Such stars and such moons: Qian Zhongshu and Yang Jiang's unparalleled love

Chapter 15 Facing life directly: the tension between dream and reality (2)
When he described Miss Bao's sexy and cool clothes, he wrote from the side: "Those male students got angry when they saw it, quarreling, talking and laughing behind Miss Bao's back. Some people called her "deli meat shop" because only Delicatessen would put on display the many warm-colored meats; and some called her "Truth," because "Truth" was said to be naked."
According to statistics, there are more than 700 metaphors in the book "The Besieged City", all of which are classic and unconventional. His language is humorous, vigilant, and thought-provoking.

He wrote a piece of diploma for studying abroad, "it seems to have the function of the leaf on the lower body of Adam and Eve, which can cover up the embarrassment and embarrassment." China's only victory since it had diplomacy or business agreement", and when he wrote that the Japanese army invaded China, "after that, the planes visited one after another, with the demeanor of a peerless beauty who once visited the city and then the country".

Those who surround the city try to escape,
People from outside the city want to rush in.

Be it marriage or career,

Most of the wishes in life are like this.

This is the intention of besieging the city outlined by Qian Zhongshu.From marriage to everything in life, seemingly immutable things are actually constantly changing in conflicts. Love or not, like or hate, is just a matter of thought.

This is "Fortress Besieged", and this is Qian Zhongshu's wisdom.Xia Zhiqing said: "Fortress Besieged is the most interesting and carefully managed novel in modern Chinese literature, and it may also be the greatest one... Its comic atmosphere and sense of tragedy, we can say with certainty that it is the most important novel for the future era. For Chinese readers, this will be their favorite work among Republican-era novels."
In February [-], "Fortress Besieged" came into the public's attention and began to be serialized in "Renaissance" magazine. It aroused great repercussions in Shanghai, an isolated island after the Japanese occupation.

In May [-], Shanghai Chenguang Publishing Company published the booklet "Fortress Besieged", which became a bestseller for a while, and was reprinted in September [-] and March [-] respectively.

Life is inevitably ups and downs, but the book is like a person. Mr. Qian Zhongshu's life can be described as ups and downs. The same is true for "Fortress Besieged", which was once greatly neglected in the literary and artistic circles during the liberation period, but after the dark willows and bright flowers, it bloomed with dazzling brilliance.

It's just that everything is something for later. Those who understand will appreciate Qian Zhongshu's wise and humorous.

The inevitable loss in life
One leaf falls to know autumn, and one curtain of rain to cherish people.How many brocade words have been written full of parting sorrows, how many shallow chants and low-pitched songs, full of heartfelt narration in the world, there is always something lost in the world, and there is nothing we can do.

Indescribable lovesickness, can't make up for Lihentian, gloomy days, passing through the stuffy space, towards the cycle of seasons.Some people sigh, life is like a floating life, how many painful ordeals does life have to go through to become more sophisticated and brilliant?

When they lived in poverty in Shanghai, their lives were difficult and difficult, and their thoughts were painful and sad.A woman, she used her weak shoulders to shoulder the burden of the family, so that her husband could continue to write despite hardships.She is optimistic, has the deepest love and the broadest mind, to her parents, sisters, husband, and even all living beings.

It's just that the time is too thin and the fingers are too wide. She can give her feelings, but she can't give her eternal life.

When the isolated island fell, his father gave Qian Zhongshu the hours of teaching at Aurora University, so he could concentrate on writing books.He happily said to Yang Jiang: "I have already decided on the title of the book, and it is called "Shi Sao Ti Yun". Ah Ji, pass it on to you!"
Seeing his father's soaring expression, Yang Jiang's heart softened.It is her lifelong regret not to be able to take pleasure in her mother's knees.When she wept sadly through the cold coffin, when she saw the tearful eyes of her once stalwart father, she couldn't help but secretly swear that this lifelong regret could not be repeated on her father.

On the eve of the victory of the Anti-Japanese War, the vicious Japanese set up a "carpet bombing" posture in Shanghai. The father entrusted his younger sister, Abi, who was studying at the Aurora Women's Liberal Arts College, to Yang Jiang. My daughter went back to Suzhou for a short stay.

Before leaving, her father said to her: "Abi will be entrusted to you. I can rest assured that all of you are just Abi. However, she is about to graduate and will be able to support herself soon. The box of antiques The money, leave it to her for studying abroad in the future, what do you think?"
It doesn't matter if you leave, people in Shanghai are in a state of panic nowadays, and it's always good to avoid the limelight.But why, listening to her father's entrustment to see through the world, her heart panicked for no reason?

Time does not pity lovers, death always comes too easily.In 67, her father suffered a stroke in Suzhou and died suddenly at the age of [-].When her father died, Yang Jiang felt that all her happiness had been driven to the bottom of the cold valley. She thought of her mother, the sorrow that hurt to the bone marrow, just like this, making a comeback and turning against the current like a river.

It's still the same place, the gate, the courtyard, but I can't find the warm home I once had.She walked in in a panic, and the mahogany furniture in the hall had long since disappeared, only the empty hall and her father's cold coffin were shocking.

There was a white curtain in front of the coffin, and under the curtain hung the portrait of his father.Looking at the home without warmth, she wiped away her tears, and went to the kitchen to make a cup of thick Gaiwan tea as usual, and put it on the dilapidated small table that she found somewhere before her father's funeral.

In the midst of the dense tea fragrance, she finally couldn't bear her grief and burst into tears.This was the last cup of hot tea she offered to her father, but the tea was left to cool, and she would never see her father drinking tea comfortably.Two lines of tears wet the skirt of my clothes.The world was boundless, she sat on the threshold, and couldn't stop crying, and her siblings also ran over sadly, shedding a few ladles of tears.

