If you can love like this

Chapter 70

"Anyway, if you don't come, I will become the first local Chinese to starve to death on the street."

"What's the matter? Your uncle kicked you out?"

"No, I kicked myself out."

"I'm so ignorant!..."

At this time, I had just finished eating a large piece of salmon, wiped my mouth full of oil, and stretched out my hand and yelled at him: "Bring me the money!"

"What money?" Geng Mochi was stunned.

"Didn't you just give me money at the entrance of the underground mall?"

"Then why didn't you just want to?"

As soon as I heard this, I became angry, "Give me money in that kind of place, what do others think of me?"

"What are you?" He asked knowingly.

"Stop talking nonsense, bring the money!" I stretched out my hand again, so I didn't bother to talk to him, and helped him pay for the charter and utility bills, causing me to eat bread every day, and I haven't asked him to settle the bill.

Geng Mochi didn't say anything else, he took out his wallet and took out a stack of brand new dollars.I took it, dear, I think I am either running back and forth in the coffee shop these days, or playing the piano numbly in the restaurant, for what, isn't it just for these lovely dollars.I grinned, and kissed the banknote hard, the kiss made a loud noise.

Geng Mochi looked at my appearance of worshiping money, and said thoughtfully: "Actually, I hope you are more worldly, but your life is too unrealistic. Be more worldly, maybe you won't suffer so much."

It turns out that he also knows that I have suffered!

But when he got back to the houseboat, he was furious, because the house was a mess, clothes and socks were thrown everywhere, the white carpet was full of stains, the leftover instant noodles, and the cups of cereal were either placed on the coffee table or placed on the table. On the windowsill, the most outrageous thing is that I threw an uneaten piece of bread on the noble piano.I can't blame me for this. I work outside every day and fall asleep as soon as I come back. I don't have time for cleaning.But I know that this time Geng Mochi won't let me off lightly, because he has always been obsessed with cleanliness, and he doesn't like the mess in the house the most, and it can't be messy at all. The houseboat turned into a refugee shelter?

Sure enough, Geng Mochi was furious, he pulled me to the middle of the room, pointed at the garbage in the room and shouted: "Look, show me, what have you done to my house? Is this still a house for people to live in?" ?! Are you still a human being? Even a cat or dog wouldn’t make their nest look like this?! Clean it up for me! Go get it right away! You’ll have to clean it up for me if you don’t sleep tonight!” said Then he pinched me again, "Hurry up, clean up! Let me find a hair and I'll kill you!"

There is no way, in order to save my life, I had to go downstairs to clean up.When I was cleaning, he went out, and before leaving, he said viciously: "If I come back and you haven't cleaned the house, you will sleep on the street for me tonight!"

Two hours later, the crab came back, there was only one bed, where would he let me sleep?
I've been sleeping on the carpet in my bedroom since he came back.

Not only did this bastard not let me sleep on the bed, he even refused to sleep on the sofa downstairs. The reason was: "Do you know that the sofa is very expensive, 20 US dollars? What if I sleep badly?!"

I think I'm really crazy, instead of sleeping on the big bed in Qi Shuli's mansion, I came here to sleep on the floor.On the first night, we had a big quarrel over this matter. The cause was that he went to the bathroom in the middle of the night, but he didn't see someone sleeping on the floor, so he didn't step over and tripped.He picked me up from my sleep, and I thought I was dreaming at first, but when I figured out it wasn't a dream, I was almost smothered to death by him with the quilt.

On the second night, there was another scene.The reason was that I went to the bathroom in the middle of the night, and when I came out I was very sleepy, my eyes were not open, and I habitually stepped over the quilt on the carpet and climbed directly onto the bed.When he woke up in the morning, he found me sleeping on the bed, lifted the quilt, and dragged me under the bed, "You are tired of work! You actually slept in my bed!..." While dragging, he also pulled my ears.

"It's not that I haven't slept in your bed before!" I was so angry that he cried.

"I'm not interested in you now!" He said coldly.

This really irritated me, I got up and ran downstairs, ran outside the houseboat and sat on the deck and continued to cry.It was already winter, and the wind was very strong on the lake. I sat on the cold deck in my nightgown and cried my heart broke, but he couldn't see it, and looked at me, as if I was dead.The neighbors on the surrounding yachts are looking at me curiously...

He still hasn't come out.

"Baby, can I do anything to help?"

