sleepless tonight

Chapter 40 He's Not My Dad
There was a girl lying on the hospital bed, very haggard, her hair was gone, she was wearing a mask, and she didn't look very healthy. It could be seen that when Brother Zheng came in, the girl's eyes lit up.

I put the flowers on the side cabinet and stood aside.

Looking at the girl on the bed, I suddenly thought of Chen Ke and Chen Le.

I was thinking, what should I do if Chen Ke and Chen Le accidentally got sick and were lying on the hospital bed?
Life is impermanent, and no one can predict what will happen in the next moment.

After entering the hospital, this kind of mood of impermanence kept lingering in my heart, getting more and more concentrated, and pessimistic emotions permeated all at once, making people feel oppressed and breathless.

"Father, I want to be discharged from the hospital. I don't want to stay here anymore." Xiaojie looked at Brother Zheng, her voice was a little weak, and it took a lot of strength to say a word.

"Then how can it work? You are about to recover soon, how can you leave the hospital now? When you recover, Dad will take you out of the hospital, okay? Wherever you want to go, Dad will take you there." Zheng Ge coaxed , the voice is suppressed, for fear that it will startle the daughter if it grows too loud.

"I want to go now." Xiaojie said, a little eager.

"Be obedient, you have to be obedient, if you are obedient, Dad will take you there, okay?" Brother Zheng continued to coax, putting his hand on the girl's quilt, gently.

"No, I'm going now. If I don't go, I'm afraid I won't have a chance to go. Dad, please promise me? I don't want to die on a hospital bed, I don't want to die in a cold hospital." Xiao Jay begged.

At such a young age, it seems that he has seen through life and death, and there is no longing for life in his eyes, only a sense of urgency.

"You won't die, don't worry, dad won't let you die, dad will save you, you have to trust dad." Brother Zheng said with a sob.

Xiaojie pulled out her hand and put it on the back of Zheng Ge's hand: "I know that you have tried your best, Dad, and I also know what is going on with me now. I hope that the rest of the time can be spent by your side and with Dad , we are all happy, instead of lying on the hospital bed, smelling the medicine, waiting to die slowly in the cold room."

Xiaojie turned her head and looked at the window: "Dad, do you know? You can be seen from that place."

Brother Zheng looked back and saw the window, paused for a moment, then stood up, and walked over. The place facing the window was the direction of the hospital gate, and he could see the fruit stand under the hospital.

The rain outside the window was still dripping.

"Xiaojie, Dad did lie to you before, and the family didn't have much money, but this time, Dad didn't lie to you. There is hope for your illness, so you have to persevere." Brother Zheng glanced at me, and then said to his daughter , "This is a friend that Dad knows. He has a way to get you to a better hospital and receive better treatment. When you get better, Dad will take you out to play again, okay?"

After talking for a while, Xiaojie looked very tired, every word seemed to exhaust her strength, she looked at me, and the gloomy eyes regained a little life.

No one is willing to die. If there is hope of life, who would give it up voluntarily, just because there are too many helplessness, too much concern, and some things have to be fulfilled by death.

"Live well, you won't die." I only said one sentence, and then I exited the ward, leaving space to the father and daughter.

I couldn't face Xiaojie's eyes calmly. It's not that I don't believe that the plan will be successful, but I'm worried that even if I change to another hospital, can such a disease really be cured?

If not, did I harm them?At the last moment of their lives, the father and daughter waited for time to escape from this ward together, escape from this cold place, and take a look at the warm world again.

Only in the face of death can you feel the value of life, and life is precious.

I thought of Chen Ke and Chen Le, my two daughters.For the sake of face, for the sake of dignity, do I really want to continue to confront Tong Wangjun, never communicate with each other, and even refuse to see my daughter?

Life is full of accidents, and no one can predict what will happen in the next moment. Standing in the hospital full of medicine smell, I suddenly want to see Chen Ke very much.

The door of the ward opened, and Brother Zheng didn't stay inside for too long.

