The wisdom of I Ching

Chapter 98 Beware of People Who Please You——Lai Dui, Fierce

【Original Code】

Six three, Laidui, fierce.

"Xiang" said: "The evil of Laidui is due to improper position."

—— "Book of Changes · Dui"

【Interpretation】

"Dui" hexagram six and three line said: deliberately to please people, dangerous.

"Xiang Ci" said: "To please you intentionally can bring certain dangers, because his attitude is not correct and his purpose is not pure."

Being a person sometimes has to please others, and the purpose is to ask for something.Deliberately trying to please the other party is to get the other party's help.If it is a good purpose, there is nothing wrong with it, but we must be vigilant against those treacherous villains.The characteristics of villains are flattery, unprincipled flattery and curry favor with others, they only recognize power and money, which dooms them to interact with others with their own ugly goals.

People have independent dignity, thoughts and interests, and unprincipled accommodation and obedience to others shows that he must have a certain purpose.Moreover, the villain will usually turn his face and deny others after gaining benefits, and finally make you a complete individual.

As the saying goes: "Beware of others", especially those who try to please you.Because such people have some ulterior motives, they must be treated with special care.

【Category】

Story [-]: Li Ji hides a knife in her smile
During the Spring and Autumn Period, Duke Xian of Jin was bewitched by Li Ji. He wanted to make Xi Qi, Li Ji's son, the crown prince, and told Li Ji about his intention.She looked very happy on the surface, but she was thinking in her heart: Jin Xiangong has made Shen Sheng the prince, and the prince has a very friendly relationship with the other two brothers Chonger and Yiwu.Changing the prince for no reason, fearing that the officials will not accept it, not only will his son not be the prince, but he may even be persecuted.So Li Ji acted upright on the surface, but secretly she was thinking about how to frame the Shen Sheng brothers and seize the crown prince.

One day, Li Ji said to Jin Xiangong: "Shen Sheng has been in Quwo for several years, and I miss him a lot, so please invite him back." If so, he sent someone to tell the prince to come back immediately.Shen Sheng is also a well-educated and dutiful son. He came back to visit his father and went to the palace to meet Li Ji.Li Ji hosted a banquet and served wine, and the conversation was very pleasant.

On the third day, Shen Sheng entered the palace to thank him, and Li Ji left him for dinner.

Unexpectedly, she ran to Lord Xian that night and cried and said that Shen Sheng had molested her, and Duke Xian of Jin became angry when he heard that.The next day, Li Ji called Shensheng into the palace again, took him to the garden to see flowers, and asked Shensheng to help her drive away the bees flying around her head.Shen Sheng didn't know what to do, and obeyed the order, waving his sleeves above her head.

Duke Xian of Jin could see this scene clearly from upstairs.He was so angry that he immediately ordered someone to push Shen Sheng out and behead him. Shen Sheng was so frightened that he was sweating coldly, not knowing why.Li Ji knelt in front of Duke Xian of Jin again and said, "You just need to understand the truth, and you must not execute him, because I called him back. If you kill him, the officials will definitely say that I did it. What's more, this is a family matter." , it doesn’t sound good to spread the word. You’d better spare him!”

Jin Xiangong had no choice but to drive Shen Sheng back to Quwo, and sent people to follow him and monitor his actions.Li Ji sent someone to say to Shen Sheng: "I had a dream. I dreamed that Qi Jiang was crying to me, saying that she was starving and freezing in the underworld. She was very desolate. Your son should sacrifice to her."

Shen Sheng is a dutiful son, so he is naturally obedient.After worshiping, as usual, he gave the meat and wine to his father, Duke Xian of Jin, to fulfill the gift of a son of man.A few days later, when Jin Xiangong came back from hunting, Li Ji had already poisoned the wine and meat and gave it to Jin Xiangong, telling him: "I once dreamed that Qi Jiang was suffering in the underworld. , please try it!"

Jin Xiangong picked up the wine and was about to drink it, but Li Ji said, "The wine and meat are imported, so don't be careless, just try it!" Jin Xiangong poured the wine on the ground, and white smoke rose from the ground.Li Ji cut another piece of meat for the dog to eat, and the dog died immediately.Jin Xiangong was furious, and immediately promoted to the palace, counting Shen Sheng's crimes.And sent a large number of troops to kill Ben Quwo.After Shen Sheng heard the news, he didn't listen to the advice of his ministers, neither supported soldiers to resist, nor fled to other places, and finally hanged himself to death.Then, Li Ji repeated the old trick, inflicting misfortune on Chonger and Yiwu, forcing them to flee elsewhere.In this way, Li Ji pushed her son Xi Qi to the throne of Prince Jin through despicable tricks.

