Jade Guanyin

Chapter 9

I know the Third Ring Furniture City. It is just on the side of the West Third Ring Road. In my impression, it is not too far from the Shangri-La Hotel.Usually, when driving along the third ring road, you can often see its huge and timid signboard, but you have never parked your car and entered it.

In front of the furniture city gate, along the auxiliary road along the third ring road, all kinds of cars were parked, and several groups of people were moving in and out carrying furniture.I thought the business here was good, but after I went in, I found that in the huge furniture showroom that stretches as far as the eye can see, there are all kinds of furniture stuffed to the brim, but there are very few customers swimming among them.In most of the furniture stalls, the salespersons sat on the sofas for sale and chatted, or slept on the unsold desks.I walked all the way in, and every time I passed a booth, the salespersons stopped chatting and raised their heads, staring at me or staring at me with sleepy eyes, until they were sure that I was definitely not interested in stopping, and then returned to their free and lazy state.

I searched hall by hall, walking back and forth among the rows of furniture, ridge by ridge like a plow.After finding the second hall, I finally saw An Xin.She was at a booth selling bedroom furniture, looking at something in the distance, maybe she was just dazed.I really admire Liu Minghao's supernatural powers, there really is nothing in the world that he doesn't know about!

I walked into An Xin's stall and pretended to look at the furniture.The products sold here are wooden products that have long been outdated. The headboard of a double bed is covered with artificial leather that is neither pink nor red. It is too timid.An Xin found out that a customer had arrived, so she hurried over and followed me hard to sell her bunch of "cowardly jobs".She speaks fluently, with a soft voice, and her Mandarin is much more authentic than when I first met her, but those sales pitches are all clichés that I have long heard elsewhere.

"Sir, do you buy furniture?"—this is nonsense—"We are all solid wood furniture, the real thing, look at the wood grain..."—I think she really doesn't understand, good furniture doesn't have to be It's made of solid wood, and the bigger the wood grain, the less it's good wood—"Our bedroom furniture is currently discounted at [-]%, but if you get married, we can give you another discount..." At this moment, I turned my head and looked at her.

Her words came to an abrupt end, her eyes widened in surprise, and we stared at each other for almost half a minute before she opened her mouth in a daze, her voice suddenly becoming rigid and mechanical: "... If you get married, you will be married to me if you get married." You can get a [-]% discount for your certificate." I looked at her seriously and said, "I'm not married." She paused for a moment, as if she couldn't find what to say at this time, so she followed what she said just now: "Then you, Are you here to buy furniture?" I shook my head: "No." She tried her best to be professional and polite, and said, "It's okay if you don't buy, you can take a look." I said, "I want to talk to you " She replied very coldly but politely: "I'm sorry, sir, I'm at work now. We stipulate that we can't chat with customers during working hours. I'm different from you Beijingers. It's not easy for me to find this job. Yes.” Another customer passed by at this time, and she said sorry again, please forgive me, and left me to greet other customers, still using the same set of “genuine” sales rhetoric, and her voice returned to normal vitality.I stood silently for a while, then silently left her stall and walked towards the door.

I sat in the car on the side of the road, waiting for her.

Two hours later, the sun was setting, and the Third Ring Furniture City was closed for get off work.An Xin was the last to walk out of the gate among a group of salesmen selling furniture. Everyone scattered away. An Xin walked south alone. I started the car and followed.

That night I drove An Xin to the Jialing Pavilion restaurant, hoping that Jialing Pavilion could bring us some shared memories and emotional words.Although reminiscing about the past is obviously unlikely to be the theme of the evening.

Compared with two months ago, An Xin was visibly thinner and paler, which made people feel distressed.Thinness and paleness are signs of suffering, and suffering can make a person appear nobler, more beautiful, and even sexier.Looking at that still pure face, I really want to say I love you!But I didn't say it.I just asked her about her experience in the past two months in detail.I am eager to know how she survived this sudden blow.

An Xin acted calmer than I expected, she didn't complain or curse, and she wasn't even interested in talking about this "bad thing" again.Her tolerance and calmness moved me, but also made me more ashamed and self-blaming.

