Self-control: How to take control of your time and life?

Chapter 26 Potential Control
Start with the subconscious
The emergence of subconscious self-communication has grown into the most popular treatment for mental illness today, and it is also a very critical part of our self-control curriculum.The language of the subconscious mind is the language of the mind: the mind speaks to us all the time.

In the real world, you are oppressed and wronged a lot, and many ideas are not expressed and released, so you accumulate a lot of negative spiritual energy, which causes psychological diseases. Subconscious language is to release the suppressed spiritual energy.It can release negative psychic energy, refresh the psychic mechanism, and repair your self-control system.

In essence, it is a way of spiritual communication. It does not need to go through intermediate links, avoid the intervention of all uncertain factors, and directly enter the depths of the soul, and the communication can be completed in about 10 minutes.Not only is this a huge time saver, but it works so well that it gets to the depths of the mind and communicates with itself very quickly.Emotions, knots, and inexplicable emotions and emotions that are difficult for you to notice at ordinary times can be expressed and completely released at this time.If you often feel "difficult to control yourself", "involuntary", "led by the nose", and find yourself completely out of control, why is this?

1. Develop a passive and dependent way of thinking and behavior, and the subconscious lacks the ability to be independent.The subconscious mind feels powerless because it has not developed a proactive and independent mode.

2. After some trauma from the outside world, I often think that fate is determined by God.When you are carefully preparing for the wedding with your long-time lover, you lose your favorite because of a sudden car accident; when you pour all your money and effort into shopping malls, all your achievements are destroyed by a fire. You entrust your fate to unpredictable factors such as God and spirits.

3. There are too many pent-up needs to control.Because of the psychological shortcomings when I was young, the excessive compensation requirements in my heart cannot be met and understood, so I feel that I cannot control myself.You find that you cannot be understood by others, which creates a conflict between your inner needs and reality, and you also feel that you cannot control yourself.

4. The demands are too high to be fulfilled.Goals and pursuits are too high, and there is a strong contradiction with reality, which makes it impossible to achieve, but it is difficult to control and release the inner energy.Not all goals can be fulfilled. At this time, there will be a strong collision between the inner expectation and the loss of reality, but I can't control it.

5. The subconscious mind only learns the uncontrollable state.In the process of growing up, because parents panic when encountering things, making them feel that everything is out of control, so whenever they encounter things, they panic and feel out of control.If your subconscious mind establishes positive beliefs and let the subconscious mind fully confirm it, you will act in this direction.In this way, your material, spiritual and healthy wealth will be just around the corner, and you will find that everything you expect is easily obtained inadvertently.

two sides of the matter

If you know you are wrong, but oppose your own judgment in your heart, is this a sign of insufficient self-control?Rationality cannot control the subconscious mind, what can be done to improve this situation (such as doing something to enhance it)?This is the feeling of many people. They feel very guilty about the mistakes they have made knowingly and do not want to forgive themselves.

Plato realized very early that human psychology has a typical two-sided nature, one is positive and the other is negative.He once made a metaphor: "What is the human subconscious? It's like having two horses in a carriage." Of the two horses, one has been educated and has good morals and self-awareness. Has a good sense of purpose and mission.If only it exists, our future is limitless.Unfortunately, the fulfillment of good wishes is often spoiled by the presence of another horse.Unlike the previous horse, the other is dark, anxious, full of hatred and trauma, rebellious and difficult to handle.We don't want it to enter our lives, but it's still there.Because of its destructive nature, we tend to become negative, fearful, and even hateful.

Although the two horses live together every day, they are actually not in harmony. On the contrary, they often produce contradictions and conflicts, so we will fall into helplessness and confusion, unable to reach the pinnacle of success.Only by coordinating the two can success be achieved.In this explanation, it shows us the duality of human psychology and the characteristics and value of subconscious mind.

Break through the bottleneck of potential

Everyone's true self will have a powerful influence and appeal to others.It is usually said that a person's "personality is very attractive" actually means that he has not suppressed his creativity and has the courage to express himself.

"Bad personality" can also be called "repressed personality", which is characterized by the inability to express the inner creative self, so it appears stopped, withdrawn, imprisoned, and bound.The suppressed personality restricts the true self-expression, so that the individual always has reasons to refuse to express himself and is afraid of being himself. He locks the true self deep in his heart and consumes a lot of psychological energy.The symptoms of depression are many: shyness, shyness, hostility, excessive guilt, insomnia, nervousness, bad temper, inability to get along with others, and so on.

