Thank you for making me who I like

Chapter 1 Devoutly believe that love begins with you (1)
boy in the sand
Yang Qianzi

1
The flyover in front of the school was broken, so the road was cut to build the road, and the bus stop I relied on every day was also moved forward by two stops.The bus station that you can see when you go out, now you have to walk for 15 minutes to get there.The yellow sand accumulated due to road construction is flying in front of my eyes like a fog. Just looking at it, I have lost the courage to walk over.

Struggling to go home, he put on the hat attached to his clothes fiercely, rushed into the endless smoke and dust with some heroism, and became embarrassed in the wind and sand.I complained a little, but later, I felt that the embarrassment was also a very lucky thing.Because in the wind and sand all over the sky, I met that boy.

2
The wind and sand that day were as fierce as ever, and the wind mixed with sand and stones blew violently on his face, causing dry pain.I cried so much that my face was stained with tears and the tears kept coming.He simply stopped covering it up, allowing his wet face to be clearly seen in front of the wind and sand.

As I walked, I suddenly felt that the wind and sand all over the world had stopped, and the thick blue sky turned into dazzling white at some point.Looking up, it turned out that a tall boy propped up his white shirt and covered my head, covering me from the yellow sand hovering above my head.He is really tall. I looked up, but I could only see his pointed chin and blue beard.His long eyelashes flickered, but he didn't look at me at all.

A gust of wind blew, and he suddenly hugged my head and blocked me with his back to the front.I smelled the scent of laundry detergent, and the tip of my nose was right where his heart was.At that moment, my imagination suddenly became richer than ever before, and many distant fantasies about eternity were born out of thin air-if I can be protected by him forever like this, I should be very happy.

Walking to the station, he shook off the white shirt as if nothing had happened, and then put it on gracefully.I stood beside him, blushing and shyly saying "thank you".But the tall and thin boy in front of him didn't seem to hear me, he didn't even look at me, he just looked in the direction of the bus.A little embarrassed, I looked down at my hands twisted together, not knowing what to say.

Suddenly, a pack of facial tissues flew over and hit me on the head, which was thrown by the boy.Originally, I could have pulled out a facial tissue to wipe my face very ladylikely, but the indifferent and weird behavior of that boy made my nerves slightly out of balance.Holding the pack of facial tissues, I walked up to him recklessly, poked his back with my fingers, and said in a very innocent tone, "Why did you hit me on the head with this?"

He looked down at me with drooping eyelids and a very unhappy and helpless expression.For the first time, I saw his face clearly. It was a boy from the class next door, a handsome young man on campus.

3
Later, the boy explained his behavior that day and said: "I saw a thin girl walking alone in the wind and sand, and suddenly I felt a feeling of compassion." I pushed his head hard and said, "Come on, let me just say that you have been secretly in love with me for a long time. Not better." He immediately showed a very contemptuous expression, and then I pushed the other side of the head hard.

From that day on, the boy gradually became familiar with me.He once asked me why I cried that day, I shook my head and refused to tell him, but he threatened and lured me.

It is estimated that he attributed the reason for my tears that day to events similar to broken love.But in fact, that day, I was watching "Stairway to Heaven" in the dormitory, and the heroine died, so I cried.Based on my understanding of teenagers, he absolutely can't understand this kind of girl complex who cried pear blossoms and rain for a Korean drama.

4
The weather in the north is still raging with wind and sand, and midsummer is approaching, the air is starting to heat up, but the wind is still fierce, sweeping the sky full of yellow sand and attacking every corner of the city.And I don't complain anymore.Because the boy would hold up his white shirt for me every day, allowing me to experience the closest warmth in the howling wind.Sometimes I also have a moment of intoxication, wondering whether the boy and I will really fall in love with each other.

I am a vague figure in the school, unknown to the public.But the boy is an all-powerful figure in the school, a talented person who has won awards frequently in various competitions.Occasionally, I would take a closer look at him.He is tall and thin, with thin bangs hanging low in front of his eyes. He likes to wear a white shirt with the second button open, showing his collarbone slightly, and he always looks proud and indifferent.Such a boy is indeed very charming.

5
A teenager once asked me why I always like to watch those novels and TV series. He asked me: "Won't you feel tired after reading too many other people's stories?"