"I didn't find a job a month ago, and I was a little anxious. Then I worked in a small restaurant for two days, and then I went to the Third Ring Furniture City. An old customer who often came to our restaurant for dinner introduced me. , he is a salesman in a furniture factory." I saw that she was quite satisfied, so I laughed and was happy for her.I asked: "Are you really not angry when they framed you up like this and fired you?" I smiled reassuringly: "A face-to-face once told me that I was full of misfortunes when I was young. I thought, this is all It’s fate, and it’s useless to be angry.” I said, “You shouldn’t accept your fate. If you’re wronged, you still have to fight for it. If it doesn’t work, you can sue them. They can fire you by fabricating facts, why can’t you Protect your own legal rights?" An Xin said lightly, "I'm just a temporary worker, and they want to fire you, so they can't say anything. If you want to commit a crime, there's no excuse for it. It's useless for me to sue. Let them go, anyway. And I don’t write in the file.” I was infected by her easy-going attitude towards life, so I asked with a smile: “Oh, do you have a file too?” Unexpectedly, this sentence stunned her for a moment, and she smiled faintly , then turned her head and looked out the window, and said to herself: "Now, I just have to find a place that doesn't need files." What she said, and the expression on her face when she said this, are all strange Strange, as if there is really some "historical problem".The question in my heart is inconvenient to be revealed, so I can only pry it in a joking tone: "Hey, have you made any mistakes before? Is there any shameful record in your file?" Landing on my face, she said: "The biggest mistake I made, I didn't already tell you." "What mistake, I don't remember." An Xin looked away again, and she said: "My biggest mistake , I have that kind of relationship with Mao Jie.” Every time Mao Jie is mentioned, she always looks dead, which makes me realize that this is probably the deepest pain in her soul.I blurted out the guess that suddenly flashed in my mind: "Because of you and Mao Jie, that Zhang Tiejun left you, right?" An Xin turned to look at me, there was clearly something shining in her eyes, But she grinned and smiled bluntly.I could see her wanting to be silent, and at the same time I heard her confirm my theory in a barely audible voice.

"Yes." Neither of us spoke anymore, and I could fully understand An Xin's sadness and loneliness.I can further infer: She should still be nostalgic for that Zhang Tiejun, otherwise why can't she get rid of it so far!
We were silent for a long time, I have never been very good at comforting people, so somehow I asked inappropriately: "Did you have a boyfriend after that?" An Xin answered very clearly: "Not counting your words, No." Her answer made me unable to tell whether I was happy or sad, how could it be called not me, shouldn't I be counted?But thinking about it carefully, this answer at least shows that she puts my relationship with her in a special position.

I bypassed the topic and asked pretendingly casually: "Not long ago when I first met you, I went to visit you once and saw you with a 50-[-]-year-old man at the intersection. I think you two seem very familiar Yes, anyway, it’s not a normal relationship, so I didn’t call you, for fear of disturbing you.” An Xin asked in doubt: “When, who is it?” I roughly sketched the appearance of that person, anyway, he was very old.An Xin nodded suddenly: "Ah, it's him, that's my best friend." Best friend?What does best friend mean?It was inconvenient for me to ask directly, so I had to say with some malicious sourness: "Really, I thought he was your father. At his age, he and you can be regarded as a friend who has forgotten years." An Xin didn't answer, He only smiled lightly at my sharpness.Her refusal to answer seemed a little odd in itself.Her faint smile was even more ambiguous and suspicious.

I went on to ask: "I received the money you returned to me two months ago. It was sent from Nande, Yunnan. Who sent it? Is it from your family? Isn't your family in Qingmian?" An Xin said without hesitation: "It was sent by my friend. His surname is Pan. Did he write his name?" I said, "No, it's your name. It seems that the relationship between the two of you is still close." It’s really not the same as the other, they’re so good.” My tone was obviously thorny, but An Xin didn’t know whether it was pretending to be stupid or really slow, and she followed me and said: “Yes, he really treats me. It's very good." I looked at her beautiful face like a painting, and it was hard to see whether she was pure or sophisticated.I just realized now that she is an invisible girl.It suddenly occurred to me that perhaps this was exactly what had kept me fascinated by her, and I couldn't stop.