Li Ji's tricks are naturally sinister and vicious, but the reason why Shen Sheng suffers is because he is too honest and lacks guard against Li Ji, which leads to his own tragic results.

Story Two: The Death of Duke Huan of Qi

During the Spring and Autumn Period, Shu Diao entered the palace to serve Duke Huan of Qi when he was young, and he was deeply favored by Duke Huan of Qi.By Huan Gong's side, he carefully observed Huan Gong's living habits and inner activities everywhere, and soon got a clear picture of Huan Gong's various hobbies.So he did what he liked, and Duke Huan was very satisfied with him in speaking and doing things.Duke Huan often praised Shu Diao in front of everyone, and he became an indispensable figure in Duke Huan's daily life.

Shu Diao was well aware of Duke Huan's two hobbies: one was fond of delicious food and strange flavors; the other was fond of female sex.Therefore, Shu Diao focused on these two aspects.There was a man named Yi Ya in the palace, who was treacherous but good at cooking, so Shu Diao managed to make friends with him.

One day, Shu Diao recommended Yi Ya to Duke Huan. Hearing that he was good at cooking, Duke Huan asked Yi Ya, "I am tired of eating birds, beasts, insects, and fish in the world, but I have never eaten human flesh. I don't know how to eat human flesh." How does it taste?" This was originally a joke made by Duke Huan, but the speaker had no intentions, but the listener meant it, so Yi Ya kept it in his heart, and when he returned home, he cooked his son to death.

At lunch a few days later, Duke Huan ate a dish that was as tender as a suckling sheep and extremely delicious, which he had never eaten before.When Duke Huan knew that it was the flesh of Yi Ya's son, although he felt disgusted in his heart, he also felt that Yi Ya killed the son to satisfy himself, which shows that he loves me more than his own flesh and blood.After that, Duke Huan not only favored Yi Ya even more, but also favored Yi Ya more.

When Guan Zhong was critically ill, Duke Huan of Qi went to visit him and asked, "Father Zhong is ill, can you tell me anything?" Guan Zhong knew that he would die soon, so he said to Duke Huan of Qi, "I hope you leave Yi Ya, Shu Diao, Chang Zhiwu, Young Master Wei and others should stay far away, don't get too close to them."

After hearing this, Duke Huan of Qi couldn't understand and said: "Yi Ya used his own son's flesh to honor me, which shows that he loves me more than his son. Isn't such a person worthy of trust?" Guan Zhong said: " There is no one who does not love his son, if he can be so cruel to his own son, how can he be kind to his master?"

Duke Huan of Qi went on to say: "Shu Diao castrates himself to serve me, which shows that he loves me more than himself. Is there any need to doubt this?" , it will not be any better for the monarch.”

Duke Huan of Qi also said: "Chang Zhiwu can cure my stubborn illness, can't he believe it?" Witch to maintain his health, so he can do whatever he wants!"

Duke Huan of Qi said: "Young Master Wei has served me for 15 years. For me, he didn't go back to the funeral even after his father died. This shows that he loves me more than his own parents. Shouldn't such a person be trusted?" Guan Zhong said: " There is nothing closest to a person than his parents, and if he is so ruthless to his parents, let alone to other people!"

After hearing what he said, Duke Huan of Qi thought it was very reasonable: "Okay, everything will be done as you say." After Guan Zhong died, Duke Huan of Qi expelled these four people.But after three years, Duke Huan felt that Zhongfu's words were too much!These four people are beneficial but not harmful to the country, so they were recalled to the court.

The next year, Duke Huan fell ill, and Chang Zhiwu used his witchcraft to spread a rumor, saying, "Duke Huan will die someday." Yi Ya, Shu Diao, and Chang Zhiwu conspired to cause trouble.They blocked the gate of Duke Huan's palace, and no one was allowed to enter. They built a three-foot-high wall outside the palace, cut off his food, and planned to starve him to death.

When Duke Huan of Qi was about to die, he sighed: "Oh! I got into such a fate today. I was confused and didn't listen to Zhongfu's words. Zhongfu is really a saint, and a saint's vision is far away!"

If you like other people's flattery and unprincipled acceptance of flattery and fawning, you will neglect to guard against such people consciously, and you will be harmed by them sooner or later.