He doesn't know, it's beautiful just because it's someone else's story, what story can I have?

"Maybe it's because I also want to have a life like the one in the novel. I don't have to do anything to have a happy family, a beautiful appearance, and a boyfriend like a prince." I thought he would despise me if I said such hypocritical words some.But when she looked up at him, she happened to meet his clear eyes, with a sincere and pure expression like a child.

"So, am I your prince?"

I froze for a long time, unable to say a word.A hollow whiteness suddenly spread in the head, stretching as far as the eye can see.

He suddenly patted me on the head: "Look at your nympho look, a handsome man like me is not a prince, does it take me so long to think about it?"

I suddenly smiled with relief.This kind of emotion mixed with relaxation and loss made me just smile and nod, but I couldn't find a suitable sentence to tease.

"But, I like you." The boy suddenly said seriously.

6
I couldn't answer the boy's abrupt confession.That was not a long time together, but it suddenly became extremely precious and warm.He didn't know that I was already in the process of withdrawing from school and applying for a visa to the United States.

I left and never saw the boy again.

Whenever there is a surge of sand and dust, I still can't help but think of that boy, looking in the direction of the wind, watching his tall shadow in memory.

In a long life, will there be such a person who will hold up a white shirt for me in the midsummer wind and sand?Will there be such a person who pats my head and says seriously that he likes me?

see you, think of you, forget you

Artemisia annua
You have changed a lot, your skin is fairer than two years ago, your face has become thinner, you wear gold-rimmed glasses, and you also put on the white shirt that you sneered at when you said it was worn by literary youths, and turned out the clean and beautiful collar and cuffs .There is another group of people around you, they are laughing quietly around you, and you are not the same as two years ago, you did not fight with them, but quietly flipped through the book in your hand.

But I still recognized you at a glance.Although two years have made you taller, thinner and quieter, just by taking a look at you, the image of you grinning, sweating while holding a football, and snoring during lunch break will be clear and complete in my mind surfaced.

Two years ago, you were not what you are now. At that time, you were nervous, rude, loud, picky, and would persuade the boys in the class to skip class to the football field to play football all afternoon, and you would play games all night. The next day, I went to the classroom with red eyes to catch up on sleep.You see, at that time, you really had no advantages in your body.

But it was also like you, who stopped me who was rushing home from school one evening, stuffed a book into my arms, looked away, and said inarticulately: "I heard that you like Jane This book, I bought it for you specially, I hope you like it, and then like me." When you said this, you had already blushed uncomfortably.But I still asked: "What did you say?" You turned your head and looked at me angrily and said loudly: "I just want you to like me!"

To be honest, your confession was not romantic at all, even very clumsy, but it still became my warmest memory over the years.Later, when I looked through the collection of Jane's essays you gave me, I found the love letter you wrote to me. You carefully smoked the grass-green letter paper with the fragrance of magnolia flowers.Your handwriting is not pretty, and your words are simple, but you don't know how beautiful those words are in my heart.

After we got together, you have restrained a lot, you are no longer late for class, and the games at night are replaced by math problems, you eat breakfast on time every day, and take notes carefully during class.You would take a chair and sit next to me during lunch break and read Jian Jie's prose to me.You will take me to eat large moon cakes, and when I complain that I am fat and no one wants it, I say: "Don't worry, even if you don't eat fat, no one will dare to take you except me." Every day you will use a Write me simple quotations on the scented note you cut yourself, one sentence per day, and put it in a glass bottle.I put the glass bottle on the upper right corner of my desk, and watched as the number of notes in it increased day by day. Every time I opened it, a scent would immediately condense in my nose, which would last for a long time.Later, I counted them one by one, and there were 365 in total, just like the 365 days we were together, lying sadly in that glass bottle, turning yellow day by day.

I remember one New Year's Day, you took me to the square to countdown to the New Year.When the crowd was surging, you held my hand tightly.At the third to last second, you suddenly shouted in my ear: "If there is a dream that I can't wake up from, I will definitely follow it; if there is a road that can't be finished, I will definitely go; Love, I will definitely ask for it." That was Jian Jie's sentence, and it was also a promise you made to me when I was young.That time, for the first time, I cried in front of you without a ladylike image, and my tears wet your scarf.

and after?
Later, we separated for our respective futures.You can't beat your parents and transfer to a better school.You were suddenly separated from my life, and time became a pool of stagnant water, but two years passed slowly.In the past two years, I have been busy, participating in various club activities, working harder to do more exercises, and I am fully immersed in the upcoming college entrance examination.I never had extra time to think about you, I always thought you were a deep wound in my heart, untouchable.

