Because I love you

Chapter 20 Ending
The old chemistry class also leaned on the railing and looked up at the stars in the sky, "Li Xiaoxian, since the first time I noticed you, you have been giving me very unexpected actions. It seems that Li Li framed you. You forgave Li Li so easily. I thought you would never get in touch with Li Li, or you would frame Li Li too, but you resolved this matter with a very unexpected gesture. You said, Should I pay attention to you, or feel that you are a good person?"

"Actually, before Ono arrived, I already knew the reason for Ono's fight this time. It was because that boy insulted you. When you sent Ono here just now, I knew you knew the reason. But you Look, you solved it very well, the boy shook your hand, which means that it must be fine. It only takes a few minutes, and you can do this. It seems that you are still full of charisma. "

Li Xiaoxian pointed at the old chemistry class with a smile, and the old chemistry class turned around and looked into the classroom suspiciously.

The boy strode into the classroom and took a deep breath, "Ono, stand up!"

Ono was stunned and looked at the boy inexplicably, "What do you want to do?"

The boy strode up to Xiaoye, looked at Xiaoye angrily, and suddenly bent down and bowed at ninety degrees, "Xiaoye, what happened today is my fault, please forgive me."

Ono was startled, and looked at the boy depressedly, "Are you okay?"

"I am fine."

The boy looked at Ono sincerely, "Will you forgive me?"

Ono also stood up and hugged the boy, "I didn't blame you at all."

The boy and Ono looked at each other and smiled, which seemed to settle their suspicions.

Li Xiaoxian spread his hands and looked at the old chemistry class with a smile, "Look, are you satisfied with this ending?"

The old chemistry class smiled speechlessly, "Should I say you are, clever and weird?"

"Whatever, I don't care."

Li Xiaoxian laughed a few times, "I'm going back to my class. Also, if my head teacher asks me later, I'll just say I'm with you. Please help me cover it up."

The old chemistry class helplessly looked at Li Xiaoxian's back running away and smiled secretly, really surprising himself every time.

Zhao Jing suddenly stood up from the stool with a pen in hand, "Li Xiaoxian hasn't come over for evening self-study until now, Kong Yang, has she asked for leave from her old class?" The whole class was startled, and looked up at Zhao Jing.

Kong Yang looked at Zhao Jing suspiciously, "I haven't heard about Li Xiaoxian asking for leave."

Zhao Jing frowned anxiously, "What's going on? Li Xiaoxian hasn't come here until now, did something happen?"

Zhu Wu frowned and stood up with Zhao Jing, "Why didn't Li Xiaoxian come to class? She's never been like this, could something be wrong?"

Zhao Jing looked at Zhu Wu nervously, "You are right, so shall we go out and look for it?"

Zhu Wu calmly raised his hand to stop Zhao Jing, "Let's first analyze where Li Xiaoxian is now."

Zhao Jing shook her head, "She always likes to encounter injustice, and I don't know if something happened to her again."

Kong Yang tapped with a pen, "Then think about it carefully."

Li Xiaoxian pushed open the door very tiredly and walked in. Seeing all the classmates looking at him, he looked at the classmates in a daze, but he didn't know what happened, so he looked at the classmates suspiciously, and went back. to your seat.

"Where have you been?" Zhu Wu asked first, looking at Li Xiaoxian angrily.

"Lao Ban has come?" Li Xiaoxian looked at Zhu Wu in confusion.

Zhu Wu shook his head, "Old Ban has never been here, but you have never been late like this, so we are worried."

"It's good that you're fine." Zhao Jing was still calm.

"I was with my chemistry teacher and asked some questions, that's all."

Li Xiaoxian replied calmly.

Zhu Wu pouted, "Then you don't say anything, do you know how many people are worried about you!?" Zhu Wu was very angry.

Li Xiaoxian snorted coldly, "It's just you guys, it doesn't matter, I still get lost in this school, I think I'm a kid."

Zhu Wu cut out, "What do you think, you are just a child."

Li Xiaoxian looked at Zhu Wu speechlessly, why sometimes he felt that Zhu Wu was very childish.

The school is actually a very gossip place, but Li Xiaoxian's story is known to many people in a flash, and sometimes it may spread much faster than the entertainment circle.

