south wind into my arms

Chapter 45

On the 26th day of the twelfth lunar month, the south wind went to Binhai.

On the first floor of a small white building in the old city, there is a half-old plastic sign hanging at the door, with four large characters written on it: Fontesloh.

Such a name exudes a strong atmosphere of domestic [-]-line kitchenware brands.Actually not.It is a psychological counseling room.

Near the end of the year, there are not many psychological consultation rooms that are normally open. When Nanfeng searched online, he found that the evaluation of this consultation room was very good. He chatted briefly on the Internet, and the other party asked him to meet and talk today.

The interior decoration of the consulting room is mainly in light and elegant light green. The curtains are pulled down to isolate the connection between people and the outside world. Two light yellow lamps are on, and the light is soft, which makes people relax unconsciously.

The doctor on duty was surnamed Feng, with a long face, wearing glasses, and a gentle demeanor.After Nanfeng sat down, he briefly told him about the problems he was facing.

Generally, when encountering such a situation, Dr. Feng first ruled out the possibility of homosexuality.He asked Nanfeng a few questions, Nanfeng replied with a dark face, "I'm sure, I have no impulse towards men. I'm not gay."

"You're just as impulsive towards women, aren't you?"

"I..." He was silent for a while, "I probably have some."

Dr. Feng observed his facial expression carefully. Although he spoke vaguely, he did not lie.Dr. Feng said, "Okay, then I will give you a copy of the test questions first. The process of taking the test is also included in the consultation time, do you have any comments?"

"it is good."

There were so many problems in the test that Nanfeng suspected that they did it on purpose.

But he finished it patiently.

While reading the questionnaire, Dr. Feng said, "More and more people come to ask about this question now. Is love incompetent? Some people are because of narcissism, and some are because of low self-esteem. You... well, your question is a bit complicated. .”

Nan Feng remained calm, "What's wrong with me?"

Dr. Feng didn't answer. After reading the questionnaire, he tidied it up and put it aside, then asked Nanfeng: "Would you mind telling me about your childhood?"

Nan Feng replied, "My childhood was pretty good."

He shook his head, "Believe me, if your childhood was really good, you wouldn't be like this now."

Nanfeng pursed his lips and said nothing.

Dr. Feng said, "Since you come to me for consultation, please open your heart and tell the truth, otherwise I can't help you. Can you talk about your family first, your parents?"

Nan Feng lowered his eyes and said, "Both my parents came from a merchant family. Their marriage was ordered by their parents, um, it was an arranged marriage. On their wedding night, my mother didn't want to have sex with my father, but later they still ..."

He paused here.Dr. Feng summed it up accurately with one word: "Marital rape."

"Well," he nodded, under the soft light, his expression was a little indifferent.He continued, "That night, they conceived me."

"What happened later? How was the relationship between your parents?"

Nan Feng shook his head, "The relationship is very poor. They are like two strangers, living a seemingly incompatible life. My father soon had an affair and gave birth to an illegitimate daughter. Later, when I was 14 years old, they divorced."

"How did your parents treat you?"

"They created me to carry on the family line. In their eyes, I represent bad memories and failed marriages."

From his few words, Dr. Feng has heard the crux of the problem.He asked Nanfeng some more detailed questions. Nanfeng didn't speak much, but his language was concise and logical. The two chatted for more than half an hour. Doctor Feng finally said, "I probably understand your situation."

"so?"

"So, let me put it in a more general way. Many of the psychological problems we encounter as adults can find answers from our childhood experiences. For example, some perverted murderers, nine out of ten have suffered trauma in childhood. You have no ability to love , because you have lived in a cold and violent environment since you were a child. From infancy to childhood, you have not been able to get love from your parents-at least you think so in your consciousness. Therefore, at that time, your brain for Protecting yourself, shutting down the channel for love, it's a defense mechanism in psychology. It's like, if you don't get sugar you'll be sad, but when you tell yourself 'I don't need sugar at all', then you When faced with the situation of 'can't eat sugar', it will not be sad at all. In this hypothetical situation, it is completely valid to replace 'sugar' with 'love'. The human brain is amazing. When facing a similar dilemma, people will always choose the situation that is beneficial to them.”

Nanfeng nodded, he understood.

"Therefore," Dr. Feng made a conclusion, "you isolated love in childhood. If you don't expect it, there will be no harm."

"So, what should I do now?"

"You don't have to do anything."

"Huh?" He was a little uncertain.

Dr. Feng adjusted his glasses and explained, "It's like this, you haven't developed a disease. Besides, you have some problems in this aspect, and you are pretty healthy in other aspects. Well, the health here refers to mental health. You don't Need treatment, even if you want to, I tell you in a responsible manner, I am not sure to help you change the status quo, I can only try. Psychological problems that sprout in childhood often accompany people throughout their lives, and they cannot be cured in a lifetime. Change, this kind of problem is the most difficult to cure.”

"You mean, I can only die alone forever?"

"You can't say that. As long as you have no physical problems, you can still marry a wife and have children."

Nan Feng shook his head, "I won't marry someone I don't love and repeat the tragedy of my parents."

"That's it," Doctor Feng nodded and comforted him, "But don't give up hope. Besides, the chances of ordinary people finding true love are not high, just depends on luck."

Nanfeng didn't feel that he was comforted.

