Secret Love · Orange Raw Huainan

Chapter 103 Part Two: The Moon at that Time (1)
There are many trees in the new campus.It has been preserved since the establishment of the school and the land was planned. The branches and leaves are disorderly, and they complement the large number of new sculptures in the campus.

The trees are naturally vigorous and unrestrained, and the sculptures are man-made as they please, facing each other coldly and standing in their respective places.If nothing else, we will look at each other like this for decades in the future.

Ding Shuijing avoids the scorching sun at noon, jumps up and down under the shade of trees, and walks on the shadows.It's already mid-September, and the weather is still not getting cooler.The hair swept across her neck as she jumped, itching and a little stuffy.

She hadn't been able to grow her hair long after all.Whenever it reaches this length, the ends of the hair will be turned upside down around the neck, and the whole head looks like an upside-down pineapple. She will go to the barber shop to cut a little bit off when she is bored.This cycle goes on and on, and the hair is still half-length and not short, hanging on the shoulders in a hurry.

Ding Shuijing casually put the broken hair behind her head as she walked, feeling much refreshed.The cicadas kept chirping, making her upset. She didn't know if it was because of the hangover. Her chest felt anxious, her palms were slippery, and she was sweating cold.

The phone vibrated, it was a text message.She didn't dare to open it immediately.

It may be that the familiar black car driver told her that the car will be here soon.

Or maybe Luoyang told her that you don't have to come.

Ding Shuijing unlocked it awkwardly, and when she saw the words "Master Li", her chest felt relaxed, and her heart fell from a high position to mid-air, but she was not at ease to the end.

Luoyang did not say "you don't have to come".

But he never said "come on".

Ding Shuijing sat on the big rock at the school gate, quietly waiting for the car.In midsummer, the stones under the shade of trees are warm, even a little hot.

She remembered Shen Congwen's "Border Town" which she studied in Chinese class in high school.

In the evening, my grandfather refused to let Cui Cui sit on the big rock that had been exposed to strong sunlight for a day, fearing that the residual heat would cause acne, but he touched it with his hands and sat down on the rock together.The grandparents and grandchildren looked at Qingxi under the moonlight together, it was so beautiful.

Ding Shuijing has no interest in literature, and once joined Ye Zhanyan and the others in complaining about these Chinese texts, "What kind of nonsense are they talking about?" But she always remembers the article "Border Town".

There are pictures hidden in the text: the misty morning, the clear stream in the mountains, the love thoughts flowing between the melodious songs on both sides of the bank; the slow life, the unhurried era, the waiting without results... Everyone's love Life is a simple line, maybe winding, but coherent and clear.

She will never be like herself: duplicity, self-righteousness, tangled into a mess.

She didn't like this article when she was in high school, but she got to know Luoyang later, walking by the West Lake, the moon was shining on the lake, and he suddenly told a joke.

"A asked: 'Have you ever studied Shen Congwen's Border Town?' B replied: 'No, we learned C++.'"

Ding Shuijing didn't laugh because this joke was really difficult to make people laugh.

Instead, after the joke was told, the awkward silence between the two made them laugh out loud together.He rolled his eyes with a smile, and she raised the corners of her lips. She couldn't stop laughing for a long time, and she really didn't understand why.

Being stupid for him, doing bad things for her, or just being silent for five seconds under the moonlight by the lake.

"Border Town", Ding Shuijing searched her stomach, but could only remember the fragment about the stone with residual heat and couldn't sit on it, so she asked Luoyang if she knew what a sore was.

"Fire boils on your butt?" Luo Yang scratched his head, "I don't know where to go. That article was so long, I just remember that their folk customs are very interesting, and they like to sing folk songs across the river."

"You remember it as Miss Liu," Ding Shuijing said with a smile, "In the border town, boys sing folk songs to girls at night, which can be heard from far away."

He pulled her towards the bench by the lake, and the two sat down side by side.The night breeze is slightly cool, Hangzhou in October is the best time, gold is not exchanged.

"And what happened next?" he asked. "Looks like a tragedy?"

Looking at Luoyang's expectant face, Ding Shuijing secretly complained.If she had known about the current situation, she would have read that text carefully.

"Cui Cui's mother had a private life-long contract with a soldier. After giving birth to her in secret, the two died together. She was raised by her grandfather, and a pair of boatman brothers fell in love with her at the same time. She herself liked her younger brother."

Luo Yang raised his eyebrows and smiled: "As expected, I knew."

