Only married but not in love: Ex-wife, see you tonight!

Chapter 302 Despair
"What she said is the truth, what right do I have to be angry?"

Ruan Anxi's eyes moved away from Shi Yan's body and fell on the void outside the window, her tone was full of self-deprecation: "In the first place, without Xiaobei, I would have nothing. It's ridiculous what Miss Chi said... oh, I really don't know what to say." It was a complete failure."

The more Shi Yan listened, the more he felt that the meaning of her words was wrong, so he couldn't help frowning: "What did you talk about just now?"

"What else can I say?" Ruan Anxi lowered her eyes, seemingly indifferently said: "It's nothing more than that Miss Chi is bound to win you, and advised me to be sensible and quit earlier, you should know all of this, right?"

She has never been the kind of person who secretly puts eye drops on people, but Chi Man really annoyed her just now, and now that Xiaobei is still unknown, her heart is always in a state of turmoil, and she can't speak. It is inevitable that there is no sense.

Shi Yan naturally knew Chi Man's thoughts all the time, but now Ruan Anxi put it on the surface and said that he felt inexplicably ashamed of being "caught" - Shi always never experienced this feeling. Time froze in place, not knowing how to reply.

"Anyway, I'm alone now, and I really don't want to compete with Miss Chi anymore. When I'm in trouble, I'll always let me leave here. From now on, I'll take Xiaobei and disappear before your eyes completely. Are you satisfied with this?"

Ruan Anxi spoke lightly, but Shi Yan's anger was aroused by her easy "leave", but before he could express his anger, a flash of inspiration suddenly appeared in his mind.

Just outside the door, the bodyguard said that he heard Chi Man say "fair competition". Could it be that he meant it?
There is only a layer of veil between some truths and you. I didn’t expect to be confused when I touched it, but as long as I find a thread, the rest is easy to guess.

People like Chi Man never believed in the existence of pure love—or that love could appear in Shi Yan, but if he paid too much attention to something, it must be due to external forces.

Like Ruan Anxi.

In her eyes, Ruan Anxi is just a chess piece launched by the Ruan family, and it is a chess piece that has been discarded once. It cannot be compared with her Miss Chi's family. The reason why such Ruan Anxi can get Shi Yan's favor must be Because of that lovely child Yuxue.

Xiao Bei was Ruan Anxi's weight to win her. Now that Xiao Bei's disappearance is equivalent to Ruan Anxi's loss of weight, Ruan Anxi, who is alone, has no possibility of being compared with her.

That's why she said nonsense about "fair competition", and she must have said other things about Beckham before that.

No wonder she came to the hospital suddenly today, no wonder Ruan Anxi was so angry.

No wonder this person is slowly becoming hostile to him now, maybe he is still trapped in Chi Man's set of fallacies and heresies and has not recovered.

But Shi Yan also knows that Ruan Anxi's mental state is not stable now, if she insists on arguing with her, the result may not be good, and...

Although he doesn't want to admit it, his credit value with Ruan Anxi doesn't seem to be very high. If he confesses his heart now and says that he has always loved her not because of Xiao Bei, the other party may not believe it.

Maybe it's because of his personality, plus he was brought up by an old lady, so he was a relatively conservative person. In his opinion, all sincere thoughts, including "like" and "love", would be lost if he uttered them frequently. It seems that this kind of feeling has been tarnished, so everything he said is absolutely certain.

And the tempering in the market made him subconsciously estimate the risk probability of each matter. If the success probability of an event is below 50.00%, he subconsciously wants to perfect the plan before dealing with it.

Due to multiple factors, although Shi Yan understood Ruan Anxi's current thoughts, in the end he just lowered his head to peel the fruit, but did not speak.

But this kind of silence has become the default in the eyes of the now radical Ruan Anxi, all the past is turbulent in her mind, and her anger is getting bigger and bigger: "If Mr. Shi agrees, please leave here, and we will meet again in the future." Nor will..."

"Stop thinking about it."

Shi Yan finally finished peeling an apple, and while cutting the apple into pieces, he said in a low voice, "I said I will definitely find Xiaobei, and you can rest assured here to recuperate, don't think about anything else."

"Healing with peace of mind?" Ruan Anxi sneered, "Mr. Shi said it lightly, Xiaobei's whereabouts are unknown now, do you think I can rest assured?"

Her voice was a bit high in the last sentence, and she didn't realize it until she finished speaking, but she didn't want to apologize for it, she just stared at Shi Yan, with a lot of emotion hidden in her eyes: "That's right, it seems that Shi always just lost a child , anyway, this child is no longer from the Shi family, is it?"

