Sadness begins with your name

Chapter 4
In addition to falling into unrequited love for Lin Yuehe, how to deal with the sleazy pursuit of the ruffian young master Cheng Shanan is also a headache.

But what I never expected was that the family, the family I grew up with, would fall apart in an instant.

Spring is coming to an end soon. On a certain weekend evening, I just got rid of Cheng Shanan's pursuit and returned home when I saw Ning Qinglan huddled in front of the house with disheveled hair in the setting sun.

But the gate is open, and there is silence everywhere, only the hibiscus tree outside the gate is blooming reservedly, swaying gracefully in the evening breeze.

"Mom—" I called out carefully, tentatively putting my hand on her slightly trembling shoulder.

Ning Qinglan's eyes were dull, and she sat with her knees hugged on the bluestone floor at the gate, like a beautiful doll that was thrown into the roadside plaster and rolled around.

Got into a fight with dad again.I don't have to guess.

She still ignored me for a long time, I stood up and didn't plan to care about her.Hungry, but usually, in the cases where they've had an argument, there's no one to cook.

I'm going to make instant noodles for myself.

"He's gone." The three dumb words drifted into my ears with the wind, my feet stopped, and I turned around and asked her, "Who's gone? Dad?"

The empty yard gave people a bad feeling. I ran over and grabbed her cold hand, which seemed to have just been fished out of the snow, and asked in surprise, "Where did he go?"

She looked at me faintly, her beautiful Danfeng eyes glowed with water, but she hugged me and laughed loudly: "This murderer has finally left. Baosha, let's live together in the future, clean and tidy."

Dad is gone?

Last week he also promised me not to quarrel with my mother, and said that he would accompany me to Nanshan to fly kites and pick strawberries this weekend...Where did you go, Bo Yuntian? Why are you so dishonest about your own daughter!
I pushed her hand away, ran back to the house quickly, picked up the landline and called Bo Yuntian.Cell phones were not yet fashionable at that time, and he had a mobile phone called a mobile phone.

The phone rang for a long time, and my hands were shaking. After a few minutes, a familiar voice from a man finally sounded: "Hello——"

"Father—" I just called out, and the receiver was snatched away by someone. Ning Qinglan rushed up with a grim expression, threw the phone heavily, and slapped my face crisply.

"You are not allowed to call him daddy, and you are not allowed to talk to him again! Do you hear me!" She was like an angry lioness, with red eyes and messy hair, terrifying and frightening.

It was as if a big stone had been pressed against my chest, and I couldn't lift my legs even when I stood there, but she suddenly started hitting me like a nervous breakdown.Palm after palm, slaps like raindrops on my shoulders, back, and buttocks, one after another, she cried as she slapped, "Cry, why don't you cry, you damn girl!" His nails dug into the flesh of my neck, and his face was almost crazy.

But I don't move.

pain.How can it not hurt.

Neighbors have long said that Ning Qinglan had a history of mental illness in her ancestors, and she also suffered from mental illness in the first two years after giving birth to me, and it was still very serious.But I don't believe it, no matter what, she is my dearest mother, if I hear any adult or child privately discussing that my mother is mentally ill, I will smash the glass in his house, or beat those bad children to death.

When I was young, my mother took me to a monastery to have a fortune-telling. The fortune-telling monk said that "my life is like weeds, and my luck is like sand and gravel." I guess maybe Ning Qinglan's heart was cooled by this. So even the name is casually named "sand".

This is gossip.

I don't know how long Ning Qinglan cried that night, I just remember that when she limply on the cold floor, I said to her coldly: "You didn't beat me to death after all."

Just kill it.

When I die, I can ignore these pains and troubles. After I die, Bo Yuntian can start a new life alone in the capital, Beijing. After I die, Ning Qinglan can sleep with as many men as he wants. You don't have to worry about whether your daughter will see their ugly appearance when they indulge in sex.

She was sobbing weakly, and I picked up my schoolbag and left the house without looking back.

