David Copperfield

Chapter 4 Gradually Understand Personnel (2)
Chapter 2 Gradually understand personnel (2)
I thought she was really angry because she was so cold to me, but I was wrong, because she put her sewing aside, opened her arms completely, and gave me a big hug .I know she's working hard because she's fat, and whenever she puts on a little bit of force after she's dressed, several of the buttons on her back snap off.I remember when she hugged me, two buttons flew across the living room.

"Tell me about the crocodiles now," said Peggotty, who could not name them right then, "for I have only heard a little."

I don't quite understand why Peggotty looked so queer then, or why she was so eager to get back to the crocodile story.But I cheered up, and went on to tell how the crocodiles left their eggs in the sand, to be hatched by the sun; how we ran from them, and turned to irritate them--they're always inconvenient with their heavy bodies; Telling how we went after them in the water like the natives, stabbing them straight in the throat with sharp sticks.All in all, we used the whole system of dealing with crocodiles.At least I did; but I doubt whether Peggotty did the same, for she often thoughtfully pricked her face or various parts of her arms.

After talking about the crocodile, I started talking about the turtle dragon, when the garden bell rang.My mother is back.I thought she was even prettier than usual, and there was a handsome man with black hair and a black beard behind her.

He had walked back from church with us last Sunday.

When my mother bent over the threshold to kiss me, the man said I was a happier little fellow than a king.

"What does that mean?" I asked him.

He patted me on the head, but for some reason I didn't like him as a person or his thick voice.I didn't like that he touched my mother's hand when he patted me, and he did, so I pushed his hand away.

"Oh! Wei!" My mother scolded softly.

"My dear boy!" said the man, "I know he is faithful."

I saw my mother's face is so beautiful.She gently reprimanded me for my impoliteness; she hugged me tightly against her shoulder scarf, and thanked the man who took the trouble to drive her home.She held out a hand and the man took it with his own; I felt my mother look at me then.

"My boy, let's say 'goodbye'!" said the man, bowing his head—I saw him—on my mother's little glove.

"Goodbye!" I said.

"Okay! Let's be friends!" said the man with a smile. "Let's all shake hands."

At that time my right hand was held in my mother's left hand, so I stretched out my left hand to him.

"Oh, wrong, Wei!" The man smiled.

My mother pulled my right hand, but because of the previous reasons, I just didn't give him my right hand.I offered him my other hand anyway, and he shook my left hand affectionately, said I was a gutsy little guy, and walked away.

Then I saw him turn around in the garden, and give us a last glance with his unfriendly black eyes before the door was closed.

Peggotty locked the door without saying a word, and entered the drawing room with us.My mother, who usually sat in an armchair by the fire, stayed at the other end of the room, and sat singing in a low voice.

"Have a good night, madam," said Peggotty.She stood erect in the middle of the living room, holding a candlestick in her hand.

"Peggotty," replied my mother cheerfully, "I have really enjoyed myself to-night."

"A pleasant change brought about by a stranger," suggested Peggotty.

"It's a pleasant change for a change," my mother replied.

Peggotty was still standing in the middle of the drawing-room, and my mother sang again alone.Then I fell asleep, but I didn't sleep very soundly.When I woke up from the groggy, I saw them talking while crying.

"Never have such a man, Mr. Copperfield will not like it," said Peggotty. "I swear!"

"Oh!" cried my mother, "you're trying to drive me crazy! Is there any girl who is as mad at his servants as I am? Why do I call myself a girl? I wasn't married either. eh, Peggotty?"

"God knows you were married, madam," said Peggotty.

"Then how dare you," my mother said, "or how can you bear it—make me sad like this, and say such cruel things to me, and you know very well that I don't have a friend outside to rely on."

"For that reason," replied Peggotty, "I think it's even worse. No, no. No, not at all. No!"

I felt that Peggotty was so angry that he would throw away the candlestick.

