There are ways to speak and speak skills

Chapter 26 How to Control the Size of Things → The Law of Square and Circle (1)
To behave in the world, you should be "square inside and round outside", just like a copper coin, you must stick to the big principles, and don't worry too much about small things, but be more flexible.The ancients' "wisdom wants to be round and action wants to be square" is the recognition of the attitude of "square inside and round outside" and "round way and square virtue".

Today, in the market economy, only by combining principles and flexibility in interpersonal communication can we create a benign environment conducive to our own development and promote career success.

No rules, no standards
As the saying goes, "No rules, no circle".The operation of everything has its own rules, and the staff must also abide by the rules.For example, the necessary procedures, no matter how complicated or simple, must be done as they should be done; for example, no matter how difficult or easy it is to sign a contract, it must be fulfilled;Following the rules is a necessary guarantee for the normal progress of things. Without rules, no matter what you do, you will mess up.

Hu Xueyan, a famous businessman in the Qing Dynasty in my country, also paid great attention to abiding by the business rules that should be followed when doing every business. When issuing the passbook, he resolutely refused it, because firstly, he believed in Hu Xueyan's reputation, and secondly, he was afraid that after he went to the battlefield, there would be bad luck, so it didn't matter whether he wanted the passbook or not.But Hu Xueyan insisted on issuing a passbook, saying that this procedure cannot be omitted.The bank must issue a passbook when the customer deposits money, which is done according to the rules.Another example is that Hu Xueyan, Gu Yingchun and others partnered to sell silk and made 10 taels of silver at once. Except for necessary expenses, there was not much silver left.Since it is a partnership, Hu Xueyan still insists on distributing dividends. He said that even if he does not earn a penny, the dividends should still be distributed.Dividends are shared equally with partners, which is also in accordance with the rules.

It is precisely because Hu Xueyan follows the rules that everyone in the world trusts him, so Hu Xueyan's business is getting bigger and bigger.

Acting according to the rules has at least two meanings:

First, it can build credibility.The establishment of a good reputation has a very close relationship with the ability of the service provider to adhere to the rules.Only by doing things well and in accordance with the rules that everyone knows and should abide by, can people be convinced and credibility established.No one will trust a person who disregards the rules and does not follow the rules.

Second, it can guarantee safety.This security mainly refers to the protection of interests.For example, if you don’t do something that violates the law, if you do it, you don’t follow the rules. This may bring disaster to yourself; another example is that no matter how good a friend is, if you have a contract in business, you must sign it. What should you do? How to sign a contract must be done according to the rules.Because only a contract with legal effect signed according to the rules can be binding on both parties and effectively protect the interests of both parties.

In the world, the Jews have a strong ability to handle affairs, and they attach great importance to contracts.In the eyes of the Jews, the contract is sacred and inviolable, let alone broken.In the eyes of the Jews, breach of contract is absolutely not allowed to happen.Whoever breaks the contract, his personality is despicable, and his career is bound to fail.Once the contract is signed, it becomes effective. Not only do you abide by it, but you also require the other party to strictly abide by the contract. Ambiguity is never allowed in the contract, and no matter what happens, it cannot be changed.

Jews are always cautious when dealing with outsiders and doing business, because they don't know each other well, and they don't know whether the other party will keep their promises in the process of doing business, so they don't trust each other very much.Especially when interacting with someone who does not keep the covenant for the second time, the Jews will not believe the contract signed at all.Therefore, in communicating with the Jews, if you want to win the trust of the Jews, the first thing to do is to abide by the contract. No matter what sudden changes occur or under special circumstances, there is no room for this, otherwise You are wasting your time.

The Jews abide by the agreement, which is the first rule of doing things, and the second rule of doing things is never to evade taxes.The Jews have the most wealth in the world, but pay more attention to paying taxes than businessmen in any country in the world. In the hearts of the Jews, they have their own set of views. They believe that paying taxes is an invisible contract with the country. Whoever evades taxes , tax evasion, and tax evasion, whoever violates the contract signed with the country.Violation of a contract is unforgivable to a Jew.Please see the example below.

