don't mess with me

Chapter 5 Burning the Car
At this moment, Liu Laoliu is different from the old man with evil intentions when he gave me the heavenly doll yesterday. Instead, he has an air of being the only one who is the only one in the world. To be a high official.

As soon as Liu Laoliu saw me, his face burst into a smile: "I know you must come to me again, but I didn't expect it to be so soon." Then he changed his face and said, "Is the number you gave me a fake?"

I frankly said: "Replace the last digit with 0 and try again."

Liu Laoliu took out an iphone5 and called me. He smiled satisfied when he heard my phone ring. Seeing that I also took out his phone, he said nervously, "Don't answer it!" he said while revising the notes.

I muttered: "A mobile phone used by Gou Ri for collecting broken items is better than Lao Tzu's."

Liu Laoliu was dissatisfied: "Why are you still so rude to me (why do you have to pay it back)!"

I took out the Tianjie doll and said, "From the moment you gave it to me, I was doomed to hate you forever!" I said, "Just change the phone with me and forget it."

Liu Laoliu spread out his palms: "Do you want dual card dual standby?"

"roll!"

Liu Laoliu grinned and said, "Actually, my request over the phone is very simple, as long as I can use WeChat and Momo."

I pointed in the direction of No. [-] Hospital: "Are there any good people around you?"

Liu Laoliu changed his expression and said to Tianjie Doll, "How is it? He didn't abuse you, did he?"

Tianjie Doll said: "It's okay, we have to get him to do more work for us as soon as possible before he has a nervous breakdown."

I protested: "Hey, I'm still here!"

Liu Laoliu said, "Is there anything you can do with me?"

The Celestial Doll said succinctly: "Get us a car." His tone sounded like the leader of an anti-human organization.It’s the kind in American blockbusters where you just buy nuclear bombs with a morally corrupt military enterprise...

Liu Laoliu stroked his chin and said, "Do you mean saving one or burning one?"

Tianjie Doll said: "Burn one, it's too time-consuming to save."

I almost cried when I heard it: "What the hell are you trying to do?" Is there a good word?

Liu Laoliu turned his head and shouted into the cabin: "Old Yan, Lao Yan?"

A black fat man came out: "What's the matter?"

Liu Laoliu said: "Is it okay to burn the car?"

The fat black man said strictly: "Two emotional coins."

The Heavenly Doll said: "I owe you first."

I quietly asked it: "What is emotional currency?"

Tianjie Doll said: "It's hard to explain to you clearly, it's a money-like thing transformed from the five emotions of 'emotion, anger, sorrow, joy, sorrow'."

Old Yan said: "Don't owe it too long, I'm not having a good time."

I said to Liu Laoliu: "By the way, what does the so-called 'burning' a car mean?"

Liu Laoliu spread his hands: "It's just 'burning' one, oh yes, when it comes to this, I have to remind you - go to the paper fire shop to buy a paper cart, it's hard for a smart woman to cook without rice."

I gradually had an ominous premonition: "Are you talking about burning money for the dead?"

"Then what do you think?"

I pointed at Liu Laoliu and cursed: "You old Sangbiao, why are you cursing me?"

Liu Laoliu said unhurriedly: "The rag doll has already spoken, what else can you not accept? Hurry up and prepare the car. Also, don't make too much of it, this is also the market as you go, two emotional coins It’s probably at the level of Fukang.”

……

I walked out of the mess in a daze, and the Tianjie Doll comforted me: "Don't have any psychological shadows, the food is still grown from dung, don't worry about it and you'll be fine."

I said angrily, "How can there be food grown from dung now?"

I thought that there must be places like shroud shops near the hospital, but I found a shop after detour for a long time. It was a very small shop, and the owner was watching a beauty pageant behind a pile of paper figurines. Say very exciting!

Seeing someone coming in, the boss greeted lightly: "Just take a look?"

I just nodded.Those who do their business must not be too enthusiastic, or they will be beaten easily.

I looked around and asked him, "Do you have a car?"

Seeing that it was confirmed that the customer came to the door, the boss immediately came to the door enthusiastically: "Yes, what brand do you want?"

"What do you have here?"

"Rolls-Royce, Bugatti Veyron, and Bentley have everything." As he spoke, the boss coded out a row of paper cars, all of which were well-made.

"Do you have Otto?"

"Oh... who are you trying to honor?"

"Don't worry about it, do you?"

The boss shook his head vigorously: "No, don't talk about Alto, we don't even have BMW and Mercedes-Benz, and the last one is the lengthened Lincoln. Why don't you change the brand so that you don't disturb the world?"

I sighed and said, "I can afford Otto."

The boss couldn't laugh or cry: "It's all 10 yuan, you really treat me like a car show?"

"Anyway, I want Alto, and if I don't, I'll change to another."

The boss said helplessly: "Then I'll give you a car now, but you have to pay extra, 20!"

"Your Bentley is only 10 yuan!"

"Isn't this your customized version?"

"Then get confused..."

It's time for the final results of the beauty pageant. Seeing me staring at me, the boss kindly politely said to me, "Let's see, I'll be fine in a while."

"Hey, the treatment you enjoy with this customized version is different. You can take it now." I gave him a cigarette, and casually commented, "Number 8 legs are good" and "Number 12 has a big chest, haha." It's all together.

