Indus so hurt

Chapter 30 Chapter Seven (5)
At this time, Huang Xiaoshi let go of all her indifference, she said, Mo Chun, I know you hate me, I know you hate me because of Mai Le!In fact, I hated myself too.I have always believed that you and Mai Le are more kind to each other than to me.I realized after I pulled you both into this disaster that I was selfish all along.Because I am selfish, I am destined not to be worthy of a friend like you, so it is destined that you two can stab each other, but I cannot!Mo Chun, beat me to death!You beat me to death for Mai Le!do you know?I have not lived well these years, I always thought that I would live a beautiful life, so I sold my youth and my body, but now, I have nothing!
You have Ji Rongge to accompany you all the time, and Mai Le has Zhang Zhichuang to accompany her all the time, but I have used my body to please Qiu for so long, but until now, he has not even said a word of greeting!In fact, when those little rascals surrounded me, I was also afraid. I just wanted to seek help from you and Mai Le. I didn't really want to hurt you. I really didn't mean it.

After speaking, Huang Xiaoshi hugged her knees and cried in the long hospital corridor.

Many people witnessed this fight, but no one was willing to come forward and pull my fist away for her!

Perhaps everyone has a steelyard for right and wrong in their hearts.

That day, when I turned to leave, Huang Xiaoshi suddenly hugged my leg tightly. She looked at me with bruises all over her face and said, Mo Chun, if I tell you, you and Mai Le finished fighting with my stepmother that day. I left the hospital and followed Ji Rongge home. I told Bai Chu and your brother. Do you hate me more?Now that I have done all the things that hurt Mai Le like this, let me let all the vipers out of my heart.

After finishing speaking, she looked at me with tears in her eyes, and she said, I don't know how I became like this, like a lunatic, I can't see any happiness between you and Mai Le!
She was talking to herself, but she didn't know that my heart was numb under Mai Le's painful cry.

The corridor of the hospital is so long, I walked and walked, but I couldn't walk through the wall that was hurt by friendship.

45 If possible, who should I give back to you?
Mai Le has been obsessed with his own world and refuses to come out.

The doctor said to Zhang Zhichuang, your girlfriend experienced a miscarriage some time ago, and now she has suffered such a serious injury. I am worried that she has consciously closed her feelings.

After the doctor finished speaking, Zhang Zhichuang froze in place.

He looked at the doctor in surprise, and looked back at Ji Rongge and me blankly.Ji Rongge's eyes moved elsewhere.All of a sudden, Ji Rongge and I seemed to be unforgivable sinners, we concealed Mai Le's past from him.

Zhang Zhichuang walked out of the ward without saying a word, Ji Rongge stepped forward to grab him, but he pushed him away, he said, you and the two of them cheated on me, have you cheated enough?Only now do I realize how pathetic and ridiculous I am!Do I deserve to be a cuckold in your eyes?After speaking, he left without looking back.

At that time, I don't know if the doctor saw it, but Mai Le's hand was gently held, and then loosened. There was a heart-wrenching sadness between her brows, and big drops of tears overflowed from the corners of her eyes.

I suddenly discovered that Mai Le has feelings for his surroundings!It's just that she no longer wants to let herself wake up.Thinking of this breaks my heart.

If Mai Le really heard what Zhang Zhichuang said, would he be more reluctant to wake up?
However, how do we ask a boy to love us while loving us, together with our scars, our sufferings, and our unbearable past, to love together?
Or, Zhang Zhichuang is a good man, but he is too rational.However, all these excuses are not reasons. I think that at the moment when Mai Le's tears fell, my heart hated him.Even though I hated him, I humbly begged him later, begging him to stay with Mai Le, because she loved him and needed him.

But Zhang Zhichuang's eyes were so cold, he said word by word, Mo Chun, you have to give me time to think about it.

Yes, he needs to weigh whether this scarred woman named Mai Le is worthy of his continued love?He is such a rational person, he should weigh it carefully.

However, in this world, there are also people who can do nothing for you without measuring.Socrates should be such a person.He would come to the hospital every day and look at Mai Le in the hospital bed in a daze.

He didn't seem to remember the viciousness when Mai Le beat him, he just murmured to the girl on the hospital bed, Mai Le, Mai Le, wake up quickly.No matter what you look like, you are the best, the best!
I think, when I was away, he might have said this to Mai Le, Mai Le, Mai Le, you wake up!If you wake up, I will never read Little H Books again, I will only read you!
Our most true love, in many cases, we can't always meet the most real people, and many times for our real people, we are unwilling to give our love to them.