Li Xiaoxian just smiled when he heard it, if it wasn't for this, he might not have known Brother Cui, his peer in junior high school is now the gang leader.

Li Xiaoxian thought, maybe he knows some people who are black and white.With Brother Cui, there would be a lot.

When Zhu Wu looked at Li Xiaoxian, he suddenly realized that Li Xiaoxian's charm is infinite, even such a thing can be done, and it can also come out with a perfect ending. Others are different.

Zhu Wu didn't know whether this was good or bad, but every time he could save the day at the last moment, there was nothing wrong with it.

Now Zhu Wu admires Li Xiaoxian a little in his heart.

Thanks to Li Xiaoxian's efforts, the little college entrance examination actually passed, but Li Xiaoxian didn't feel any different other than being relieved.

It's just that I will learn four less subjects in the future. The change in the curriculum made everyone feel relieved and less nervous than before.This black April has passed so easily.

Li Xiaoxian thought that by this time next year, he might be even more nervous, but now he can indeed relax a little bit.Without the embellishment of science subjects, Li Xiaoxian felt that he had completely broken with science and would never see each other again. He felt a little lonely and reluctant.Although I have prepared for it long ago, it is still so difficult to accept it all at once.

Never seeing the science teacher again, and not having to look at the science test papers, Li Xiaoxian smiled with a hint of bitterness on his lips.

Zhu Wu looked at Li Xiaoxian who was wearing a bitter smile beside him, suddenly he didn't know what Li Xiaoxian was thinking, now he clearly felt that he should be happy, but Li Xiaoxian's expression showed reluctance.

Zhu Wu had never seen Li Xiaoxian sad, but seeing Li Xiaoxian now, he felt distressed for no reason.

Zhao Jing didn't seem to be affected at all, she still looked at the textbook very carefully without saying a word.Compared to Li Xiaoxian's uneasiness, he was much more stable.

Seeing everyone relaxed, the old class didn't say much or stop anything, just stood on the podium and smiled, "The school decided to hold the sports meeting next week. This year, because of the small college entrance examination, it is much delayed than before. It's just right After the junior college entrance examination, everyone can relax for a few days. But you still have to study hard when you come back."

Another sports meeting.

Thinking of the last sports meeting, Li Xiaoxian's mouth raised to reveal a trace of memory, it was really fun at that time, but it felt like too much time had passed before there was a second chance.Or, in fact, time has always been so fast, it's just that Li Xiaoxian didn't feel it, it's already this time.Li Xiaoxian felt a little surprised.

Lu Xin's class was also talking about the sports meeting. Lu Xin just thought that the junior college entrance examination was over, and Li Xiaoxian would not need to give her lectures by herself in the future, so she was a little sad.

Fortunately, Yu'er and Li Xiaoxian are good friends, so it shouldn't be a problem for Lu Xin to think of a way to get close to Li Xiaoxian.At this sports meeting, Lu Xin thought that he should be able to see Li Xiaoxian.

On the day of the sports meeting, Li Xiaoxian and Xue Mian sat together, not at all energetic, just holding the Walkman and listening to music, the two chatted and listened to the music, but they didn't have any energy to watch the sports meeting that everyone was watching.Li Xiaoxian felt that all his strength was taken away in an instant, and now he didn't want to think about anything.

Li Xiaoxian's class happened to be sitting with Yu'er's class, and Yu'er was quietly reading extracurricular books there. When Li Xiaoxian was bored, he also raised his head to look at Yu'er, and then talked with Yu'er and Xue Mian. The three of them were very happy. Sitting low-key at the back, there was no movement.

Lu Xin also sits at the end with a book and reads, but because of the sitting position, she can only see Li Xiaoxian's profile.

Li Xiaoxian was lying on Xue Mian's body with a trace of fatigue and wanted to sleep, but Xue Mian didn't mean to be tired, maybe it was because he had really rested after two days of rest.Li Xiaoxian felt that he was really tired, and he would never see some people again.

Even before graduation, Li Xiaoxian already felt the atmosphere of graduation.

Since ancient times, Li Xiaoxian feels that there is a very strong parting atmosphere surrounding him. He does not want to part but must have a big heart, comforting himself that there is no banquet that will never end.

It's just this lingering banquet, why is it at this time.

