Stars warm firefly

Chapter 18: The Riddle I Have to Guess (2)
After arriving at the destination, Xu Heyin jumped out of the car.

"Do you want me to go with you?" Chi Xiu asked.

Xu Heyin shook his head.She took the car and parked it in a nearby carport, then went in and asked the front desk to hand over the car keys to Bu Zidu.

Chi Xiu subconsciously looked inside, but he didn't see Bu Zidu.

"Are you thirsty? Let me buy you milk tea!" Chi Xiu suggested after Xu Heyin came out.

Xu Heyin also seemed to be tired from walking.She nodded, sat on the mushroom-shaped chair by the side of the road, watched Chi Xiu go to the takeaway window of the cold drink shop not far away, ordered two cups of milk tea, and then walked back quickly.

Xu Heyin thanked him after taking the milk tea, and then silently sipped the milk tea.But it felt like a ball of cotton was stuck in his throat, which was very uncomfortable.

The next second, as she swallowed the milk tea, tears also flowed down her face.Xu Heyin, who had been holding back all the way, finally released his suppressed emotions regardless, but Chi Xiu was taken aback.

"Why are you crying? Are you under too much pressure?" Chi Xiu had already heard what Du Meiling said, so he knew Xu Heyin's current situation.

"Actually, I was also very tired when I was preparing for the exam. Every time I was about to take the exam, I felt like I was going to explode, and I was dizzy all day long." Chi Xiu took out a handkerchief and handed it to her while explaining, "But he gritted his teeth and persisted. It’s enough to pass in one go. It’s like running, if you give up halfway, aren’t those running in front of you in vain?”

"I'm not tired, I, I just feel pain!" Xu Heyin wiped his eyes indiscriminately, sobbing.

"It hurts? Where does it hurt?" Chi Xiu asked nervously. He didn't see that Xu Heyin was injured!
"I don't know, I just feel pain all over my body." Xu Heyin simply cried loudly.Maybe because Chi Xiu is a stranger, she doesn't have to worry too much.

Chi Xiu looked at her quietly, and waited for her to stabilize a little before speaking.

"I've been like this before. It felt like my whole body was being torn apart.

Although I was just standing on the side of the road blankly at that time, I clearly felt that something had completely disappeared from my body... That feeling...it's hard to put into words. "

"Then what would disappear?" Xu Heyin asked softly with red eyes.

"Maybe... it's some wishes. But then I found out that I was completely wrong. So I found that the person I should blame most is not others, but myself."

"Then are you still blaming yourself?"

"Occasionally! But there are no ifs in life, and nothing can have a chance to do it all over again." Chi Xiu said thoughtfully.

He now clearly realizes that no matter how hard he works and how good he becomes, he can't change his mother's view of his father, and her hatred of the family full of quarrels and burdens in the past.

Xu Heyin suddenly felt that these words were very familiar, and the teacher at the repetition school had said similar words.It's just that she still wants to know if her father's affairs are discovered by her mother, whether they can continue to be together, and whether their life can still be the same as before.

"Are you going home? I'll drop by with you, let's go together!"

Seeing Xu Heyin gradually regaining his composure, Chi Xiu secretly breathed a sigh of relief.But he was still worried about her being alone, so he found a lame excuse to send her home.Xu Heyin was noncommittal, but since getting in the car, he has been thinking for a while about how to face his mother when he gets home.

The car was slightly bumpy.Xu Heyin who was sitting by the window actually fell asleep.With the shaking of the car, her head began to tilt slowly, and finally hit the glass suddenly. She subconsciously straightened up, paused and then tilted to one side.

Chi Xiu stared at her profile, with a hint of tenderness in his eyes.Then he looked out of the car window, and time seemed to go back to the past.At that time, there was also a girl like her, but the look on the girl's sleeping face was not only lonely, but also worried.

That girl is called Bu Xiaomo.

Studying hard to be a good boy was the only way Chi Xiu thought he could prove his innocence to his mother.So he won many first prizes, won many awards, and even a speech on behalf of the school was published in a newspaper.He thought that his mother could see it, and he thought that his mother would definitely go home after seeing it, but those were all his wishful thinking.If it wasn't for a chance encounter later, he wouldn't have believed that his mother was so close to him.