Anyway, they are already divorced, even if Xiao Bei's biological father is Shi Yan, they have no legal father-daughter relationship.

Not to mention that the Shi family has no shortage of women who want to climb up. If Shi Yan really likes children, he can naturally have other children.

Maybe she's prettier and cuter than Beckham, and there won't be a mother like her who takes her child away from time to time.

This idea seemed to have a sharp knife stuck in Ruan Anxi's heart, and the knife kept stirring relentlessly, so that it took her a while to gather up enough strength to speak again, her voice was much lower: "Maybe I can't ask you to put yourself in the shoes of a substitute." Let me think about it? Xiaobei is my only child, she is my only hope in this world, if something really happens to her, I..."

The rest of the words were choked in his throat, but Shi Yan was shaken by the dead will contained in them, the fruit knife cut his skin mercilessly, and the dark red blood dripped into the porcelain white fruit plate .

It's just that the two people in the room didn't seem to see it. Ruan Anxi finally couldn't hold back the tears that forced her eyes, but Shi Yan interrupted her in a rough voice: "Xiaobei, I will definitely find it."

After he finished speaking, he paused, as if to let people hear the firmness in the words, and then continued: "No accident will happen to her, and neither will you. From now on, we will still be the same as we were a month ago. "

A month ago, the three of them were still a harmonious and beautiful "family", but now they are clearly a real family, but their people and hearts are scattered everywhere, as if God played a big joke on them .

"just like before……"

Ruan Anxi murmured, and after a while she shook her head with a smile, but tears rolled down her face unconsciously: "How could it be the same..."

"Why not the same?"

Shi Yan seemed to be stepped on a sore spot, and his voice was a little excited: "As long as Xiaobei comes back, as long as you stay by my side, of course we can..."

"But why should I stay by your side?"

Ruan Anxi finally raised her eyelids, and her eyes really fell on him, but the latter inexplicably felt a chill in his heart: "Shi Yan, you don't really think that I must be you in this life, do you?"

Without giving Shi Yan a chance to speak again, she actually took the lead in admitting: "Yes, in the past, I really felt that meeting you in this life was a gift from heaven to me, and I felt that I couldn't survive when I was abandoned by you."

Ruan Anxi's introverted personality may be due to the factor of "fear of him". At least before this, Shi Yan had never heard her analyze her mind.

This was the first time he heard Ruan Anxi say clearly that she couldn't do without him.

But before the trace of belated joy flooded up in his heart, Ruan Anxi spoke again: "But until now, I don't know that I was wrong."

"It was an outrageous mistake, and this mistake cost me an unbearable price."

"Although my life before I met you was a bit boring, at least it was fairly stable, but my quiet life was shattered when you signed the agreement with the Ruan family."

Ruan Anxi's tone was calm, as if she was telling someone else's story: "Although you were a little cold when we first met, your appearance--I was young after all, and I always pay attention to appearance first when I look at people. It just so happens that you have a look that can impress everyone With the appearance of forgiveness, my heart gave you half of it at that time."

"Later, although you often seemed to be bored with me, you never betrayed me. You even left work early and bought a cake for my birthday in the first year after marriage."

Speaking of this, Ruan Anxi's voice has a little smile, maybe it's the memory that has put a filter on the past, and looking back at the time, there will always be a little tolerance.Ruan Anxi's smile finally came to his eyes: "I'm very happy, really."

Shi Yan couldn't empathize with this, because... because he didn't remember it at all.

But he knew how much he hated this marriage back then. All his "favors" to Ruan Anxi were mixed with purpose, and maybe this cake was too.

Although he can't remember exactly what he thought at the time, his early mentality has not changed.

It's a pity that he has done too many adulterated "shows" over the years, and he can't remember the incident that the other party likes to talk about.

Fortunately, Ruan Anxi didn't ask him, the smile stopped in his eyes for a few seconds and then quickly covered up: "Perhaps because of these, Aunt Wang has always felt that you really love me."

She unconsciously lowered her voice for the last four words, as if she was laughing at her wishful thinking.

Shi Yan wanted to say that at least [-]% of his feelings for her were true, but before he could speak, he was snatched away by the other party again: "What's more, after the reunion, you invited the old man to the villa. Being gentle to me, coupled with Aunt Wang's persistent persuasion, after four years of suffering, I actually believed in that part of my heart again... the so-called intuition."

"I once felt that all the suffering I suffered was because of meeting you, but I didn't know until now that you caused all of my suffering."

Ruan Anxi's voice gradually calmed down, and her gaze once again fell on Shi Yan through the void: "Shi Yan, all the disasters and sufferings in my life were given by you."

Shi Yan finally knew what was wrong with what he felt at first.

(End of this chapter)