The last feng shui master

Chapter 113 Jade Corpse Bride
I was afraid that the jade corpse would kill the idiot with my hands, so I quickly blocked the jade corpse, clasping the jade corpse's hand tightly with both hands.As a result, the idiot hit my chest with both hands, and I didn't even have a hand to resist.The idiot thought he was grabbing the jade corpse, so he stretched out his hand and squeezed it a couple of times, only to spit all over my face...

"Grandma, I want... my wife..." the idiot began to cry.

"Outsiders, if you want my grandson to help you, give this girl to my grandson as his wife..." The wrinkled old lady sprinkled the last handful of rice to the seven black cats, and slowly stood up from the chair .

When the wrinkled old lady was talking, I took a look at the dilapidated houses. Many of them were made of wood, with mud bricks at the corners, and they brought a stupid grandson with them. It must be true that the grandson could not find his wife.

"Old lady, you can't make such a joke. If you can't do me a favor, let my cousin be your grandson's wife. It's not worth it." I was slobbered on my face, afraid that he would come forward again , pulling the jade corpse back, all the gifts in his hand rolled to the ground, seven oranges rolled far away on the ground.

Only then did he free his hands to wipe off the saliva on his face. He didn't know what he had eaten, and there was a sour taste in the saliva.

Seven black cats jumped on top of the orange and stood still.

"Hey, my grandson is an idiot, so is it possible that you are an idiot too? You pretend to agree, and I will lie to him again, that's all. Two idiots." The wrinkled old lady looked at the two of us with contempt.

I didn't expect that the wrinkled old lady would still take the funny route when she was old. I thought it was the strict route.

It seems that preconceptions are not good.

Xu Jun pulled me aside, and I was afraid that the jade corpse would pull me away: "Brother Xiao, why don't we agree first, after the matter is resolved, we see the psychic, and then take your girlfriend...your cousin with you." It’s fine if you don’t leave. Anyway, the old lady with wrinkled skin is just pretending..."

After Xu Jun finished speaking, he looked at me.

"Is there a handsome word written on my face, what's the use of looking at me?" I shrugged and said.I saw Xu Junyu's head, pointed to the jade corpse, "You can discuss it with her..."

Xu Jun suddenly realized and hurriedly discussed with Yushi: "Well, what do you think, just pretend, I will help you watch, if that Mr. idiot touches you, I will not be polite, I have to deal with him. If he is with you You sleep in the same room, we don't agree..."

Jade Corpse shook his head and looked at me, probably waiting for me to make up my mind.

But I can't sell the jade corpse, I'd better ask Xie Lingyu about it.

"How about it, have you thought about it? Give me a letter..." The wrinkled old lady was a little unhappy, and there was still no news after listening to us chattering for a long time.

"Old lady. If your grandson meets, he will kiss and grope. I dare not let my cousin get a fake marriage..." I told the truth.

The wrinkled old lady frowned, thinking of a way to get the best of both worlds. I just took the time to call Xie Lingyu and tell her about the dowry for the jade corpse to marry the idiot.

This Xu Jun waited on the side, neither picked up the gift in his hand nor put it down.

After hearing what I said, Xie Lingyu said that the whole matter was out of her control, and that she was not the guardian of the jade corpse. In the end, she laughed at me for relying on a woman to do something.After talking for a long time, I was so angry that I almost wanted to drop the phone on the ground. If it wasn't for the heartache to buy a phone and ask for money, I must have dropped it.

The wrinkled old lady seems to have figured out a way: "My grandson just sees that other people have wives, and he is jealous. I will say a few words to him, and then it will be fine."

The idiot stood there, staring blankly at Xie Lingyu. The saliva had flowed from his mouth to the ground, and it was almost a meter long. From a distance, he thought he was making jelly.One hand wants to grab the crotch...

"You idiot. After you married the girl, the Civil Affairs Bureau didn't issue a marriage certificate. You can only hold hands, and you can't do anything else. Otherwise, you'll be arrested and put in jail..." the wrinkled old lady said gently.

As soon as the idiot heard the word "sent in prison", he immediately held his head and looked very scared. He probably had eaten in prison and had never been cultivated in prison.

The idiot was afraid for a while, and asked again: "Then is it okay to kiss..."

The wrinkled old lady said firmly: "No. After a while we have money, and then go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to apply for a marriage certificate. Then you can do whatever you want."

I thought the old lady's nonsense was to lie to the three-year-old child, but the idiot really believed it. Looking at the jade corpse, he moved a lot.

Now that the old wrinkled-skinned lady has said all about this person, she will fulfill some grandson's long-cherished wish of having a wife. When the time comes, the jade corpse will leave with me, and then find a way to buy an inflatable doll for the idiot from the Internet. It cannot be said that I am not in place.

I indicated that I would discuss it with the jade corpse first.The wrinkled old lady nodded and looked at me with a smile: "Young people are very good at handling things!"

How can the jade corpse understand so much, I just act out of respect.

"Well... Cousin, why don't you try marrying a fool, but it's a fake marriage, I won't let you..." I tried to say to Yushi.

The jade corpse didn't respond, and I thought that maybe the jade corpse couldn't understand the two people who "married..." and then used "the bride..." and "married..." After hearing this, the jade corpse smiled and swirled two words. Dimples, but when I point my fingers at the nerd, she hides her foot on top of my five toes, making me howl in pain.

But I begged Jade Corpse to have important matters, and finally she seemed to understand my difficulties and agreed.