When we came out of Jialing Pavilion that day, I wanted to find a bar for Anxin, but I didn't go.Firstly, An Xin said that he had to go back early because he had something to do, and secondly, I was also afraid that there were too many acquaintances in the bar, and if someone ran into him and passed it on to Zhong Ning, it would be another disturbance.

I drove An Xin to an intersection on the West Third Ring Road not far from the Third Ring Furniture City, and got off the car.I insisted on sending her in, but she insisted not to let it go, saying that it was not easy to turn around in the narrow car.When she said goodbye to me at the end, I grabbed her hand, put that hand in my palm and rubbed it gently, then brought it to my mouth, and kissed it gently, she didn't Refused, but did not respond.

I said, "Do you still want to meet again?" She smiled and asked, "Do you still want to buy furniture?" She gave me a business card with the business items of their furniture factory written on it, and wrote Peace of mind name.She said: "Don't forget to take it with you next time. With this, I can give you a [-]% discount. I heard that you are getting married, so bring your marriage certificate and I will sell it to you at a [-]% discount. But our furniture belongs to the working class. You don’t like it.” After she finished speaking, she wanted to open the door and get out of the car, but I pressed the lock button, and the door locked with a bang.She turned around and looked at me suspiciously.I frowned and asked, "Who did you hear?" "What?" "Who did you hear that I'm getting married?" "He Chunbo from your class in the Taekwondo Club said that he came to our place to buy furniture that day. .” He Chunbo?I couldn't think of who this He Chunbo was at the moment. It was obvious that this name was someone I didn't know very well. It was impossible for him to know my relationship with An Xin, and it was impossible for him to imitate me in front of An Xin. , I asked suspiciously: "Why did he tell you about me?" An Xin didn't answer.

I insisted on asking again: "Did you ask him, or did he say it himself?" An Xin was silent for a while, and then admitted: "I asked him." I hugged An Xin.Although our postures were awkward in the car, I still hugged her tightly, and I whispered in her ear: "You don't want me to get married, do you?" An Xin let me hold her, even , her limbs cooperate with mine.But her answer still sticks to that kind of calmness that is extremely disproportionate to her age.

"You should get married. If you have a family, you will be stable. If you have a child, you will have nothing to think about. I hope you have a stable home, and I hope you live the happiest life!" Her words made me Touched, especially the last two sentences, I could clearly hear some kind of sadness in her heart from her superficial calmness.I want to cry.At that moment, I wanted to swear that I would simply follow her and leave everything I had, and live a life of poverty with each other!
But I didn't say anything, I just hugged her tightly, feeling extremely uncomfortable.

I know, I'm in love with An Xin.

But I can't decide to end the relationship with Zhong Ning.It is a ready-made wealth, a prominent career that is close at hand and within reach.For a man, a career means success, fame and a lifetime of status and sustenance!And love, I know, always has a cooling moment.

Am I being too cheesy?Too philistine?Too stinky?

Yes, I am vulgar, a philistine, and fame and fortune!But I also want to get true love, I also yearn for pure love, really, I love Anxin!
In those days, whenever I was free, I went to see An Xin, asked her out for dinner, chatted with her, and even stood in front of her furniture booth to help her sell business.But my heart is always dark, heavy, and full of contradictions.Every time I go to the Sanhuan Furniture City, I feel sneaky psychologically, like a thief, because I am always afraid of being bumped into by acquaintances and causing trouble.

My relationship with Zhong Ning also returned to normal in those days.The first time we regained contact was because my dad was scratched by a taxi when he was crossing the street in front of our house. After I learned about it, I hurried to Chaoyang Hospital.Zhong Ning has already arrived first, and is arguing with the driver who caused the accident outside the ward.We looked at each other both unintentionally and intentionally, and neither of us spoke to anyone, not even saying hello.I entered the ward first.My dad was not seriously injured, his leg was slightly bruised and bandaged, and his head was hit a bit, and further examination is needed.I was talking to my dad, when Zhong Ning hurriedly ended the quarrel and came in, helping serve tea and pouring water, instructing the nurse to take this and that, acting like a dutiful son and grandson.My dad was very moved, and so was I.We were so busy that the hospital started to bombard people outside, so we left.