On the day of graduation, Li Xiaoxian was blocked by Zhu Wu at the stairs. At that time, it was very chaotic, and the students were all carrying their things and preparing to go home.There is no need to come here in the future, but Li Xiaoxian no longer had the sad thoughts at the beginning, and just looked at Zhu Wu quietly.

Maybe after Zhu Wu finished speaking, he walked out of this school, and everything in high school was over.

Zhu Wu smiled wryly, and leaned against the wall, "Li Xiaoxian, actually I don't know why, but I still like you very much. After I confessed to you in the second year of high school, I forced myself to discover your shortcomings and your shortcomings for a long time. Not good, but all I think about is your cuteness and your goodness. Li Xiaoxian, what do you think I should do? Is it true that after graduating from high school, I will give up on you in the future?"

Li Xiaoxian looked at Zhu Wu's appearance, raised his head expressionlessly and sighed, and also leaned against the wall, closing his eyes to rest.

"I don't even remember when I fell in love with you, maybe it started when I was in the same class as you in the second year of high school, or earlier, when I didn't even care about it, and then I fell in love with you gone."

Zhu Wu looked at Li Xiaoxian seriously, "But tell me, what should I do? You have always been so capable, can you give me a trick this time? When I first saw you, it was when?"

Zhu Wu carefully recalled, "By the way, it was when I was in the second year of junior high school. The winter didn't seem very cold, but the school actually asked us to go for a run every time we exercised between classes. That was the first time I knew you. People, because you happily ran in front of your class with flags, singing 'The king wants me to patrol the mountains' while running."

"Later, all the students in your class sang along with you. The result? Everyone who hated running at first began to happily sing along behind your class, 'The king wants me to patrol the mountains'."

"I'm surprised that the school didn't stop this move, and laughed to see us running around like this. So in my heart, you are like an angel, because you can always do this and save yourself from danger. I thought After that time, I was the only one who would like you, and then I pretended to mention you to my colleague unintentionally, but he actually knew about it, so I found out that your name is Li Xiaoxian."

"My class is actually not far from yours. Every time I go to practice, I like to stand there and wait for you to come out. That time I followed you and watched you walk hand in hand with a girl. It seems that there is something happy, you said it very happily. But a girl behind you actually stretched out her hand to push you back. I was surprised at the time, but before I could react, you fell down."

"Do you know, I saw with my own eyes that you let go of your companion's hand, and then fell down by yourself. I was worried that something would happen to you on such a high floor at that time. But I didn't expect that you just patted the dust on your legs Then stood up, as if nothing happened. But your companion pulled you nervously, asking if you have anything to do."

"What I thought at the time was, isn't this girl's brain broken? Why didn't she turn around to see who was retreating from her, and didn't make any unnecessary moves, just dragged her companion away. I would rather be myself I got it wrong, but the real you is right in front of me. Maybe it was that time that made me like you even more."

"Actually, you won't hide your temper. Every time you get really angry, you will quarrel with others fiercely. But after the quarrel, you will find a way to solve it, instead of choosing to stay out of touch. The result is People who don't know each other, and have had conflicts with you, are actually the ones who get along with you best in the end."

"I really can't help but admire you. It's just that when I was in the third grade of junior high school, I never saw you again. I asked other people to find out that you transferred. No one knew the specific reason. In fact, you There is nothing wrong with that sentence, that is, there is not necessarily a reason for doing everything, as long as you want to do it, then do it.”

"I think there may be no reason for you to transfer schools at that time. But I also understand in my heart that I'm afraid I will never see you again. It's a cruel thing, I don't want to accept it, and I can only accept it myself .”

"During military training in high school, you were punished by the instructor to turn left and right. I saw you there, but I was not sure if it was you, because I haven't seen each other for too long, let alone so far away, even if it is A person who I have been thinking about all the time will also become unfamiliar. It was not until the last day of military training that you went to the opposite company to sing on La Shenwen, and I was sure that person was you."

"Actually, it's right to think about it. Who would do such a thing except you. I didn't think of it at the beginning. I asked which class you were in, and thought about how I could meet you by chance. Although everyone said I was The school's school grass, but I also know that this is of no use to you at all, and you won't even notice."

"It's just that your story spread very quickly. I soon found out about Li Li's framing of you. When I heard it, I was very angry and wanted to teach that Li Li a lesson. I think you, a girl, must have been framed like this. I'm also very upset, and maybe I will retaliate against Li Li. It's a pity that the news I got in the end is that you didn't take it to heart at all, and this matter is just an episode of yours that won't have any effect."

