly reduced. But after Li Xiaoning graduated, how will the team survive?" It's hard to say. What, you know him?"

The man began to talk happily after hearing this.

Wonderful question:

The hardest thing about being with strangers is when neither of them speaks to each other, or when one speaks and the other has no interest in speaking.How to break the silence is what the active speaker wants to know most.

If you meet a taciturn person, he has the desire to talk to the other person, but at first, that person didn't pay attention to him.At this time, make a tentative inquiry and ask the other party if they have matches.This is a very common way to strike up a conversation, and there is a similar one: "I'm sorry, can I borrow some fire?" The purpose is to see if you can have a few words with the other party and arouse the other party's desire to talk.But the person in the text is very silent, just simply perfunctory.Ordinary people probably lose the courage to continue speaking after several attempts to no avail.But go one step further, keep asking, and ask deeper, and get closer to that person.As described in the story, first it is the situation of the college team in the fall football game, and then it is specific to the polytechnic university.After asking a few questions like this, the other party's interest in talking is stimulated.

Why is the other party's interest in the conversation stimulated?Is it because he can't stand the other party's soft and hard foam?of course not.He found a topic to talk about together.

The process from having nothing to say to having something to talk about is actually the process in which the silent person and the active questioner in the story change from alienation to intimacy.Ever since he was asked about the college football team, his heart has been changing, and this change is first reflected in his external movements: his body slowly straightens up, which is an expression of concern.Then the conversation changed from passive answering to active questioning, thus completely breaking the deadlock in the conversation.

It can be seen that when people meet each other, it is not that they have nothing to talk about, but that they have not found a suitable topic for both parties.Such topics often require a process of probing and deepening, and if you want to go through this process, you must have the spirit of perseverance, and you cannot stop asking just because you are blocked once or twice.The deeper and wider you ask, the more topics you will find.By digging out the topics that the other party is most interested in, the two strangers gradually become familiar with each other, and the atmosphere of the conversation becomes harmonious.

In the face of strangers, in order to quickly open the chat box, you can use the following methods:
1. Find topics from the other party's accent

The accent of the other party can explain his approximate place of birth or place of residence. Starting from here, you can ask questions about local customs, famous people, etc., to stimulate the other party's desire to talk.

2. Find topics from items related to the other party
The things carried by the other party are usually related to his interests and hobbies. Starting from here, it is easier to open the other party's chatterbox.If the other party is reading a sports magazine, saying "Do you like sports?" will shorten the distance between the two parties a lot in an instant.

3. Find topics from the other party's clothing

A person's clothes often reflect his taste. If you talk about the brand of his clothes, the communication may be more harmonious.

(End of this chapter)