"You've already learned this lesson, why are you pretending to be Sherlock Holmes?" She interrupted him mercilessly.

Luo Yang once said that he likes to see Ding Shuijing's sharp teeth piercing through others the most.

He said a lot of things related to "like", but they were always followed by a long object, never once, just a simple "you".

Ding Shuijing continued: "However, Cui Cui's grandfather mistakenly thought that the one who had feelings for her was her elder brother, so he encouraged her to confess. After the elder brother was rejected, he had a sad accident and died. The younger brother complained about Cui Cui's grandfather, so A person left his hometown and left. The old man regretted and passed away. In the end, only Cuicui was left, waiting for his sweetheart to come back every day."

She picked up the part that was still solid in her memory, and told him stumbledly, but she didn't expect him to listen so engrossed.

"Terrible," he concluded.

Ding Shuijing just raised her head and poured the last sip of lemon tea, almost spit it out.

Speech-impaired dork.She looked at him, her heart softened.

He always gave her a feeling of helplessness and soft-heartedness, and he was so funny that she couldn't help but want to tease him; the silence was gentle and careless, and at a certain moment he revealed the coldness of her heart, which shocked her and broke her heart .

It made her want to conquer so much.

All the evaluations related to Luoyang appeared in Ding Shuijing's mind. For the first time in her life, she couldn't piece together a picture for this man—because the most suitable picture was right in front of her eyes.

"Yeah, it's miserable." She looked at him, looking deeply into her eyes. "Love is hard to be happy, and it's boring when it's good."

Ding Shuijing still doesn't know if she said that on purpose - who made the love between him and that girlfriend be perfect?

She insisted on saying, "This is boring."

I don't know if it's just pretending, Luo Yang just smiled, nodded and said, "Yes, tragedies are easier to remember." But he quickly looked at her with a smile and said, "Girl, don't be emotional. "

He saw that her lemon tea was finished, and ran to buy her a new one.Ding Shuijing sat alone on the bench, looking at the lake bay in the distance, the continuous street lamps are connected into a winding bead chain, and the end stretches into the dark night sky, making the full moon rising on the lake seem to be broken in the night sky pendant in.

The moonlight is very good, and the lake light is very good.She is fine and so is he.

Everything has just begun, but I don't know if it will end.All the ambiguous wanderings should have been sweet temptations, but there was an impenetrable wall between them.

But Ding Shuijing couldn't tell whether the wall was his girlfriend or himself.

She turned her head and saw him holding two drinks across the narrow road and running towards this side.

For the first time, Ding Shuijing's heart was filled with real sorrow.

She looked at him like a thief, staring greedily and sadly at a treasure firmly embedded in the iron wall.

The black car master went across the road, honked his horn, then turned around and stopped at the school gate.Ding Shuijing sat on it, wrinkling her nose from the sweltering heat in the car.

"Is it hot? I'll turn on the air conditioner." The driver, Master Wang, quickly closed the four windows and turned on the air conditioner to the maximum.A smell of earth rushed into his nostrils, he turned his head and smiled at Ding Shuijing shyly, "I haven't used it for a long time, the air conditioner smells a bit, don't worry, it will be fine soon."

Ding Shuijing smiled, expressing that she didn't mind, her eyes were already so distracted that she didn't know where she had gone.

Master Wang also came here to work from other places. He drove his family in a black car in Zhuantang for several years, and shifted shifts with his wife day and night. The purchase of art supplies has been mixed to some extent, large and small, and any opportunity to make money has not been missed.

"Are you going downtown today?" Master Wang asked.

"what?"

"It's nothing, I just saw that you were quite nervous, and thought you had something important to do in the city."

Spotted?Ding Shuijing nodded and shook her head, her chaotic thoughts made her perception a little dull, and she was isolated from the real world.

"Is it a senior year at the beginning of school? Doing graduation project?"

"It hasn't started yet."

"Would you like to continue reading later?"

"In the future..." Ding Shuijing was in a daze, "I didn't think about it. Maybe, go abroad."

Master Wang nodded plainly and commented: "It's good to go abroad. You can learn good things when you go abroad, but you have to go to a good school. Do you still study sculpture?"

"...Don't read it. Maybe change it to something else."

It's always difficult to get ahead in the art class. Master Wang showed an expression of understanding as expected, but Ding Shuijing was stung instead.What would he think if he knew that she dropped out of school for two years to take the art test?