"You didn't do anything to Li Li, and you didn't blame her. You even forgave Li Li. I was shocked at the time, thinking how could there be such a girl. Or, does this girl have no brains at all? Thinking about it so much. It's strange, maybe I don't know you too well."

Zhu Wu closed his eyes and smiled softly, "But I really like you, and I was thinking of how to let you know me. Later, when I was in the same class as you, I was so surprised that I couldn't wait to go over and tell you, What is my name? In fact, the subconscious meaning is just to let you know that there will be someone like me in this class from now on."

"Sure enough, you don't know me. I've liked you for so long, but you still don't know me. For three years, from the second year of junior high school to the second year of high school, three years can change everything. But I still like you. I feel I'm really going crazy."

Zhu Wu held his head, a little at a loss.

Li Xiaoxian folded his arms and looked at Zhu Wu quietly, "Zhu Wu, may I tell you, maybe I am a late bloomer in my heart, and now I still treat every boy as a buddy, I can't tell the difference between men and women, and I have no love. Please don't I thought this was my excuse."

After Li Xiaoxian got the admission notice after graduation, he started to play around with his hands and feet, and went to almost every place, and in Li Xiaoxian's opinion, every city was nothing more than that.It seems that she has never been so relaxed, and Li Xiaoxian's heart has also relaxed, at least she doesn't have to bother looking at anything so much anymore.

During such a long time, Li Xiaoxian would occasionally think about the three years of high school, as if he was dreaming, everything had passed.

Chen Kai and Zhu Wu were no longer so clear in Li Xiaoxian's memory, but Li Xiaoxian clearly remembered that these two people had appeared in his life.

In my youth that year, I remember you coming.

Li Xiaoxian only returned to his home from Changzhou in August, it seemed that many things happened at that time, but Li Xiaoxian didn't take it to his heart at all.

It was only when Li Xiaoxian arrived at university with his bag on his back that he realized that everything was different. This time, he really wanted to start a new life. He had never experienced it before, but he needed to live on campus, and he needed to handle everything by himself.

In his sophomore year, Li Xiaoxian finally had his own QQ, and inexplicably added a lot of people, whether he knew him or not, they were all among Li Xiaoxian's friends. Li Xiaoxian couldn't bear to refuse people who added him as friends, so he just left it like this.

Everything happened naturally, Li Xiaoxian didn't even have the strength to think about it, and did everything according to his own thoughts.There are no parents here, so as long as Li Xiaoxian thinks about it, he will do it desperately.

Although he is full of passion and strength when doing things, Li Xiaoxian will always feel lonely when he is not.

Although I was very tired at that time, I was very fulfilled, and now I can't feel a trace of life when I am free.

Li Xiaoxian saw Lu Xin's message the moment he logged into his qq space message board, and it seemed that it was a long time ago.Li Xiaoxian opened the pages one by one with a blank expression, recalling many things at that time in his heart.

Xiaoxian, don't think that the first time I met you in the second year of high school was also the first time I met you.I have been here for a long time since I saw you, so long that I would think that there is something wrong with me.

The first time I saw you was actually during the military training. A few of us played songs together. I was originally unwilling to join in the fun, so I was reading quietly all the time. Suddenly you ran over and pulled up the person next to me. he sings.

When I looked up for a moment, I saw your bright and mischievous smile.Then I suddenly started to like you, just because of your smile, brilliant and otherworldly.Just because of your smile, I feel the sunshine.

At that time, it was when I grew up that I had feelings for girls for the first time, and liked a girl for the first time.

Since then, I have been noticing you. You were assigned to class seven, and I was on the third floor. Although we were upstairs and downstairs, we missed countless times because we didn't know each other.Occasionally, I only know your class when I go to the fourth floor, and then I know your naughtiness.

When we were assigned to the same floor, we were already in the second year of high school. It was a very busy day in the experimental class. Your classroom is on the east side and mine is on the west side.After going back and forth like this for a long time, I found out that your class, although everything has stairs, but because I wanted to see you more, I chose to walk a few more steps, taking the stairs on the east side every day.At that time, because I can see your smiling face like a flower every day, your sunshine.As a result, all the pressure of learning will be gone.