"How can you exaggerate like this," my mother wept more bitterly, "it is so unjust to me! Didn't I tell you, Peggotty, that there is nothing but the most ordinary intercourse? You How can you be so heartless. You talk about pursuit, what else can I do, if people are stupid and abuse their feelings, is it my fault? Then what should I do, I ask you? Do you want me to shave my hair and dye it blackface , or scald your face with fire or boiling water, and try to disfigure yourself anyway? I dare say, Peggotty, you would like me to do that."

Peggotty was sad to hear that, I thought.

"And my dear baby," my mother said as she walked to the armchair where I was sitting and picked me up, "my dear David, are you saying that I don't love my own children, that I never What's the cutest little thing without a heart?"

"No one ever said that," said Peggotty.

"You hinted, Peggotty!" my mother replied, "you know that for yourself. You cruel fellow, what you said didn't mean that, did you mean anything else? You ought to be with me. I know, too, that last season I was reluctant to buy a new parasol for the sake of the guard, though my old green parasol was torn and tasseled. You know that, Peggotty, and you must not forget it." So she turned to me lovingly, and pressed her face against mine, "Do you think Mommy is a bad mommy, Wei? Am I a nasty, bad-hearted, self-serving mommy? Son, you say Well, Peggotty will love you more, Wei, I don't love you at all, do I?"

At this point, all three of us burst into tears. I think I cried the most out of the three, but I can guarantee that all three of us cried from the bottom of our hearts.I think it's true, and I'm so sad that I'm afraid I might have called Peggotty a "beast" for loving my mother when I was too excited.I think she must have lost not a single button, for when she was reconciled to my mother, and she knelt by the armchair to reconcile me, all her buttons burst like bullets from a gun.

We all went to bed very sad.After going to bed for a long time, I kept whimpering and couldn't fall asleep.When a violent whimper threw myself out of bed, I saw my mother sitting on the quilt, leaning over to me.Later she hugged me and I fell asleep in her arms.

I saw the man again about the next Sunday.But he appeared again in church; came home with us after service, and he came into our house to look at the famous pot of geraniums on the parlor window-sill.I don't think he paid much attention to geraniums, but he begged my mother to give him a flower as he went.My mother asked him to pick it himself, but he refused—I didn’t understand why—so my mother picked one herself and gave it to him.When he got the flower, he said he would never, ever leave the flower again; and I thought, what a fool of him, flowers always wither in a day or two.

Peggotty was not with us at night as he had been before.My mother was very polite to her—more polite than ever, I think—and the three of us were on good terms;I have sometimes thought that perhaps Peggotty objected to my mother's taking out of her chest of drawers the fine clothes she wore, or to her frequent visits to the neighbours; but I did not quite understand why.

Gradually, I also got used to seeing the man with the black beard.But I still disliked him as much as ever; I felt an uneasy jealousy about him.For this, besides the instinctive abhorrence of a child, and the belief that it was enough for my mother to be valued by me and Peggotty, there were other reasons, which I could not have discovered when I was so young.That idea, or anything like it, hadn't formed in my head at the time.At that time I could only make a few observations of things, but if I were to form a net of these trivial observations and catch anyone in it, I would not be able to do it at all.

One autumn morning, my mother and I were in the garden when Mr. Murdstone—I know his name now—came up on horseback.He saw my mother, reined in his horse, greeted her, and said he was going to Lowestoft to see some friends.He also said that his friend had a speedboat.And said that if I liked to ride a horse, I could sit on the saddle in front of him.

The weather was clear.The horse stood at the garden gate snorting and pawing.So I was sent upstairs to Peggotty's, saying it was to dress me up.At this moment Mr. Murdstone dismounted, and with the bridle round his arm, walked up and down outside the rose fence, while my mother paced with him inside.I remember Peggotty and I peeping at them both from my little window.I also remember when they were walking, pretending to observe the rose among them, they were very close.I also remember that Peggotty, who had been mild-tempered, suddenly became violent, and combed my hair vigorously and in the wrong direction.

(End of this chapter)