Story [-]: Lu Huiqing is good at using "soft knives"

Wang Anshi regarded Lu Huiqing as his most capable assistant and closest friend during the reform process, and repeatedly recommended and reused him to Emperor Shenzong.No matter how big or small the reforms were, they were all discussed with Lu Huiqing before they were implemented. The specific content of all the reforms was based on Wang Anshi's ideas, and Lu Huiqing wrote the implementation rules before handing them over to the court for implementation.

At that time, the reform encountered great resistance, and despite the support of Shenzong, it still had little effect.Under such circumstances, Wang Anshi wishfully regarded Lu Huiqing as his main assistant in carrying out the reform, a companion who could share joys and sorrows and adversity.

However, Lu Huiqing's purpose of currying favor with Wang Anshi was not to carry out reforms, but to have his own small calculations. He wanted to gain benefits for himself through reforms.Regarding this point, some far-sighted and far-sighted ministers at that time had already seen him very clearly.

Sima Guang once said to Song Shenzong: "Lu Huiqing is not a talent. In the future, Wang Anshi's reform will be opposed by the people of the world. It must be Lu Huiqing!" He also said: "Wang Anshi is indeed a sage. However, he should not completely trust Lu Huiqing. He is a treacherous person from all over the world. He advises Wang Anshi and makes people in the world regard Wang Anshi as a treacherous person."

Later, Sima Guang left the imperial court under Lu Huiqing's ostracism. Before leaving Beijing, he wrote to Wang Anshi several times in a row, reminding him: "Little flatterers like Lu Huiqing are now attached to you. The capital to climb up. When you are in power, they will naturally obey you. Once you lose power, they will definitely betray you."

But Wang Anshi has completely regarded Lu Huiqing as a like-minded partner in the reform. Even when Lu Huiqing was secretly playing tricks and he was forced to resign as prime minister, he still felt that Lu Huiqing was as loyal to him as a son is to his father, so he strongly recommended Lu Huiqing as the deputy. The post of prime minister.

When Wang Anshi lost power, Lu Huiqing's true nature was exposed. He not only betrayed Wang Anshi, but also attacked and persecuted Wang Anshi in order to gain the position of prime minister. The spearhead was directed at Wang Anshi.

When Wang Anshi regarded him as his right-hand man, he had nothing to say to him.Once when discussing a political matter, because he had not made a final decision, he wrote to Lu Huiqing: "Don't let the emperor know about this matter in advance." At this time, Lu Huiqing handed the letter to the emperor and told him Wang Anshi committed the crime of deceiving the emperor, and he wanted to use the power of the emperor to get rid of his confidant's serious troubles.

Although in the end Song Shenzong still cared about Wang Anshi's old feelings and did not pursue his crime of "deceiving the emperor", but after all, he had been stabbed by Lu Huiqing's "soft knife".

【The Heart of the Book of Changes】

In the process of interpersonal communication, especially in the field of power, there is no shortage of such people.When you gain power, he compliments you and follows you, as if willing to go through fire and water for you.At the same time, it is secretly spying on you, calculating you, searching for your gaffes and deeds, as a secret weapon to hit you and frame you one day.You can guard against an open opponent. An opponent who appears as a confidant like this is really hard to guard against.

In this world, we are often hurt by others.Someone takes advantage of our kindness and betrays us.So, beware that those who please you will bring you danger.In fact, ordinary people are the same, no matter how nice they say to you, it doesn't necessarily mean that they are sincerely doing your best.This was the result of only seeing what was in front of me at that time, lacking precautions and not realizing that the danger was approaching.

If you and someone are just friends in the ordinary sense, although you have eaten together, there is no friendship; Such a person suddenly becomes enthusiastic about you, then you should be alert, because this kind of behavior indicates that he may have plans for you.

When encountering a friendship whose temperature suddenly rises, only by being calm and keeping a proper distance will you not get burned.To analyze whether this kind of "friendship" contains the meaning of "attempt", the first thing is to examine your current situation, do you have resources?If it is, then this person may have plans for you and wants to get some benefits through you; if you have no power or power, but have money, then this person may also borrow money from you, or even cheat money; if you No power, no power and no money, there is nothing for others to ask for. Maybe they want to use you to help him do something, or focus on your relatives, friends, and family members, and you are just what he wants when he crosses the river. A stepping stone.

For those who abuse themselves to please you, the best way to deal with it is to ignore it; for the phenomenon of dog jumping over the wall caused by ignoring it, the best attitude is to laugh it off.Self-respect, self-respect, self-love and self-improvement will make you grow nobler!
(End of this chapter)