The flowers are still sweet in Pinellia

Chapter 33

After buying the return train ticket, Mu Yan returned to school a week early.Although You Zimo said that she should be given enough time to think, but at this moment she really needs to be alone for a while.

Gently pushing the door open, a musty smell hits the face.Mu Yan couldn't help frowning. After all, she hadn't been popular in the past two months. She put down her luggage, walked quickly to the balcony and opened the door.

The air became fresh in an instant.At the same time, she was awake and still had her restless heart.

She was alone in the empty dormitory.I thought this kind of life could last for about a week, but it was broken by someone's arrival on the third morning.

Dong Fangjing looked at the girl on the upper bunk, and couldn't help but exclaimed, "Mu Yan, why did you come back so early?"

Mu Yan smiled slightly, "Aren't you too, I also came here two days ago."

Dong Fangjing put down her luggage and said casually, "Mu Yan, did you come so early to meet him at N University?"

"No." Mu Yan shook her head, "It's not to see him."

"Then will you go to N University next door in the future?" Dong Fangjing asked hesitantly, since the debate match between S University and N University in the first semester of freshman year, Mu Yan never went to N University again.

"I'll never go there again." She raised her eyes and looked at Dong Fangjing seriously, "Shasha, it may be a bit abrupt to ask you this question, but I can only tell you."

"What's the problem?" Dong Fangjing smiled slightly, "Let's talk."

"Shusha, if one day, a boy told you that he has liked you for many years. What would you do?"

This question immediately caused Dong Fangjing to fall into silence, for many years, many years...

She once liked someone for many years.

After a while, she smiled and asked, "What's the matter, Mu Yan, did you have any new 'Aventures'?"

Mu Yan nodded, and said casually, "'Aventure' is not really counted, but something happened."

"What is it?" Suddenly, Dong Fangjing looked at her seriously.

Climbing down from the bed, Mu Yan told Dong Fangjing about the matter between You Zimo and her in detail, and told the girl in front of her the whole relationship together with the real relationship between them.

After listening to her narration, Dong Fangjing was stunned for a long time without returning to her senses.

"Shusha, what's the matter?"

Dong Fangjing didn't speak, just looked at her quietly.

Mu Yan thought Dong Fangjing was annoyed by her concealment, she hurriedly apologized, "I'm sorry, Shasha, he's actually not my cousin, I lied to you, but I..." She had to say this, she didn't want more people Knowing that her father died because of him.

"It's okay." Dong Fangjing shook her head lightly, she didn't blame Mu Yan, everyone has some secrets that they don't want to be known.What's more, such a thing, she understands Mu Yan's situation.

It's just that the relationship between You Zimo and Mu Yan still made her suffer a lot.Dong Fangjing breathed a sigh of relief, and then said, "Mu Yan, you mean he has liked you for a long time, right?"

Mu Yan nodded, it is still difficult for her to accept this reality.

"Then you came so early to avoid him?"

Mu Yan shook her head, then nodded again.She didn't know what she was doing.

Dong Fangjing smiled slightly, "Actually, it's me, no, we have already seen that You Zimo has special feelings for you."

"Really?" Mu Yan was taken aback.

"Yes." Dong Fangjing said, "The authorities are obsessed, but the bystanders are clear. It is impossible for a distant cousin to take care of a cousin like this. Of course, you are not that kind of real kinship."

Mu Yan only has that boy named Lin Xia in her heart, so she naturally rejects the admiration around her.

"Mu Yan, do you like him?" Dong Fangjing looked at her steadily, "You must tell the truth."

"I don't know." She knew how kind he was to her.It's just that she is very confused, and she doesn't know how to deal with this sudden feeling.She doesn't know if she likes him, she only has Lin Xia in her heart, and she never cares about other people's eyes and thoughts.but now……

Suddenly, another face appeared in her mind.One summer vacation made her think about everything between her and him. He smiled at that girl, has he completely forgotten her?
……

The sophomore life of the four began with the arrival of the other two.

After a boring basic Japanese class, Mu Yan packed her schoolbag and walked out of the classroom quickly.However, as soon as she left the Foreign Language Institute, a soft call made her stop in her tracks.

"Mu Yan."

Mu Yan turned around, but saw Song Hui walking towards her.

"Senior, why are you here?" She said in surprise.

Song Hui smiled lightly, "I'm waiting for you."

"Wait for me." Mu Yan was slightly startled, "Why?"

"I want to treat you to a meal." Song Hui looked at her with a smile all over his eyes, "I wonder if classmate Mu Yan would like to have dinner with me?"

Mu Yan couldn't help being amused by his words, she smiled sweetly, "Okay, but why did you invite me to dinner all of a sudden?"

Song Hui smiled slightly, "I want to see if you are still the one I know."

"Why do you say that?" Mu Yan asked with doubts.

"I always feel that you have changed a lot. When I met you a few times ago, you didn't see me. Seeing your absent-minded and dazed face, I don't know if something happened."

What Song Hui said made Mu Yan couldn't help smiling suddenly, did she actually change so much?
It is said that the authorities are obsessed, but the bystanders are clear.Maybe she has become really too much for everyone around her to notice.