Mai Le, tell me, are we stupid for doing this?
Many times, Huang Xiaoshi sneaked into her ward and was beaten out by me.

Huang Xiaoshi is crying, I am crying.However, no amount of tears could heal the scars she left on Mai Le.

At that time, there was also one thing that left an irreparable scar on my body, but I quietly hid it and refused to tell the third person, even Ji Rongge.

Because, this is my injury.

A wound that I will never heal.

That day, when I came back from getting the test sheet for Mai Le, I was about to open the door when I saw Bai Chu's hand holding Mai Le's hand tightly.He looked at her in a coma, with an unusually sad expression on his face. He murmured, Mai Le, Mo Chun said that you refused to wake up because you had suffered too much and too much damage.Am I one of them too?If at that time, I could have bravely shouldered my drunken mistake and allowed you to give birth to that child, would you be stronger now?Instead of this, never waking up again...

At that time, I was frozen into an ice sculpture.

I suddenly remembered that night, Mai Le and I accompanied Bai Chu to soothe the alcohol and relieve the sorrows. Bai Chu was crying because of Xi Lan's critical illness. The dead Baichu stayed behind...

Oh.

It turns out that the man I love has hurt so many women.

However, I am unwilling to let go. This man has been my ultimate dream since I was 14 years old.

"Bai" and "Chu" are both characters I love.

But Baichu, you are the one I don't want to let go of.

I folded my arms and wept silently in the corner of the ward.A long time ago, every time I watched a TV series and saw someone lying powerlessly in a corner and weeping in a low voice, I thought, how stupid they are, how uncomfortable this posture is.Only now did I know that when I was too sad, I was no better than them.

There is no place to rely on in this world, the only thing you can rely on is the wall behind you.

I suddenly remembered the various dialogues between Mai Le and Bai Chu before, the dodge in Bai Chu's eyes, and the disdain in Mai Le's eyes.

In the past, when Mai Le was pregnant, Yi Bo Yuntian said, I want to protect you, and I want to kill that man for you!However, I couldn't protect her at all, and even hurt her with the man I held as a treasure.I used to jump, dance, and talk to Mai Le all day long, we are good sisters, we have the same blessings and share the same difficulties!

However, today she is scarred because of me, but she keeps all the pain in her heart. If I hadn't appeared outside the door at this time, she would never let me know about all this.But I couldn't convince myself to rush in and slap Baichu hard, to say a fair word for my beloved Mai Le, the comatose Mai Le, and the bruised Mai Le!

I'll just hide in a corner and cry like a useless fool.

The man I've liked for so many years, Baichu.

Xi Lan said that he has always maintained his god-like perfect image in my heart.what about me?Why am I not, I am trying to deify this man I have liked since I was 14 years old, and I will never dare to face any scars with him!
To this day, I still hold such humble and shameless thoughts. I hope that one day, Baichu will finally love me thoroughly, and I will finally gain his love.The love between us is tight, without any scars, just like crystal!
Mai Le, Mai Le, if you knew that Yu Mochun, the friend you have made for 19 years, has so many humble little thoughts, would you still like her?Will you continue to treat her as your best friend?
Or, you will kick me away and say, get out of here!

But now you can only lie on the hospital bed, covered with memory wounds.If you can wake up, I am really willing to let you kick me, no, ten kicks, one hundred kicks, ten thousand kicks... I am willing to do it all.

After weeping humbly in the corner that time, this secret was quietly kept in my heart.It’s just that, in many midnight dreaming moments, I will think of Mai Le at that time. At that time, when Mai Le faced my questioning of the man who made her pregnant, she said——Mo Chun, I want to protect you more!

Yes.

You protected me, so you swallowed these thousands of bitter fruits into your stomach.

But what about me?
But in order to protect my initial feelings, I chose to continue to pretend to be deaf and dumb.

Mai Le, I also said that I want to protect you.

But, I'm really useless, from the beginning to the end, my existence, besides bringing you harm, is still hurting!
If so, who should I bring back to you?How can I give you back the peace, security and happiness hereafter?
46 It turns out that I am indeed a crow.

