There are too many routines for paranoid male gods

Chapter 458 Everything she doesn't know.

——I received the first birthday gift you gave me in my life. It was a box of handcuff-shaped cookies. I never felt so happy.Just handcuff me like this for the rest of my life, okay?Thank you for your gift, the best gift of my life.

——I have a tumor in my brainstem, and the probability of a successful operation is less than [-]%. The cruelest thing is that even if the operation is successful, I may die.Even if I don't have the operation, my life may be in danger at any time... I just fell in love with you, why should I be disqualified from loving you?

——When meeting with Ouyang and the others, a woman named Tong Lin made up a story with an earring.I suddenly made such a decision.I decided to give up on you.Although my heart hurts to death, I can't let you watch me die and suffer for the rest of my life.Hate is easier to let go than love. You hate me better than you love me.In this way, even if I die one day, you will be healed one day.

——Xia Xia, I am writing this message now, how I hope you can open it now, so that I can tell you, I’m sorry, Xia Xia, I didn’t mean to hurt you, I don’t like Tong Lin, she Nor is it my dream lover/person.You were the one who saved my life when I was young, even if you forget me, I will never forget you.But, I know, you won't see it.Because I know you can't see it, I send you messages every day.

—— Xia Xia who promised not to hurt you, I hurt you again, why don't you leave me quickly, so that I can die in peace.Why do you let me hurt you over and over again, when will such days end.I really think that all this is a dream. When we wake up from the dream, we are still happy.I won't die and don't have to play the role of hurting you and making you leave me...I can hug you and say sorry and I love you.

——Xia Xia, why are you doing this to me?I just... I just want you to leave me, why did you jump into the sea!How can you die!
——I found your body today, and there is a crystal bottle I gave you next to it. There is still a drop of seawater in the crystal bottle. That is our unfinished agreement. I promised you that I will show you all over the world. All the seas, let the sea water from all over the world fill this crystal bottle of happiness, I haven't done it yet, why do you leave me...

—— Xia Xia, don't let me not find you, okay?please.Losing you is something that scares and despairs me more than death, you know?

——Grandpa asked me to have an operation, and he hired the best oncologist in the world for me. If I die on the operating table, it will be treated as if we are destined to never be together. I have a strong intuition, I think, you must still Alive, you must be alive, I must not die, otherwise, who else can find you instead of me.

——The operation was successful, Xia Xia, if I knew that the operation could be successful, I would never do such a stupid thing and let you leave me.where are you now?You couldn't get through the previous phone calls, you seemed to have evaporated from the world, the sea is so big, it is as difficult to find you as a needle in a haystack, but I will not give up looking for you.

—— Xia Xia, where are you now?How are you doing?Will not worry about life?I put some money in your card, if you have any difficulties, you will definitely need it.

——Xia Xia, why, you never use a bank card.I've searched all over the world, I've searched for all the Li Shengxias, but none of them are you.

—They all think I'm crazy, they all tell me you're dead.They all made me give up looking for you and throw myself into a new life.But only I know that you must be alive.If you are dead, then what is the meaning of my life going on?Xia Xia, can you come out and let everyone know that I am not crazy, you are not dead, and we will have a future...

——Ouyang introduced many girls to me, but I don't like any of them. I only like one person. I only like one person in this life, and that person is you.Apart from you, no one can walk into my heart.How about you, when will you be back?

——Xia Xia, today I went back to the place where we lived a long time ago, and you lived next door to me at that time.I found a music box and a letter in your room.I saw the complete content of the letter back then. It turned out that it was not a letter of severance. It turned out that you also liked me five years ago.I am stupid, how stupid I am, how self-righteous I am, do I still have a chance to apologize to you?I'm sorry, Xia Xia, I'm sorry, I didn't know until it was too late. It turned out that you also liked me for so many years.But I stubbornly hurt you for so long...

——Xia Xia, the cafe we ​​used to go to is also closed today.And your old favorite CD store.When will you come back?When you come back, are those memories that belong to us gone?
——Xia Xia, several months have passed, and there is still no news from you.But I know that you must still be alive.Do you still remember 'Ten Miles of Red Makeup', the street I sent you off.I'm starting to renovate this place, rebuild this place, and I'm going to lock up all our memories here.In this way, I no longer have to worry about which store will close down, and I don't have to worry about it anymore. Our common memories have been reduced a little bit.

——It’s my birthday again, and I still haven’t received the birthday present you gave me this year.Can I get it next year?

— Another year has passed, and I'm in the CD store, listening to your favorite songs from the past.I think of you again.

——It's my birthday again, I'm starting to hate birthdays, because I still can't receive your gift, have you forgotten me?Xia Xia, don't forget me, don't forget that in this world, there is a person waiting for you, waiting for you to say happy birthday to him, okay?
——Half a year has passed, Xia Xia, today is your birthday, "Ten Miles of Red Makeup" has finally been renovated, I walked over and over again, passing through the good memories we had, everything is so beautiful, only you are here next to me.Happy birthday, Xia Xia...

——Five years, Xia Xia, you have been missing for five years, do you know that?If you still remember me, please, come back and see me, okay?

——I saw you in MARY Magazine!Li Shengxia, you are very good, you actually changed your name to Xia Shengli!I found you!I finally found you, I knew, you are not dead, how could you die!

——The plane finally arrived in L City, on the other side of the world, I came to Xia Xia.

——Why pretend you don't know me! ?You clearly remember me, right? ?I know that I have done many wrong things before, and I know that you will not forgive me so easily, but I believe that one day I will get your forgiveness.

(End of this chapter)