A foreigner traveled overseas, and when he came back, he hid a gemstone in his shoe in an attempt to avoid tax entry, but was found and detained by the local customs.When the Jews traveling with foreigners saw this situation, they asked strangely: "Why don't you pay taxes according to the law and enter the country dignifiedly?" According to international practice, the export fee for jewelry and other decorations generally does not exceed 8%. If you pay the import fee and enter the country in a dignified way, if you want to sell the gems in the country, you only need to try to increase the price by 8%.Therefore, it is really a wise move for Jews to pay taxes according to law.From the side, it also reflects the characteristics of Jews acting according to the rules.

Psychological tips:

Many people always hope to escape the established rules to gain benefits with a fluke mentality, just like the person in the story who hides gems in his shoes in an attempt to avoid tax evasion; while some people like to follow the rules and believe that following the rules is all success premise.To put it bluntly, looking at the combination of the two mentalities, it involves the topic of this section—the square and the circle of doing things.

Those who know how to act in accordance with the rules have mastered the measure of "square" and "round" in the invisible. the key to success.

Take a long-term view of the overall situation
As a person who is in charge of all aspects, it is very important to learn to understand the general situation and the overall situation while abandoning the details.

When Xiang Yu was young, he gave up halfway in studying and failed in learning swords, so his uncle Xiang Liang became angry.

Xiang Yu said: "It's enough to read enough to be able to write names, but to learn swords, you can only compete with one person. I want to learn how to be the enemy of ten thousand people."

Xiang Liang was overjoyed when he heard that, so he taught him the art of war, and Xiang Yu really improved a lot.

During the Warring States Period, Mi Buqi, a student of Confucius, was the magistrate of Shanfu County. When the people of Qi attacked Lu, Shanfu must pass through.

The elders of Shanfu begged Mi Zi: "The wheat in the field is already ripe, please let people go out to harvest it! Don't care whether he planted it or not. It is better to let Shanfu's people increase some grains than to stay in the field." Here, it is better to let the enemy get funding." They asked three times, but Mi Zi did not agree.

Not long after, Qi Bing came and took away the wheat.When Ji Sun heard about it, she felt very distressed, and sent someone to scold Mi Zi obliquely.

Mizi frowned angrily and said, "I haven't received any wheat this year, so I can plant it next year. If people who don't till the fields take advantage of the opportunity to get food, it will make them more hopeful that the enemy will invade. Can a single father harvest wheat in one year?" It does not affect the strength of the Lu State, if the common people have the mentality of getting it by chance, the world will be broken, and the damage to the Lu State will not be recovered for several generations."

Ji Sun was very ashamed when he heard this, and he said: "If there is a door to enter the land, do I still have the face to see Mi Zi?" .

Psychological tips:

Like Mi Zi, having a long-term and overall grasp is like having an extra eye.This eye grows outside the body, looking down from above.In this way, whenever you encounter a problem, you can see yourself and the other party; you can see the inside of the event and the outside of the event; you can see the present as well as the past and the future.Therefore, wise decisions can be made.

Of course, we do not mean to negate careful people because of this, and careful people can often work and observe in detail, which is more suitable for delicate affairs, but what we emphasize is: careful people usually have too high insight, It may not bring good results, because this kind of person tends to observe the subtleties from the small places, and sometimes ignores the big problems.

Therefore, from a comprehensive point of view, it is the correct attitude to do things carefully under the premise of maintaining a long-term development vision and taking into account the overall situation.

Paoding Jieniu is more than maneuverable
Be careful in handling things, just like playing chess, thinking about every step, and there is room for maneuver.

