The days of cohabitation with gangster boyfriend

Chapter 89

He won't believe anything I say now. -
Although I no longer have any hope, I still can't get rid of the little sad fluke in my heart: "If I know that I am wrong now, can you still give me another chance?"-
"I have given you many chances, many times..." He sneered self-deprecatingly: "On your birthday, An Yifeng brought your information, and I understood everything. But I always have fantasies about you , when I saw you crying and eating your birthday cake; when I heard you accuse me of cheating your feelings, saying that I abandoned you; when I couldn't help kissing you... I said to myself, 'maybe You are wrong, she loves you, no matter what the original purpose is, she has been moved by your love.' So I give you a chance, I want to start again with you, I hope you can prove it to me: Yes I misunderstood you...but what did you give me in return? A knife in your bag?" -
His voice is very calm, but I can feel the turmoil in his heart, and I can even picture a very ironic situation in my mind: He helped me pick up the bag with a doting smile, and carefully wiped off the water on it stains, but he was so sensitive that he noticed something strange, opened it, and saw a knife, his smile froze... -
Why didn't he go upstairs and drag me out of the covers and beat me to death, instead of making me my favorite breakfast and patiently drinking coffee while I came downstairs? -
Why did he still ask me when he knew the answer? -
Just want to hear me tell the truth. -
No matter how much I have lied to him, as long as I tell him the truth, he is willing to give you another chance... -
Until last night, he was still making a promise to me, trying his best to redeem it, and what I rewarded him was a sharp knife hanging over his heart! -
Maybe I should grab his arm and shake it with all my strength, eagerly explain to him, and tell him over and over again, "I love you!"-
Of course I'd love to, but what's the point? -
I can hold his arm, but I can't hold his dead love anymore. -
Saying anything at this time is useless, even if I say it a thousand times, ten thousand times: I love him!I don't want to kill him! -
He won't believe it either! -
Feelings can't tolerate deception, he can't forgive me anymore... -
In fact, from the moment I gave up killing him, I thought of this ending. -
I don't regret it, not at all! -
I just feel sorry for him, I hurt him so deeply, my knife didn't go in, but left a wound in his heart that couldn't heal! -
"I'm sorry! It's my own fault to get to where I am today!" I picked up the knife on the ground and put it in his hand, looking into his eyes pleadingly: "You just see it for so many years... let me die quickly, okay? ?”-
I want to talk about my feelings for so many years, but I have no face to say it. -
"Death?!" He pulled me over, pressed me on the bed, and yelled at me, "Don't even think about it!"-
I also know he won't, how can he be so kind to me. -
I closed my eyes and lay down on the bed resignedly: "Then you can do whatever you want."-
Because he couldn't see, his heavy breathing was extraordinarily clear, and I knew he was trying hard to suppress his anger. -
Hearing the sound of sheets being torn, I opened my eyes in surprise, and saw him tie my two wrists to the bed with torn cloth strips. -
"what are you doing?"-
"A heartless woman like you is not worthy of love at all!" -
I haven't understood what he wants to do, he has already pulled my legs to the maximum violently, without kissing, and without a little prelude, he rushed straight into my body. -
Tied to the bed by him, watching him blindly pursue excitement, and recalling our first kiss and touch full of love, soft and slow like a drizzle, I understand how much love is contained in his tenderness and patience. -
A woman like me deserves to end up like this. -
(End of this chapter)