"And I'm going to graduate next year." Song Hui seemed to be a little emotional, "I always feel that the time I stay on campus is so short, so I want to take this opportunity to have a good chat with you."

Mu Yan nodded, Song Hui is a senior this year, and the chances of meeting him again are getting less and less.The senior students are going to take the postgraduate entrance examination to prepare for the postgraduate entrance examination. The internship is in progress, and the time in school is indeed not as fulfilling as the previous three years.

She smiled helplessly, "Life always changes in unexpected ways. You are about to graduate so soon, and you have only known each other for only a year."

"Let's go." Song Hui smiled, "Go and talk about life."

After walking out of the school gate, the two came to a restaurant with southern flavor.

Song Hui seemed to be a regular customer of this restaurant, and after a while, sumptuous delicacies were placed in front of the two of them.

Looking at the delicacies on the jade plate in front of her, Mu Yan finally couldn't help asking, "Senior, I like all the dishes you ordered."

"Yes." Song Hui smiled slightly, "You are from City A, you should like these dishes."

Mu Yan nodded in a daze, these are indeed her favorite dishes.

"The insight of studying history should not be underestimated."

"Yeah." Mu Yan nodded with a smile, "There is still a year to go, and you are about to graduate. Will we meet again in the future?"

"The separation is for a better reunion next time. Don't worry, we will have a chance to meet in the future. At least I will send you my wedding invitation."

Mu Yan couldn't help being amused by his words, "It must."

Watching her smile, Song Hui couldn't help showing a smile all over his face, "Actually, what I wonder is why you have changed so much in one summer vacation."

"Has it changed?"

Song Hui smiled slightly, "It caught me off guard."

Upon hearing this, Mu Yan burst out laughing, she looked at him, "Senior, that's what I said just now."

"I can call it learning now and selling it now. The Song family learns alone."

The two smiled at each other.

Suddenly, Mu Yan gradually stopped smiling, and after a while she said softly, "Actually, I don't know if I should accept a relationship, a new relationship."

She paused, then continued: "It's that boy, you've seen him, maybe you don't remember him, he was the boy who was waiting for me at the gate of the History College during the freshman speech contest."

Song Hui nodded.He remembered that boy, who held that speech contest in the School of History, and his male intuition told him that that boy liked Mu Yan.

Mu Yan sighed softly, with unconcealable melancholy in her tone, "He said he likes me, and he has liked me for many years. Although we have a special relationship, he still likes me. But in my heart Can't let go of another person." A person she has hurt deeply.For You Zimo, she just regarded him as an older brother before.But You Zimo told her that he has liked her for many years.

Their relationship made her never think that he would have such feelings for her.

Song Hui asked, "Is it your ex-boyfriend that you can't let go of?"

Mu Yan nodded lightly.

"Ex-boyfriend? In this case, it may be a bit complicated." Song Hui frowned lightly. There were many realistic examples around him.Some friends' girlfriends still have the shadow of their ex-boyfriends in their hearts, and as a result, the two eventually broke up.

Mu Yan raised her eyes to look at Song Hui, and said softly, "He's at N University, Department of Law."

"N University?" Song Hui was taken aback for a moment.

"Yeah, it's N University just across the wall from us." Mu Yan smiled self-deprecatingly, "I applied to this school in order to be able to meet him when I volunteered to fill out the report. In fact, I originally applied for N University, but On the last day, I changed my choice. And I promised him that I would learn Japanese, but now..." The promise I made with him has long since disappeared with their separation.What is she learning this language for now, she can't figure it out.

"Why did you break up?"

"In the third year of high school, his studies dropped very badly, and some teachers found evidence that we were together. The teachers and parents worried that he would not be admitted to the school of his choice, so they talked to me and asked me to separate from him. I didn't want to accept it at first. , But what my mother said made me completely wake up. His life should not be limited to this. If I hold him back, then I am willing to let go. In order to separate from him, I can only lie to him and say I fell in love with someone else, someone he'd always seen as a rival."

"He finally believed, so we also..." In the end, we became strangers.

Mu Yan's words made Song Hui fall into deep thought, and after a while he asked again, "Now, is there any possibility of you getting back together?"

Mu Yan lowered her eyes, and Song Hui couldn't bear to look straight at the fragmented face, "He will never forgive me. I hurt him like that, hurt his self-esteem. I can't forget his cold and disgusted eyes, and He now..." She hesitated for a moment, then said softly, "There is a girl by his side, which made him smile again."

"A boy's self-esteem." Song Hui couldn't help but sigh, "Judging from your words, he should be a very good boy." Such boys usually have very high self-esteem, and no deception is allowed in their eyes.

"Yes, he has always been excellent." Mu Yan sighed lightly.

"Then what are you thinking in your heart now?"

"I don't know if I should accept him or accept another relationship." She still loves Lin Xia in her heart. If she accepts You Zimo, then it will be a kind of harm to You Zimo. She doesn't want to hurt her father. The child who traded his life for it.