An old lady on the yacht next door leaned out of the window and asked me, looking distressed.Because my hands and feet were red from the cold, and my lips were black, I curled up on the deck and shivered into a ball.Geng Mochi didn't come out until I was hoarse from crying and was about to die from the cold. Geng Mochi came out and carried me into the house.I was already in a semi-conscious state. He carried me upstairs, put me on the bed, and covered me with a quilt.

But I was still shaking, and I couldn't speak.He leaned over and hugged me, put his head on my chest, "I'm sorry, I can't control myself..." He hugged me tightly, kissed my face, and whispered tremblingly, "Kauer, I didn't mean to Yes, I really want to be close to you, but I can't, I really can't control myself, I don't want this."

I was still shaking in the quilt, tears seeped from the corners of my eyes and dripped on the pillow.

He climbed onto the bed, hugged me tightly under the quilt, warmed me with his body temperature, and rubbed my cold body with his hands over and over again, trying to give me as much heat as possible.

"I don't know what's wrong with me. I seem to be possessed by the devil. I can't control my emotions at all. It may be because I have been separated for too long. I don't know how to get along with you. I have suffered a lot in the past two years. Every day I just kept taking medicine and receiving all kinds of treatments. If it wasn’t for missing you, I would have died a long time ago. I missed you so much that I couldn’t hold my breath. All I know is that I want to see you, and I’m crazy I really want to see you, knowing that you have already started a new life, I should give up, I am a dying person, why bother to be so hard on myself. But there is no way, I am a stubborn person, I can't let you go... "

Speaking of this, this weak man who has been struggling tenaciously began to tremble, hugged me and choked weakly, I knew he wanted to give me the heat of life, but does he still have this ability now?
After a while, I heard him sigh in my ear: "Do you know why I don't let you sleep on the bed?"

That's exactly what I wanted to know, and my ears pricked up.

"Because of my body! After the operation two years ago, the doctor asked me to absolutely prohibit sex life. My heart is only able to maintain my basic vital functions, but it cannot provide such a strong passion load. This is what the doctor repeatedly emphasized. Yes, otherwise I will die on the bed instead of under the bed. But I am a man after all, facing you, I am very afraid that I will lose control and bring about disastrous consequences, so I dare not get too close to you..."

It turned out to be the case.

"For a man to do what I do, it's better to die!"

I turned over in the quilt, snuggled into his arms, and comforted him pretending to be relaxed, saying: "It's okay, crab, I'm already very satisfied to be with you, and I don't care about the rest."

"But I care!"

"I do not mind."

"You're a woman, of course it doesn't matter, I'm a man!"

"But I still love you, Mochi."

"I love you too, idiot!"

I curled up in his arms like a kitten, and with just one sentence, all the grievances and resentment I was full of disappeared, whether it was the end of the world or the end of time, I just wanted to make this moment last forever.Reunited with him for so long, this is the first time he has given me such a deep embrace, I almost don't want to think about whether he will go back to his old ways.He is a patient. He takes medicine as a meal every day. It is inevitable that he will feel anxious and grumpy. I have no reason to care about a patient who is not much longer.

but--

When he woke up the next morning, he was still the same, kicking me hard under the quilt, "Why are you sleeping, go get breakfast, you want to starve me to death?!"

I got up from the quilt, my eyes were sleepy, I didn't know if it was a dream at this moment, or what he said yesterday was a dream, which one was real?My intuition tells me that this moment must be real, because it hurts so much when he pulls my arm, it doesn’t hurt like this in a dream, and the voice in my ear is like thunder, “Hurry up, why wait! Let you sleep on the bed, Do you just want to be lazy?"

I obediently slipped out of bed.

Don't give up hope, his bad temper must be used by those temperless people around him, don't expect him to change in the short term.Sure enough, after that, he still got angry at every turn, not only at me, but also at his assistant.Poor his Japanese assistant came here with him all the way (not the one last time), and he was scolded every day, and finally had to submit his resignation.According to Geng Mochi's own admission, this is already the sixth assistant he has run away.

"You can be my assistant." He told me.

At that time, I was preparing the medicine he took at noon. Large and small bottles were spread out on the table.Am I courting death?

I pretended not to hear and ignored him.

"I'll pay you a salary." He began to lure me.

"Salary?"

"Of course, I won't let you work for nothing."

"Specifically? What is the specific matter?"

"It's very simple. It is to help me handle daily affairs, such as invitations to performances and communication activities. I will reject all of them. Then I will take care of my finances, sign and receive some reports and data, and organize and write them down. It's nothing serious. Complicated matters." He said pleasantly.I was still thinking, and he added, "I will give you a salary of [-] yuan a month, and there will be rewards if you do well. How about it, are you interested?"

