Me and Empress Dowager Cixi

Chapter 34 The Death Day of Emperor Tongzhi (2)
After the death of Emperor Tongzhi, on his birthday and death day, the Empress Dowager would fall into a deep depression, not speaking, just sitting quietly, and the people and guards around her could only accompany her in silence.The situation is the same this year, everyone stopped all entertainment, kept a silent atmosphere, and shared the Empress Dowager's worries together.The entire Fengtian Palace fell into a sudden silence, as if no one existed in the huge palace complex.On days like this, everyone is extremely careful lest they invite disaster.Everyone was timid, unwilling to do things that would easily attract the Queen Mother's attention.My situation was the worst today, because it was my turn to serve the Queen Mother.I was doing what I was supposed to do carefully, for fear that something might go wrong.Time passed very slowly, but fortunately nothing happened, and the queen mother was not angry, and told me something about Emperor Tongzhi.I still remember one thing she said to me, she said:
"Emperor Tongzhi has been very intelligent since he was a child. He is not only diligent in learning, but also knows how to keep etiquette. Everyone who has seen him praises him for his beauty and kindness. Emperor Tongzhi not only has a generous appearance, but also is very noble. When he was young, I liked to see him running around in front of me very much. To this day, I still remember him a lot. On a summer afternoon, he and a group of young eunuchs went to play in the imperial garden, I ran into several peach trees head-on, many of which were already ripe. Emperor Tongzhi was very happy when he saw it. The little eunuchs around him tried to pick a few off immediately in order to please him. In the eyes of those little eunuchs, Emperor Tongzhi once They would definitely eat the peaches when they got them, but they didn't expect that Emperor Tongzhi just took a look at these peaches and didn't even move at all. Then, he asked a little eunuch to bring these peaches to my palace. After coming to me, he said that these are the freshest fruits. He didn't dare to taste them first, so he picked a few and sent them here for me to eat first. Think about it, Emperor Tongzhi was only ten years old at the time, so he knew how to keep Li, such children are really rare. But why is he so short-lived?"

As she spoke, the Queen Mother's voice became softer, and the indescribable melancholy came over again.It is inconvenient for me to say anything, and at the same time, I know that what the Queen Mother needs most at this time is to be alone.For a long time, the queen mother did not continue to speak, and I clearly saw tears of despair and pain in her eyes.I don't think anyone can understand the pain of a white-haired person sending a black-haired person more deeply than her.

After a long silence, the queen mother spoke again: "Is there any mother in the world who doesn't love her son? I do the same. I love him so much, lest he get hurt in life. Even so, I did it in the end. One thing was wrong: I made my own claim to marry Empress Jiashun for him. But I was also deceived, how could I have thought that Cheng Engong Chong Wenshan Shangshu's daughter was such a person?" When talking about these things, the Queen Mother He looked very angry, with an expression of resentment on his face, and even his voice involuntarily became louder.

In the eyes of the Empress Dowager Cixi, Empress Jiashun is her enemy, and Empress Jiashun seems to have the same hostility.According to common sense, it is common for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to disagree, but it will never develop to the point of mutual hatred.It is no secret in the Forbidden City that Empress Jiashun and Empress Dowager Cixi are at odds. The relationship between them is so intricate that it is impossible to explain it clearly in one or two sentences.But in my opinion, one of the key reasons is that Empress Jiashun looked down on Empress Dowager Cixi. As for why she looked down on her mother-in-law, the reason is also very simple, that is because she knew that Cixi had a relationship with Ronglu before entering the palace.In Empress Jiashun's opinion, a woman can only have one man in her life, and she shouldn't have any other men except her own husband.What's more, Empress Jiashun had a more important reason: after the death of Emperor Xianfeng, the empress dowager quickly promoted Ronglu's official position and gave his family members generous and preferential treatment.Empress Jiashun couldn't bear these things, so a series of things happened one after another.In fact, although the Empress Dowager had an affair with Rong Lu when she was young, she has severed this relationship since she entered the palace. Even if both of them are interested, there is no chance at all.In any case, it was precisely because of these things that Empress Jiashun looked down on Empress Dowager Cixi more and more.