Out of the hospital gate, it was getting late, Zhong Ning asked me first: "Are you hungry?" I nodded and said, "Let's find a place to eat." So we discussed a place and drove off in our own cars .

Then we ate together and ordered each other's favorite dishes.That's how we reconciled, and no one will mention the past.

I have only talked to Liu Minghao about my depression, I need to talk about it.Liu Minghao was the only person who knew An Xin.But Liu Minghao is also a realistic person. Of course, he will not encourage me to sacrifice everything for pure love. He said: "Sooner or later, the feeling for a woman will change. You can't fix your passion for a girl forever. Keep it going. Once a man reaches a certain age, he will not be so romantic. For us men, love is a fleeting thing, and the only real thing that can be valuable to you for a lifetime is career! If you want a career, don’t talk about feelings, whoever talks about feelings will be the downfall! Really, brother, you are still too young, you must listen to the words of the eldest brother, the words of the elder brother are all nonsense, but this sentence is definitely a wise saying! Absolutely It’s true!” I knew it was absolutely true, absolutely true.I understand all the reasons, but maybe it is because I am still too young to have fully passed the physical and psychological puberty, so I can't get rid of my longing for An Xin.This longing always tortures me day and night.

Yes, when I used to pick up girls, it was usually 3 minutes of hot air. As soon as I got into bed, my interest immediately weakened, but this was not the case with An Xin.Although I found a place to sleep with her a few times later, I dare not say that I am still infatuated with her body and every part of her body, but there is one thing that always excites me, that is the spiritual Attraction and tacit understanding in the heart are the kind of happiness in life that has never been produced when interacting with other girls.Physical interactions with other girls are not rare, but only An Xin can make my heart suddenly become loyal and kind.

Because of the peace of mind, every day between Zhong Ning and I was boring.Small quarrels emerge in endlessly, and blushing and thick necks also occur from time to time.Regardless of the size of the quarrel, the cause and content are all trivial.For this reason, Zhong Ning added a catchphrase: "You really don't look like a man!" That's right, I didn't know how to let her go, and she didn't bother to coax her when she was angry.Moreover, I have always had a grudge and a grudge against her for framing An Xin, so sometimes I quarrel with Zhong Ning purely to find fault, to vent the resentment in my heart, as if I couldn't control it.

Slowly, Zhong Ning seemed to know what was going on, she went to Liu Minghao, she asked Liu Minghao who I dated again this time, Liu Minghao pretended to be stupid: No way, you were cold last time It's been two months, and now he might not even dare to borrow his courage.Zhong Ning said: Don't fucking pretend for him, I don't know you guys yet, if you ignore your own little ones, then you must be dating another girl again!I don't know how much moral energy you have, who are you fooling!

That night Liu Minghao frantically called my BP machine and asked me to meet.I met him at the Moscow restaurant, and Liu Minghao informed me of Zhong Ning's search for him. He told me that Zhong Ning was inquiring about An Xin's whereabouts and whether An Xin and I were hooking up.I asked Liu Minghao how he answered. Liu Minghao said that he was unyielding at first, but later Zhong Ning used both soft and hard tactics, and even threatened Liu Minghao: You don’t want the final payment for the project of the Taekwondo Hall, right? You also don’t want the business of Guoning Company in the future. do it.Liu Minghao is a weakling, he finally betrayed, and offered An Xin's new unit.He explained: From Zhong Ning's words, it can be heard that she already knows An Xin's whereabouts.

When I first heard Liu Minghao say this, I concluded that this must be Zhong Ning's deceit out of thin air, and Liu Minghao just betrayed his friends because he was greedy for life and afraid of death.Later, Liu Minghao suddenly said that Zhong Ning had found an An Xin business card in my pocket, and this plot immediately made me speechless.Did An Xin give you a business card?Liu Minghao asked me.I didn't say whether or not, but my face was completely pale.I'm so fucking regretful, I can only secretly blame myself for my wife's carelessness.