That day, Chi Xiu, who was in junior high school, was on the way home from school because of a breakdown on the bus that broke down on the side of the road.

When he passed a newly built community on his way home, he suddenly saw his mother Du Meiling sitting in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows of a fast food restaurant facing the street, with a seven or eight-year-old girl beside her.

She looked lovingly at the little girl's pink face, and from time to time wiped the chocolate residue from the corners of her mouth with a handkerchief.The little girl's star-like bright eyes and small cherry mouth are exactly the same as her mother Du Meiling.

Chi Xiu stood motionless not far away watching Du Meiling walk out with the little girl:
"Xiaomo, go slowly."

"Mom, the cartoon is about to start." The little girl was wearing a pink gauze dress, cuddling up to her like a little butterfly and coquettishly.

"Okay, okay, I got it." Du Meiling held the little girl's hand tightly, and the two walked forward with a smile, neither of them noticed Chi Xiu who was staring at them.

At that time, Chi Xiu had already grown very tall, and he was no longer the little boy who let his mother rock him back then.And Dad also found a job working nights in the warehouse.Although they obviously live under the same roof, they are strangers because of their different work and rest schedules.In Chi Xiu's eyes, Dad is like a star in the sky, seemingly close at hand but out of reach. If he didn't put hundreds of dollars of living expenses on the small wooden table at home every now and then, Chi Xiu would almost think Everything is his dream.When he woke up from the dream, his mother was still smiling at him, and his father didn't start gambling.

Looking at the figures, one big and one small cuddling up in front of him, Chi Xiu felt as if he had knocked over a five-flavored bottle.

In the past few years, Chi Xiu thought about all kinds of possibilities, but never thought that she would turn a blind eye to him.

Also, time is a magical magician, which can completely change a person.Just like him.Now that he has grown into a tall boy with a protruding Adam's apple, he has completely got rid of the shadow of his timid self in the past, so it is understandable that his mother can't recognize him.

Chi Xiu followed them into the newly built community.I heard that it is a newly developed community. Although the surrounding facilities are not complete yet, the price is already very high. Anyone who can live here needs a certain amount of financial strength.

It turned out that my mother was so close to me!
After that, Chi Xiu intentionally started to follow his mother Du Meiling by wandering around there after school.He learned that his mother married a businessman and gave birth to a girl named Bu Xiaomo.

He had met his mother's current husband, a handsome, shrewd man who dressed with style and taste, and knew that he was considerate of his mother.The fact that their family went on a picnic happily made Chi Xiu feel mixed.He had hoped that his mother's new husband would have many shortcomings, so that she might regret it if she was unhappy.But the opposite is true.After leaving them, my mother lived happily, as if he had never appeared in her world, and she didn't plan to let him appear in her future life.

So, what is the need for him to work so hard?

Although sad, Chi Xiu couldn't help but come here every day after school to take a look, even though he didn't know what he wanted to see.

However, his furtive observation was still discovered by someone.He once thought about being discovered by his mother or her current husband, but he never thought that it was Du Meiling and her current husband's daughter, Bu Xiaomo, who finally discovered him.

Du Meiling used to be a full-time wife at home. She didn't return to her husband's company to help out until Bu Xiaomo went to school. She just kept picking up her daughter after school every day.Chi Xiu once thought that Bu Xiaomo liked this kind of life very much, until later he discovered that she would always play alone for a while after school, and then return to school to wait for her mother.

In doing so, they discovered each other's secrets.

It turned out that Bu Xiaomo intentionally told the end of school later so that she would have more time to play, but unexpectedly, she discovered the mysterious Chi Xiu.

"Why did you appear near our school and downstairs of our house? Are you following us?" Finally, Bu Xiaomo mustered up the courage to stop Chi Xiu and asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about, I'm just passing by." Chi Xiu, who has become a high school student, was a little nervous when he saw his half-sister. He subconsciously didn't want a little girl to see his jokes, so he strongly denied it. with.

"Lie! I've seen you downstairs several times! Every time you look out the window of our house, and then you hide when you see someone, right?" Bu Xiaomo actually took out a small desk calendar Seriously, "Look, I marked the dates when I saw you! Last month you appeared five times, last month you appeared three times, this month until now you appeared twice, how about ? Am I right?"

