Learn some wonderful questioning techniques, mind reading techniques, and psychological control tech

Chapter 5 Part [-]
Previous: Questioning skills: how to speak so that others will listen, how to listen so that others will speak
Chapter 1 Questioning Scenario 1: Questioning is everywhere

Section [-] Warm up with questions and eliminate the cold state

Mini scene house:
When meeting for the first time, how to ask questions to avoid taboo topics and find out the other party's sincerity.

Question story session:
Xiaochao is an animation lover, and recently he became obsessed with making airplane models. He was introduced to a model expert named Zhao Yan, and the two started talking as soon as they met.

Xiao Chao: "I heard that you are an expert in this field?"

Zhao Yan: "It doesn't count, I just like to play."

Xiaochao: "How long have you been doing this? I heard that some people in this industry are very mysterious. They used to specialize in making airplanes? Is the principle of airplanes very complicated? Is there anything interesting to reveal?"

After hearing Xiaochao's words, Zhao Yan's expression suddenly became serious.

"Why are you asking this? I don't know."

Feeling the other party's obvious resistance, Xiaochao quickly said: "Sorry, let me explain. The reason why I asked you about the principle of airplanes is because I am learning to make airplane models recently. Didn't my friend tell you?"

Zhao Yan shook his head: "He only said that you wanted to get to know me, but he didn't say the specific reason."

"Oh, that's my mistake. I should have told you why I asked in advance. Apart from the principles of airplanes, I also want to know the cost and materials for making airplane models. After all, I'm new to this, and I'm still very knowledgeable about it. Lack, okay?"

"Of course. I'll understand as soon as you explain it. Otherwise, you'll ask me about the principle of the plane when we meet. I'll think you're a spy."

"Haha, my fault, my fault."

Wonderful question:

When meeting for the first time, no matter what the purpose is, I always hope to understand each other as much as possible, and one question after another is asked in this way.As everyone knows, this way of questioning will cause discomfort to the other party, and the guard will be even heavier.The first party who asks the question is often not aware of this sign, until the other party shows obvious avoidance and guarding, and the questioner has to explain his question.So the doubts dissipated, and the conversation between the two sides gradually became harmonious.Wouldn't the communication be more effective if you explained why you asked something at the very beginning of the conversation?

Xiaochao made the mistake of only consulting but not explaining.His question made the other party full of doubts, and even suspected that he was a spy because of the sensitivity of the question.Because of such thoughts, the heart of the other party will be more tightly closed, and naturally the communication will not be smooth.During this process, the other party was still wary and didn't regard Xiao Chao as a real friend, and Xiao Chao asked like that because he didn't pay attention to the other party's performance.

Meeting unfamiliar people requires a cognitive process, and we must not ignore the process of communicating with each other just because we are eager to understand something.Let the other party have a general understanding of the purpose of your dialogue with him, and let him know what to do, so that he will answer your questions.

Xiaochao asked for an explanation from the beginning, because he felt the change in the other party's heart: from strangeness to resistance, he might be more defensive if he didn't explain. It's always been cold.

Therefore, in life, when we meet someone for the first time, no matter how much we want to know about the other person, we must not ignore the question of forbidden words, and we must be patient and speak slowly.In particular, you should first explain to the other person your intention of asking this way, so that he can open up to express his thoughts to the greatest extent, and you will understand this person better.

(End of this chapter)