In history, Zeng Guofan was a complex figure with multiple influences.Those who praised him exalted him higher than the sky, while those who decried him regarded him as worthless.Zeng Guofan went through many twists and turns in his life, and finally walked out of the land of Xiangjiang River and became a famous minister of ZTE.He manipulated all kinds of power with ease, and finally succeeded.Therefore, some people in later generations called him "a man who works and preaches".

When Zeng Guofan led the Hunan Army to encircle and suppress the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom, the Qing court had an extremely complicated attitude towards him: don’t use him, the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom is so powerful that no one can fight against it; The army of disciples established by Zeng Guofan was also afraid of posing a threat to the imperial court.

Under this guiding ideology, the Qing government often used you to handle affairs in the appointment of Zeng Guofan, and did not give high positions and real power.The distressed Zeng Guofan urgently needed important officials in the court to speak for himself, so as to dispel the doubts of the Qing court.Suddenly one day, Zeng Guofan received a secret letter from Sushun from Hu Linyi in the army, and learned that this shrewd and capable Minister Gu Ming had recommended himself as Governor of Liangjiang in front of the Queen Mother.Zeng Guofan was overjoyed, Emperor Xianfeng had just passed away, and the crown prince was young. Although there were many ministers Gu Ming, Sushun was in fact monopolizing power. It would be great to have him speak for himself.

Zeng Guofan wanted to write a letter to Sushun to express his gratitude.But after writing a few sentences, he stopped.He knew that Sushun was headstrong and arrogant.As for the Empress Dowager Cixi, this woman is absolutely extraordinary. She has a high ambition, a strong desire for power, and a lot of scheming.How long can Sushun's authoritarian approach last?Will the Empress Dowager Cixi get along well with Sushun?After thinking about it, Zeng Guofan did not write this letter.Later, Sushun was ransacked and beheaded by the Queen Mother.Among the many officials' letters flattering Sushun, there is only a few words from Zeng Guofan.

After Zeng Guofan defeated the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom, he handled everything carefully, leaving room for room.Since Zeng Guofan's Hunan army robbed and swallowed up a lot of property belonging to the Taiping army, Tianjing, which was full of gold and silver and full of department stores, was empty of people and wealth.Zeng Guofan neither wanted to withdraw his property, nor could he withdraw his property. After entering Beijing, he was busy doing four things:

First, they handed over part of their power out of fear of overpowering the master;

Second, the reduction of 4 Hunan troops;
Third, for fear that the Qing court would suspect Nanjing's defense, they built banner barracks, and asked the banner soldiers to garrison Nanjing, and paid full wages;

Fourth, build a tribute academy to promote scholars from the south of the Yangtze River.As soon as these four strategies were implemented, the whole court really praised him. In addition to his great achievements, the Qing court could not pursue anything. Instead, he showed his respectful attitude and won the trust of the Qing court.

Zhuangzi told a story of "Paod Ding Jie Niu":

Once, the king of Wei watched Pao Ding slaughter an ox. He could only hear the sound of the clank of the knife hitting the bone, but he could not see the trace of the knife. After a short while, he decomposed an ox. He couldn't help sighing: "It's really amazing!"

Pao Ding put down his knife and said to the King of Wei, "What your majesty saw just now was not a technical performance, but a Tao. When I first slaughtered a cow, I saw only the shape of the cow. Two years later, I did not see the shape of the cow but only its bones. Now I am using my heart. Feeling it, even where the muscles and bones are connected, I can find the gap and cut the knife. The average chef changes a knife a month, and the master changes the knife once a year. Please look at my knife, which has been used for more than 10 years. It is still as good as new. This is because I know how to find room for the knife in the bones. The thin blade can cut easily, and of course it will not be damaged."

King Wei nodded after hearing this.

Psychological tips:

Pao Ding's indestructible knife benefits from his ability to see clearly the space between the joints.When doing things, people can fully grasp the room for success like a paodingjieniu, and they can handle various things with ease.Zeng Guofan is definitely a master of "unblocking the cow" in this area. He tried his best to create room for maneuver, which made the court embarrassed to punish him when it sanctioned him. Therefore, Zeng Guofan was able to act according to his inner thoughts in a wider space .