Chi Xiu was a little dumbfounded looking at the dates marked by Bu Xiaomo with colored pens.The pages of the calendar show that in the past years, his self-righteous secret has long been exposed by a little girl.

"You still talk about me, aren't you the same? After school, go out to play secretly, and then go back to the school gate and go home with your mother as if nothing happened." The secret was also revealed.

"Hey, how do you know that's my mother?" Bu Xiaomo asked.

"This...what's the problem...you look alike!" He didn't expect Xiaomo to be so smart, so he hurriedly explained to make up for his mistake.

He didn't really want his mother to know about his presence.Because he already understood that his mother hated his father so much, he also knew that they were divorced, and he knew that his mother would never come back to them.He just wants to see his mother more, and hopes that one day he will have the opportunity to prove that he is different from his father, that he can be outstanding.However, it is hard for him to imagine how his mother will react when she really knows that he has been silently watching their lives, will she hate herself as before, and then disappear from her life?
"Don't lie to me! You are avoiding us so much, you must be looking for my brother, right? There used to be a big brother like you who came to play with him, and he suffered a lot after being discovered by his parents." Bu Xiao Mo thought that he had discovered the big secret, and then continued, "I don't need to tell the truth, but you have to tell me what is the secret code between you two?"

elder brother?Bu Xiaomo also has an older brother?It must be the man's son!Then he is also half blood related to Bu Xiaomo.

Chi Xiu suddenly felt that he didn't fully understand their lives. After all, he didn't see any boys in this house during his secret observation!

"Oh, I see, you are looking for my brother to initiate a challenge, right?" Seeing that Chi Xiu was silent, Bu Xiaomo gave another self-righteous answer.

"Fat, launch a challenge, what are you doing?"

Chi Xiu, who was as good at learning as discipline at school, never knew what a challenge was, and the messy things between the boys were basically insulated from him.Therefore, he was a little dumbfounded at Bu Xiaomo's conclusion, but he was somewhat curious about the boy who was also her brother.So, he went along and said that he was only interested in his brother and wanted to see his style.So, Bu Xiaomo took him for granted as his brother's admirer, and talked about his great brother, Bu Zidu, in front of him.

After Bu Xiaomo was promoted to junior high school, Du Meiling picked her up the next day because of her busy company affairs, which gave Bu Xiaomo enough free time after school, and then she actually asked Chi Xiu to accompany her to some places.It was only later that Chi Xiu found out that those were the places where Bu Zidu often went to play.

Bu Xiaomo is actually very envious of her brother, because he has the right to move freely, but she can't.Not only because she is a girl and she is still young, but also because she suffers from severe congenital asthma, so she has become the key care object of her parents.They refuse all places for strenuous exercise, even if they go out for an outing, they choose places with beautiful scenery and fresh air.They are even worried that the hair will cause the onset of microfoam allergy, and they don't even have carpets and other things at home.However, Bu Zidu always talks about his "adventure" experience after returning home. It seems that it is a proud thing to be able to play with a group of boys.

However, this kind of gait makes Chi Xiu feel childish, but also incredible.He didn't know why such a rebellious and unruly boy had so many friends at school and parents and sister at home, but he always lived alone.This made him faintly jealous.

Although Chi Xiu didn't know if his mother had told Xiaomo about him, or if his identity could be disclosed to her, he still wanted to confess to Bu Xiaomo that he was also her brother, and he would be her brother when she met him. When the annoying boys rushed out to protect her.However, he didn't say anything in the end.

Maybe in order to make up for this shortcoming, maybe in order to establish another image of brother in Bu Xiaomo's heart, Chi Xiu took her to many places she had never been to, such as the playground.

There, she watched the roller coaster whizzing past the tall bridge, and the deafening cheers of the people on the car were wrapped in the wind in her ears, and she couldn't help clapping her hands excitedly; while the pirate ship got off, as the machine shook higher and higher, The longing in Bu Xiaomo's eyes became more and more intense.Seeing her expression, Chi Xiu felt slightly sad.

"Let's go, let's play the carousel together." In the end, Chi Xiu chose a project that Bu Xiaomo's body could accept.