The Tianjie doll said contemptuously in my pocket: "What kind of vision, No. 7 has a good temperament!"

As a result, when the top three came out, my boss and I were astonished—the judges selected the ugliest three with incomparable precision!

My boss and I were very disappointed at the same time. The boss also finished work, and angrily threw a stack of gold ingots on the table and said, "This is really a ghost!"

I asked cautiously: "Do you believe there are ghosts in this world?"

The boss laughed at me: "If you believe this, you can't do this to me!"

……

After leaving the paper version of the Alto 4S store, I went back to the garbage compound to find Liu Laoliu. The old guy was squashing a lot of plastic bottles one by one and then screwing on the caps, so that the original round bottles turned into salted fish Similarly, it saves space and is easy to bundle. It looks like a skill that has been honed after killing thousands of bottles, and it is too skilled to read.

I gave him the paper cart and said, "How to burn it?"

Liu Laoliu yelled at the cabin again: "Old Yan—"

Before he finished speaking, the black fat man Lao Yan came out of the cabin with a cigarette in his mouth, and stretched out his hand to me: "Car."

I handed the paper cart to him, and Lao Yan lit it with a lighter without saying a word, and then threw the paper ashes away when it was almost finished: "It's nothing to do with me."

I broke down and said, "It's none of your business—where's my car?" I turned my head inadvertently, and was immediately shocked: a brand new Alto car had parked in the yard!
Liu Laoliu is right, I can accept what the doll says, what else is unacceptable?But on this matter, I have always been skeptical. I thought that these two trash collectors must be playing a game of brain teasers with me, and I would be surprised when I saw the car!In this way, it is more useful to have a good relationship with the surname Yan than to know the deputy district chief - the big single-family villa in the paper fire shop is only 50 yuan!Thinking of this, I respectfully took the cigarette butt from Lao Yan's mouth and replaced it with another, and lit it myself: "Brother Yan, you have worked hard!"

Old Yan puffed out the smoke and said, "In the future, this kind of thing should be done less, for fear of being taboo."

I hurriedly said, "I'm not afraid!"

Lao Yan glared at me and said, "I'm afraid!"

I got into the car, touched this and looked there, then poked my head out and asked Liu Laoliu, "Does this car use gas?"

Liu Laoliu said: "Of course it has to be added, it's the same as an ordinary car."

I said, "Then why don't you burn me another gas card?"

Liu Laoliu waved his hand and said, "Burning the car is the limit. It's useless to burn all the money and cards."

"Why is it useless?"

"Burning real money is a 1:1 ratio, that is to say, if you burn 10 yuan or 10 yuan, you have to waste emotional coins. The minimum denomination of Ming coins is 500 million. Can you spend them if you burn them?"

I thought so, so I waved my hand and said, "Then I'm leaving."

On the way, I asked Tianjie Doll: "Who are Liu Laoliu and Lao Yan?"

Tianjie Doll said: "I will tell you slowly in the future—is the car still open?"

"It's okay, just driving a burned car... I still feel panicked!"

I drove forward slowly and found Zhao Qianqian on the side of the road when I was about to reach the community, so I poked my head out nervously and shouted: "Qianqian!"

Qianqian turned her head and saw it was me, she said unexpectedly: "Xiaoqiang, did you buy a car?"

I happily motioned her to get in the car, and Zhao Qianqian sat in the passenger seat and said, "Writing novels can make you a lot of money, right? Didn't you say that some earn tens of millions a year?"

"Yes, you are the backbone of our business at your age, do you usually read online novels?"

"I'm not interested. That's what those old women who went to college do?"

I complained: "Those born in the 90s like us will get old soon."

Zhao Qianqian was overjoyed: "Are you born in 1890?"

There was a traffic jam at an intersection in front of me, and I was greedy for novelty, so I drove to a road that I don’t often walk, trying to make a detour and come back. As a result, I was stuck in an alley, so I had to stop and wait.

At this time, a large group of strong men suddenly rushed out from the corner of the alley next to us, holding various weapons and rushing towards us, shouting and killing, both Zhao Qianqian and I were taken aback.

"Stop, little beast!"

"Kill it to death!"

I was relieved when I heard them call, it was not at me, Zhao Qianqian pointed out the window and said: "Look, a puppy!"

In front of this group of people, a puppy that was so dirty that its hair color could not be seen ran over quickly. Seeing that there was no way out, it showed pitiful eyes, and the people behind rushed up fiercely. Zhao Qianqian anxiously pulled me Sleeve said: "What about Xiaoqiang?"

I hesitated, gritted my teeth and said, "Let it in!"

Zhao Qianqian suddenly opened the car door, and the puppy seemed to expect that we would rescue it, and when it was a few steps away from the car, it swooped down, and it just happened to get into Zhao Qianqian's arms at this moment, and the cooperation of one person and one dog was perfect.It just so happened that the congestion in front of us was also cleared. As soon as I stepped on the accelerator and flew out, the crowd behind me was a step behind. Seeing us fleeing, they jumped up and cursed.

Zhao Qianqian looked back and wondered: "Why do a group of big men have trouble with a puppy?"

(End of this chapter)