I decided to let you know that I bought chocolates on Valentine's Day, but I didn't know how to give them to you. I finally made a decision that it would be better to send them directly to you sitting at the window.

I mustered up a lot of courage to knock on the window and give you the chocolate, and then I didn't have the courage to speak anymore, so I had to pretend to be calm and walk away, but you actually held up the chocolate and said something. "

Why!If you don't tell me the girl's name, how can I deliver it for you!No more courage to say, that chocolate is for you.So, he had no choice but to run away.God knows how embarrassing I was when I escaped.

You are actually my friend at the same position. I know she likes me because she told her classmates, but because I have you in my heart, I have no choice but to pretend not to know.It’s just that I didn’t expect that you would appear in front of me like that, holding a book, and my colleague asked me to give you a physics topic. You have bright eyes, but you are so stupid. No matter what you say, you can’t say no.

You laughed and said you were stupid, and then you retorted that I didn't speak well.Smiling softly, I realized how smart you are. Yes, I did not speak well on purpose, just to keep you for a few more minutes.

Just want to see you some more time.A small thought, although you will not remember me because of it, it will also impress you when you talk about it in the future, and this is enough.

There was also the sports meeting at that time. In fact, you and her were sitting next to me. The sports meeting lasted for a day, and I watched you silently for a whole day, and I couldn't read the book in my hand at all.

But you, still smiling, are messing around with your classmates.Then, we discussed about the girls, the teacher's jokes, the usual things, and the "Legend of the Harem" that you watched at that time.

After laughing like this for a whole day, I thought, is it because you are very carefree in your heart, or because of something, you don’t feel tired after laughing all day.Suddenly, I wanted to wish you a happy life like this.Let you smile like a flower all your life.

Think about it carefully, no one has the heart to hurt an elf-like girl like you; if someone hurts you, I can only say, how could he have the heart.

You are right, since it is not suitable, you should accept others.But, Xiaoxian.

In fact, a person's heart is very small, and sometimes it is so small that it can only pretend to be another person. Even if the girl I liked has a boyfriend in the future, even if I already have a girlfriend that I like, I still don't have it. A way to forget the girl who once entered my heart.

Because you haven't loved any boy, maybe you won't understand this sentence.Don't know this feeling.Therefore, there will be no psychological harm.

Therefore, I have no way to let go, no way to accept others.

So, please stop trying to match me with her.

Actually, even without you, we wouldn't be together, because I don't love her.Just treat her as a classmate.If you like, we were already together in the second year of high school.

You only know that she has loved me for 4 years. You know, since the military training in the first year of high school, I have also loved you hard for more than 5 years.These, do you understand?

How could it be possible to let go of the love of more than 5 years?
Xiaoxian, what you said to me yesterday made me feel even more cute.I know you too well, and when you speak, you have naughty anxiety and embarrassment in your eyes, so I know that you are doing it on purpose.

Xiaoxian, I decided to study hard now.But you have to know that in today's society, it is still possible to leave after marriage, not to mention, you haven't, so I won't disturb, I will just wait silently, until you can discover my goodness.

Moreover, I can also say that in this life, no one will love you more than me. "

Li Xiaoxian burst into tears as she watched, Yu'er kept telling Li Xiaoxian that Lu Xin's heart was still not let go, because Lu Xin still liked that girl, every time Li Xiaoxian would comfort Yu'er well, and asked Yu'er not to be so sad.

At this moment, Li Xiaoxian suddenly understood that there was a boy who was always by his side and never left.

It’s just that Lu Xin’s appearance was always too late, so late that he could no longer like anyone, and the person who appeared late would be the person his good friend liked, so Li Xiaoxian had to try his best to pretend that he didn’t know at all .

When the real Lu Xin appeared, Li Xiaoxian watched at a loss, but couldn't do anything.

Without a heart of love, how can you accept anyone so easily.

The past time will never come back.

Wu Chengle and Li Xiaoxian sat together and didn't speak for a while.Li Xiaoxian's memories also ended here, many things may not be remembered anymore, so he had to talk about the things that impressed him intermittently.

"So your story is like this."

Wu Chengle looked at Li Xiaoxian, "It's just that your situation is much better than ours. At least, you are liked by others."

