sister carrie

Chapter 68 (1)

Chapter 39 Light and Shadow: Two Worlds Divided (1)
After making up his mind this time, the result for Hurstwood was more self-confidence, and every day was a good day.Carrie, meanwhile, went through 30 days of mental anguish.

Her need for additional clothes--not to mention her desire for accessories--was all the more urgent because, in spite of her best work, she still had no clothes.Hurstwood begged her to help him through.She sympathized with him too, but the desire to dress properly was so urgent that the original sympathy had to die with it.He did not make repeated requests, but the desire to love beauty was always at work.This wish had a persistent effect, and Carrie hoped to be granted it, and she hoped that Hurstwood would hinder her again.

On Hurstwood's side, when he was close to ten dollars, he figured he'd better keep some change in his pocket instead of having to depend on others for hitchhiking, shaving, and so on.Therefore, even though he still has the money in his hands, he declares that he is penniless.

"I'm out of pocket," he said to Carrie one afternoon. "I paid the coal this morning, and now I have nothing but a dime or a quarter."

"I have some money in my purse."

Hurstwood fetched it, and went out to buy a can of tomatoes.Carrie did not realize that this was the beginning of a new order.He took out his fifteen cents and bought a can with the money.That's how he asked her for money bit by bit.Then one morning it occurred to Carrie that she would not be home before supper that evening.

"We're all out of flour," she said, "and you'd better get some this afternoon. We're out of meat, too. Shall we get some liver and bacon?"

"Anything," said Hurstwood.

"It's better to buy half a pound or three-quarters of a pound."

"Half a pound will do," said Hurstwood, willingly.

She opened her wallet and put down half a dollar.He pretended not to notice this.

Hurstwood bought flour--the canteen sells it in a three-and-a-half-pound bag--for thirty cents, and liver and bacon for fifteen cents for a half-pound.He put the sack and the quarters in it on the kitchen table.Carrie found it on the table.Not that she failed to notice that the amount of change was correct.It hurt a little to think that all he wanted from her was food.She felt that the heart was hard and unjust.Maybe he'll find work too.He has no bad habits.

It was, however, on this very evening, entering the theater, that a troupe walked past her in a beautiful new suit of variegated tweed.The young woman was wearing a beautiful string of violets, and looked very happy.She gave Carrie a good-natured smile as she went by, showing her perfect teeth, and Carrie smiled back.

"She can afford nice dresses," thought Carrie, "and if I can keep my money, I can do it too. I don't have a decent tie yet."

She held her foot out and looked thoughtfully at her shoes.

"Anyway, I have to buy a pair of shoes on Saturday, no matter what happens."

She was befriended by one of the sweetest and most sympathetic little girls of the half-dancers, because she found nothing in Carrie that would scare her away.She is a frivolous little Manon (Manon is the heroine in the famous novel "Manon Lusco" by the French writer Plevost (1697-1763), a frivolous and carefree woman. ——Translator), do not understand the strict moral values ​​in society, but are kind and generous to their neighbors.The corps dancers are not allowed to be presumptuous in conversation, but these things are talked about anyway.

"It's warm tonight, isn't it?" said the girl.She wears a tight pink bodysuit and a replica gold helmet on her head.She held a gleaming shield in her hand.

"Oh, yes," said Carrie.She was pleased when someone spoke to her.

"I'm literally being roasted," said the girl.

Carrie looked at her pretty face, with her big blue eyes, and saw little beads of sweat.

"There are more marches in this opera than in any libretto I've ever acted in," added the girl.

"Have you ever acted in anything else?" asked Carrie, amazed at her experience.

"A lot," said the girl. "Have you acted?"

"This is my first performance."

"Oh, yeah? I thought I'd seen you when they were here playing The Queen's Companion."

"No," said Carrie, shaking her head, "that's not me."

The conversation was interrupted by the sound of the symphony and the crackling of spotlights on the side of the stage as the team regrouped, and there was no chance to talk afterwards.However, the next evening, as they were preparing to go out, the girl reappeared by her side.

"They say the play is going on tour next month."

"Is it?" said Carrie.

"Yes, did you say you would go too?"

"I don't know; if they were going to take me, then I reckon I would."

"Oh, they'll take you. I won't. They won't pay you more, and you'll pay for your living expenses. I've never been out of New York. There's a lot going on here."

"Can you participate in every new play?"

"I can do it every time. There is a play on Broadway this month. If this play is going to go abroad, I want to give it a try and squeeze in."

Carrie suddenly understood.Obviously, it's not too difficult to be successful.If the play goes out of town, maybe she can find a place.

"Do they all pay the same wages?" she asked.

"Yes. Sometimes a little more. This play doesn't give much."

"I've got twelve dollars," said Carrie.