"Mu Yan, when God closes a door for you, he also opens another window for you. However, if you choose to close that window with your own hands, you will lock yourself in the night forever. Are you in it?" Song Hui said seriously, "You will learn to grow."

"So you're persuading me to accept the other one too?"

"I don't know what you have with him, that is, with your ex-boyfriend, but I hope you can be happy. From the standpoint of a friend, I don't want to see you like this."

Song Hui's clear eyes made Mu Yan stunned, "Mu Yan, there are some things that cannot be forced, especially fate. When you cut off a fate with your own hands, it is really too difficult to connect it."

“In my freshman year of high school, I fell in love with a girl. I confessed to her twice, but she had a boyfriend, so she rejected me both times. When she broke up with her boyfriend, I thought I had a chance Yes, I showed my heart to her again, but she rejected me again. But when I graduated, a girl told me that she liked me for three years. I was very surprised, never thought she would like it Me. I didn't respond to her, I just said that there will be your happiness in the future. However, one day I suddenly found that I fell in love with the girl who silently liked me.

Obviously I have my own happiness, but I am coveting the happiness of others.Why do I like the girl who made my heart beat at first? Is it really because she is excellent? Maybe not.When I was young, I was frivolous and didn't know what love was.

To be honest, I really regretted that when I went to find the girl who liked me, she already had another person by her side.I once said that there will be happiness that belongs to her, and now it seems that the boy is.

If you miss it, you won't come back. "

"Senior." Mu Yan didn't know what she should say, everyone had an unknown side.She never thought that Song Hui would have such a story.Suddenly, she smiled helplessly, "Why doesn't life always go as one wishes?"

"Maybe this is life, a life that is not what people want, helpless, but has to go on. Although I am already a senior, I sometimes feel that my mind is not as good as that of a primary school student."

"Senior, what would you do if you were me?"

Song Hui smiled slightly, "I will try to accept another relationship."

Mu Yan was slightly stunned, "But this, isn't it hurting that person? If you still have one person in your heart, but accept another person, no one will be happy if you change like this. He knows that Lin Xia and I If I accept him, wouldn't it be a kind of harm to him?" You Zimo has always understood everything between her and Lin Xia, but even so he still chooses to stay by her side.

"Mu Yan, life is not perfect. Even if you have someone in your heart, you can't stay with him forever. We will meet many people in life, and there will always be someone who will accompany you through this life. Since he I know everything about you and that boy, which means that he really likes you, so he is willing to be with you. Even if you still have another person in your heart, he is still willing to be by your side. If you don’t even have this opportunity If you refuse to give it to him, it would be too unfair to him, isn't this a kind of harm to him?"

You Zimo said that even if Lin Xia would always exist in her heart, he would still be by her side.Because it is enough for her to be within his reach.Between Lin Xia and Mu Yan, he came too late, and her heart may never have a place for him to exist.However, he is willing to wait.Willing to wait for her to vacate an open space for him, a space that belongs only to him.

"Senior, will you accept the next person who likes you?"

Song Hui smiled lightly and nodded affirmatively, "Yes, the idea I have now is that I will always pretend to be the girl who likes me, go on step by step, and cherish the fate that may appear in the next stage." Quietly for her in the bottom of my heart Leave an open space that only belongs to her, and cherish the next person who will be by his side.

"The last question." Mu Yan stared at him, "Are you sure you will fall in love with someone else?"

"Yes. Song Hui smiled lightly, "At least after experiencing these things, let me know a saying that is to look at the eyes with green mountains and empty eyes, and advise you to cherish the person in front of you. "

"Mu Yan, why don't you let yourself try it, maybe you will fall in love with that boy. I don't know if there is any other special relationship between you, but I hope you can be happy."

Mu Yan lowered her eyes slightly. Her elder brother Zimo, the child his father bought with his life, had actually liked her for so long.

It's not that there is no love, nor is it that she doesn't know how to love, but that there is someone who has loved her for so many years, and the sad thing is, she has never known it.

Without Lin Xia, her whole life was plunged into darkness.But at this moment, a ray of light suddenly appeared in front of her, which was a window opened by God for her.

Song Hui's words seemed to echo in her ears, "When God closes a door for you, he opens another window for you.But, Mu Yan, if you choose to close that window with your own hands, are you going to lock yourself in the night forever? '

She didn't know what she should do. If possible, she really wanted to lock herself in the night forever.

only……

After staying in the dark night for a long time, she also wanted to pursue that ray of light that would lead her out of that sea of ​​darkness, the vast and endless darkness.

The sunny boy who once belonged to her had already been buried in that cold and windy night.

And now?

It has been said that she has no opinion.

Two years ago, forced to do nothing, she lied to Lin Xia, saying that she fell in love with someone else.

And now, take another's advice and accept another love?
Picking up the phone, she dialed the familiar number. One month was enough for her to settle her feelings.

However, the waiting 'beep' sound made her whole heart lift up.

Suddenly, a gentle and mellow male voice sounded.

"Mu Yan..."

How long has it been since I heard this voice?

Holding the microphone, neither of them spoke first.Time passed by second by second while waiting, and finally, she yelled softly.

"Zi Mo."

(End of this chapter)