The Empress Dowager Cixi hated Empress Jiashun so much that she would gnash her teeth whenever she was mentioned.It was the same this time, as soon as Empress Jiashun was mentioned, the Empress Dowager's voice became louder, followed by a long silence. "However, after all, the royal family is different from ordinary people's homes. No matter what happens, I have to endure it in order to take care of the dignity and face of the royal family. You can imagine how miserable my life was at that time. Later, until Queen Jiashun committed suicide, I The hard days are over." Finally, the queen mother said so.

The Empress Dowager was right, Empress Jiashun did commit suicide, most people in the palace knew about it, even the Empress Dowager knew there was no need to hide it.Regarding the death of Empress Jiashun, there are many rumors outside, and most people think it has something to do with the persecution of Empress Dowager Cixi.Some people say that at the time of Emperor Tongzhi's funeral, the Empress Dowager Cixi once said to Empress Jiashun: "A truly virtuous wife should die with her husband, and should not live in idling." On the day the Empress Dowager finished saying this At night, Empress Jiashun hanged herself from the beam.Regardless of the cause of the incident, it is absolutely true that Empress Jiashun committed suicide.At the time of her suicide, the child in her belly had been several months old and was about to give birth.If the child can be born smoothly, and it is a boy, Empress Jiashun will be established as Empress Dowager, which means that Empress Dowager Cixi will lose power.

The affairs of the royal family are always so complicated that they cannot be easily explained in one or two sentences.

Speaking of Empress Jiashun, I suddenly thought of several other poor people whose fate was doomed to be a tragedy from the time they entered the palace.These people were the concubines of Emperor Tongzhi. They had come to the palace with Empress Jiashun back then. It was only because Emperor Tongzhi died so early that their fate, which could have been less tragic, was completely thrown into the abyss of darkness.After the death of Emperor Tongzhi, the Empress Dowager Cixi did not intend to release these concubines, but she also did not want to see them, so she locked these people in the deep palace and has not released them until now.These people were still young girls when they first entered the palace, but now they are all very old.

When a person feels uncomfortable, there is always a lot to say.After a brief pause, the Empress Dowager's expression softened a little, and she continued: "If my son hadn't passed away, he would be 56 years old now, and he would definitely be a very good emperor, because he is so smart and kind. If he is the emperor of this country, not only will the people not suffer such pain, but I can also enjoy a few years of happiness with peace of mind." Emperor Tongzhi was born in 14 in the Gregorian calendar, and Emperor Xianfeng died 14 years later. With the support of Tongzhi, Emperor Tongzhi ascended to the throne when he was young.At that time, although it was said that Emperor Tongzhi was 13 years old, in fact, he was just over [-] years old.That's why the dragon robe we see in that palace for his coronation is so small.

A woman's resentment always comes faster and lasts longer than a man's, as is the case with the Queen Mother.When she was caught in the painful memory, if someone accidentally offended her, then she would definitely hate him for a long time, maybe for a lifetime.Just because I understand her temperament, when I hear her talk about those old sesame seeds and rotten millet, I feel very scared in my heart. I am always worried that there will be troubles outside that will anger the Queen Mother, and then implicate me.Whenever the Empress Dowager was so melancholy, her temper became particularly bad. I peeked at her expression, and the sense of majesty and oppression was so suppressed that I couldn't look directly at her.In this case, if someone or something offended her, she would not easily forgive the person who disturbed her.For example, when the Empress Dowager tells these sad stories, if I don't pretend to listen carefully, she will definitely hold her grudges. In this way, even if I spend the rest of my life kneeling in front of her and begging for mercy, It is estimated that there is no effect.