"I lied to her before, saying that the family still has money. I didn't expect that she would stand by the window and see my stall." Brother Zheng said softly, and after a while, he asked me, "Do you have any cigarettes? "

"This is a hospital." I reminded.

"Let's smoke outside." Brother Zheng seemed to have something to tell me.

When I walked out of the hospital, I didn't hold an umbrella, I took out a cigarette, handed it to Brother Zheng, lit it for him, and I smoked another one for myself.

"Are you saying it's right for me to do this?" Zheng Ge took a puff of cigarette.

I look at him.

"I asked the doctor, and the doctor said that even if we change hospitals, with sufficient funds and higher medical standards, the chance of being cured is only 25%." Zheng Ge said, "If it doesn't work, I mean if, if Xiaojie couldn't make it through, I was afraid she would leave with regrets."

"Over the years, I have never been with her properly, even a week before she got sick, it was her birthday, I said I would spend it with her, but I didn't. At that time, the business was in a bad mood, I think When my business improves, I will take her to the Maldives. She has mentioned this place to me many times and has always wanted to go, but I have been procrastinating."

"When business was busy, I said I wanted to make more money. When business was bad, I didn't have the mood to do it myself. I kept procrastinating until now, but the money was gone, and Xiaojie was lying on the hospital bed."

Brother Zheng's eyes were a little hollow, numb and hungry, smoking a cigarette.

"Think of a better place, take her to the Maldives when she recovers from her illness," I persuaded.

I dare not think, what if it is not good, what will happen?I dare not think too deeply about some things, otherwise my heart will hurt.

After saying goodbye to Brother Zheng, I drove to Chen Ke's school.

It was still early before school ended, so I found a place facing the school gate, held an umbrella, stood in the heavy rain, and stared at the school silently.

There was never a moment when I was so eager to see my daughter, to see Chen Ke, to ask her what wishes she had, what she wanted to eat and play.

I have some spare money, and I want to give it all to my daughter.

The cold wind and rain fell on my hands, passed through the soles of my shoes, and my hands and feet were cold, but I didn't want to leave.

I was reminiscing, reminiscing about the bits and pieces with Chen Ke, but in fact there were not many, just the memory of ten or twenty days.

But Chen Ke and I seem to have known each other for many years. This may be the emotional bond that blood is thicker than water. Even if there is no memory, the emotions are still there, engraved in the bone marrow, and the longing can't stop for a moment .

This period of waiting was a torment for me. Several times I wanted to climb over the courtyard wall, enter the school secretly, and take a look at Chen Ke from the window to see if she was doing well and if she had lost weight. Is it cold?

just watch.

There are more and more people outside the school, all parents who come to pick up their children.

The bell rang and school was over.

I poked my head, avoiding umbrellas one after another, followed the crowd to the school gate, tiptoed, probed, and tried my best to look inside.

I saw Chen Ke, she was walking slowly with her schoolbag on her back.Her schoolbag was changed, and her clothes were brand new, but she didn't seem to be in a very high mood. She held a small umbrella, lowered her head, and walked slowly towards the school gate, and beside her were students running fast.

"A Ke." Before she could reach the school gate, I raised my arms and called out.

She seemed to hear something, looked up and looked around.

I took the umbrella off my head and let the rain fall on me, and I shouted again.

Chen Ke raised her umbrella, raised her head, and saw me.

But the expression on her face made my heart ache, there was no excitement, no joy, only resentment.

My excitement was all gone, and my whole body was filled with fear.

Chen Ke passed by me and ignored me. I panicked and took a few steps: "It's Dad, Dad is here to see you."

She kept walking, ignoring me.

"A Ke." I followed behind and almost bumped into a starting electric car.

"No, you are not my father." Chen Ke finally stopped and stared at me.

I wanted to pull her, and several parents surrounded me, pointing at me, looking bad.

"Who is this person? Do you know him?" A teacher-like person came over.

"Ms. Liu, I don't know him, he's not my father." Chen Ke still didn't change his words, gnashing his teeth.

(End of this chapter)