Until today, two years later, when I saw you again, my heart was peaceful, and the pain that I thought would be surging like waves did not exist at all.Time is really a great healer, the sweetness and promise at the beginning has nothing to do with this moment.

I heard your classmates calling your name.You raised your head in response and closed the book.Then, as if you sensed something, you looked towards me.You looked at me with calm eyes and smiled at me from a distance.At this moment, the sunlight behind you is extremely clear, illuminating the whole season brightly.

I'm afraid you have forgotten, my beloved Jane also said this passage: "Oaths are used to tie the turbulent heart, but they will eventually tie the emptiness. The mountains and forests do not swear to the four seasons, prosperity and decline follow fate; the ocean does not need to meet the sandy shore. Promise, meet and have fun. Even language should be abandoned, between you and me, there is only clean silence and existence."

pass by your youth
Made
This summer is a little bit special.One is that we were promoted to the legendary third year of the devil high school, and the other is that Zhou Xiaowan parachuted into our class.

The sycamore tree outside the window has dense leaves, which makes the summer flourishing and a little flirtatious.A branch slanted out, protruding the greenery to the window.I reached out and grabbed one of them, and said, Hey, Liu Xiaozhou, look, how big is this leaf, does it look like your ear?Liu Xiaozhou ignored me.When I turned around, he was winking at me, exaggeratedly winking.What kind of nerve is this?When I turned around again, my soul flew away——when did the head teacher come in without making a sound.

Tang Zhengdong, this is Zhou Xiaowan's classmate, transferred from the provincial capital, let her sit at your table.

I pretended to be reserved, neither agreed nor objected.Out of the corner of her eye, Zhou Xiaowan was wearing a white dress, with a graceful figure, she really was a sister Lin who fell from the sky.I went down and down, cleaned up the table, and said, welcome, new classmate.

I was still reserved and didn't smile.When I first arrived, I had to pretend to be a little more serious.

In fact, studying liberal arts is quite boring. I memorize and memorize all day long. Thousands of years of history, the land, mountains and rivers of the seven continents, go backwards and forwards, tossing us into darkness and darkness.

You can't carry that back.One day, when the peaks and peaks gathered between my brows, the waves were like anger, and I was carrying history in pain, I heard Zhou Xiaowan stop drinking in my ears.I hurriedly drove the peaks and mountains to disperse the waves, and listened attentively.Zhou Xiaowan dug up a historical question, to the effect that calligraphers and painters of a certain dynasty liked to write inscriptions between bushes and rocks, painters of a certain dynasty liked to leave blank spaces, and calligraphers and painters of a certain dynasty liked to fill the entire picture, and then asked such questions What does the phenomenon reflect.

I scratched my head and scratched my head.Truth be told, none of this is in the history books.Zhou Xiaowan said that the comprehensive essay questions in the college entrance examination are very lively, and understanding is actually more important than memorization.When Zhou Xiaowan said these words, her expression was still very serious, as if she was speaking to me, but also as if she was speaking to herself.I found that at that moment, I listened piously and seriously.For many years, even if I listened to the teacher's class, I never took it so seriously.

See the sun through the clouds?no.Enlightenment?Nor is it.I just vaguely felt that the person who parachuted to my side was not simply here to sit at the same table as me, but to save me.

According to the head teacher, Zhou Xiaowan is a repeat student.The college entrance examination score exceeded the first line by more than 30 points. Because I couldn't get into the ideal school, I chose to repeat it.

It turned out to be a senior.The whole class immediately looked at her with admiration.As for me, I am even more ashamed of myself.Zhou Xiaowan, on the other hand, remained calm and pointed it out bluntly when she found that there was a deviation in my understanding of the problem.Her voice is very nice, how should I put it, the spring water is tinkling, not too slow, Wang Wei's "Clear Spring Rocks Upstream" should be referring to her.