Seeing that I reached an agreement with the wrinkled old lady, the idiot stepped forward to kiss, and remembered the words about going to jail: "When we have money, we can get a marriage certificate..."

"Tomorrow at twelve o'clock, you come here. My grandson will take you there." After the wrinkled old lady finished speaking, let me wait for her. Regardless of the old lady's age, she still walks pretty tough. The story was told by Shangri-La The good mountains and rivers are moist.

When the wrinkled old lady went upstairs.The idiot then talked to the jade corpse: "What's your name? My name is idiot. You are so pretty and have a good figure."

Jade Corpse's IQ and EQ are actually only a child of a few years old, and they are judged entirely by preferences. She doesn't like idiots at all, so she turned her back and reached out to plug her ears.

The idiot kept talking.

After Lin Danan, the idiot is the second boy who fell in love with her after seeing the jade corpse.Actually, I wanted to say a man, but judging by his appearance, he was probably still a boy.I mean just the front.

The wrinkled old lady brought a wooden box down: "Here is a red wedding dress, come here at twelve o'clock tomorrow night. Remember to let your cousin wear the red wedding dress, remember to come at twelve o'clock... we will talk about things later .”

Xu Jun thanked him again and again, put the things up and left the red envelopes behind.

"Look at you, why are you so polite. Since I brought them, I will take them all... You must not be used to the food of our poor family, and the old lady will not let you eat..." The wrinkled old lady took the things Put it all away.

I went out with Yushi and Xu Jun.When Xiao Jianjian went out, she barked twice at the seven cats standing on top of the oranges.Ever since Xiaojian met the kitten He Qingling, it has seldom been rude to cats. What happened today?
I looked back and saw that the idiot was still standing inside the wooden door looking at us, and the weird picture pasted on the door appeared faintly, and then I saw clearly that one of them was holding a wooden pestle in his hand.

Out of the alley, I found that Xu Jun's clothes were completely soaked, and I asked him why.Xu Jun explained to me: "I study biology. In the wooden house just now, there was a faint sound of a snake... Judging from the faint sound, it seems to be a vicious snake..."

I laughed in my heart, if Xu Jun saw the snake hanging from Ruan Sanjia's ear, he would definitely sweat himself.

"You see, they are old and young and have no self-defense ability. Maybe the purpose of raising snakes is for self-defense, to guard against thieves and thieves coming in..." My explanation is reluctant.

Xu Jun smiled and said, "It's better to raise a wolfdog than a snake, if it runs out, it will hurt people..."

When Xu Jun said this, I also murmured.But since you are here to beg others to do something, you should not think about some privacy.Xu Jun heard that we were staying in the "Don't lie..." hotel, so he brought his wife and son to live there.

When the jade corpse came back, the emperor looked at me in displeasure, his eyes were vicious and wanted to eat me.Seeing her like that, I had a nasty thought in my heart, whether this jade corpse was a virgin or not, I couldn't help but look at her long legs.

I still didn't think about it any further, instead I slapped myself on the face, secretly cursing myself as a pervert, with no sense of justice, how can I be a feng shui master who catches ghosts.

Back at the Don’t Lie Hotel, Xie Lingyu woke up. I opened the wooden box, revealing a set of exquisitely crafted red wedding gowns. Every stitch and thread seemed to be handmade. In the past, it was estimated that only rich people could wear it.

The red wedding dress was so red that Xie Lingyu's face was also red.

Xie Lingyu touched the wedding dress repeatedly, looking at the jade corpse: "Wearing it on her is like wearing it on me. It's just a pity that the groom is not you. It's someone else, otherwise it might be a match made in heaven."

What Xie Lingyu said made me feel embarrassed, and it was not easy to interrupt her remembrance.He could only listen silently, the jade corpse had no idea what the red wedding dress meant, not even being a bride himself.

It happened that Xu Jun had completed the check-in procedures and came to find me. He probably came to ask me what I needed to prepare, because he heard that the psychic medium might not be in the town, or it might be in the Blue Moon Canyon. Buy some special equipment.

I asked Xie Lingyu to take good care of the jade corpse and go shopping with Xu Jun.Liu Yunxin eased her attitude towards me a little, but Xu Xiaokang who was beside her still looked at me fiercely.

I asked the boss of Dabao to ask where there are field equipment to buy.Dabao listed several shops for me, and told me which one had a good attitude and which one was dedicated to cheating people.I drove my motorcycle and took Xu Jun to a special small shop, but compared with the big cities of Dali and Kunming, the small shop is far behind, and many things cannot be bought.I reluctantly chose a jacket and hiking boots, and got some ropes, which I learned when Liu Jianguo took me.After shopping, I asked Xu Jun to take a taxi and go back.

As usual, I went around the vegetable market and pig farms, collected some animal excrement and brought it with me. The poop that Bai Yueming pulled last time was too heavy and I threw it away. It's a pity. I saw a house There are two pairs of underwear hanging on the front, and I also took them down.

"I heard that the wrinkled old lady is going to marry her grandson again..."

The two villagers rode bicycles and chatted while walking. After a few words, they hurriedly turned around and looked around. Seeing a black cat squatting on the wall, they immediately shut up and stopped talking.

Back at the inn, I just put away my collection.After talking to Xie Lingyu, I saw my cousin muttering to the side.She can't speak, but she has the most basic feelings. She trusts me fully, but I want to marry her to someone else.

(End of this chapter)