With a verdict of "I will die alone", Nan Feng calmly left the strangely named psychological clinic.The weather outside is not good, but the New Year is coming, and the festive atmosphere is strong on the streets. Some shops and houses have been hung with brightly colored lanterns. In the dusty winter, the red is dazzling.

He looked down at his watch and thought, Four more days.

Four days later, New Year's Eve.Nanfeng went to the provincial team to pick Lu Sheng back to celebrate the New Year.Lu Sheng didn't bring anything, just a backpack, which contained her personal items and a chicken soup book.

Their itinerary is very full today, they have to buy new clothes, buy new year's goods, put up Spring Festival couplets, and so on.When Lu Sheng was at home, he had to clean the windows during the Chinese New Year. Now, in Nanfeng's house, professionals do these things.

In addition, they also want to prepare their own New Year's Eve dinner.

The two went to buy new clothes first.The style of men's clothes is relatively simple. Nanfeng always buys clothes casually. Anyway, he is handsome and has a good figure, so no matter how he wears them, he will not look ugly.When buying clothes for Lu Sheng, he will become a little picky, choose one by one, and let her match it in a complete set. He likes to dress up his little girl beautifully. If the shopping guides gather around, they will not hesitate In other words, it was perfect.

But today Lu Sheng was a little uncooperative when buying clothes.Don't want this one, don't like that one, don't buy it or buy it.

Nanfeng asked, "Not in a good mood? Did you get bullied in the team?"

"No." She lowered her head and answered in a low voice, "These clothes are too expensive."

Nan Feng smiled and said, "We still have the money to buy clothes, don't worry."

"No." After entering the provincial team, she realized how much a tennis player costs.She is not financially independent yet, so she can't always waste money.So Lu Sheng shook his head resolutely, "I don't want it anymore, I haven't worn the one I bought last year!"

"The one I bought last year was old."

"no."

The voice was soft, and she was acting like a baby again.Really, she is becoming more and more coquettish.

Nanfeng had no choice but to compromise, "Okay, let's try this."

After changing clothes, Lu Sheng came out of the fitting room, stood in front of the full-length mirror and asked, "Does it look good?"

Nanfeng suddenly said, "Have you grown taller again?"

"Is there? I don't feel it."

"Turn around."

She turned around and found that he had come close, and she almost ran into his arms, and she blushed immediately.The two were so close, she seemed to be able to feel the clean breath around him.Her eyes fell on his Adam's apple, and there was an unspeakable throbbing in her heart, she wanted to kiss him very much.

Lu Sheng felt that there was probably a hooligan living in his body.

Nan Fengping raised his hand to touch the top of Lu Sheng's hair, and made a comparison on his chin. He always used this method to estimate her height.After measuring, he nodded and said, "It's a little high, go back and measure it later."

Lu Sheng blushed, fearing that Nanfeng would notice something unusual, she exaggeratedly unbuttoned her coat, "Oh, it's too hot here!"

Unbuttoning the coat, she was wearing a solid blue sweater inside. The sweater was very close-fitting, outlining the graceful and exquisite curves of her chest.Nan Feng's gaze hit this curve, and he immediately looked away.

Later, they went to the supermarket to buy new year's goods.Nanfeng pushed the shopping cart and asked Lu Sheng to choose. She threw whatever she liked into the shopping cart. When she walked through the food area, an employee was promoting hot pot base ingredients made by a famous hot pot restaurant brand.

Lu Sheng's eyes lit up, "Coach Nan, shall we have hot pot tonight?"

It was agreed to cook the New Year's Eve dinner together, but the combined cooking value of the two of them is close to zero, making hot pot is the best, and the failure rate is also zero.

The south wind naturally followed her.

There are many kinds of hot pot bases, and the salesman saw them pick and choose, so she took a bag of red packaging and handed it to Lu Sheng, "How about this latest tomato base? It is delicious and nourishes the skin, and it can whiten the skin. "The young employee saw that he was a newcomer, so he inadvertently emphasized the word "whitening".

Lu Sheng had a snack.Is she obviously dark...

Seeing Lu Sheng's silence, Nanfeng thought she liked this kind of bag better, so he said, "Take a bag."

"Okay sir, do you need anything else? This kind of spicy one is also good, it is the best seller here."

In the end, they took away a bag of tomatoes and a bag of spicy ones, and went back to cook Yuanyang hot pot.After leaving, Lu Sheng thought as he walked, why did he want the tomato pot so simply? Did he also dislike her for being dark...

Men just like women who are white and weak!But she is so big and black... She is not a bird, she is a big crow...

Nanfeng found that Lu Sheng had become depressed after buying the hot pot base. He was very surprised and asked, "Why, don't you want to eat hot pot?"

"No," Lu Sheng glanced at him, and asked cautiously, "Do you think I'm really that dark?"

Is this what you were struggling with?Nanfeng couldn't help laughing out loud.

"stop laughing!"

"I don't smile, I don't laugh..." He held the corner of his lips and said, "You are not dark. Your complexion is a healthy wheat color."

Lu Sheng twitched the corner of his mouth and asked again, "Do men like fair, thin women?"

Nan Feng put away his smile, raised his hand and gently stroked her head, "Lu Sheng, strong is beautiful."

When he said this, his voice was low, his tone was solemn, and his seriousness made people fascinated.

Facing his clean and deep gaze, her heart almost burst out.Hey, why do you want to seduce people like this, she can hardly suppress the big gangster in her body.

(End of this chapter)