Ding Shuijing has always admired those who work hard, but she admires those who are so full of talent or wealth that they don't feel bad even if they squander.Grape wine luminous glass, you can throw it straight at the wall as you like.

She used to think that she was more or less the latter.

It takes a long time to drive from the new campus to the old campus by the lake in the city center, passing through the desolate suburbs, passing the uneven tall and short houses, and the ugly plaques flashed quickly, connecting them into a blur.On the right is the Qiantang River, and Ding Shuijing saw a terrifying ancient city standing abruptly by the river from a distance—in the man-made rockery boulders, a shoddy "large-scale folk landscape epic song and dance drama" was staged, deceiving a large number of tourist groups to come here tour. The "ancient city" looks pitifully ugly during the day, but at night, illuminated by the hideous green spotlights, it actually shows a bit of structural beauty.

She remembered this miserable green.

At midnight last night, they also drove back to school from this road.The four of them squeezed into a taxi, drunk enough to ignore the driver's displeasure—city drivers didn't like to drive to Zhuantang's new campus, because they would inevitably have to drive empty on the way back.But they still squeezed into the car, talking to themselves noisily, and no one paid attention to the muttering driver.

In the eyes of a drunken person, a journey can be stretched to infinity, or it can be as short as the blink of an eye.Ding Shuijing is sitting in the back row, her forehead resting on the glass on the left; her roommate who just broke up with her boyfriend who lives with her is crying silently beside her, the two tear stains on her face are covered with mascara, like a sad clown; Leaning on the co-pilot seat, weeping like he was possessed by something, showing the cracks in his years of kindness, reserve and caution.

But all the memories are like a lens covered with lard, which can't be seen clearly. Only the miserable green monster stands tall and walks slowly through Ding Shuijing's mind with a pitiful expression.

Just as he was thinking, a new text message entered into his phone.As usual, she panicked again. Fortunately, it was the news from the elder brother, which was very appropriate.

"I lost my composure yesterday, I'm sorry." He said.

A sneer appeared on Ding Shuijing's face, and she gently closed the phone without replying.

In the KTV last night, the students sang and played, fought dice and drank alcohol, and went to the bathroom together to vomit.And she sat quietly in the corner of the sofa, pinching her mobile phone, and browsed the news from Renren that she had just scrolled over and over again.

The company in Luoyang is coming to the art gallery by the West Lake for an event.

Feeling tossed and tossed like a lone boat on a stormy sea, the senior brother suddenly sat over, approached her, and said, "Little junior sister, come and have a drink."

"I know what you want to tell me," Ding Shuijing turned to look at him, interrupting him impatiently, "I won't tell anyone, to anyone."

After the car entered the urban area, it went slower and slower. They were unlucky and caught up with almost every red light. Master Wang sighed and scolded something Ding Shuijing couldn't understand in Hokkien.

"Master, can we go faster?" She couldn't help leaning forward and urged, "I have to arrive at 02:30."

"I'll try my best, who knows that it's so blocked, I can't fly over!"

Ding Shuijing fell back to her seat helplessly, and nervously read the event notifications saved in her phone over and over again.

At midnight yesterday, the Luoyang company's official account posted a preview of the roadshow on the Internet.He also interacted with his colleagues on the event page, cheered each other up, and said, "See you in Hangzhou tomorrow."

Ding Shuijing's hands trembled slightly.

There have been many opportunities before.There are always inextricable connections between classmates, which can always be heard and seen.Everyone knows her and likes her. Hearing that she suddenly dropped out of school and retakes the exam to pursue her dream adds to the legend.Every time she goes to Beijing, she will be invited to various gatherings by senior brothers and sisters, and Luoyang is often included in these gatherings.

But she didn't.She was absent from the occasions in Luoyang, not even once indulging herself, pretending to appear in a KTV casually, and not once harboring evil intentions.

To confront Chen Jing aggressively with a forged signature is something that 19-year-old Ding Shuijing would do.There is a container in everyone's heart, which is full of selfishness and loneliness. The part that belongs to her has long been evaporated by the sunshine of the fast food restaurant on their wedding day.

She would never do that again.

Chen Jing's composure and patience are all skills, but they are not the reason for Ding Shuijing's failure.

She lost because she didn't qualify.Luoyang did not give her any qualifications to fight for.

She knew that Luoyang would go to those parties that she was supposed to attend, and Luoyang also knew that she would go.But she was the one who was absent in the end, and Luoyang never broke the appointment.