Liu Minghao advised me to make preparations early, or to suspend contact with An Xin, and avoid this for a while.If it doesn't work, let An Xin change jobs and transfer safely.Liu Minghao asked me to report the situation and give advice because he didn't want to offend me. During the Anti-Japanese War, he must have been a "two-faced protector" who saw people and ghosts.However, I heard that at that time, the end result of this kind of "two-faced protection" was that one of them, or the Japanese devils or the Eighth Route Army guerrillas, was shot and collapsed!
On the surface, I was calm and stopped complaining about Liu Minghao, but actually I was very upset.Liu Minghao ordered a lot of dishes that day, but I didn't eat a single bite, and just listened blankly to what he said and what ideas he gave me.The dishes were cold, and the cream soup was congealed on the plate like a paste, but his ideas became more and more lively and evil.He also forced me to comment, asking me to say how his ideas are, whether he is smart or not, and he will never stop.I listened without commenting, and finally just said: "Are you still eating?" He looked at me, stunned for a while, and said: "Don't eat? Let's go." We got up and left Yes, Liu Minghao almost forgot to pay the bill.

I drove, walked home, and called An Xin twice on the way, but there was no reply.I drove the car to Xiangjiang Garden, and I moved back here after my dad let the car get scraped.When I entered the door, I saw Zhong Guoqing and Zhong Ning whispering in the living room, and when they saw me coming in, they both stopped talking.Zhong Guoqing stood up, gave me a stern look, and went to his own study without saying a word.Zhong Ning didn't look at me, didn't speak, his eyes were red, as if he had just cried.When I saw this posture, of course I understood it in my heart.

I didn't say a word, just walked into my bedroom.Zhong Ning called me at this time: "Yang Rui, come here, I'll show you something." Her voice was very hoarse, so it was a bit eerie.I had no reason to ignore her, so I went over and sat down on the sofa opposite her.

"Yang Rui, who do you think this is?" She picked up some photos from the coffee table and put them in front of me, "Do you know them?" I looked at those photos with a calm expression on my face, but my heart was full of excitement. Suddenly, his forehead was pounding.These are all pictures of An Xin, obviously taken secretly by someone, the background is a dilapidated residential building at dusk, and a round of dizzy sunset sandwiched between the residential buildings.I couldn't tell if it was embarrassment or anger, but I didn't explode, because I was shocked to see that An Xin in those photos was leading a one or two-year-old child.

I was trembling and asked, "Who took this picture?" Zhong Ning didn't answer, but asked instead, "Who is this girl, do you know her? And this child, do you know her?" I raised my voice : "Who took this?" Zhong Ning said coldly: "I took it, I let someone take it." My eyes turned red: "What do you want?" Zhong Ning said: "I didn't want to do anything, so I just I want to know who this child belongs to. I really can’t tell, this big lady looks like a college student on the surface, but in fact she has become a mother a long time ago! The child is about to go to the street to get jealous!" My eyes were straight , the lips are numb, and even the heart is deaf and unable to speak!How could An Xin have a child?Above my head, there seemed to be a dark cauldron pressing down.At that moment, all my memories and dreams of love and happiness flashed through my head like lightning, and then I saw them all shattered, and the sting that followed made me unable to restrain myself with the greatest madness. Hissed and shouted: "What on earth are you trying to do!" Zhong Ning was shocked at first, then picked up those photos, and counterattacked with a louder and shriller voice: "Who is the father of this child! Ah! Who is he?" Dad! Ah! Is that you! Ah?" She slammed the photo on my chest, and I really wanted to slap her, but I held back.I got up and went into the bedroom, slamming the door behind me.I could barely breathe and I actually burst into tears.

Zhong Ning yelled outside: "Yang Rui! Get out! Get out! You already have women and children, and you have lied to me for so long! You still have the face to live here, are you still a human being?" !" Zhong Guoqing also came out of the study, first said something to his sister, and then shouted sharply outside my door: "Yang Rui, come out!" I opened the door, but before I could see Zhong Guoqing's appearance, my face The next day I was slapped heavily, I was not prepared at all, I sat down on the ground, I don't know if it was bleeding from the teeth, or the bleeding from the nose flowed into the mouth, my mouth was full of red!I didn't fight back, I thought I had something to do to Zhong Ning after all, so I didn't fight back!
Zhong Guoqing gritted his teeth: "You fucking play hard enough, what are you going to do if you don't plan to stay in Beijing! Boy, don't think this is over, if you dare to come with me, I'll fucking kill you! "I got up, without saying a word, and went back to the bathroom to spit out a mouthful of dirty blood, then washed it, and then went back to the bedroom to quickly pack my clothes and some things into a handbag.Packing those things was just a sign of leaving, and it didn't calculate which things should be taken away and which ones can be discarded.Three times and two times to fill the package half full, pick it up and go.After Zhong Guoqing finished cursing, he went back to his study viciously. He was calling someone loudly, probably talking about me.Zhong Ning was sobbing on the sofa in the living room. I strode past her, walked a few steps and then turned around. I took out the mobile phone and the key to my car that Guoning Company had issued me and put them on the coffee table. , and left this gorgeous home brightly lit.