"Well," said the girl, "they'll give me fifteen dollars. You've done more than I have. They think you don't understand, so they give you less. You deserve fifteen dollars."

"Well, I haven't," said Carrie.

"Well, you'll make more if you get a spot the second time around," the girl went on.She admired Carrie very much, "You performed well, and the manager knows that too."

To tell the truth, Carrie did, unconsciously, play out in an atmosphere of joy and character.This is entirely due to her ability to be pure and natural, without any artificiality.

"Do you think I'm expecting to make more money on Broadway?"

"Of course you can," replied the girl. "Come with me when I go, and I'll tell you what to say."

Carrie listened with gratitude.She liked the little girl who played the soldier very much.She seemed very experienced, and she looked very confident in her gold-leaf helmet and military uniform.

"If I can keep getting jobs like this, I'll be sure of my future," thought Carrie.

But alas, in the morning, when the housework was heavy, and Hurstwood sat there, a burden to behold, her fortunes seemed darkened again, and there was no hope of relief.Under Hurstwood's tight management it was not costly to feed them, and the rent was affordable, but there was nothing left to do.Carrie bought shoes and other things, and the rent problem became very serious.Suddenly, a week before the fateful day, Carrie realized they were out of money.

"I don't believe it," she cried, looking into her purse over breakfast, "I don't believe I can still pay the rent."

"How many have you?" said Hurstwood.

"Well, I got 22 dollars, but I have to pay all the bills this week. If I spend all my salary this week on Saturday, then there will be nothing left to pay next week's bills. Look at your Is anyone in the hotel business going to open a hotel this month?"

"I'll see," replied Hurstwood; "he said he would."

After a short pause Hurstwood said:

"Don't worry about it. The grocer may be able to wait a few days. He can wait. It's not a day since we bought their stuff, and they'll be able to believe it a week or two later."

"Do you think he can do that?" she asked.

"I think so."

For this reason, when Hurstwood asked for a pound of coffee that very day, he stared at Oslog the grocer and said:
"You don't mind charging it to my account and paying every weekend?"

"No, no, Mr. Wheeler," said Mr. Oslog, "it's nothing."

Hurstwood, tactful in times of misfortune, said nothing further about it.Things seem to be easy to do.He looked out the door, then took his coffee and left the shop.A man struggling with despair thus begins his game.

Rent is paid, now it's the turn of the grocery store.Hurstwood managed to pay the ten dollars out of his own balance before claiming them from Carrie at the weekend.The next time he put off checking out the grocery store another day, he quickly got his ten dollars back.And Oslog's account for last Saturday was received on Thursday or Friday this week.

This entanglement made Carrie anxious to change the situation.Hurstwood did not seem to realize that Carrie had a right to have any say in anything.He devised a trick of his own, letting the money she earned pay for all expenses, while he himself didn't seem to have to worry about paying anything.

"He's always talking about worrying and stuff," thought Carrie. "If he was really worried, he wouldn't be sitting there waiting for me to come home. He'd find something to do. Nobody would." There's nothing to do for seven months, if you really want to."

The constant presence of this man, ragged and frowning, drove Carrie to seek relief elsewhere.There were two matinees in a week, during which time Hurstwood ate cold meals, which he arranged for himself.In addition, there are two days of rehearsals, which usually start at [-]:[-] am and often end at [-]:[-] pm.Besides that, Carrie was going to see a troupe or two, including the blue-eyed soldier in the gold helmet, as a relief from the dreary atmosphere of her husband sitting at home all day brooding chickens. , have some fun.

The blue-eyed soldier's name was Osborne--Lola Osborne.The room she lived in was on No. 19 Street near Fourth Street, which has now been converted into an office building entirely.Here she has a comfortable room overlooking a good number of backyards, where trees of all kinds grow and are pleasant to the eye.

"Is your home in New York?" she asked Laura one day.

"Yes, but I don't get along with my family. They always want people to have their way. Do you live here?"

"Yes," said Carrie.

"With the family?"

Carrie was ashamed to admit that she was married.She usually talks about earning more, and how anxious she is about her future, but now, with a straightforward question in front of her, she can't tell this girl.

"Living with some relatives," she replied.

Miss Osborne took it for granted that Carrie, like herself, had her own time.She made Carrie stay so often, or advocated going out and about, and so on, that Carrie began not to pay attention to supper time.Hurstwood was aware of this, but felt himself at a disadvantage in quarreling with her.Several times she came home too late, and had to get a meal in less than an hour before going to the theatre.

"Are you rehearsing this afternoon, too?" Hurstwood asked once, completely covering up the ironic protest and discontent with which he had asked the question.

"No. I'm looking for another position," replied Carrie.

(End of this chapter)