"Actually, I also want to like others, but I feel that I don't have any love in my heart. When I graduated from high school, I still didn't have the concept of boys and girls. I felt that everyone should be good friends. It's for you, I now It’s still someone who doesn’t think about liking.”

Li Xiaoxian raised his head, "At that time, I thought I liked him, but later he had a girlfriend, and I didn't feel it at all. Then I suddenly realized that I didn't like him at all. Xiaocheng, in fact, you You don't quite believe it, do you?"

"I believe."

Wu Chengle moved his hands a few times, trying to express something, "Actually, it's easy to understand. It's not easy to like someone. Many people think they like it, but in fact they don't like it at all. I understand."

"It may be as if you are like this now. Except for the person you liked, you can no longer like another one. It's not because you don't have a heart, but because the feeling disappears."

Li Xiaoxian stood up and moved around, "Do you think so?"

Wu Chengle nodded, "I agree with what you said."

Li Xiaoxian sighed, "Actually, Wu Chengle, who would say so clearly about feelings. Maybe I liked it too, but the feeling was not too strong, so I missed it like this. It's just that for me, when I think about it, I think about it. I will also smile, if you miss it, you will miss it.”

"However, I agree with others who say you are crazy, you are really too crazy."

Wu Chengle laughed and teased Li Xiaoxian.

Li Xiaoxian smiled, picked up the cup and drank water, "Wu Chengle, how many couples do you think we have in our school?"

Wu Chengle also put away his joke, "I'm afraid there are very few."

I took a notebook and a pen and walked to the school campus. The playground is the place with the most couples every day. I passed by every couple and every classmate. Each of them has a different story and sadness.The past or not yet, let go or not let go, there is a slight smile on the face.

What I don't really understand is why when I look at everyone, why everyone's faces are gentle and soft. In my eyes, no one seems to have a different expression.

I looked up at the sun in the sky, anywhere in the world, or yourself, or your side, is there another story unfolding at this time.You are the protagonist in that story, but in the other story, you are just a supporting role, doomed to suffer ruthless hurt and unwillingness.

Take advantage of others, or be used by others.

Because of a word of love, because of love, because I love you, so I have to endure everything, and I have to know whether that person exists, whether it is true love.

And now I finally understand why so many men always say, how old do I have to wait to get married, because I have been hurt deep down in my heart.

The kind of unforgettable, forever remembered injury.

This love song will eventually be separated, and the song will end.

Zou Yuxiang has always been unable to forget Mei, the girl with his first love, everything seems to be reasonable, until I forget everything, Zou Yuxiang suddenly sent me some photos, please let me develop these photos.I just thought that Zou Yuxiang wanted me to help develop their family photos at home, so I didn't care.

When I opened the compressed package of that email, I looked at the photos and burst into tears at that moment.

It never occurred to me that in the folder full, there were all photos of Zou Yuxiang and Mei together.

Play together, go to the street together, embrace together, face the sun together, and smile brightly.

It turns out that love is so hard to forget.

When she appeared, she was not so sad, she looked at me with a happy face, and told me that she met someone who loved her very much and treated her very well.Now they are about to get married.

I smiled at her smile and suddenly felt a very happy feeling.

When Li Le reappeared, it had been a long time since we had graduated. Li Le had found a job, but he still hadn’t solved the problem. When I asked about girls, Li Le just said that he might still think about getting married when he was in his 30s. thing.I looked at Li Le's appearance, and it turns out that once love appears, it will not change after a long time, and fall in love with other people.

Unless he didn't really love at that time!
When talking on the phone with Wu Chengle, Wu Chengle's voice was a little hoarse, with a helpless tone, she promised to be good friends with me, in fact, she looks very good like this.

It's hard for me to understand what Wu Chengle means when he says "very good". A girl I like has become someone who can only be friends. There is no way to develop further. I can only look at each other from a distance. How can it be very good? .

Or it's just because my concept and Wu Chengle's are too far apart.

When Lu Xin called me, he was indifferent but slightly sad, without any fluctuation in tone, just a sentence, "I'm getting married, the girl is the favorite of the family."

I hold the phone, this is the best ending.

Neither Yu'er nor I should have anything to do with Lu Xin anymore.

You want to be happy.

Everyone has a grave in his heart, where the widow is buried.

(Finish)

(End of this chapter)