It's getting dark, the wind is blowing, and I'm so hungry.It was as if bugs were burrowing and biting in my stomach, tearing at the nerves that I thought were numb.

Tears fell on the main road, and the street lamps turned on one by one. I wiped it with my hands, and my face was wet, with tears and blood oozing from being scratched.

You said, on days like this, what is the point of my being alive?

I rummaged through my schoolbag and scraped together a total of five yuan. I bought a bag of spicy dried tofu and a can of Jinxing beer at a roadside stall. Cloudy, I walked over cheeky and asked him for one.

"One by one. This is a camellia." The dirty man took one and stretched it out, spreading his equally dirty palm.

I gave him a coin and borrowed his match to light the cigarette.

Sure enough, it was Camellia, and there were two rows of small characters on the cigarette box he threw on the ground. I picked it up and saw: When I first met Jun, it was like returning from an old friend.

Suddenly feeling sad, the rain fell melancholy again.I smoked tea cigarettes bought from beggars, sipped beer and ate spicy dried tofu, tears and pain, hearty.

I walked on the street with my head held high, my school uniform skirt filled with the wind, I sang a song: "Leave my sadness to myself, let you take away your beauty, from now on, I have no reason to be happy ..."

Since then, I have no reason to be happy.

I walked on the street, under the street lights, in the wind and rain, almost all night.When it was almost dawn, I couldn't walk anymore, curled up under the eaves of a store, and fell asleep in a daze.

It was a painful, cold, dark, long dream.And this dream was awakened by shaking hands vigorously.

Warm and eager eyes came into view, and a man's face gradually became clear.

"Bosha, wake up quickly."

is he an angelSuch a clean and beautiful face.I swallowed hard, feeling a burning pain in my throat.

Lin Yuehe picked me up, with regret all over his face: "What happened to you?"

"Teacher, she seems to be injured." Cheng Shanan's voice came in hauntingly, but I didn't have the energy to stare at him again.

Lin Yuehe pulled for a long time, and I was so stiff that I barely stood up.

"Cheng Shanan, come and give me a hand."

"Hey!" Cheng Shanan rushed forward to hold my hand, Lin Yuehe pushed his bicycle over and said, "Come on, I'll take you to the hospital."

It turned out that this store opened at the intersection that Lin Yuehe had to go to work every day.

"Teacher, you still have classes in the first two periods. I'll send Bosha to the hospital." Cheng Shanan looked considerate and caring and understood the teacher's expression.

"This..." He hesitated for a moment, probably feeling that Cheng Shanan's face was resolute and trustworthy, so he nodded.

"Let Cheng Shanan take you to the hospital first, and I'll see you when I go to school to make arrangements."

The hope that had arisen in my heart was thus wiped out, and I fell into a weak silence.

Lin Yuehe put his arms around my shoulders and comforted me softly: "No matter what happens, don't be afraid."

My heart was unexpectedly soft again.

Cheng Shanan dutifully helped me to his bicycle, and suddenly hugged my waist.

"What are you doing!" I was so shocked that I almost fell off the car.

"Hold you and sit in front." He glared at me, "You think I'm taking advantage of you? Don't worry, a gentleman doesn't take advantage of others." He dragged his voice and looked like he didn't want to be beaten.

"Trash." I scolded him.

Cheng Shanan was not angry either, he carried me onto the front bumper of the bicycle, stepped on the bicycle, and pedaled quickly.

I'm so tired that I don't care about myself as a young girl, lying in the arms of a teenager and falling asleep, and then walking through the streets of this city is a very cool and excessive thing.

Of course, the gossip was only heard after I recovered from my illness.

I don’t know how long I slept, and I don’t remember anything about the examinations and diagnoses I went through. I just woke up with a needle on my wrist, and in the white ward, there was a hanging bottle on the bedside.

The boy in black short-sleeves, torn jeans, and a shining cross chain around his neck was lying on the side of the bed, as if he was in a deep sleep.