Let me put it this way, maybe some people will regard the Empress Dowager Cixi as a lunatic. How can it be possible for such a person to lead tens of millions of people to not fall behind?However, behind these seemingly crazy actions, I can clearly see the Queen Mother's true temperament, which is the great pain and grief hidden in her heart.It was driven by these two emotions that she could not seek the comfort of her soul, and became so irritable. Her anger burned countless lives, but at the same time, it was not burning her. What about your own life?
Think about it carefully, the queen mother is also a very poor woman, she has tasted all the pain that a woman may experience in her life.According to the Queen Mother's current power, she can do whatever she wants, but these are all superficial and material beauty, how can the pain in her heart be completely replaced?When she was young, she was like a bud that was about to bloom, and the time when she was with her lover Rong Lu must be the happiest moment in her life.However, unforeseen circumstances caused this flower bud to be selected into the palace before it opened and became Emperor Xianfeng's favorite concubine.If Emperor Xianfeng could treat her better, then her heart would not be so dry, but Emperor Xianfeng was a playboy, and he wanted to favor any pretty woman. In this way, the empress dowager he used Mind and time are naturally pitiful.Perhaps the only consolation that Emperor Xianfeng gave to the Empress Dowager was Emperor Tongzhi, but this child died so early, how could this prevent the Empress Dowager from being physically and mentally destroyed?For a woman, such pain is far greater than death. It is like a blunt knife stuck in the chest, which can neither kill people nor make people smile comfortably.After a long time of depression, the Queen Mother's nerves were surrounded by emotions such as depression, pain, disappointment, and depression, and her temperament became worse and worse.No wonder everyone in our palace is trembling and fearful.

I was supposed to serve the Empress Dowager today, but later the Empress Dowager asked me to leave early because she wanted to stay by herself for a while.Such an opportunity is really rare, not to mention there is still a question in my heart to be solved.After leaving the queen mother's bedroom, I went straight to the palace where the relics of Emperor Tongzhi were stored, and wanted to see if the little rabbit taken away by the queen mother had returned to its original place.After I got there, I looked left and right, but I still couldn't find the little rabbit. It must have been left by the Queen Mother herself as a souvenir.If my guess is correct, the queen mother will gently stroke the little rabbit when we are not around, recalling the happy time with Emperor Tongzhi.

The day slipped away unknowingly like this, and the night slowly enveloped the entire palace. Under the cover of night, the melancholy air that wandered in the palace during the day became thicker at this moment, and the people in it couldn't even breathe. It's getting more and more difficult, as if the sky is getting lower, putting all the weight on our heads.That night, the prophecy of the two academicians of Qin Tianjian was verified. The howling north wind blew up, and the paper windows rattled in the strong wind, which made people feel very uncomfortable.My serving time was until dinner time that day. My nerves were tense throughout the day, but I suddenly relaxed after dinner, and my spirit and body felt unspeakably tired.After bidding farewell to the Queen Mother, I hurriedly exited the main hall.When I walked to the promenade where I often stopped, the howling north wind brought a lot of cool air, which made my head a lot easier.Under the tearing of the north wind, those purple lilac flowers are flying one after another, like butterflies with folded wings. When the wind blows, the unpleasant smell on them is scattered everywhere, which makes me involuntarily Feel the breath of death.

I didn't want to go back to the bedroom so early, so I tried my best to endure the cold and stood on the corridor to look at the queen mother's bedroom.The surrounding area was silent, and occasionally a few eunuchs walked into the bedroom with things, and no human voice could be heard.Except for the north wind, everything seemed to be dead.The yellow corner lamp was lit, and within a short time, the north wind blew the yellow halos into pieces.This is a very bad feeling. I don't know if it's because I'm too sensitive. When I see this kind of scene, I always think of ghosts involuntarily.The north wind blows through the corridor, whistling under the eaves on both sides.On the horizontal board under the eaves of the promenade, many patterns were originally carved. Although the paint is a little peeled off, it is still possible to roughly distinguish what is carved.As royal decorations, those carvings are nothing more than some dragons, phoenixes, lions and other mascots.Under the shroud of night, I am really afraid that these things will suddenly jump off the horizontal board and swallow all the life in the entire palace.Now this ancient palace no longer gives me a sense of novelty, but makes me feel scared, as if this place is no longer a paradise on earth, but has become a melting pot of hell.I don't know where the danger comes from, but whatever happens, I don't think I'm going to be surprised now.

As the night deepened, the lights in the palace went out one after another, and most people had already fallen asleep, but my eyes still stayed on the lonely main hall.I imagined that under the lonely candlelight, an old woman was playing with a little white rabbit made of clay alone.I would like to thank today, it was today that allowed me to see the truest side of the queen mother, and I was a little moved from it.

(End of this chapter)