It was getting late, and I walked along the open Jingshun Highway towards the city without a taxi.No one dared to talk to me about those big trucks and cars pulling people.Later, I stopped waving on a fluke basis. Who would dare to stop and pull a tramp like a cub like me at such a late hour?I walked for more than two hours, and it was a little bit late at night before I reached Sanyuan Bridge.It was very windy at night, and the wind kept blowing on my face. My face was a little swollen, and my face and feet felt numb.

I thought over and over: it's all over, it's all over.

I was still thinking: Whose child is that?
I found out later that Zhong Ning followed An Xin out of get off work from the gate of the Sanhuan Furniture City that day.Followed to a residential area, saw An Xin walk into a residential building, and not long after, she came out with a child in her arms. When passing by a canteen, An Xin put her child down to go shopping.The child is about one year old and can already run side by side.Zhong Ning got out of the car and pretended to tease the child. She asked, "How old are you?" The child bowed his head and did not answer.Zhong Ning asked again: "What's your name?" The child smiled shyly, but did not answer.Zhong Ning asked again: "Where is Mom?" The child turned around and pointed at An Xin, and said, "—Mom!" Zhong Ning took out a photo of me that she always carried with her, and asked the child: "Is this Dad? "The child nodded ignorantly.At this time, An Xin finished shopping and turned her head to see Zhong Ning.

An Xin immediately recognized her!Zhong Ning didn't evade either, she stared at An Xin with hateful eyes, but she grinned viciously.

She said: "You are so lucky. To have such a beautiful child, his father must be not bad." An Xin didn't answer, she picked up the child and left.Zhong Ning didn't chase after her, and turned back to her car. At this time, her face was already ashen, she hated me to the bone, and she swore in her heart that she would make me pay the price!

She got into the car, and one of her attendants was in the car, putting away the camera and taking out the film.She took the film and said, "Let's go!" I only found out about this after the fact, but I also knew that it was not a misunderstanding.

Everything is my fault, I love a girl but dare not be with her openly, and the girl I don't love has to stay with her against her will because of some utilitarian purpose.I am a mean man.

It's all over!
I stood on the Sanyuan Bridge, and the Sanyuan Bridge was no longer crowded in the middle of the night. The surrounding space made me suddenly discover the magnificence of this old-fashioned overpass. The countless branches extending from its main branch lead to the east and west sides, and the Chengcheng Strings of street lights lead to the unknown distance.At this time, I suddenly hated An Xin.She kept saying that the most intolerable thing was men lying, but her biggest problem was lying!She kept everything from me, knew that I loved her but still hesitated to talk to me, always half-spoken, always ambiguous and ambiguous.She knows who I am, where I live, what relatives I have, where I graduated from, where I work, she knows everything about me!Even I still have a Zhong Ning, she is also very clear, I have nothing to hide from her!As for her, who is she, what happened to her in the past, how many men she has loved or been loved by, I still don't know clearly. Know nothing!
The more I think about it, the more disappointed I become, the more I think about it, the more angry I become, and the more I think about it, the more incredible I become.At the beginning, I chased her because I thought she was pure. In order to get this "pure", I completely lost everything I had!The reason and process of my chasing her is ironic. Not only is she not the innocent girl I imagined, but also, how could I have imagined it, she is also a mother who drags her children through the ups and downs!Maybe she herself can't tell who and where the child's father is, and she doesn't care about her, or this orphan-like child!

(End of this chapter)