I was disappointed that I didn't see Lin Yuehe when I opened my eyes.

He doesn't know that I secretly like him to the point of obsession. I secretly hide the chalk stubs he used up, the calculation paper he lost, and every homework he wrote in comments. In a small iron box in the bedroom.

Besides, I miss Ning Qinglan a little bit. I'm afraid that she will go crazy and commit suicide by herself.

Quietly pulled out the needle, and just lifted the quilt and got out of bed, the door of the ward was pushed open.Class monitor Chen Jianan and study committee member Mo Qianqian walked in carrying fruits and a bunch of lily of the valley flowers.

"Oh!" It was Cheng Shanan who jumped up and startled me: "Why did you pull out the needle!"

"Go away!" I pushed him and shook my hand to leave.

"Oh, Bosha, I heard that you were bullied by bad guys. What's going on? The monitor and I are very concerned about you."

The cat cries and the mouse pretends to be merciful, the most crooked girl in my life wears a red bow on her head, and she looks like Mickey.Mo Qianqian's wide-eyed, gossip-seeking look really made me want to beat her up.

"It's none of your business." Cheng Shanan said this for me, he glanced at the two class leaders with disdain, and pulled my shoulder: "Anyway, you can't leave, and the medicine hasn't been finished yet."

He was tall and powerful, and he held me in his arms with his big hands.

"Let go!" I kicked, and the salt water injected into my body replenished my strength.I stomped hard on his foot.

"Ouch." As soon as he let go, I took advantage of the situation and ran, but unfortunately, the back of my collar tightened, and Cheng Shanan, who was less than 1.6 meters tall, grabbed me into his arms.

What's more, he pulled me into his arms, lowered his head, and kissed me quickly and forcefully on the lips in front of the monitor and the study committee members.

He did it on purpose, it was definitely not an accident!

It was as if the sky had collapsed in an instant. When I opened my eyes wide and was speechless in astonishment, I saw Lin Yuehe entering the door with a warm smile, and then his smile froze, with a look of astonishment on his face.

Many years later, when I recalled this episode with a tap on Cheng Shanan's head, he would still smile triumphantly and say that my expression at that time was simply "turned pale".

Because of that sudden kiss from damn Cheng Shanan, I didn't taste the tremella porridge made by Lin Yuehe himself.

Because the lunch box was accidentally knocked over by the study committee member Mo Qianqian, who was also "fainted" due to excessive fright, and the soup splashed all over the class monitor Chen Jianan.

As a result, the two had sufficient reasons to flee in panic.

In front of Lin Yuehe, I raised my hand and slapped Cheng Shanan across the face.

But at the same time, the scandal between me and Cheng Shanan spread throughout the school as if it had grown legs.

Regarding this matter, Lin Yuehe didn't say much.But whenever I see him again, I always feel guilty and uneasy, as if I have cheated on someone in front of him.

"Don't think so much, little brain." A few days later, after evening self-study, I walked out of the classroom and met Lin Yuehe.He patted my forehead, smiled lightly, and said, "I asked Cheng Shannan, it was a misunderstanding. Don't worry about it, just concentrate on studying. It's almost time for the senior high school entrance examination."

I nodded, and the soreness in my heart was finally relieved. With his understanding, I have nothing to fear.

However, there is another rumor that I can't ignore. People around me say, look what kind of mother really raises what kind of girl. The wife of the Bo family is coquettish, and the daughter is even more amazing. She knows how to hook up with rich kids at a young age. .

Cheng Shanan is a son of a rich family, that's right.Compared to a family of civil servants and writers, Cheng Shanan, whose father is engaged in real estate development, can be called a playboy.This is why no matter how bad his reputation for lawlessness in the entire middle school is, the leading teachers will not punish him excessively.

In the words of Xiao Nuan at the same table, I fell headlong into Cheng Shanan, a muddy pit covered with gold.

(End of this chapter)