Outside the window, the sound of cicadas is dense, weaving the sultry heat of summer more and more airtight.If it were in normal times, I would have pushed aside the Han and Tang Dynasties, overturned the Song, Yuan, Ming and Qing Dynasties, and gone looking for the cicada.Now, I dare not.Zhou Xiaowan sat beside me, quietly writing and doing questions. Even the scorching heat moved her face, so I had no choice but to calm down.

Because of such an awe-inspiring and inviolable tablemate, Liu Xiaozhou, my best friend who has been playing with me, rarely takes the initiative to play with me.Liu Xiaozhou said with a playful smile, Hey, Tang Zhengdong, doesn't your deskmate like to listen to Xu Song's songs?Xu Song has a song called "City Mansion", you can ask how deep her city mansion is.

I said, get out, it's not serious at all.Then, when he turned around, he gave him an indignant back.

He won't understand. In my heart, Zhou Xiaowan cannot be profaned.

Just halfway through autumn, the entire liberal arts class was hurting, and the class brothers were divided into pieces.I was still in the original class, but Zhou Xiaowan was assigned to another class.Who is she sitting with?The sky outside the window is blue and high, it is late autumn.The leaves began to fall one by two, very much like my chaotic thoughts at the moment.

Suddenly, a classmate shouted at the door: Tang Zhengdong, someone is looking for you.

It's Zhou Xiaowan.She was wearing a red coat, standing on the promenade outside the classroom, her face was still bright and clear, like a bright moon rising above her snow-white shirt.

Tang Zhengdong.She called me, still the same voice as spring water.This book should be yours, right?She waved the book in her hand to me, smiled slightly, and said, I was too hasty when I assigned classes that day, and it got mixed up in my pile of books, so I will return it to you.

Then turned around and she was gone.In the corridor, I was left with a silly face.

Like a plot in a movie, but not all.I sat down on my seat in frustration, and casually threw the book she returned to me. Suddenly, a note came out from the gap in the book and fell lightly on the ground.

Beautiful, O. Henry-like ending.

Zhou Xiaowan's class is upstairs.

During dinner, I usually go to the cafeteria very late and wander around the stairs.Of course, in Liu Xiaozhou's words, I did all this with premeditation—waiting for Zhou Xiaowan to come down and have dinner together.

I like to walk through the campus at dusk with Zhou Xiaowan.The setting sun shines quietly, and the afterglow passes through the gaps in the poplar forest, and sprinkles on us in spots.The setting sun stretches my shadow long, and her shadow also long.When I turned a corner, my shadow fell into her shadow, and when I turned another corner, her shadow overlapped with mine.

Long shadows are entangled with short shadows, like unreasonable youth.

One day, just as Zhou Xiaowan and I went downstairs, we ran into the teacher from the Political and Education Office head-on.He stood there with a gloomy expression and an imperceptible smugness.That posture, as if he had seamlessly set up an ambush, and then caught us perfectly.He said, you two, come here, I've been watching you two for a long time.

what happened?
what happened?Don't you know that the school does not allow male and female students to have close relationships?
I pulled Zhou Xiaowan up and ran away like flying.We ran and laughed.

Yes, there is nothing between us, and no one is afraid.

When I saw Zhou Xiaowan again, it was at the [-]-day swearing-in meeting for the college entrance examination.As a student representative, she spoke on the rostrum.Everyone forgot what the principal said that day, but Zhou Xiaowan's sonorous and powerful speech lingered in the hearts of the students for many days.

It's been a long time, and we haven't had dinner together again.The college entrance examination is coming soon, and everyone is as busy as a cloud, floating in the sky, going away and coming again suddenly, but there is no shadow in sight.Once, Zhou Xiaowan saw me, greeted me from a distance, and said, I saw your results in this one-model test, and you are 40th in the grade, which is really good.You can see that she is really happy for me.At that moment, I really wanted to rush up and give her a high-five, but in the end, I just smiled very subtly and said, you did better in the exam, you are the first in the grade, and I will learn from you.

Overnight, I became a typical example of our class.The head teacher opened and shut his mouth and said, "Look at Tang Zhengdong..." and called on the whole class to learn from me.For a while, I was a little swollen, and I felt a little frightened when I walked and talked.It was still Liu Xiaozhou, who gave me a hand at the critical moment and said, buddy, calm down!

(End of this chapter)