People are born with their own unique personality. Later, due to factors such as family background, social relationship, personal knowledge, upbringing, etc., they often show different opinions from others when doing things.The two opposing parties insist on their own opinions, and neither wants to bow their heads to compromise or make concessions, so that the problem will be difficult to solve.At this time, the best way is to "hang up" the problem and not solve it temporarily, and then start to solve it when the time is right. This is the so-called "leeway" technique.People who know how to do things can always create room for maneuver.

Little Fool and Daming are so confused
When you are alive, you should not be fussy about everything, be confused when you should be confused, be smart when you should be smart, be confused about small things, don't be smart, and only show great wisdom and resourcefulness at critical moments.

Silence is golden, and great wisdom is like a fool's way of self-protection.No matter how high your talent is, you must be good at concealing it, that is, the realm that seems to be absent on the surface is actually full.

In real life, there are indeed many things that should not be taken too seriously or competed too much.Especially when it comes to interpersonal relationships, it is intricate, intertwined, and too serious, either pulling arms or moving muscles, the more complicated it gets, the more it gets messed up.Go with the flow, pretend to be confused once, without losing your principles and personality; or for the sake of the public and the long-term, it is worthwhile to endure a little bit of grievance even for a while.Sometimes, when things get to that point, I just play with my wits once and give him a "fuzzy math" on the surface, which makes him confused and "rarely confused".During job evaluation and promotion, a certain candidate gives you an opportunity to ask for your "public opinion". You know that he is not qualified, but it is not easy to slap his head in person. What should you do at this time?No humming, no joking, no matter how serious you are when you draw a "circle", you don't lose your principle; your personality doesn't seem to be lost. When the person in question asks about it, he candidly point out his inadequacy. Don't ask, just let it go. The "confused method" is a wonderful way to avoid unnecessary personnel disputes and maintain a pure personality.

Both Taoism and Confucianism in ancient China advocated that "great wisdom is like a fool" and that one should "keep the fool".Foolishness is not real stupidity. People with great wisdom and foolishness give people the impression that they are open-minded, generous and honest, not showing their sharpness, and even a little dull.In fact, behind the "ruoyu" is the real wisdom and great wisdom.Great wisdom is like stupidity, this is the strategy of military strategists, and it is also the strategy of dealing with the world.

In the Spring and Autumn Period, there was a wise man named Xi Simi in the State of Qi.The doctor in power at that time was Tian Chengzi, who had the ambition to steal the country.

Once, when Tian Chengzi invited him to talk, the two of them went up to the high platform to enjoy the scenery. The east, west, north, and three sides were vast plains, with a panoramic view of the scenery, but to the south, there was a lush forest of Xi Simi's family, which blocked their sight.

Xi Simi returned home after the conversation, and immediately asked the servants to take the ax and saw to cut the woods.But just after cutting down a few trees, he told the servant to stop and go home quickly.The family looked at him inexplicably, and asked him why he was upside down?Xi Simi said: "In the wilderness of the country, there is only a forest in my house. Judging from Tian Chengzi's expression, he will not be happy, so I hurried home and wanted to cut it down. But then I changed my mind, at that time Tian Chengzi didn't say anything to express his dissatisfaction, on the contrary he was very friendly to me.

Tian Chengzi is a very scheming person. He is ambitious to steal Qi Guoli, and he is very afraid that someone smarter than him will see through his mind.In this case, if I cut down the tree, it will show that I have the ability to observe and observe, and it will make him wary of me.Therefore, if I don’t cut down a tree, it shows that I don’t know his mind, even if I have a small crime, I can avoid harm; but if I cut down a tree, it shows that I can know what others don’t say, and this will cause too much trouble! "

(End of this chapter)