Everyone has unlimited potential in themselves, but they are not stimulated or suppressed.If you overreact to negative feedback or criticism, you can get sidetracked and stall your progress.

If you are shy when meeting new people, if you are afraid of unfamiliar situations, if you often feel out of place and worried, anxious and jumpy, if you feel tense and self-conscious, if you have facial twitches, blinking unnecessarily "Stress symptoms" such as nervousness, trembling, and difficulty falling asleep. If you shrink back and stay in the lower reaches, it means that the depression in your body is too heavy, you are too cautious about things, and you "think" too much, which limits the display and expression of your personality.

If you are unhappy and unsuccessful because you are repressed, you must consciously practice methods of disinhibition.

Don't think about what you "want to say" in advance, just open your mouth and say it.

Don't plan (don't think about tomorrow), don't think before acting. "Action - correct your behavior in action", this model seems a bit biased, but in fact it conforms to the principle of mechanism activation.A torpedo never "considers" whether its direction is wrong in advance, nor corrects mistakes in advance, it acts first-launches towards the target and corrects any deviations that may occur in the process of traveling.

1. Stop criticizing yourself.A repressed person is often indulged in self-criticism. No matter how simple the action is, he will say to himself afterwards: "I really shouldn't have done this." Say, "Maybe I shouldn't say that, and maybe someone else will get it wrong." Conscious self-criticism, self-analysis, and introspection are necessary, but a constant, day-to-day, self-guessing or reflection on the past The endless analysis of behavior can only lead to the failure of action in the end.So, pay attention to this kind of self-criticism and self-blame, and stop them immediately. 2. The training of speaking loudly.The repressed person speaks in a visibly thinner voice and shows a lack of self-confidence.You try to raise your own voice, but without yelling at others or using an angry tone, just consciously make it slightly louder than usual.Talking loudly itself is an effective way to relieve depression. It can mobilize 15.00% of the body's strength, enabling a person to lift a greater weight under normal conditions than under depression.The scientific explanation for this is that shouting out releases repression—it mobilizes all potentials, including those that are blocked and repressed.

3. Positive cues create strong mental stereotypes and guide underlying motivations into behavior.Positive hints with a sense of innovation will allow you to achieve your goals in a spontaneous mind.The language you suggest needs to be simple and powerful.For example: "I'm getting richer," "I'm making more and more money," etc.At the same time, your suggestion must be "feasible" to avoid conflict and resistance with the mind.If you think "I will make a million this year" is too unlikely, choose an amount that you can live with.For example: "I will earn 100 yuan or 50 yuan within this year."

discover your true self

Sometimes when you wake up in the morning, you will stretch out and say, "Ah, I had a dream again last night." Sometimes, you will also say, "I didn't have a dream last night." If you have a dream, the content of the dream must be rich and colorful.Sometimes, the plot in the dream will have a complete ending, but sometimes there will be inexplicable and incomprehensible images or things in the dream.Sometimes, friends whom you haven't seen for many years will suddenly appear in your dreams.

When we wake up, there are some dreams that we remember so well that we can even recall the details, and other dreams that are only fragmented and completely blurred.Freud believed that people will bury their wishes deep in their hearts.In the waking state, consciousness suppresses wishes.When a person falls asleep, the control of consciousness is relaxed, and the desire deep in the heart will be visualized, thus forming a dream.After a person falls asleep, the control of consciousness is relaxed, but it is not completely out of control.When the content of dreams overstimulates consciousness, these contents will be buried deep inside.This is the kind of dream we don't recall when we wake up.

In fact, we dream every day.Some people say that they didn't have a dream, but they can't remember it.A person has an average of 4 to 5 dreams a day, and according to this calculation, he has about 1300 dreams a year, and about 10 dreams in a lifetime.People are very greedy for comfort, and we will take the initiative to forget those things that are not good for ourselves.This is called self-preservation.In other words, people who never dream, they have nightmares every day, but they don't remember them when they wake up.The answer we've been searching for all our lives: who am I?We must let go of what is not me and see who we are.The main lesson of life is to discover the true self, and then to see the sincerity of others.However, the truth is often hidden behind layers of masks and personas.

(End of this chapter)