Death is a fate that everyone cannot escape. Their beloved father just left like this, and this family completely collapsed like this.The dead are long gone, and the living are always in distress. They are all crying, crying that fate loves to play tricks, and crying that the dead are no longer there.

So many memories, so many melancholy.The past dragged on for no reason, scene after scene, and piles of piles, Yang Jiang suddenly remembered a joke-like conversation between her parents.

Mother said, "I died in your head."
My father quarreled and said, "I died in your head."
The mother thought for a while, and then said: "Let you die in my head, I die first, what should you do?"
The two people who are fighting can't compete with fate after all.Yang Jiang fell into memory, this conversation so far away was as clear as yesterday.

Before the condolences, someone came to help build the funeral shed.Seeing those people climbing up and down the ladders and circling the pillars with the balls of white cloth, she suddenly thought of her wedding day.The same people come and go, the same busyness, but at that time the red and green colored silk was tangled, and now it is the plain white curtain that stings the eyes.

It turned out that everything changed so quickly.She said sadly: "The alternation of ups and downs, that is, for a moment, I have seen it with my own eyes."
At some point, all the figures disappeared, leaving only the courtyard blank.The world is still, the legs are numb, only the hazy heat between the nose reminds time.She knew that her father was gone, how many times she stared at her in a dream, how many times her pillow was wet with tears, her father's figure gradually drifted away in the years of remembrance.

Funerals, condolences.Wreaths, weeping.From the old house in Suzhou to the cemetery in Lingyan Mountain, she wore sackcloth and filial piety, wishing she could sink into the dust.This is the loss that life must face, and it is also the heaviest loss in life──The father's soul is gone, and the heartbroken tears are on earth and in the sky!
The deceased has passed away, and the elegant and warm home of the past is buried in a pile of loess.She understands that "people have joys and sorrows", and also knows that "this matter is difficult to complete in ancient times", but why, the "Poetry and Style Rhyme" that her father promised her has disappeared. Could it be that even this last thought, God Also so stingy?

She said: "My father didn't have the concept of accumulating family property at all. The things outside the body, whether someone gains or loses, are not worth caring about. I am only sad that the "Poems and Styles" that my father promised to pass on to me have been searched and found nothing. Old manuscripts in small chunks."
Sitting among the piles of messy books and papers, she swallowed tears filled with dust, and searched carefully over and over again, but only found a bundle of old diaries.She sat cross-legged, trying to find clues from the latest diary, but found that her father had written "Ah X, give XX" on one page.

When she was in Shanghai, every time she sent something to her father, she just quietly put it in bottles and cans, and never said what it was, thinking that her father didn't know what it was.She was surprised, and was stunned for a while, it turned out that her father knew everything, but he just didn't say anything.

"I often wish to dream of my father, but I only dream of squatting next to his bedside table, picking up the bottles and jars inside... I dreamed again that I sent him back to Suzhou for the last time, and followed him at the station. Walking behind, watching the corner of his robe being tilted. My father's face and the manuscript of "Shi Sao Ti Yun" also disappeared without a trace." Yang Jiang said.

Xiao Zhai sat dryly, his thoughts flying with the quiet night.The road is long and the thoughts are endless. The most difficult thing in the world is to make up for emotional regrets.

According to her guess, the book "Shi Sao Ti Yun" was probably destroyed by her father's dissatisfaction.He once said that he still wanted to read a certain book but couldn't get it.Scholars who engage in research are always demanding perfection, and it is very possible to ruin it, but Yang Jiang feels very guilty about this.She said: "Father destroyed his own works, and our children are the ones to blame. If a person has limited energy and consumes too much for the growth and education of his children, he will not have enough time to write works that he is satisfied with."
When he was dying, his father once looked at several children and said, "I am not Don Quixote, I am just the good man Jijano." At that time, Yang Jiang didn't understand his father's deep meaning, and only thought that what his father wanted to say was "I Not Don Quixote, I'm just the author of "Poetry and Rhyme".

Later, when she read "Don Quixote", she couldn't help crying when she thought of her father's last words.Now, she can only murmur the heartfelt words for her father: "I am not Don Quixote, I am just your father."
She suddenly understood that it turned out that the most truly touching words in the world are the simplest words.Now, she just wants to say to her father: "I am just your daughter."
Sometimes, she would also say to her father in her dream: "Dad, if you were the same age as me, "Shi Sao Ti Yun" would definitely be written and published." Face said: "Do I just want to publish a few of my own works?"
After liberation, she also discussed with Zhong Shu, if her father was still alive, would he be a decadent bourgeoisie, or an enlightened person under socialism?A long time ago, her father said to her: "Ah Ji, look, China after the war is a Russian-speaking world." He guessed the beginning correctly, but not the end, and Yang Jiang jokingly said, "I don't know him How he will welcome the new China after the war, I think he will be proud and proud. However, people like my father will probably be beaten to death by the Red Guards."
That's all, that's all.This is the loss that must be faced in life, and it is also the pain that must be experienced. Perhaps, her parents have reunited at the other end of the world.The spring breeze blows slightly, blows the heart, let the dusty regrets come to fruition one by one in the dream, and let the warm past stay in the heart and flow in the dream.

She remembered her father's last entrustment—Abi.Several of their sisters and brothers have already married and established their own families, except for the youngest sister.Abi is her father's last concern in this world, and she must do her best to ensure her happiness and consummation.

(End of this chapter)