But what does this prove? The 19-year-old Ding Shuijing will be sure that he wants to see her. Even if he is still talking and laughing, he will definitely be disappointed and sad when he looks at the seat vacated by her.

However, 24-year-old Ding Shuijing couldn't judge anything.She has the ability to make everyone like her, become friends with her, never make a mistake in judging anyone, even enemies and opponents can see clearly, only Luoyang blinds her repeatedly.

He would show up all the time, maybe not because he wanted to see her, but because he was upright in his heart and didn't need to avoid her.

Night after night, Ding Shuijing stared at the ceiling and guessed over and over again, guessing that tears were pouring down her eyes, and then used her cherished memories to warm her cold heart.

He climbed up to the roof of the library with her at midnight, wrapped in a windshield, and waited for the Leonid meteor shower.

Encouraged by her, he bought cigarettes to try with her.Both of them choked out snot and tears, and later learned separately, no one knew except each other.

When a group of people in the club took a group photo, they never deliberately stood together, but they always greeted each other with their eyes, and their eyes circled countless people's shoulders, entwined.

Ding Shuijing remembers a song, singing "Love is a look".She obviously read it right, obviously not.

All the ambiguous warmth in the memory, like the warm water bag in the bed in winter night, if you don't pay attention, it will eventually become a chronic scalding heart.

The car finally stopped across the road from the art museum. She threw 60 yuan to Master Wang, and quickly got out of the car with her bag, running across the road like a rabbit.

She has been here many times.The roommate often takes private jobs arranged by the big brother to earn extra money, and she is always invited to accompany him during several exhibitions.Ding Shuijing took out 20 yuan from her bag to buy tickets, and went straight to the staff lounge on the third floor with ease.

Halfway up the stairs, she saw herself in the mirror in the stairwell.

His hair was not tied tightly, and half of it fell down because of the bumps of running, like a madman; his palm-sized face was hidden behind the broken hair, and because of excitement and tension, it was red like a high fever, only a pair of eyes were frighteningly bright, piercing through the eyes. Through the broken hair covering his face, he stared straight at himself.

Ding Shuijing stopped slowly, threw the backpack at her feet, and began to tie up her hair seriously in front of the mirror.His face gradually faded, and his eyes gradually darkened.

What would happen if you really broke in?Yesterday she mustered up the courage to send a text message, asking him if he was holding an event at the art gallery, but he ignored it.Should she go up to him now and say, "Let's have a cup of coffee together, I heard you're getting a divorce?"

Ding Shuijing stared blankly at herself in the mirror.

After the wedding ended that year, Luo Zhi went back to McDonald's to find her and showed her the photos of the scene taken with her mobile phone.

She begged Luo Zhi to take the film, and after watching it, she asked Luo Zhi why she was so cruel.

Luo Zhi didn't blame her for being unreasonable, but just looked down at her with a complicated expression, the only thing that could be distinguished was pity.

"After all, you're married, so you don't want to look for them anymore," Luo Zhi said, "Don't get me wrong, I know you haven't contacted them since you dropped out of school. I'm not reminding or warning, don't get me wrong."

"Don't explain it so carefully, as if I'm a ticking time bomb." The floor-to-ceiling glass beside him slightly reflected the sneer on his face, "Your brother is not that worthy of my persistence."

After saying this, she herself felt so fake.Luo Zhi sat opposite, lowered her head and smiled kindly, without revealing anything.

Ding Shuijing also found it boring, tossing her hair, rubbed all the fried chicken packaging bags that had been torn up during the waiting process into a small pile, and said solemnly after a long while: "I won't go to him anymore. The same. You don't have to worry, if it's useful for me to find him, they won't get married, you have to have confidence in your brother, don't you? He doesn't like me, it's just me being sentimental and shameless. Really ,don’t worry."

When she said this, it was rare that she didn't have the slightest urge to shed tears, her eye circles were dry, and her harsh comments seemed to be talking about others.

Luo Zhi raised her head, and said slowly: "I don't let you find him because I don't have confidence in him. I don't think you're just pretending to be sentimental."

It was these words that made Ding Shuijing burst into tears.

So in his three years of marriage, she did nothing, maintained moral justice, but never stopped cursing his marriage for being unhappy in her heart even for a moment.

Is it another kind of shamelessness to wait for an opportunity?Waiting made her feel mean and humble.

Downstairs is the audience who came to see the exhibition, and the door upstairs may be Luoyang.She stood in mid-air, unable to find her place.

(End of this chapter)