"Twenty thousand..."

"Dollar!"

Or he knows me and knows that my favorite thing now is the dollar.

I agreed, think about how little I can do for him?Cleaning the house, washing and cooking, serving him like a master, but I have never seen him pay me a penny, and helping him with some work matters by the way, I can get such a high salary, what else can I do? willing.In case one day lives on the street again, there must be money to eat bread, right?
So besides taking care of his food and daily life, I have some more trivial things to do. As he said, it is not complicated. I rejected some invitations and signed for some bills and reports sent from Hong Kong. The record is OK.But I don't know if I don't do it. Once I did it, I was so surprised that I couldn't close my mouth. Geng Mochi, this man who looks rich, turns out he is really rich!

He has a large amount of property overseas, and many of these properties were transferred to his name by his New Zealand stepfather Xia Muye. It turned out that his stepfather had three sons, but each was prodigal, and only Geng Mochi's kindness and integrity were the best. Xia Lao's appreciation.As he got older, Mr. Xia was afraid that his hard-earned family business would be ruined by a few unfilial sons, so he distributed a lot of property and shares to Geng Mochi after he became an adult, hoping that Geng Mochi could help him keep the family business go down.It's just that Geng Mochi doesn't know how to do business and has no interest. The property is now managed by sister Annie's Hong Kong boyfriend.I heard from Mochi that Annie's boyfriend is a very successful businessman who helped him manage these properties well and sent reports from Hong Kong every week.Geng Mochi does not participate in the operation, and only needs to understand the operating conditions of some companies.In other words, he is now living on a houseboat in Seattle, reading books, playing the piano every day, and getting angry with his little servant and assistant, there are a lot of dollars, yen, euros, and Hong Kong dollars flowing into his account continuously .I never thought that this guy would have so much money. I'm afraid he didn't know how much money he had. No wonder Milan depended on him all the time.

I thought it would be better to be his assistant, but I didn't expect it to be the same.He is like a god to me, I am God's little servant, a servant is a servant, who makes me willing.But what makes me wonder is why is he not interested in me at all?I usually don’t even look at me, either playing the piano for a while, or sitting alone on the deck of the houseboat, looking at the endless rainy days in Seattle, smoking a daze.Most of the time it is reading. He has always liked reading, and he never leaves books wherever he goes.He asks for absolute silence when reading a book, unless he asks me something, I can’t speak, but I’m a person who can’t keep my mouth shut, and I always like to talk to him. At first he resisted ignoring him, and then he yelled when he got bored : "Shut up, you can't be quiet for a while!"

I may have gotten used to it later, I ignored his temper tantrums, and every time I was scolded, I always enlightened myself in my heart, he is a patient, I can’t argue with him, treat him as a child, treat him as a person who takes too much medicine Got allergies when he was acclimatized, when he was sick with bad weather, and so on.Such a enlightenment, the mood stretched a lot.Moreover, he is really a fascinating man. When he is furious, he is like a volcano, but when he is quiet, he is like a snow mountain. The light of forbearance emanates from the inside, covering me like a net... Many times, I am far away. Staring at him intently, always sad for no reason, I know that I love him so much that there is no way out, love is hopeless, and I dare not even think about the fact that he will leave in the end. Go crazy!
There is a famous Snow Mountain Rainier in Seattle. I remember that when I first saw it, I thought it was a big cloud in the sky, because it is hard to imagine that such a high mountain would suddenly rise above the horizon of the city. It rises, solemn and strong, and the whole body is white.I almost fell in love with it at first sight.During the two years I lived in Seattle, as long as it was not too cloudy, I could see Snow Mountain Rainier. Every time I saw it, I still had the surprise for the first time, and I didn’t feel numb because of familiarity.

This is like the man in front of me, even though I have been entangled with the man in front of me for so many years, I have been hit, hurt, and betrayed again and again, but I still yearn for him, look up to him obsessively, and have not numb this love because of the hurt I have suffered .In my eyes, he is an ancient Mount Rainier.For me, I prefer to look at Mount Rainier from a distance, see it floating in the sky of the city, it seems to be illusory, but it is clearly there, so that every time you inadvertently look up, you can see it , as a symbol of power, occupying your vision and influencing your thoughts and emotions.

Yes, I love this man as well. His existence is like the existence of Mount Rainier, more or less sublimated.Like Mount Rainier, this love is the pinnacle of beauty, or the incarnation of ideals. As long as it exists in your vision, even if you can only look at it from a distance, you can feel some sublime things in it.But would Geng Mochi understand my emotions?
(End of this chapter)