At the end of the summer vacation, when Mo Fan came to visit Mai Le, he frowned very tightly.He told me that Hu Weile hadn't come back yet.

At that time, Michael was already sober.I don't know if she found out that she should find a harder shell for her thin body?Many times, she doesn't look at me, she just sits in a corner and looks at the sun.I buried my head deeply, not daring to raise my eyes.Mai Le, in fact, I know that you woke up very early, but there is no fortress in this world that can protect you, so you don't want to wake up.Now, you wake up, but you still seem to be in a dream, and you refuse to communicate with the outside world.

I suddenly remembered that when Huang Xiaoshi’s diary was exposed by Qin Lan, Mai Le and I, who hid outside the wall and eavesdropped on the content, once had a dialogue about the “hurt” between friends——

Mai Le said, if you hurt me, Mo Chun, she smiled softly, bit her lower lip, looked at me, and didn't say anything more.

I said, if I hurt you, kill me.

Mai Le said, if you hurt me, I will forgive you!Because I know, unless you have to.Otherwise, Yu Mochun, a stinky woman, would never hurt Yao Maile, who is beautiful and beautiful!

Thinking of this, I suddenly raised my head and looked at Mai Le, who had been indirectly hurt so many times by me, who was staring at the sun in a daze. I gently grabbed her gauze-wrapped hand and said, Mai Le, I Finally hurt you, you kill me!
Mai Le's eyes slowly withdrew from the sunlight in front of the window and landed on me. She seemed to be thinking about something in pain. The expression on her face was dignified and weird. In the end, she didn't look at me, but looked at the sunlight murmur.Those subtle pronunciations are clearly old words.It's understandable if others don't understand, but I have heard it clearly before, so familiar... Mai Le said in a dreamlike voice, you...if...you hurt...me, I will...forgive you!Because...I know, you didn't...mean...Yu Mochun...this stinky woman...would never...hurt...the beautiful...Yao Maile!
At that moment, I finally grinned and cried bitterly in front of this scarred girl.

She said, I know, you...didn't do it on purpose...Yu Mochun...this stinky woman...would never...harm...the beautiful...Yao Maile!
Later, in order to cooperate with the treatment, she shaved off all her hair and left her head bare, like a fool.Her eyes were still clear, but she didn't speak much.

At that time, reports about the black brick kilns in Shanxi filled the entire media, and Mo Fan often stared at the newspaper in a daze.I foolishly thought at the time, if Mai Le hadn't suffered that serious injury, she would have jokingly said that Hu Weile probably stayed in the black brick kiln!

As it turns out, I am indeed a crow.

When Zhang Zhichuang brought the news about Hu Weile, Mo Fan, Ji Rongge and I were accompanying Mai Le.Mai Le didn't even look at Zhang Zhichuang, just stared at the sun in a daze, and Zhang Zhichuang just glanced at Mai Le who was covered in bruises, then turned and left.

In this world, in love, don't compare who has a harder heart, it will only make you colder.

After Mo Fan heard Hu Weile's news, he rushed out of the door recklessly.Ji Rongge and I were worried and followed closely behind him.

At that time, the sun was very poisonous, shining on our skin unscrupulously.

Mo Fan didn't stop, just kept running, and ran to the police station in one breath.

It turns out that fate will not stop giving you sorrow because you want to cry but have no tears.

When that little black man appeared in front of us, Mo Fan tensed up.He foolishly looked at the little black man who was giggling and dancing.

Is that little black man Hu Weile?Is it that good brother Hu Weile who hangs out with him all day long?Was it Hu Weile who once took off his shoes to him when they first met?
It's been a month and a half since we left.Zhang Zhichuang said that Hu Weile has been imprisoned in the black brick kiln for more than a month, and his whole body has gone out of order.

Mo Fan, who had been silent all this time, suddenly opened his mouth and cried out "ahhh", he hugged Hu Weile tightly.But Hu Weile ignored him. On the contrary, he felt that the person hugging him was annoying, which affected his dancing.So, after he pushed Mo Fan to the ground heavily with his black hands full of scars, he still smiled foolishly, and then danced non-stop. The shoes on his feet were black and had been trampled to pieces.

After Mo Fan saw it, he bent down and hugged his leg and cried.

Hu Weile continued to dance, kicking Mo Fan's lower abdomen without any consideration.

(End of this chapter)