He helped Bu Xiaomo to sit on a little yellow horse, and he himself sat on the big white horse next to her.As the turntable rotated, the up and down wooden horse seemed to come to life, carrying them forward together.Seeing Bu Xiaomo's happy smile, Chi Xiu couldn't help smiling, because this was his first time to play in the playground.

In order to fulfill his promise to Bu Xiaomo, he took out all the pocket money he usually saved.

Because in his opinion, although Bu Xiaomo has a complete family in name, Chi Xiu feels that she is very similar to him, and is a lonely child deep in his heart.

That time they only played on the carousel, and then sat on the leisure chairs in the playground and looked at the happy people around them until the lights came on.The playground at night is brightly lit, just like a fairy tale world.Since the ticket price of the evening show is half cheaper than that of the daytime, the number of people who come to play is not less than that of the daytime.

After coming out of the playground, Chi Xiu thought of Bu Xiaomo's other brother, Bu Zidu.

He guessed his appearance, and a faint thought of eagerly wanting to see him appeared in his heart.

"Hey, big man, let me guess a riddle for you! What did you say floating in the air like fireflies, but not fireflies?" On the way home, Bu Xiaomo saw that he was preoccupied, so she asked him a question.

"I don't know." Chi Xiu answered honestly after thinking for a while.

"Look, do they look alike?" Bu Xiaomo pointed to the flickering overhead lights of the crane on the construction site in the distance.Her eyes blinked like stars, echoing the lights in the sky.

After getting along for such a long time, Chi Xiu found that Bu Xiaomo was a sensitive girl with a very rich imagination.A piece of warm sunshine and a few scattered stars will be given many vivid colors by her, as if they are elves from the lower world who come to accompany her.

Chi Xiu couldn't help thinking of his lonely life again.Even so, he is full of affection for the bricks and tiles of his home.He always felt that as long as the items at home remained in their original positions, his mother would reappear in front of him.

When he grew up, he suddenly understood that people can lie to themselves.

Once some things happen, they won't change; some people say goodbye to each other, and they won't get together again.

The sound of the car horn brought back Chi Xiu Piaoyuan's thoughts.He moved his stiff body slightly, and slowly closed his eyes.

Dad has passed away due to illness, and his family is gone. It seems that Bu Xiaomo is the only one related to the past.

When he came back this time, besides taking care of his father's funeral, he also wanted to see Bu Xiaomo again.

I don't know when, in Chi Xiu's youthful years, seeing Bu Xiaomo has gradually replaced the desire to see his mother.Maybe it's because I vaguely saw my own shadow in Bu Xiaomo, maybe it's because I got the comfort that I didn't get from my mother in the process of interacting with Bu Xiaomo.

Ever since he started to live on campus in the second half of the second semester of his sophomore year, he had never seen Bu Xiaomo again.

Although sorry, but also understand.After all, she has already entered junior high school, and her homework is also very heavy.But he was faintly worried that Bu Xiaomo would forget him.If there is such a day, what should he do?Or just disappear like this!
So Chixiu left without saying goodbye.It wasn't until he returned to China a few months ago that he wandered downstairs of Bu's house again.

Originally, I came to see Bu Xiaomo with the attitude of trying it out, but I accidentally found that girl who behaved as innocently as Bu Xiaomo.She will also reach out to catch the sun on the balcony, and she will also guess the riddle of "what is like a red firefly".However, he knew that it wasn't her.

So, where did Bu Xiaomo go?

He didn't ask Du Meiling, nor did he dare to ask.He knew that his mother didn't want him to enter his own world rashly.

But now, he got to know that girl, Xu Heyin, and also knew that she seemed to be very familiar with Bu Zidu, so the hope that was on the verge of dying grew again.He hoped that Xu Heyin could do him this favor, go to Bu Zidu to find out the news, and then let him see Bu Xiaomo again.

The car has arrived.

Chi Xiu patted Xu Heyin and sent her downstairs.Watching her figure disappear into the corridor, Chi Xiu subconsciously looked up at the familiar window.Lights were faintly peeking out from the room, and he seemed to see the girl in his memory hiding behind the curtains and waving goodbye to him.

(End of this chapter)